Name: Urban Bobby & The Gucci Gang | Ep 80 | Bad Friends ft. Doc Willis
Uploaded: 2021-08-30T16:00:22.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Urban Bobby & The Gucci Gang | Ep 80 | Bad Friends ft. Doc Willis' from Bad Friends on Comedy Buff. Published 2021-08-30. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Urban Bobby & The Gucci Gang | Ep 80 | Bad Friends ft. Doc Willis' from Bad Friends on Comedy Buff. Published 2021-08-30. Transcript available.

Urban Bobby & The Gucci Gang | Ep 80 | Bad Friends ft. Doc Willis

ladies and gentlemen welcome to the bad friends podcast with bobby lee and my
boy andrew santino
damn that's good you two are bad friends who are these two idiots
and an asian dude you two are disgusting
something we're bad friends so if everyone's listening are you recording we're
recording
yeah that's what it sounded like right so um he's from a different land you
know that oh yeah yeah
so um andrew is uh shooting dave right now he's gonna be a little late jules is
in hawaii surfing
or something with kalilah so she couldn't make it so we asked my man right here
doc to fill in jules
but now andrew's not here so we're just going to start without him to see what
happens yeah see
what oh yeah yeah do you get no i can tell you don't know you can't no you can't
i've always been able
to tell that you you struggle to get the no no i never struggle that's the
problem with you
always get it always yeah you always here's your thing yeah yeah you you have
this you live in bobby's
world right in bobby's world yeah whatever he believes that's what's real and
it's like no yeah
yeah yeah like you remember one time yeah go ahead you looked at me and you was
like doc you're a nerd
and i go what did you know anything yeah yeah like if you said that to anybody
else who knew me they'll
be like who yeah where you who are you talking to i okay stop all right i'm
just i want to get to
know you better that's all you do all right i want to get to you that's why you're
here i want to get to
know you better so um you get a lot of then yeah i get what i get yeah yeah
which is what like like
in a year in a year dude dude in the near here's here's mine mine be honest i'm
telling you because
i've never seen you with a girl but it don't matter what you see you know right
right it doesn't matter
what i see yeah what if you live in your world what in your world right you
think that you have all
this stuff yeah it puts all in your head so that's what you believe that's good
all right yeah so you
get so you you let's just put it this way yeah i get women it's not it's not
hard it's never and
that's the thing about california i never even understood when dudes say they
don't get women
i'll be like what how's that possible how do you not get women coming like it's
easy out here all day
yeah you see you didn't start getting them until you got famous right what you
just started getting
until you start getting famous say that again slowly you didn't start getting
women until you
got like famous right there dude that's rude what you're saying well you know i
got a little rude in
me yeah yeah yeah yeah so what you're saying to me is that before i could get a
name for myself
i couldn't get any girls right is that what you're saying yeah that's 100% what
i'm saying
i don't even think you got to read between your lines i know i said that's so
perfect even the audience
was like let me challenge you on that then okay let's do it how long have i
known you
shoot since i probably feel about 2001 that's when i first started going to the
comedy right so
20 years 20 years yeah right yeah not one time not one time okay have i seen
you with a woman oh wow
20 years but working at the store you've only seen me at the store working we're
not arguing don't get
emotional don't get emotional you're getting emotional here's your problem don't
tell me what i have
problems yeah okay go ahead tell me what my problem is okay one problem problem
you're crazy to the
mother yeah that's one right there yeah yeah yeah and like i said you live in
this little bubble yeah
and for some reason yeah you actually believe the that you have in your head
and it's not real i'll
i'll tell you why i'll tell you why though okay you know i i i i find you cute
as a button
awkward yeah yeah okay yeah when i when i tell you that right how do you feel
like nothing like okay
like i literally like wanna like grab you oh i see and stick you in my pocket
wow and walk around i i think
that you are just cute as a button and number two i always thought that like
how tall are you five
three there's no way what how tall are you who's taller than you or i that's a
good question
i never even okay let's do this america we about to show y'all
i got you i got you a little bit so you like five four i'm five two yeah i'm
five two bro you're
five foot no don't do that what do you mean what do you mean hold on hold on
let me get situated
that's frustrating right why why why because uh you can't take away no because
i we already measured
myself who did here at bad friends we already did the measurements no no no no
no hey come here we
can do it again we can do it again do it again no no we're not doing it again
okay five two that's
what i'm talking about all right so you're not five two you're not five two
because i'm five three
so i'm five four yes if that's all i wanted maybe five three and a half at the
most you're
i'm an inch taller than you for sure i just i just did it i just think you uh
your shoulders is big
yeah no one's ever said that big big shoulders like michael phelps yeah like
they got little
traps you know what i'm saying so i'm five four yeah so that this feels good
this feels good yeah
so um you're five two i'll just say five two i'm five three well let's just do
let's go one
inch lower okay okay and um i have to apologize for a couple things all right
let's hear it all
right in our history yeah yeah you owe me some guys i followed this to come out
yeah yeah number one
go ahead i remember when gary coleman died
i i saw you at the comedy store and i walked up to you you were with a bunch of
friends and stuff
right and i i said to you i thought you had died
yeah yeah it was and i could see you have a memory i do because i remember
