Name: Keep Sketch Away From Loop Loop | Ep 237 | Bad Friends
Uploaded: 2024-09-23T16:00:36.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Keep Sketch Away From Loop Loop | Ep 237 | Bad Friends' from Bad Friends on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-09-23. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Keep Sketch Away From Loop Loop | Ep 237 | Bad Friends' from Bad Friends on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-09-23. Transcript available.

Keep Sketch Away From Loop Loop | Ep 237 | Bad Friends

you two are bad friends who are these two idiots white dude i'm an asian dude
you two are disgusting
well you two are something we're bad friends i love you just the way you are
well okay do it
again i love you just the way you are i love you just the way you are you not
remember this guy
yeah um did he sing for um um the doobie brothers he was a solo artist what's
his name aaron neville
oh he's black yeah black yeah he wears chelsea jerseys too that's exactly right
so we got a guest in today ladies and gentlemen sketch sketch kyle right kyle
sketches here uh
kylie yes sir kylie thanks for having me yeah hey sketch thank you do that do
he do he just learned
about uh there it is hey it's the worst uh turned into a meme unintentional
meme yeah it's incredible
what do you mean you had pro athletes what's up brother yeah death pop bear
yeah do it dude dude you
do you do it what's up brother what's up brother god it's there i love it i
love it so much yeah
yeah maybe a little exit there and i mean how did that become a viral thing uh
i was just playing
with my buddy and we're having like i just don't know i'm because i've tried to
thought i've trump
to think trying to think of catchphrases and i what's a brother just kind of
flew by my mind you
know it doesn't even like it was not even like funny or anything too it's more
of like i just threw up
a finger and then it turned into like an inside no it's incredible yeah well he's
trying to get a catchphrase
can you make up one for him because you were good enough to make up how about
this how about keep
keep it loose lady no no why no keep it loose late loose lady and you do a
little hole like this
i liked it yeah keep it loose lady yeah keep it loose lady maybe uh city
chicken or something yeah yeah
oh city chicken what city chicken city chicken what your catchphrase could be
city chicken
well what's the hand gesture double c oh right whoa it's like the crips yeah
yeah you already got a
look i think it needs a third thing i'll try throwing an accent on oh all right
so what was it city
chicken city chicken no no no no no how about city's chicken no no no no jesus
christ
friendly fire what friendly fire friendly fire orange chicken that's mine yeah
you're city chicken
i'm orange chicken well there are other catchphrases that you're known for is
that it um there's other
things i've known for but not catchphrases all right um uh what no your video
gaming yeah yeah that
well this is what's interesting bobby is old um okay and loves video games i
love it and you're young
and you love video games this is the meeting of the world except he's more into
sports sports gaming
and you're more into cozy cozy gaming yeah yeah you know about cozy gaming what's
cozy gaming
well you've never heard of cozy gaming bro we play like half naked or something
yeah
no cozy games are like stardew valley farming simulation like just cozy oh like
farming simulator
yeah yeah relaxing games he likes he likes why are you squinting like that oh
no i just get like
like i get fog in my eyes yeah yeah yeah but that's the look that you do when
you take it yeah it is
yeah so what do you look like when you take that or even worse well i usually
kind of put both my feet
up on a seat yeah let me let me see let me see your face oh nice that's very
nice you guys both you
have both the same eyes you do know that right yeah yeah what do you know squinting
i don't know
if it's asian or down syndrome no yours yeah what are we both doing i don't
know is it asian or
tons a little bit of both hey yeah a little bit of both for you yeah yeah but
no he's into cozy gaming
he likes bob likes uh low stakes long term like long play games he likes
marathon yet or it takes
you months where you grind yeah yeah yeah i like that like grinding grinding
yeah yeah yeah sometimes
like i'm talking about like would you like getting getting getting on someone
or something yeah yeah
what did you say getting on somebody no no that's not what i mean no he means
putting in the work
putting in the work like you know like collecting mushrooms or whatever it
might be you collect
mushrooms what stops up not in my real life you think like i'll go and get portobello
mushrooms
in the forest that does sound like you eat it does sound really no no like in
some games like in skyrim
like there's a for are you okay i'm good lean back can you hear me can you hear
me i'm sorry why are you
too aggressive yeah what are you doing i'm sorry dude welcome welcome hey this
is thanks for coming
asian on asian crime here yeah wow so you're a quarter what are you is there a
percentage of you
that's asian um no people think i'm asian yeah i'm more like uh hispanic oh you're
more like hispanic
yeah yeah yeah you say you're more like hispanic or you more you are more hispanic
i more emulate
hispanics ah are you a full white though um pretty much yeah yeah do you have
you done your 23 and
me or whatever no i haven't i uh i need to wait i'm a little i mean like i'm a
little darker i don't
think so yeah i don't think so you're i think you look you're just white with a
little bit of tan
that's true yeah white with tan yeah i've been outside a lot no you're white i
don't see the tan you
don't see his tan at all no yeah he's a little tan well i have to know what he
looks like in the winter
oh right well i don't know winter kyle right what are your colors what are your
colors in the winter
my colors in the winter yeah i can get pretty white okay good yeah okay good it's
pretty yeah do you
ever tan your nuts tan my nuts yeah yeah no okay do other things should try
whoa wait wait wait stop
this is the i want to get into he loves this yeah tippy tap that's it you tippy
tap your nuts
