Name: Korean Joker v Dave Blunts | Ep 262 | Bad Friends
Uploaded: 2025-03-24T16:00:45.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Korean Joker v Dave Blunts | Ep 262 | Bad Friends' from Bad Friends on Comedy Buff. Published 2025-03-24. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Korean Joker v Dave Blunts | Ep 262 | Bad Friends' from Bad Friends on Comedy Buff. Published 2025-03-24. Transcript available.

Korean Joker v Dave Blunts | Ep 262 | Bad Friends

Hello.
Hello there, mate.
Mate.
I'm being some taste.
And we're going to London, England, July 18th.
And then July 19th, we'll be in Dublin, Ireland.
Tickets are available right now.
We never go to these places.
Never go to these places.
Once the show's done, we no come back.
We no come back.
Yeah, yeah.
So you got to go.
You got to go.
So go to badfriendspod.com for those tickets.
Badfriendspod.com.
You two are bad friends.
Who are these two idiots?
A white dude and an Asian dude.
You two are disgusting.
Who are you two or something?
We're bad friends.
Let me tell you something.
You texted me today and you said, are you mad at me?
Never.
Yeah, you do.
You get angry.
And you know what?
I've never been mad at you.
You have Dollywood.
Do you cancel sessions that are important to us?
Yeah.
I know.
That's what I'm talking about.
It's an inner lingering slow burn of anger.
Hi, Rudy Jewell.
Look what we got for you.
A normal chair.
Rudy.
Rudy.
Rudy.
Yeah.
I haven't seen you since last year.
Do you miss me?
I miss you.
But you're going over to Tiger Belly.
You're doing that all the time.
And you're really breaking my heart a little bit.
No, because I.
No, no, no, no.
We embraced you.
Not just Tiger Belly.
Oh, yeah.
She's on.
Trash Tuesday, baby.
Where the money is.
So here's the problem.
And the followings.
And the glamour.
And the glitz.
We gave you your start.
Nothing.
She dropped us, dude.
Well, you know what we are?
We are the guy that she dated before she got famous.
Exactly.
And she drops us.
No, she got famous.
You know, the first guy that you date.
I'll even do one you better, dude.
Yeah, give it.
Right?
We're the hot guy, right?
That she dated.
I disagree with the first part.
But just hear my point.
We're the medium guy.
We're the medium guy.
But then she got blew up and went uglier.
Oh, yeah.
That's what I meant.
That's what I meant.
Interesting.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Like, I'm going to go just, I'm going to go down.
I'm going to go downtown.
What's been going on, Jules?
I've just been dissecting animals.
God bless.
God bless you.
Rats and earthworms and the crickets.
How are you dissecting earthworms?
Those are so small.
You're using the tiniest little knife.
Yeah, and it's really fun, especially with the rats.
You love dissecting rats.
She went to ugly and also just ghosted the hot guy.
Well, as soon as, as soon as, here's what really happened.
Tell me the science behind it.
As soon as she left this show and you and Kalilah broke up and she started to
get away from our show,
Yeah, that's when she was like, I don't need to talk to Tito Andra ever again.
And she, that seems to be the truth.
It's the truth.
That seems to be the reality.
And that's okay.
Did I, did I show you nothing but love for four years?
Pure love.
It's the kind of love, it's the kind of love Mother Teresa gave.
Same.
To the pores.
Exact same.
Yeah, yeah.
It's that kind of unhinged.
Undying.
Undying love.
That's what I meant.
Anyway.
Ladies and gentlemen, Rudy Giuliani is back.
Rudy Giuliani is back in the studio.
Are you happy to be back?
I'm happy.
Who of the people here are you happiest to see?
Let's go in order.
Happiest to least happy to see.
Go ahead.
First is you.
Thank you.
Andres.
Yes.
Carlos.
Awesome.
McCone.
Love that.
And Bobby's separate.
You're separate.
It doesn't count because she sees you all the time.
Bobby's separate, yeah.
She sees you all the time.
I'm not even on the list.
What?
I cannot believe that.
I always see you.
Let me ask you, lady.
You see her every day.
There was a fire long ago, right?
Yeah.
Right?
Was there not a fire long ago?
The great Chicago.