seeing your face
right and you gotta laugh in front of your friends yeah right but you had a
face and never apologize
for that right so i don't think i was hurt by it you were you're not yeah i'm a
comedian so if i didn't
sit back and giggle a little bit but look a little i'll say this yeah yeah i'll
say this somewhere there
was a baby that died somewhere when you say that that was you know what i don't
know what i'm talking
i'm just trying to express myself yeah yeah yeah no baby died man yeah yeah
yeah my bad my bad america
no baby died yeah yeah um number two my second apology is you open for me okay
did you not host it
for you i never hope that's opening i thought the feature was though no they're
both opening oh okay
yeah what do you think the host is opening for the feature no they thought the
host was like
the warm-up dude not the no no no no you you you open right right right right
and i made you do some
things on stage like what you don't remember like i said when you go up on
stage you have to say
yabba dabba do oh yeah 10 times and not tell the audience why you're saying it
but man yeah so man
now y'all know what the the comic this is the equivalent to fret hazing this is
this yeah yeah
but it's funny then you'd have to go up yeah yeah and see yabba dabba do yeah
in between jokes
and not explain to the audience while you said it all right that was the first
yeah that was like the
first thing yeah i forgot all about yeah man i forget i something else i told
you to do another thing
where i go just randomly when you're opening you have to just without
explaining yourself you have
to do a little hopscotch right like you know like they're doing hopscotch right
and you have to do
it across the stage and not tell the audience why you did that menace man you
know it's funny
because it's for me yeah i know but it's for my entertainment because between
you and steve bird and
another they're like the the the crazy things that go on in these shows yes it's
so much fun and you
forget about all of that i forgot like especially you you are like yeah i did i
ever do this to you
where i like they would say your name and i would block the door so you wouldn't
go up on stage no you
didn't do that yeah i used to do that too yeah and like the opening like let me
up i go no just wait
a minute you know i mean so there's like no one on stage they already said your
name
it always gave me a lot of pleasure but is that bullying you think yeah it is
that's how you are
though you just you think i'm a bully yeah do you you really think i'm a bully
yeah that's how you are
it makes you feel good in your heart it doesn't make me feel good i'll tell you
why i was bullied
so hard not only growing up but in comedy that it's like when i finally could
do it you know i didn't
you know i didn't snip the behavior you know i mean i kept it going okay right
within myself so it's
like yes i did some bullying things do i regret it i do i'm sorry but it's not
that man man get out
of here it's not that type of bullying it's not something that you got to be
sitting up here grieving
about like nah it's it's it's fun and games it's practical jokes that's not
bullying i'll say
practical jokes so that's what you are you got all right okay that's what that's
what i have a third
apology bobby lee is a goddamn prankster i'm a prankster yeah i have a third
apology okay what's the third
did i
did i yeah go on and say it you know did i do what did i hug you for too long
i don't know if you want to consider the thing every time i would see dog you
hug everybody too
goddamn long that was your thing i know but you you know why because i think
you knew that it
embarrassed me and it like irritated me and you would do it and i would just
try to laugh
it off you know i would go Bobby that's how long how long do you think i would
hug you for
like that if you would count the seconds longer than a big red commercial
yeah like a minute yeah hot hot man so it's so fun to do to hug people for like
a minute or two
a minute or two man it's it's and then after about 45 seconds i could feel you
trying to get out and then what i do i do under hooks yeah you do the underhooks
yeah yeah yeah
and then you use your goddamn wrestling techniques from school yeah yeah yeah
you're
fucking this guy is man this guy is something else man yeah yeah yeah so now
those are the three
things that i wanted to apologize and i do accept my apology uh let me think
about it bro because uh
hey there's a tear right there okay yeah no you know what Bobby i'm gonna let
that go i'm gonna
go ahead and forgive you now let me ask you this then what's that um are there
things that
you're you have resentments toward you do you have resentments toward me and i
want i'd like to hear
them resentment towards you yes so we can resolve anything is there anything
hidden that i'm not
aware of or privy to that you the only thing that i've ever here we go i'm
trying to think like the
only thing that i ever but this is something that i i did it's not even like
anger it's just it was more
of like disappointment uh oh you know what i'm saying and it's like you know
because it's the comedy
story so when you're a comic you're like oh i want to get out and do as much
time so i was always
thought that for some reason i had this belief that i said man bobby gonna
start taking me out more
i'm gonna do more i'm gonna do more shows blah blah blah and it never happened
like that and i was
like so it was like oh i but i did that with a lot of people it's not just you
i just like well
maybe this person or maybe this person so it was like i'll be brutally honest
with you yeah okay
it's um how do i say this
the growth that i saw you as an opener i i mean you're hilarious there's just
something about you
up there that like i've always felt that too i've always said that about you
okay did i not yeah yeah
you've always said yeah i feel like you're being don't don't be defensive i'm
not gonna hurt you
no no but what happens is number one um i don't i didn't think that you could
do the 30 minutes
okay at the time right right and number two um i just prefer female openers
you know i used a lot of female features like jade and sarah tiana but you used
other guy