Name: Tito Cheeto is Back! | Ep 160 ft. Ryan Sickler | Bad Friends
Uploaded: 2023-04-03T16:00:33.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Tito Cheeto is Back! | Ep 160 ft. Ryan Sickler | Bad Friends' from Bad Friends on Comedy Buff. Published 2023-04-03. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Tito Cheeto is Back! | Ep 160 ft. Ryan Sickler | Bad Friends' from Bad Friends on Comedy Buff. Published 2023-04-03. Transcript available.

Tito Cheeto is Back! | Ep 160 ft. Ryan Sickler | Bad Friends

you two are bad friends who are these two idiots white dude and an asian dude
you two are disgusting
you two are something we're bad friends welcome back from australia oh my god
who are you
andrew santino's back i haven't seen you so long i haven't seen you in so long
i'm andrew
james santino that's your middle name andrew james santino oh you've known me
for 12 years
the guy doesn't know my fucking middle name what's my middle name gong see that's
what i'm saying
well it's not gong no it's not yeah yeah it's robert uh i do know what it is it's
um
oh robert robert raman lee is it robert raman lee no udon udon robert udon lee
dude yeah and we have
in the studio with us today sick dog one of my favorite people uh who's in the
studio ryan
sickler's here today clap right now everybody's laughing sickler back pain sickler
wait what is
your middle name bro scott scott i love it white name that's very white my
middle name is young
young no y-o-u-n-g like i'm young and old young robert young yee lee robert
young lee dude are you
named after robert e lee he is robert redford man you're you're a direct
descendant of robert
no my dad loved robert redford and steven um steve mcqueen and my brother steve
mcqueen and i'm robert
redford are you really yeah what color is robert redford's hair your hair yeah
have you ever met
robert redford no is he still alive he's still alive right yeah i went to sundance
uh this is in the late
90s you're gonna like this sundance is his that's his thing right yeah and uh i
go up my friend tracy
to see her brother's film and we go out to one you know it's not all in one
location so we go out to
this one remote area to see this film there's a few of them there and robert
redford's there right
and these people are asking him for his autograph and he's just saying no i don't
i'm not going to
give autographs but i'll give you tickets to any show you want to see and this
guy comes up to him
like hey can i get your autograph he's like again i'm not giving autographs but
i'll give you tickets
to any show you want to see and he goes well you dropped your credit card and i
got it and on the
back of that credit card is your signature and i really want your autograph he's
like i'm not gonna
give you my autograph i'll just give you tickets he's like i'm gonna keep your
credit card
and he's like okay and he did he kept robert redford's credit card he had to go
cancel that
no really he that's he refused yeah i like that guy that's who which which how
smart is that i like
the guy that kept the card yeah i like that guy i never thought i like oh yeah
you're you're i don't
sign the back if you sign the back your credit card no i've never even i don't
never signed anything
he doesn't know where credit cards are i don't know what signing is i don't
know where would you
sign in the front where the numbers are yeah you sign right over the number oh
i don't know right on
top with one of those sharpies yeah sharpie yeah that's what i'll do b lee on
the front dude i saw
first of all welcome back from australia all right first of all say it listen
when you were gone
you missed me held down you missed me i don't say you missed you i love you and
you're my friend
i missed you you look like you lost some weight i have not even eating i know
you look like you
lost some weight yeah okay thank you just not put the hand up at me what i'm
back look at what i'm
smiling at me spock it dude spock it up okay don't spock me so i fucking did an
all korean episode
loved i did it all mexican i did a bunch of shit when you're no longer allowed
to do movies
okay it's enough i did borderlands i was gone for two months right yeah you did
this one you're
right efron right no more movies efron and john cena okay and i just got
offered another movie today
no yeah just got offered another one are you gonna say yeah well let me tell
you who's in it oh brad
pitt oh my fucking god george clooney you ready for the last one you ready margot
robbie and me
wow those three and me you're the valet in this movie
can i have your keys first of all the line is are the keys in the car no how
many lines is that is
the car still running i don't know the line really no there's not a movie okay
okay thank you
but the look in his eyes dude it's just for that for the moment of him panicking
no i want you to work dude i'm just saying that like panicking like because
that movie's gonna be
shot in new zealand and i have to do five more without you i know i'm not doing
that i'm back
baby i'm back and we're going on tour and who hasn't promoted the tour you god
it's insane oh my god
we're doing we're doing we're doing 30 some odd cities i called you and i told
you there's an over
under in comedy right now on how many cities you all actually make 14 we're
going to all them we're
going to all them and the first one is going to be vancouver that's this week
and then we go to
oklahoma city then we do st louis kansas city i mean we're everywhere
everywhere you gotta go you
gotta come see you gotta come we got such a great show plan and we're on a bus
and i can't wait to
be on the bus with my boy but let me tell you about some of my experiences in
australia real quick
because i had such a fun time and i want to fill you in did i eat kangaroo with
john cena and drink
guinness yeah you better believe it you better i kangaroo what part of the kangaroo
is that like
deer it tastes dude exactly it's all muscle it's gamey it's super gamey no no
no but honestly you
never eat animals that hop you never eat animals yeah that's a korean proverb
that's why you don't eat
frogs and shit wait bunnies what about rabbits what about rabbits we don't eat
rabbits dude they hop
