Name: One Million Subscribers & Happy Birthday Andrew | Ep 188 | Bad Friends
Uploaded: 2023-10-16T16:00:11.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'One Million Subscribers & Happy Birthday Andrew | Ep 188 | Bad Friends' from Bad Friends on Comedy Buff. Published 2023-10-16. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'One Million Subscribers & Happy Birthday Andrew | Ep 188 | Bad Friends' from Bad Friends on Comedy Buff. Published 2023-10-16. Transcript available.

One Million Subscribers & Happy Birthday Andrew | Ep 188 | Bad Friends

hello hello hello i'm thomas b jefferson the adams the third and i'm william randolph's
guest on
yes the first the first we're coming to washington dc we're coming to washington
dc
this weekend 21st here we're gonna be here in dc this weekend you gotta come
out and see the boys
go to badfriendspod.com next weekend we're in denver then milwaukee chicago minneapolis
and
then madison with this weekend washington dc come to washington dc come respect
your forefathers
go to badfriendspod.com badfriendspod.com badfriendspod.com you two are bad
friends who are
these two idiots a white dude and an asian dude you two are disgusting well you
two are something
we're bad friends happy birthday to you my friend happy birthday to me i have
two presents i have one
coming in the mail it hasn't come yet but i got you one gift sushi well open it
okay are you gonna be
real i hope it's sushi it's not come on oh dude what is it happy birthday buddy
what did you get me for
my birthday did you get me anything yeah i got you that's a lie no i literally
got you one oh wow
you don't like it wow who told you to get this no one you liar a brand new new
pro x3 pro x3 something
something a brand new rangefinder for the golf course this is so nice yeah it's
a nice one huh did you
open it up why is it not ran i don't know why they sent it me that way so it's
been used you bought a
used right no i swear to god i didn't you bought me a used for my birthday i
think it's right straight
from the fucking rangefinder place is this wish.com no i got it from i'll give
you my receipt i don't
know why i came that way this is so cool this is like the one of the best
models i know i got you it
i have another thing better even coming even better than this yeah really
believe it yeah wow i can't
even believe that this is real right yeah i feel like this is a scam it's going
to explode happy birthday
dude thank you dude i love because you know i've never given you anything that's
right and um there
was a sense of guilt there shouldn't shame and uh this is so nice yeah and i
and i did some research
you did yeah i've never researched it and i usually get like standard shit yeah
starbucks card you know
what i mean nothing nothing is the most yeah it's my favorite gift to give is
nothing brand new nothing
from the factory i gotta tell you sometimes a brand new nothing is incredible
it's incredible dude and
can i say yeah best gift i've gotten in years are you being real i swear to god
you wait for the
second one though you're gonna love it okay okay mine okay let's see what it is
oh i'm excited for
this and by the way in the meantime we're celebrating our one million
subscriber
can i just say though this that's my golden chicken you got me a golden chicken
is that the
fake is it like a toy no it's real it's real it's a real chicken leg dude right
this is from kentucky fried
chicken jollybee oh no the jolly yeah jolly wait he got you a jollybee i did i
didn't cook this okay
why did you have to touch it why did you have to touch it i have clean hands oh
happy birthday dude thank
you dude yeah oh so good i'm i'm i'm i'm i'm i'm so good you think i'm just
gonna eat oh you came in
with one single piece of chicken where was this transported inside of a bucket
where's the bucket
there get the bucket get the bucket we don't trust we don't trust it just
before wait wait wait let me
say something there's more than one chicken finger in the bucket he gets one
whoa give him the bucket
give me the bucket okay let me just be honest i didn't give you a gift yeah i
know no shit oh my
god oh my god how dumb do you think i am this was for the filipino american
ones
that's how i feel that's how i feel about filipino clean it up macone right now
yeah get in here and
pick up the chicken off the floor i didn't first of all vote for it i would
have checked no on it
insane insane dude that you that you didn't get me a gift and then you brought
me uh and then you
brought me a fake a fake offering it was a fake a fake offer dude what's in
your purse i have to
sanitize me too why do you have to sanitize what were you doing just before
yeah what was wrong
it's jolly dude you have to sanitize it i mean look at how greasy my fingers
are i didn't even
eat it look at my hands yeah they're shining can is the light bouncing off of
them just throw me
the hand sanitizer it was a jules jules it's embarrassing it literally hit me
in the hands
i couldn't what is that jollybee napkins come on yeah i'll take that what
company is it from
those are fine happy filipino american yeah yeah wait well i bought filipinos
now
mugs oh you really did oh you did where hold on mccone please get them so she's
running out of
the room this is insane you could have sat in your chair the whole time we
could have had someone do
why do we hire these people to be at the studio if they're not going to do work
oh so what i thought
we're doing the one million celebration episode well it was kind of my birthday
but kind of not at
all yeah look at this oh whoa okay here we go oh wow oh wow i'll introduce it
wait so wait a
minute let me make something clear my best friend on earth bobby lee gave me an
incredible gift for my
birthday which i am genuinely very appreciative of did not get a gift from you
or you or you did i
did i also can i just say this too wow on my birthday we did a fucking we did a
thing yeah bad
friends bobby lee birthday thing right nothing for my friend here nothing for
me he's my sidekick is
that what i get i did talk to uh your wife about what i should get you etc so
and so it's on the way we're
good it's on the way his gift bobby's just here no but he has another one on
the way okay even better
