Name: Yabba Dabba Dr. Phil | Ep 199 ft. Adam Ray | Bad Friends
Uploaded: 2024-01-01T17:00:39.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Yabba Dabba Dr. Phil | Ep 199 ft. Adam Ray | Bad Friends' from Bad Friends on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-01-01. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Yabba Dabba Dr. Phil | Ep 199 ft. Adam Ray | Bad Friends' from Bad Friends on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-01-01. Transcript available.

Yabba Dabba Dr. Phil | Ep 199 ft. Adam Ray | Bad Friends

- Happy New Year!
- Thanksgiving!
- No, dude, it's just the new year.
- And welcome to the, we've got tour dates.
- Welcome to the, we've got tour dates.
- Welcome to it.
- We're gonna be in Atlantic City.
- New Jersey, Salt Lake City, Utah.
- Temecula, California.
- Reno, Nevada.
- Sacramento.
- Long Beach, California, Windsor.
- Ontario, Canada.
- Niagara Falls, Canada.
- Tucson, Arizona.
- And we finished the tour 420 in.
- Las Vegas, I can't wait for that.
- Viva Las Vegas!
- Go to badfriendspod.com for tickets,
badfriendspod.com.
- You two are bad friends.
- Who are these two idiots?
- A white dude and an Asian dude.
You two are disgusting.
- Well, you two are something.
- We're bad friends.
- Happy New Year!
- Happy New Year, Happy New Year.
- It's 2024.
Happy New Year to all the bad friends.
What a year we've had.
- What a year we've had.
What a year we've had.
- Take that out of your mouth.
- Why?
- What did we learn over the weekend?
We learned that Bobby and I are both Year of the Pig.
If we want to talk about our birth years.
- Yep.
- He's a golden pig.
- I'm a golden pig.
And I'm a?
- Water pig.
- I'm a little water pig.
- Water pig.
- You're a water pig.
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
- I don't know what a pig,
what does a pig sound like in water?
- Huh?
- Hypopotamus.
- Hypopotamus.
- Hypopotamus.
- That's actually very smart.
- Rosie O'Donnell's a water pig too.
- Okay.
- Her birth year.
- Oh, okay.
Yeah, that makes sense.
- I'm a water pig.
- Oh.
- Yeah.
- Rest in peace.
- She's not dead.
- Oh, I know.
- Is she?
- No, but I saw her there and I thought she was cool.
- We're gonna kill her.
You know on the show.
We say someone's name.
- Oh, sorry.
No, no, no.
I want her to live.
You guys, Happy New Year.
Congratulations to everyone for surviving over the year.
And let me say something right now, man.
What a beautiful 2024 we got ahead of us.
- We got some stuff lined up.
- Yeah.
What are your resolutions?
- My resolutions are to get off of cholesterol medication.
I'm gonna get in good enough heart health shape
so I don't have to take cholesterol medication.
That would include not doing this podcast anymore.
- Happy New Year, guys.
- Uh, what?
- I have no idea.
- Sorry?
- Excuse me?
- Can I help you?
- Yeah.
Oh, this isn't the intervention for the fuck that guy part.
No, I'm sorry.
My agent told me that I was doing a podcast today
and she said improvise as much as possible.
- Yeah.
- So I wanted to come in hot, you know,
no pun intended, brought a nice coffee.
- You sure did.
- But I also brought a mindset.
- Well, you're Jeremiah Watkins at the beginning.
- Was it?
- You came in too hot.
- Came in too hot, yeah.
- Oh, is he known for doing that?
- Yes.
- Well.
- Way too hot.
- Is that what he's known for?
- Dr. Phil, do you want to put on your headphones
that way you can hear us?
- Always.
I want to hear and feel everything you guys are doing
because I've been watching from afar
and it's nice to see it up close.
- Never used headphones there before, Dr. Phil?
- Dr. Phil.
Can somebody help Dr. Phil, please?
- Will.
- I do think it's important for us to celebrate
what we've created.
- Oh.
- Bob, you can go first.
- Oh, yeah.
- Yeah, 2024 is around the corner.
What did 2023 bring to you?
And then I'll get to you, Andrew.
- Oh, okay.
- Oh, well, I just, you know, my enemy,
I said no to my enemy and I put him in his tracks
and the enemy is called ice cream.
- You're not going to stop eating ice cream.
- My enemy is called ice cream.
- I thought you were going to say like Jackie Chan.
- No, not Jackie Chan, no, man.
He's a good guy.
I'm a good guy.
- For sure, but I still would love to see you fight to the death.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Jackie, me and Jackie?