No, the great LA fire.
Oh, the lovely.
People are running.
You know what I mean?
Yeah, running, right?
Help!
Right?
I get a call.
Can you harbor and take care of little jewels and the dogs?
And I said, kindly, my heart is out to you.
My heart goes out.
And you know what happens to that heart?
You know what happens to that heart?
They pee on it.
They piss on your heart.
Yeah.
You piss.
You squat on his chest.
In the yellowest pee you've ever seen.
Wow.
Yeah.
Jimmy O. Yang yellow.
Wow.
Yeah, that's the most yellow you can get.
Right.
Very bright.
That is a bright star.
Yeah.
Well, I'll say this.
I'm glad that you're back.
I love that you put McCone last.
He is the least important of the crew.
Although, he did have a fun time at my special and then he went and jumped in
the, what did you do?
You jumped in the lake?
Yeah, at a polar plunge.
He did a polar plunge and all the proceeds went to, so all the proceeds went,
it was for Special Olympics.
So, here's what they do.
All the money they collected, they rounded up all of these strong people to
throw handicapped people into the lake.
Handicapped people?
Yeah, people with Down syndrome, they threw them in the lake.
That guy doesn't have Down syndrome, does he?
He does.
Well, he does after he gets out of that lake.
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
I mean, Shape Down syndrome, but I don't think it happened.
Down syndrome, Shape.
Yeah, yeah, the Shape, yeah.
So, what, the money I donated to you went to where?
I hope it didn't go to you.
And how much did I donate?
None.
Exactly.
I don't believe in it.
You didn't give him any money?
I don't believe in the fucking cause.
It's for Special Olympics.
Go ahead.
It is?
It was all for Special Olympics.
I said that in the text.
That's why I gave him-
I thought he was doing a joke, like you were in the Special Olympics.
I don't even read it.
Well, I know you didn't read it.
I just read Special Olympics.
He's trying to make fun of me.
You think he's attacking you?
He's attacking me, so I didn't read the whole thing.
Yeah, don't put that in there next time.
But you don't get anything.
But, whoa.
I am happy that that money went to there.
So, you jumped in the river.
I told you not to jump in the lake.
I could have just given you the money.
No, it's fine.
Was it cold?
12 degrees outside.
How cold was the water?
Water was 33 degrees.
Love it.
And how long did you stay in for?
No chance you lasted.
No, I was under and we'd out immediately.
You went head underneath?
That's smart.
That's good.
It's deep enough to where you kind of have to.
Have you ever done a polar plunge?
Have you ever jumped in a freezing cold lake or body of water?
No.
Did you go naked?
No, I was just wearing short shorts.
All the Special Olympics kids were naked for sure.
There's no doubt.
They can't keep the clothes on.
I mean, I'm tired.
I haven't slept.
But let me say something.
You're tired?
It's 7 p.m.
We did this.
We moved this shoot till nighttime.
You got back from San Francisco at 9 a.m.
What'd you do today?
Okay.
So, all weekend I did not sleep at all.
You were doing shows.
I know.
Did not sleep.
How?
I just couldn't.
It was so cold and the heat was too heat.
I don't like when the heat's too heat.
You know what I mean?
What is your perfect optimal room temperature in a hotel?
Probably a 70.
You know you can set that right on the thing.
I know, but what happens is it's so cold through the window.
Oh.
It combines.
And there's a horrific.
Oh, it's like when the Atlantic and the Pacific meet.
It's like, no, I'm more like an angel and the demon.
Oh.
And they're dancing in the air.
And I don't really like that.
Dancing in the air.
Air, you know?
Now, did you have a hotel with a bathtub?
It's a combino.
You see at the Hotel Zoe?
The Zoe.
The Zoe.
Yeah.
Is that not Zoe?
I don't know, actually.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I did that last time.
I didn't this time, but it's a combo tub shower.
I don't like it.
But you know what I do like?
And it's polite.
Okay, sometimes it's a combo shower bath,
but if you want to take a fucking shower,
you have to actually go in the tub and do the shower,
and then you get wet.
Get out.
But you know what this clever fucking front has?
A little window.
Oh, you put your arm through.
You put your arm through and you open it.
I remember that.