little nut play throw me to each side of the leg yeah is it your own nuts or
somebody else's that's
what happens when if you cozy game like if you're playing with your pants off
yeah yeah yeah
nuts start to get stuck to the side of your thigh yep yeah throw them each side
yeah we used to call
that the bat wing the bat wing yeah if your nut gets stuck to your thigh and
you spread it it looks
like a bat wing okay you never done that you never done that the flying
squirrel it's called a bat
cave when you get it stuck to your gooch that's true okay that's a little bat
cave that's something i
write that down that's something i'm learning now thank you so much that cave
yeah thank you so much
and you can when it gets stuck under there you can yell alfred and it'll it'll
unhang oh the butler or
whatever his name is yes well the wienerler yeah did he get pussy butler i don't
did alfred ever get
pussy in the game in the movies you know the problem is what bruce wayne kept
him so away from
everything you know alfred didn't have time to get ass but one time he did when
in what move i'll
tell you what movie when did he get i'll tell you what he got ass he got ass in
um the dark night
when i'll tell you when dude would you just let me talk dude i don't like being
rushed by you
why are you rushing me today dude all right sorry my bad that was my fault
thank you
that was my aggression so go ahead i apologize when does it happen well
remember the that russian
ballerina thing they closed that down uh-huh right and then you know i mean
then they got a yacht
right and then remember christian bale jumped out of the yacht because he's
going to get on a plane i
remember the capture the ching chong guy yes yeah yeah yeah i don't know his
name chin hon my friend
the actor chin right and alfred was on the boat with these ballerinas so we don't
know what happened
there oh the assumption is yeah he got to pick he got to pick whoever he wanted
well i mean what
probably the deshaun watson treatment yeah oh bobby doesn't know who that is no
but i like it but i
do get the reference and he doesn't yeah yeah well tell me the reference it's
uh like a pretty much
a happy ending massage except with a little more stretching whoa so you're
getting massage getting
happy ending while you're doing yoga yes or pilates it's a surprise to the
other person it's a
surprise to the other person not good so if you and i were sketch stretching
let's say you and i did
hot yoga okay can you see that happening in a yeah can you see us doing hot
yoga together i can all
right i i imagine envision we're in hawaii could i know thailand or something
like that oh you want
to go we'll go to thailand right the motherland what do you think i'm thai you
think i'm thai i'm
guessing no you're not no you're right well guess what i am what it where's
bangkok
thailand okay yeah yeah yeah no i'm not is that your last guess or you wouldn't
um uh let me let
me think about all of them yeah yeah yeah um we'll just look korea yes yeah
wow it's so good right on the money right so we're doing hot uh we're doing hot
yoga in thailand
right and we're stretching and then i walk up to you and i just start like
putting my hands on
your genitals is that what you mean by the deshaun lewis yeah the deshaun lewis
that's what he's
talking about yeah yeah okay that's what he's talking about yeah yeah is it deshaun
lewis what's
his name sean watson sean watson exactly have you ever had a happy ending i've
done it to myself many
times have you ever had a happy ending i've been to vegas yeah okay good that
sounds good i mean have
you gotten a hand job how old are you by the way you're 25 25 so i assume you've
had a hand job
before uh yes sir they're the worst yeah do you like them or no um they're
pretty uh i don't i don't
prefer them yeah let's go let's get the let's get to the the other parts yeah
oh what are the other
parts i don't know from your part of this country i don't know it could be
different oh this yeah head
and shoulders hey oh i don't know but yes second second base second base
head and shoulders do you like suckering on titty or what i do
you are you're a butt guy or are you a titty guy um hey i love fucking titties
knew it i knew you were one of us the american way look at that god god is good
god bless america
country in the world it's the best country you know you can't do that in any
other country you can't
titty fuck overseas i know they shun it well asia their titties are so small it's
very difficult
yeah two small things don't do yeah you're just doing chest bone fucking
you know what i mean they have these hard chest bone korean legs oh you just
got to rub it against
the chest but that is that is that you know that is how they make uh fire wasabi
and wasabi
like what like a pigeon chest very good true yeah i like whoa dude i like that
broad shoulder are you
seeing somebody now kylie um seeing someone no not specifically okay i'm kind
of uh just doing tryouts
kind of like oh you got oh i like that so when you go out on a date um let's
say i'm a girl
can we pretend yes sir yeah my name is loop loop oh i love her this is my
favorite character i love
loop yeah i'm loop loop yeah no no no what are you doing that's your italian
yeah yeah all right
i'm loop loop perfect hey what's up brother hey hey sister very good already
you're already
sucking his dick where are we going where are we going yeah hey let's just go
straight to the crib
whoa yeah but it's 6 p.m i haven't eaten i thought we're gonna have dinner okay
uh sushi okay where
brother thailand we're gonna go to thailand whoa this guy's gonna fly you to thailand
so now we're on
a plane that's that's probably the easiest way to get the play there whoa you're
gonna fly all the
way to thailand to get sushi possibly you you don't know any sushi places in la
or texas no no okay fine
we're going to we're going to get some chicken or something oh chicken well it
was a downgrade yeah
yeah yeah sushi we went from sushi to chicken already the way you're dressed
you know you look like you
probably give it up pretty easy whoa whoa wait you're saying that i'm fat no i
know it's no it's the
small hands inside oh i have a little tight dainty hand no i'm just kidding
okay okay anyway so w