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- Over a bowl of mint chocolate chip.
Well, that's cool.
Congrats.
- Are you really trying to quit ice cream for real?
- Yeah.
- You are.
- Yeah, because you know all my-
- You know what I'm going to do now?
- Uh-oh.
- I'm sending gallons of McConnell's ice cream
to your front door for the next month straight.
- To tempt me?
- Yeah.
- Okay.
- It's going to be out there, baby.
- Yeah, it's just going to melt out there.
Sticky river.
- A little sticky river.
He's going to want to slide down in that steep driveway.
And at the bottom of that,
I'm going to put up one of those little like kiddie pools.
It's just going to slowly fill up with melted ice cream.
So every time you back out of your car,
how are you going to resist to get out?
- What flavor?
If you get the flavor right, then maybe it's going to be bad.
- Buddy, I'm going to do all of them.
You're not going to get one flavor.
It's going to be like a suicide from a fountain drink.
- But let me say something.
- Yeah.
- I've questioned our friendship.
And I don't think that you know me a lot.
I don't think you know me.
So I want to ask you what kind of ice cream
would I be tempted to eat?
- Good question.
- Thank you so much, doctor.
And if you get that right, dude, we're besties.
If you get it wrong, we have a long way to go, my friend.
- Well, no, there should be a real bet here.
If he gets it wrong, something should have to happen to him.
- Like what?
- I don't know.
Maybe he gets punched in the taint.
- Dr. Phil, is this how you solve shit on your show?
- Yeah.
- No, but I'm not on my show, Andy.
- Right.
You're on my show.
- Correct.
- So shut the fuck up.
- Whoa.
- How does that feel, Dr. Phil?
- You know what it feels?
Can I be honest?
It feels good.
- He does?
- He likes to be talked to like that.
- I do, eh?
- Yeah.
- I make my wife wear a mask of me
just to know what it's like to go fuck myself.
- Wow.
- Wow, doctor.
- Wow, wow, wow.
- So you were saying about your favorite creamery.
- We can tell what your favorite kind of ice cream is.
- Yeah.
- Do you know what it is?
- Yeah.
- Oh, give me.
Okay, go ahead.
- I bet I know.
- What is it?
- Well, here's the hard part.
- That's why.
- Because you're not, no, I do know you well,
but you're not shy when it comes to indulgence.
It's not like one is your ultimate.
You eat a lot.
- I have five that I like.
If you can name one of the five.
- Well, Rocky Road for sure is one.
- That's not my number one.
- I know that's it.
- I know.
- Well, then why did you even.
- Whoa.
- I was going to say sugar-free Red Bull.
- They don't make ice cream, Dr. Phil.
- They don't make ice cream like that.
- Not with that attitude.
- Oh, you're right.
- We want that to happen.
- That's actually true.
- Yeah, yeah, we want it to happen.
You're manifesting it.
- He is.
- Let me ask you something.
When you moved out of your house,
how come they had machine guns on the fucking wall?
- What's up with that?
- Yeah.
- Yeah, I mean, you know.
Do you see that, his house?
Was that his house?
- Yeah, look at Dr. Phil's house online.
What's the deal, dude?
When you moved out, what was this about?
You just load up AK-40 stuff.
- Yeah, yeah.
What is that all about, guys?
- Well, to be fair,
I've never seen this picture before.
But I will tell you this much.
- Yeah.
- I have so many rooms in my house.
I've got an arcade.
I've got a room that's just filled with bidets.
So you have one of those shitty days, literally.
- Right, yeah.
- And you just want to pop around to each fucking hose
and let them just, you know, go to town.
But the gun room came into play
when I saw the new Grand Theft Auto came out.
And then I had also seen a Mission Impossible movie
and had a couple of run-ins at the local Rite Aid
where I was like, I wish I was packing.
So, built a room, hung up some memorabilia.
- Uh-huh.
- Can you zoom in on that?
I mean, that's an astonishing,
it's also in your dining room.
- Look at the toys, too.
- Yeah.
- To the left.
- The last one's favorite part is all the added on.
- Are you a big Murakami fan?
- Oh, Murakami, Muragumi.
- Oh, right.
- I, uh, what is it, uh, Tiramisu?
- Tiramisu, no, the origami, origami.
- So you've got on that wall, from what we can see,
there's a hand, about five or six assault rifles?
- Yeah, imagine being an Uber Eats driver
and getting my order wrong
and still having the nerve to show up.
- Imagine me walking you into that room and going,
- Right.
- Maybe next time you don't forget the Mac salad.