You remember that?
Yeah, that's right.
And it's a clever little Zoe.
Smart.
I like it.
I don't like the shower tubs
because I feel like I'm going to slip,
and that is exactly how I die.
I'm already prone to slipping in bathrooms
and hitting my head on the thing.
Well, we've heard the story.
I know.
Yeah, yeah.
I don't need to do it.
And they have earthquakes up there.
Imagine.
I imagine.
Imagine it happened to me twice.
But I hadn't been back to Cobbs.
That was the last time I was there
is when Ken Jeong attacked me in the green room.
How long ago is this?
Like 15 years ago.
So I pointed to all my openers.
This is where it happened.
Wow.
And I positioned the chairs.
He turned around like this.
How nice is Cobbs?
I honestly, and then after that,
I did a MySpace corporate show.
Wow.
With Al Madrigal.
Wow.
Ian Edwards.
Natasha Leggero.
It's, ask everyone that works there.
When I got off stage, I started to cry.
I bummed so bad.
And then I went into the kitchen.
Well, MySpace isn't even around anymore, is it?
That's how long ago it was.
And I got on my hands and knees,
and I vowed to the gods,
I'll never play her again.
I've always had bad luck there.
At Cobbs?
Yeah, so I haven't been there for like 15 years.
God, MySpace is still active.
It's still active, yeah.
I wonder what my page looks like.
Go to Bobby Lee on MySpace.
Let's see what that looks like.
I don't think I, there's no way.
They got rid of it.
They got rid of it.
It's gone.
Johinge's profile picture.
Johinge's profile picture.
You never had MySpace, did you?
I had.
My aunt made it for me,
but I just didn't know what to do.
They didn't have internet back then,
so they had to physically make it.
They physically make a space for her.
This is my on it.
It's MySpace.
Yeah, yeah.
And she sits in a little fucking hole.
They just go around all day,
around Subu going,
that's MySpace, that's MySpace, that's MySpace.
Yeah, yeah.
And then you draw your friends, right?
Your top 10.
You draw the faces.
On the walls?
On the wall, yeah, yeah.
Walls with fire?
It's really good.
Yeah, with fire, yeah.
So it's cool.
Tell me what's been going on in your life, Jules.
I am interested to know.
Well, I'm graduating.
By the way, look at this.
Look at this.
Look.
Hold on.
Look at my finger.
What's going on with you?
It's been doing this.
Look at him.
Oh, my God.
He has that disease.
Parkinson's?
Give me back that Polar Plunge money.
What's been going on?
I'm graduating this May, so if you guys want to come.
No, we don't want to come.
To your graduation?
I'm going.
Of course we want to go.
What are we talking?
Of course we want to.
Do we wear a suit?
What do we happen?
You know we're dressed like men in black?
No, just just casual.
No, you know what we'll do?
We'll get the suits from Dumb and Dumber.
Oh, yeah.
Can we wear those?
Let's pull those.
We're going to be bright.
I want to wear those.
I'm going to bleach my hair.
I'm going to wear funny goggles.
Dude, Dumb and Dumber suits.
Can we?
Look at that.
You and me, that's 100%.
We have to wear them.
We're going to dress that.
That's you and me.
Are you going to really do that, though?
I'll do it with you.
Yeah, let's do it.
Okay, it's on May, so I'll get your ticket.
On May.
Well, so school worked well.
Can I tell you?
In May.
Yeah, May, okay.
So it's in May.
Yeah.
And then is there an after party?
I mean, I'm not going unless there's an after party.
There's no...
You're not throwing a graduation party?
There's going to be a rager.
No.
You have to throw a party.
How about boba milk tea?
You love that.
A little boba tea party.
Yeah, yeah.
You know what?
We'll set it up.
We'll get a boba truck.
Boba truck, boba milk party.
Let's do that.
Okay.
Okay.
That sounds fun.
Look at that.
That's what we want to do.
We want to party.
And you got to throw your...
And then three years from now, they're from the sodas.
Underneath there, you just say corn or flour right underneath.
I'm off today.
I'm off today.
You're getting back.
I'm getting back.
You're fine.
We're going to hum right into it.
So, um...
What are you going to write on your cap?
You have to write li