Name: Bobbi Althoff Hates Us | Ep 210 | Bad Friends
Uploaded: 2024-03-18T16:00:05.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Bobbi Althoff Hates Us | Ep 210 | Bad Friends' from Bad Friends on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-03-18. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Bobbi Althoff Hates Us | Ep 210 | Bad Friends' from Bad Friends on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-03-18. Transcript available.

Bobbi Althoff Hates Us | Ep 210 | Bad Friends

Hey, the last leg of our tour, and these are going to be our best shows.
These are. We're in Windsor, Ontario, Canada.
Windsor, Ontario, Ontario.
Niagara Falls.
Ontario, no problem.
Tucson, Arizona.
Arizona.
And then we finish on 420 in the United States and Las Vegas, Las Vegas, Nevada.
But we added Abu Dhabi.
We're coming to the United Arab Emirates.
At the Etihad Arena.
Etihad Arena, May 21st.
We can fill the Etihad Arena.
Let's hope so.
Go to badfriendspod.com for those tickets.
Badfriendspod.com.
We also got new merch.
We got new tickets.
That's the Beastie Boys.
Show them, kiddo.
I love it.
These sweatshirts with the Beastie Boys.
The Fear and Loathing shirt.
Go to badfriendsmerch.com.
Badfriendsmerch.com.
I'm doing six dates.
Andrew Santino's doing six dates to run my new hour in the club.
October 4th, I'm doing cobs.
He's doing cobs.
I'm doing six clubs.
Yeah, October 4th, I'm doing cobs.
I'm actually doing cobs.
Yeah, October 4th, I'm doing it.
I think I'm doing it in June.
But go to andrewsantino.com for those dates.
I'm doing Houston, Nashville, San Francisco, Tampa.
Go to andrewsantino.com for all of those dates.
See you soon.
You two are bad friends.
Who are these two idiots?
A white dude and an Asian dude.
You two are disgusting.
You two are something.
We're bad friends.
Her attitude's already stinky.
She has a stinky attitude already, dude.
You're telling me she stinks already?
Put the mic as close to her mouth.
I don't think she physically smells good, but I think her attitude is stinky.
Let's, what do you think the, what do you, what are you guys doing?
Don't, hand it to her nice, dude.
That's a celebrity, dude.
Is she?
Yeah, she is.
Oh, whoa, dude.
Do you have to wear these?
You don't have to.
No, but it helps you hear your own sound.
Don't do that.
Don't do that.
You don't want to fuck up your hair.
It's fine.
Don't do that here.
Then throw it down, or just put it wherever.
Just hold it.
Please hold it.
Thank you.
I love these slacks.
The buttons on the side are cool.
Is this, um...
Fashion?
What grandma's couch is this made out of?
I was waiting for that.
Well, they, I got you pants, by the way.
I got you a gift.
Where do you find those?
You don't buy those, but where do you find them?
I got you a gift for real, because I know you like fashion.
Oh, I got gifts.
No, you don't, dude.
I have a ring.
So non-thoughtful.
That's a ring that a fan gave you.
But you like Korean?
Korean what?
Korean rings.
What is that?
It's from the, that's ring is from the Korean.
From the war, Korean war.
Korean war.
Okay.
Yeah.
You know we had a war, right?
This is fun.
I got you a pants.
I got you a pants.
Yeah.
I got you pants.
Yeah.
You did?
Yeah, I got me.
You never got me pants.
You know what I got you?
If you say career, it's gonna really bother me, dude.
You said it.
No, that's what you feel.
I didn't say it.
You said it.
Yeah, I had one before.
Not great.
Yeah.
But I had one.
Oh, you know what?
It was a little-
It was a little-
It has really got in your head, my friend.
Ricky Snicky has really got into his head, dude.
Number one on Amazon.
Yeah, number one on Amazon.
I did get you a gift.
I did get you a gift.
These are for you.
These are pants.
What are they?
These are Yeezys.
Yeezy pants.
I bought you Yeezy pants.
I'm not kidding at all.
He saw.
They're Yeezy pants.
Go ahead and open them up so she can see.
Open them up for her so she can see.
Look at that.
Hold that up.
What do you think?
Thank you so much.
You like those?
I love them.
Those are vultures.
Those are Yeezy, so.
Why are they so big?
