Name: Cinco De Amigos | Ep 63 | Bad Friends
Uploaded: 2021-05-03T16:00:04.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Cinco De Amigos | Ep 63 | Bad Friends' from Bad Friends on Comedy Buff. Published 2021-05-03. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Cinco De Amigos | Ep 63 | Bad Friends' from Bad Friends on Comedy Buff. Published 2021-05-03. Transcript available.

Cinco De Amigos | Ep 63 | Bad Friends

you two are bad friends who are these two idiots
white dude and an asian dude you two are disgusting
you two are something we're bad friends
no listen you know you know what it is the themes
don't do the themes and then that's what fucks me up the themes fuck me up the
theme look around
look what andre's to put someone happy cinco de mayo
ay ay ay ay ay ay ay
happy Cinco de Mayo bob happy Cinco de Mayo
happy Cinco de Mayo
you you know do you know what Cinco de Mayo means rudy
no what is it yeah you do you know what it is right
no yes i do what is it
it's happy fifth mayonnaise
happy fifth mayonnaise my favorite Cinco de Mayo movie is La Bamba
that's a great movie all right can i ask you a question i had a dream too richie
one of his brother his brother was an artist right yeah
right and then at the end of the movie he had to get it out you know you have
to
you have to i had a dream too yeah but your art's not as good as his
it's really bad oh he's a cartoonist right it's bad yeah it's not good
yeah i mean so you didn't have to say that out it's like you know
it's like you know if i was one of the baldwins you are kind of
oh yeah alec billy bobby yeah if you were a baldwin dude if i was a
baldwin dude but i was adopted if i was genetically what a good story
by the way yeah you know the ball you know the
walburgers have a burger joint yeah the baldwins have like a just like a
korean street food joint yeah billy
yeah the one the one the one the one brother i wouldn't get along with i think
is steven
no you would not get along with steve because he's kind of alty right
he's all he is he alt right yeah he's kind of like you know right wing a little
bit oh he is
yeah he doesn't get along with uh alec and all those guys i mean they still
hang out and stuff
but it's like and alec is like so far left
yeah he's the most left and his brother is is super super far right but steven's
in the middle
but steven's daughter hmm she's hot she is isn't she dating wait who's dating
um
justin bieber yeah that's oh right that is his daughter what what why did you i
thought it was
alec baldwin's daughter no steven baldwin's daughter oh it's ailey hailey bailey
hailey
hailey bald bieber hailey bald bieber yeah and i would be the creep if i was a
if that if i was
the adopted um like adopted like uh uncle yeah i would probably should attack
her out of bieber
so i could get in there can you imagine trying to convince her to be with you
instead of justin
bieber yeah go ahead and do it i'm hailey baldwin that's creepy though i'm hailey
baldwin go well if
since i was adopted hey what's that if i was adopted i would have a little
accent yeah you of course you
would yeah yeah hey what's up oh bob hey it's so good to see you are you gonna
join us for dinner
no no i want to talk to you oh what's up you want to talk to me alone no you
know you know back in
the shed you want to go outside to the shed yeah just i want to talk to you
real quickly let me just
ask justin justin is that okay yes justin get the out of here hey hey don't
talk to just like that by
the way you did a great show at the uh at the fight you know where he did the
fight oh yeah yeah
very good very good yeah you did baby yeah yeah we'll be right back we're gonna
go to the shed
justin all of a sudden we're gonna go to the shed okay okay have a good time
here we go anyway anyway
what did you want to talk to me about yeah i want to talk to you about uh you
unusual suspects
yo you're dead you know my brother steve your dad my brother yeah yeah he did a
really good job
it's so good in that movie it's so good yeah you know who else was it it was
the kevin spacey was
i went to the premiere kevin spacey yeah yeah i love him yeah he's a uh really
good actor you know
me but he likes such a people person yeah well when i went to the premiere you
know with the unusual
social premiere right uh kevin goes come to the bathroom like like i did with
you at the shed yeah
sure he did the one come to the bathroom what you guys doing there well i pee
in you you know when i go
to the bathroom i wash my hand first yeah right i i i wash my head twice i wash
my hair first yeah right
i pee right because i'm from china originally really yeah i thought you were korean
no originally
oh originally originally originally i'm from china yeah right so i go in i wash
my handful right i pee pee
right then sometimes i get the pee pee on my hand sure i wash again right
anyway this time i wash my hair
right and kevin wash his hand but not in the faucet on my ass crack i don't
know why he was doing back
there but he was just kind of doing this you know what i thought you were
saying i thought you were
going to say while you're washing your hands kevin spacey put his penis in
between your hands while
that's a funny that's a funnier you're like that's funny
he just slips his dick and he's like yeah he's like what's going on yeah and it
would it'd be weird
because your hands would be wet yeah yeah that'd be good but you're like i can't
keep the soap won't
come off right so um oh there he is there's space dog anyway i don't know why i
brought you to the
shed oh yeah i forgot yeah i was just telling you i was just telling you i was
just telling how much i
love our usual suspect anyway uh just some people he uh he gay
he is i know for back he gay okay because when kevin spacey when i was washing
my head
yeah and his penis was in my hand right he told me he goes yeah do it like you
know do it like bieber
do it oh just like bieber do it so i was going what bieber what it is two two
and two click
in my head all right i go aha all right and number two you know you and i are
not blood related
that's the pitch you know we're not related but you know what what if you were
hitting on