there's a korean song santoki it's about the fucking rabbit this is real yeah santoki
toki
oh yeah i mean it's about the fucking yeah dude in fact in fact let me see this
is the truth right
during the korean war the north the communists they wouldn't get shot if they
hopped
no no i swear to god all you have to do is hop and the other koreans would be
like no don't you
okay okay yeah kangaroo oh yeah yeah yeah yeah it's an old fucking thing right
what's so funny
don't eat things that hop we don't eat things that hop so don't what else
rabbits
kangaroos rabbits rabbit frogs cats cats cats kind of hot gay people
gay people you can't eat them either you can't eat them right who else who else
what else
stops um oh somebody with one leg yeah he's hopping he's hopping for sure you
know he's
hopping yeah i guess that's a good korean proverb it's a great one but yes i
did i did have kangaroo
and it was very very good i liked it a lot of people don't like it but i i
liked it do you
quality you fucking bastard first of all dude let me inform you guy who's uninformed
i at first i
thought should i feel bad about eating this i looked it up statistics three to
one three to one kangaroo
to people in australia they can't wait to get rid of those things they're you
know when you're like
i can't wait to see one then you see 40 000 you're like these things get them
out of here
no really they're everywhere you gotta be kidding me they're everywhere dude so
they're like cats
where where are cats all over what are you talking about you know those islands
we're like see what
world he lives in yeah no i saw a documentary where there is an island cat
island yeah yeah like in
japan or whatever is there such thing as cat island carlos yeah it's an island
in uh japanese island
yeah yeah but that's because the japanese did that because they like cute i don't
know man island
of a kitty they love that they made that that didn't that didn't that was every
we put them on
island and coffee shop
they charge people you know i mean they have one here in la no that's a cat
cafe that's a cat cafe yeah
have you paid have you paid i paid for going in la your house is i have three
cats but i still paid
to go to that so stupid that's so dumb the coffee's great isn't that good no in
in australia they're
all over the place and and i went to go see a tasmanian devil and by the way i
learned why they call
them tasmanian devils they're ugly as shit these fucking things they're so ugly
yeah but when these
when the english people came down there to pick out where they were going to
drop off their prisoners
because it was in tasmania at port arthur which is the biggest the first penal
colony
by the way the british how stupid are these people they want to dump off their
criminals
in a place that's supposed to be like treacherous and around the world tasmania
one of the prettiest
fucking places i've ever seen wow great weather down there so the brits are in
shitty rain gloomy
weather and they're like i don't teach them to fucking prisoners and they left
them on a beautiful island
it was it's stunning it's so pretty but when you drop off prisoners on an
island yeah what do you do
to the prisoners no what do the prisoners do party they party though it was
open air prisons by the
way so it was just like um coachella it was coachella it was coachella yeah
yeah it was basically
coachella you know what i mean that's what it was but then do they build houses
and stuff i don't know
yeah they built the life down there yeah and now it's a fully functioning
society it's incredible no
but they but the tasmanian devil is called that because when the brits came
down there
they the when they're young and they are i mean not just when they're young but
when they're in
breeding when they're in breeding they make this noise it's unmistakable it's
so creepy you hear it
it's like it's so weird whoa and they do this heavily at night too when they're
breeding so the
british came at night on boats and they would go onto this wooded island and
all they heard was
echoing in the woods i'd be so scared well dude they thought it was ghosts and
witches and they were like
it's ghosts and evil spirits so that's why they were like put the fucking
criminals with the ghost
and the evil spirits they're these little tiny bullshit animals they're this
bit they're little
tiny yeah although they will you up they can bite so you saw one yeah i saw a
guy i saw a guy um he fed
one of the handlers like fed it you know like uh roadkill and he fed it in
front of everyone and
said the jock is so strong it can break through human bone okay i was gonna ask
you raccoon or tasmanian
but now i know tasmanian uh honey badger honey badger right what would be what
would win honey
badger or tasmanian devil if tasmanian got the if it got its mouth on it honey
badger no no no yeah
yeah yeah if the tasmanian got its mouth on tasmanian can't kill snake that's
another
korean for proverb sing that song it's not a song it's a proverb sing the song
all right
tasmania can't kill snake oh no do it do it in korean
i don't even know the english no no no i only know the english version right
yeah with the broken accent that's the thing he does the english version yeah
yeah frank sinatra did a english version oh he did yeah
tasmania don't eat snake yeah
his frank sinatra one of the best i've ever heard ever
it was terrible baby blue eyes yeah baby blue eyes yeah it was terrible i tried
that
no but they're tiny and they're but they're little vicious assholes but i'm
telling you the jaw
the strength of them is insane he can look it up at some they can literally
break through your
femur they could bite and crack your leg in half uh-huh so so can you can you
have one as a pet
you would never you why why well can can you have an alligator as a pet but you
know what yeah you
would never though but let me i'm saying you could have anything but can i say
something though can i
say something if you live in dubai no no how about that if you're one of those
guys where they have
tigers that roam around their castle i'm gonna say something controversial give
it but tasmanian
is a living species right right and so they might have the same ailments that
some human beings have
like diabetes even worse what like a