They're her size.
I don't think they are.
Pretty sure they are.
Are those for Mo Ammer?
Not that he's big, but I'm just saying.
Okay.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
What were you saying?
Your attitude right now is different.
Go ahead and introduce our guest.
Bobby Altoid.
That was so funny.
Ladies and gentlemen, it's Bobby Altof.
Altof.
Are you Jewish?
No.
Do you want to be?
What type of question is that?
That's a silly one, yeah.
You aren't Jewish?
No.
Are you sure?
I'm sure.
Have you done a 23andMe?
Do you know your history?
Yeah.
Your genetical makeup?
Do you think you might have owned,
your family might have-
Owned slaves?
Maybe.
Is that what you're going to ask?
Yeah, what do you think?
Bobby Altof is of Jewish descent.
She said she made being Jewish cool again.
Did you guys just make this up?
Yeah, we wrote all these articles yesterday
before you came in.
Interesting.
Yeah.
Why does it say I'm of Jewish descent?
Are you?
No.
What's the deal?
Why are you so adversely?
I'm just confused.
I did do 23andMe.
I'm not.
Can we stop looking me up or whatever you're doing?
I'd love to hear about your upbringing.
Oh, great.
May I ask some questions?
Sure.
Was there a lot of flowers?
Growing up, did you see wilderness?
Did you see nature?
What do you mean?
Like when you walked outside, did you see
birds?
What are you trying to get at?
I want to know if you lived in a city
or if you lived, grew up in the suburbs
or the farm.
Take it down.
Oh, you're right.
You think so?
Take it down just a little bit.
I don't know, dude.
She's provoking me, dude.
Too high right now.
All right.
Let me ask you another question.
I mean, the same question, but in a different way.
I want to keep it down.
Yeah, keep it down.
I keep it down.
Probably Altoid.
No.
Altof.
That was so funny.
The second time and the first time
are you going to see it again?
Look at her.
She's going.
She's ready for you.
Can you ask your question?
My work speaks for itself.
It does.
It does.
So, um,
Bobby.
Yes.
Do you not have a question?
It sounds like you don't have a question.
I do.
No, I do.
Did you grow up in the suburbs or the city?
Like, kind of on a farm a little bit.
Exactly.
That's what I thought.
Thank you.
Yeah, yeah.
So, your dad was a farmer?
No.
Okay.
It was just, I grew up on two acres.
One or two acres?
Two acres.
Okay.
I don't want to know the specifics,
but, um, is your dad a doctor?
No.
What does your dad do?
He builds houses.
Architect.
No, contractor.
Oh, contract.
My bad.
Yeah.
Handyman, contractor, architect.
Did your mother work?
Janitor, custodian.
President.
Fix-it boy.
Blue collar.
Not a collar at all, in fact.
Probably t-shirts, if I'm being honest.
No collar.
No collar.
No collars.
Did your mother work?
No.
What did she do?
She would be really mad if she heard me say that, though.
Oh.
Because she raised you.
She did.
And that's work.
And it's work.
A lot of work.
Uh.
I think a lot of work.
To raise her?
I think so.
Yeah.
To raise me or people in general?
Just me?
You specifically, yeah.
Is momming a job?
Of course.
What?
Well, you have that job, right?
I do.
Yeah.
Yeah, you're a mommy.
Why do you talk like that?
Did you feel like woke?
You said a mommy?
I can't believe people enjoy listening to you guys.
Oh, and vice versa.
Yeah.
If I may.
Yeah.
No, I'm kidding.
We know why you're popular.
We like you a lot.
We've considered you the third bad friend.
And we also are huge fans of yours.
And also, can I just say something?
You know, we normally probably wouldn't do other people's podcasts.
We generally try.
I do a lot.
I do a lot.
But.
You do everybody's.
I do everybody's.
But when you asked.
You and Mark Normand are in the race for who can be.
I know.
Hey, you'll do it.
Yeah, but when you asked, I was like, well, can I ask you a question, though?
Because you asked me way before, like six months before I actually did it.
So what the fuck happened?
You text me and you go, or you DM me, you're going, can you do my podcast?
I'm going to come over Friday.
Friday comes around.
You're a no-show.
And then I don't hear you from you for six months later.
It wasn't a no-show.
I said, I text you and said, sorry.