me and i was hayley b bald bieber yeah i'd be into it no i don't think so i
would especially when
you have those beanies on when you let me tell you something when you wear beanies
your sex
quotient goes through the roof uh without beanies fine you're cute bob yeah
with the beanie there's
something that you do with a little beanie do you wear beanies when you're
naked i wait what i do i
sometimes i'll wake up right and jules i'll i mean look at this your beanie
your your beanie sex
quotient goes through the roof by the way that picture that i think liz vid
liz vigiano took of you which one with the green shirt top right oh that's dope
i think that's one
of the best photos you you have and she's so talented she's the what's her name
again
liz vigiano yeah yeah she's so good she's the best what's this so it's sincchio
de mayo
what else hispanic movies do you like three amigos really good movie such a
good movie yeah really
good i mean granted the three you ever see three amigos oh it's a classic you
have to watch it is
three white guys which does really it's a little weird yeah yeah but you know
who was in it that you
don't you're not aware but it was a comedy store guy hold on let me guess you're
not gonna guess it
well no i'll give you i'll give you a paycheck you know this is my wife's
favorite movie literally
if you guess the name okay so it's a stand-up right he's a comedy store legend
yeah right he was in
the movie okay and um was he one of the mexican gangsters no don't you can't
okay okay okay no
guesses he was mexican he still is i hope i don't think he was i don't think he's
mexican real life
but he played mexican in three amigos yeah okay yeah yeah and he might be i don't
we have to look
it up later but um he was in the movie and i'll give you um all my proceeds
that i make now
seriously for this episode and i'll give it to you okay you're never gonna
guess that's how i pulled
freddy soto no he was freddy still was three years old when that i know dude i
know i don't know i don't
know who it was his name but we got the first right name right freddy prince no
his name was freddy
asparagus shut up bobby freddy asparagus look it up freddy asparagus that's it
that was his state
what's his real name that's his name freddy asparagus that guy at the bar that's
him that's
one of my five love that guy that's freddy asparagus i fucking told you dude freddy
asparagus can i tell
you something about fredd asparagus that scene i know is one of my he's like he
was so good you'll
you'll hear for the germans yeah that yeah that scene yeah freddy asparagus he
was a comedy store
guy oh yeah bro yeah was he funny we'll go freddy asparagus um comedy store
just see what that
happened but hold on one second that tequila scene by the way when they're like
yeah that's one of the
best scenes of all yeah i can't you need to watch three amigos yeah yeah that's
okay it's so it's so
sad because there's a there's a whole group of like comics that you know the
comedy store is known for um
you know the famous people that came out of there sure but there are a whole um
group of guys and
girls that like almost made it that were like you know um that nobody knows
about let me say that's
the majority of people right yeah but they were all but they were also mitzi's
favorite so they would
get spots every night right right so there's like you know freddy asparagus
then you have wild willie
parsons i know who that was yeah and then you have um um to my out seek it's at
suku would be one um
there's a whole group and it's kind of sad well because they were like cult
classic versus commercial
classic films same kind of thing like mitzi liked quirky weird specific really
unique comics but it
doesn't mean they were gonna have commercial success but she also knew who was
gonna blow up no but there
was one who okay so there was one if you ask anybody from the 80s you ask jim
carrey you ask
anyone from that era right yeah um howie mendel whoever it might be you go rosenberg
you go name
me one person that back then you thought was gonna be the biggest star ever and
you've never even heard
of him his name was finnis henderson finnis look that up finnis henderson i
think that's his name and what
he and what happened did he die that's him he looks like dice in that yeah that's
finnis henderson
he's a weird looking cat yeah yeah so this guy right apparently when he
performed uh it was like
standing out like he did you know why huh because he sang dance did impression
he's saying dead
impressions twist twirl right in a 15 minute spot yeah and then people in the
back would be like oh
fuck i gotta follow this guy because anyone that does music and does the
dancing right right and
he crushed it i heard is he not still around did he pass away i don't know i've
never met him go
to the go to the picture of him in the white beater on the down left third road
yeah so that's
that's that's finished now and he can do your hedges and plant
for 13.99 yeah he looked this he looks like it's not going as well as it was
when you were talking
about yeah yeah but you know what's so weird he's like an extra in oz that's
what he doesn't he look
like you know what i mean yeah he has one line in oz yeah yeah oh dude or he's
like you know he's the
guy that he in a movie he's the convict right that's older he's that that that
cleaned up his act
and is teaching other kids yeah yeah i'm not doing that no more yeah he's that
guy what do
you mean finn you were the one that led this block right look at the vein like
um how about this let's
like the head the guy that took that headshot uh can couldn't have said hey did
you take any photos
um where it didn't expose every vein in my neck actually i bet you he wants
that as the look yeah
oh can you photoshop all the veins in my neck hey hey you're my photographer i'm
finn yeah this is a
regular photo tell me to give you some more vein well here's the first shot
ready yeah yeah um no um
hey finn yeah can i call you finn of course yeah yeah um can you um for right
before i shoot don't
breathe for like 15 seconds okay right and also just tense your body up okay
and then and then okay
lean your head back yes right yeah and just especially on y