he has more to come you have zero here my birthday's like hanukkah every day
you get one every day you
get one for the week i'm offended honestly i'm mad at all three of you yeah it's
it's disgraceful it's
disgusting what oh okay so these are my favorite i want to take a minute to say
a million subscribers
on youtube okay happy birthday subscribers on youtube we want to thank the fans
so very much
for being here for a million this is incredible we were this is such a pinnacle
it's a pinnacle
in fact i i had to two i ran into a guy today who said to me and i mean this
and we do really love the
fans we appreciate you guys so much it's been incredible the show boston was
unbelievable immense
it's been so cool and i will say this about a fan he came up to me and he goes
i'm a i'm a patreon
i'm a subscriber of the patreon and he goes i gotta tell you i'm a little bummed
because i get excited
for mondays but now i see the episodes on friday and now i feel empty on monday
and i said so should
we do an extra special one for him every monday just for that guy yeah okay his
name is michael nilk
nilk michael nilk nilk okay let's see some of this filipino american food you've
got for us
forgetting my birthday okay so these were my favorite snacks in the philippines
growing up growing up
okay pull one at a time just a bag of live bugs we're just gonna eat live bugs
okay first one
cheese ring cheese ring okay are they onion ring are they like no funyuns funyuns
because i know you
got like let us open them i know what funyun is the onion rings forget it okay
okay try this yeah
please open it let's let's look at the package let's rank them let's rank them
well let's look at the
packaging and rank it first of all that is that japanese it seems japanese it
seems japanese and and
there's a swedish girl in the fucking there's a swedish and from sweden i don't
know why is she so
white let's just tell cheese flavored snack it's the best yeah you know what
they look like i mean
why is it so puffed up i don't know okay okay well how does it smell well first
okay first smell
first smell uh a foot comes to mind that's a foot that's your favorite food as
a kid is it mongoose
toenail flavor that's what it smells like mongoose toenail flavor that is so
gross i can't eat it we
have to we don't have it now we have to try one yeah we can spit it out of the
bag look it's like a
fucking it's a little a prolapsed anus it's donald trump's ass hole look at
that it's a little
donald trump's ass hole that's a donald trump prolapsed anus and we're gonna
eat it live on the show
yeah okay here we go try one
he likes it he actually likes it bro when it comes to taste and smell let me
see completely different okay
so the smell is atrocious yeah don't smell it okay i'll just hold my nose
fantastic yeah it's pretty good yeah it's pretty good it's pretty good don't
throw it away i'll keep
it this is just like the philippines don't smell it you don't just enjoy it i've
had kalilah i never
smelled her pussy just enjoy it i just ate it really because if you smelled it
you want you're out you
won't want it these are really good but when you taste it it's like cheesy wow
all right next
you might get diarrhea but that's okay we might get diarrhea though yeah okay
next one piatos the
sour cream and onion they're just chips yeah right yes okay yeah piatos piatos
by the way the company
is made by jack and jill uh flavored potato chips okay smell it first
again dude let me smell first oh my god again it's like footy feet feet feet
feet feet feet feet
oh my god that's even worse than the other one dude are we gonna get sick is
this gonna make
us sick yeah maybe okay great great yeah this is like a samoan armpit oh have
you ever smelled
a samoan armpit of course yeah i've been to the island yeah it's like i don't
know let's try one you
have to try one now also can i also visually yeah really pad really bad what
this is terrible no design
what does that whatsoever you know they're like what shape do you even call
this
a pentagon a pentaron a pentaron yeah this is a pentaron yeah let me taste it
see let's see if it give
it a whirl
is it good you seem like you're still in the middle of judging if it's good
because the aftertaste means
a lot in this kind of stuff because i still have it visually so i'm trying to
get that rid of my mind
it's okay okay it's not bad it's okay it's not bad right out of ten well the
first one i'm gonna
give three i'm gonna give this a six six yeah okay out of ten it's average it's
like been there done
that cardboardy yeah yeah cardboardy this tastes like what i think a rainbow
sandal would taste like
yeah yeah after like a after like a san diego bro war right three or four years
exactly with a little
bit of beach sweat a little bit of sand in your toes this is not good this one's
a three yeah and
and you're and and that three is generous it's pretty generous okay this one is
the best okay the
second best okay pillows pillows pillows how amazing they just name everything
things they wish they had
what a random thing right she's like next up is blankets and yeah this one's
called lamp fixtures
have you guys tried electricity
all right here's pillows a better bag a better design i like this kind of
a heavy you don't i mean a heavy rip and pillows is a ube filled cracker oh
smell it first
oh really i like it i like the smell of ube is good for me baby oh this is like
that's top notch
you can tell by the packaging it's higher end let's see let's eat yeah we must
test yeah yeah
three out of ten six out of ten okay let's look at the right it's a square i've
never seen something so
purple
what are we talking the pillow we said the sound of the crunch is very good
high-end crunch i don't like it you hate it let me try i don't like it i don't
like it wow
all right let me try a pillow there's something inside of it i know i tasted it
i don't like you
know what this looks like it reminds me of uh what's that the cereal the
the shit cereal wheat thin or whatever the shit cereal was it looks like that
what's inside ube juice is inside yeah yeah you don't like there's something
about it i don't like
yeah because it's like it's like perfume in a in a in a chip or something i
didn't want
perfume in the chip yeah yeah you ju