To me, that's no-shows.
That's not.
Okay.
You were a show.
I texted you.
You texted me.
I didn't just like ghost you.
I know, but it was an hour before.
Yeah.
An hour before.
Was it?
Yeah.
Before you came to my.
Yes.
An hour before you came to my, I was like, I'm not coming.
Do you want an apology?
No, I don't want to know what happened.
Tyga had to do it that day.
You got bumped for Tyga.
Can I, may I ask you a serious question?
Mm-hmm.
Who did better numbers?
I mean, the audio downloads.
I think Tyga did.
Tyga's audio downloads are going to be better than yours for sure.
Okay.
Go to click on her profile picture, her photo.
There you go.
Videos.
Yeah, videos.
Go down to Tyga.
All right.
So Bobby's at what?
What does it say?
1.8 million right there with his leg spread?
1.9.
1.9.
Thank you, Pete.
Where's Tyga?
Right there at five, five million.
Okay.
He wins.
Yeah.
He did.
That hurt so bad.
It was.
No, the whole thing hurt.
But the, but the, um, the TikTok views were pretty good for me.
Yeah.
I saw a clip.
It got like 55 million or something.
Yeah.
Yeah.
We did have a clip that did that.
So for six months then you were like, okay, I'm going to do Tyga.
And then for six months you were gone.
Yeah.
In that six months you didn't think of me?
No, I did.
But you were like, probably not.
I actually thought you were really mean and I wasn't looking forward to meeting
you.
But Rick Glassman assured me that you were nice in real life.
There's a guy you should always listen to.
Yeah.
What do you, what's your opinion now?
Uh, not much has changed.
I don't know.
So.
You scare me a little.
Wow.
Wow.
What was your pre, what was your opinion of me before you met me and then after?
Truly, I had no opinion of you before.
Good.
Blank slate.
People generally don't.
I had heard of.
I'll be honest.
People don't have an opinion of me before?
Generally don't.
And then when they meet you, they kind of do.
And that's a good thing.
Yeah.
Well, yours is usually negative.
No, it's positive.
She just said she thought you were an asshole and then she met you and it was
confirmed.
But she had an opinion.
I think it's better to have an opinion than not having an opinion before.
You should have less opinions is how I feel.
You know, you're acting strange today, dude.
What is it you think?
You didn't sleep well or something.
Did not.
I know.
I can tell by your face.
I was up all night.
I was worried about this interview.
Yeah, me too.
All night.
I woke up four times to pee thinking.
What are we going to do?
What are we going to talk to this fucking goon about?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And I didn't get any sleep and now I, what was your opinion after we met?
You're lovely.
Am I?
Yeah.
We got on pretty well.
Let me ask you.
Wait, wait, no, no, stop.
I want to move on.
Can I ask one more last and then we'll move on?
Because yours haven't been, there's been no good questions out of you so far.
Am I wrong?
Can we back this up or no?
I like the flower question.
Yo, that one was a fucking home run.
Way to go, Pete.
The flower question.
Yeah, I liked it.
Yeah, it's called nature's beauty.
You don't know about nature's beauty, dude?
You're on fire today.
Go ahead.
All right.
Go ahead.
So your opinion of Andrew after you met him, is your opinion stronger about him
than your
opinion about me after that we met?
Is the love you have for me more than the hate you have for Bobby?
I don't think that came out smooth.
I just said.
It came out weird.
It came out weird.
Is that how you meant it?
Is the love for me bigger than the hate for Bobby?
That's how I meant it, yeah.
Uh, it's like a tie.
Good.
Yeah.
That's good.
Oh, that's good.
Where'd you go?
Huh?
To get that?
Creation?
Yeah.
Okay.
Anyway, go.
What?
Are you plugging creation?
What the fuck is going on with you today?
What is going on with you?
Dude, even if you're saying this right now, you would never ask what's going on
with me.
I don't like it.
Whatever.
Yeah, yeah.
Whatever you're doing right now, stop it.
I had a bad.
You're trying to brag in front of her or something.
No, I'm not.
Yeah, you're changing your thing.
Like, you know what I mean?
Like, I'm like.
Ow.
That hurt.
Is this normally how you're podcast?
Yes.
You talk to each other while your guest watches?
Oh, do you want to?
Yeah, let's not compare po