- You honestly would invite an Uber Eats guy
into your house?
- Hey, I'm trying to play a cool and toy.
- No, I didn't know you were that kind of guy.
I'm realizing how humble and cool you are.
- Yeah, I mean, I try to relate.
It's, you get to a certain level and you guys are, are, are, are in it right
now.
You know, where the, where the tide is changing.
You're jumping out into the ocean with not just a surfboard, but a game plan.
- Uh, what the fuck are you talking about?
- I have no idea what he's talking about.
- Jesse, no, you can tell him what I'm saying.
- Yeah, you say your, your guys' fame is Dr. Phil level fame.
- Oh. - Oh.
- Wow.
- What's this relationship about?
How do you know Dr. Phil?
- I just watch a lot.
- Facebook, yeah.
- Well, I follow you on Facebook.
- You do?
- You do?
- I follow about 16 people on Facebook.
- Yeah.
- Dave Coulier.
- Yeah.
- Uh, Jess.
- Uh-huh.
- Um, shit.
Tony Robbins is, uh.
- Of course.
- Agent.
- Let me guess.
Um, Teapak Chopra.
- Teapak Chopra.
- Fuck yeah.
- Gary V.
- Gary V.
- Gary V.
- Gary V.
- Uh.
- The situation.
- The situation.
- Yeah, gotta be the situation.
- Um, Papa John, just 'cause I love a good racist rant from time to time.
- Oh, right, right.
- I know, I know.
- Mike Lindell.
- Boom.
- What a funny guy.
- Yeah.
- He is hilarious.
- Hilarious.
- Yeah.
- Good, yeah.
- Is that all the people?
That's it?
- There's three or four more in there.
- Yeah, yeah.
- What about Marlo Cyrus, the other Miley Cyrus' unknown sister?
- Yep, and then there's a guy that looks like Billy Eilish
that works at Trader Joe's.
- Oh, William Eilish.
- Yep.
- I know him, yeah.
- And then, um, uh, Billy.
- Billy Billy, as we call him.
- And then, um.
- Billy Joe Armstrong from Green Day?
- Yep, I follow him.
- Billy Joel.
- Yep, and then Billy Joel.
- Billy Joel, the actual Billy Joel.
- No, there's an actor who plays, uh.
- Billy Joel.
- Yep, he's a stunt guy, I guess.
- Right, right, right.
- Sometimes Billy Joel falls off stage from playing piano,
so there's a guy that comes out.
And then Obama's fan page I follow.
- Oh, good.
- Oh, that's nice.
- 'Cause if you didn't say that,
'cause they were all pretty much white.
- They were all white.
- Except for Indian, Deepak.
- Oh no, he's white.
- Oh, he is pretty white.
- Very tan.
- Very tan, very tan, very tan.
- That's a Scooby-Doo situation.
- Really?
- Oh, you'll pull back.
- Did you read his books?
- Scooby-Doo?
- No, Deepak Chopra.
Yeah, Scooby-Doo has a couple.
What was this?
What's it?
- Oh my God.
- Wrong dog.
- Wrong dog?
Oh, is that the wrong dog?
- Wrong dog.
- Oh, wait.
- What was I even doing?
- I didn't know what, see,
I started doing the Scooby-Doo,
but then I forgot what.
- You did Fred Flintstone.
- Fred Flintstone.
- I forgot what he says,
so I was gonna go,
"Rah-ba-dah-ba-doo."
- Oh my God.
There's not enough space in my heart.
- Sorry, that is.
- So bad.
- That's my bit to do.
- What?
"Rah-ba-dah-ba-doo?"
- That's my bit.
- Oh, I stole your bit?
- How dare you?
- You don't "Rah-ba-dah-ba-doo," dude.
That's me.
- Easy.
- You better know better.
- Sorry about that.
- Is that what you sound like?
That's not Scooby-Doo.
That's like Scooby-Doo's nemesis, "Rah-dog."
- Oh.
- Oh.
- A less popular cartoon for some reason.
- Yeah, "Rah-dog."
- Can you imagine a true animated series called "Rah-dog?"
- "Rah-dog."
- It's like a crime-fighting, crime-solving dog.
- And his arch-nemesis is a condom.
- Oh, yeah, okay.
- Just a big, like, just a big--
- Dr. Condom.
- Just a truck.
- Dr. Condom.
- Dr. Condom.
- That's King Koopa for Mario Brothers.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- Dr. Condom.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- "I'm gonna cover you up."
- "No!"
- Yeah, and "Rah-dog's like, I gotta,
I'm trying to fuck shit up in this city."
- Wait, w