Name: The Vile Horrendous w/ Joe DeRosa | Ep 283 | Bad Friends
Uploaded: 2025-08-18T16:00:49.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'The Vile Horrendous w/ Joe DeRosa | Ep 283 | Bad Friends' from Bad Friends on Comedy Buff. Published 2025-08-18. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'The Vile Horrendous w/ Joe DeRosa | Ep 283 | Bad Friends' from Bad Friends on Comedy Buff. Published 2025-08-18. Transcript available.

The Vile Horrendous w/ Joe DeRosa | Ep 283 | Bad Friends

- Hey! - Hey!
- It's the last chance for merch.
- Last chance, we have these hats.
I wear all the time, look at how dope these hats are.
- And we also have shirts, we have the thank you shirt,
we have the Bad Friends, the weird skulls shirt,
same design here.
- Same design here.
- And we also have socks, so we still have the socks, right?
- Yeah, they're the best socks.
- Badfriendsmerch.com.
- You can get it, right?
- You're gonna get it, badfriendsmerch.com,
where you can get the shirts, the hats.
This is the last chance, we're closing it out, right?
This is it, we're done.
- This is it. - Yeah, soon.
- Why not? - Get it now,
badfriendsmerch.com.
- You two are bad friends.
- Who are these two idiots?
- A white dude, I'm an Asian dude.
You two are disgusting.
- Well, you two are something.
- We're bad friends.
- Guess who's charming?
- Who's charming?
- You are, dude.
You're a charm, charm, charmer, dude.
Dapper.
When you get a little buzz, my friend,
you get like, good evening.
- Dapper dude. - Hello.
And you get extremely charming, 'cause I--
Well, that's better than Jekyll and Hyde.
I don't like start getting angry and fighting people
when I have a couple of cocktails.
You introduced me to a friend.
I was trying to be polite and nice
and ingratiate myself to her.
And I was like, hey, how are you?
And I gave her a hug and she actually said,
oh, we're hugging.
- I know, but she said that?
- She goes, oh, we're hugging.
- It was a 50/50.
Like we were in the car, we had dinner.
And then Andrew calls me and goes,
we're over at so-and-so, right?
And I go, okay.
And he's like, DeRosa's here.
I can say that.
Yeah. Yeah.
So I go, okay.
And he goes, you said, come on by.
- I wanted you to come by.
- So I brought, it was 50/50.
So I said to her, I go, we'd, you know,
because I know that you're doing
a little drink, drink, drink, right?
You're a drink, drink, drink.
- With him, it's bad.
- Yeah, it got bad.
- Yeah.
- I heard he got by later, but-
- I was drinking, yeah.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I heard you got wild.
- What did I do?
- No, I'm gonna tell you, let's recap, okay?
- Okay.
- So then, I go, you know, I don't know,
what are you gonna say, Jekyll or Hyde?
It can't get Hyde.
- When does it get Hyde?
- And it can also get Jekyll.
- When have I Hyde-ed with you?
- Hyde is the good one, right?
- I don't even know.
- Yeah, which was the bad one?
- I don't know.
- Yeah, I think Jekyll's the bad one.
- Jekyll sounds like the bad one.
- Jekyll, yeah, like a Jekyll.
So you might get Jekyll.
And she's like, what do you mean?
I go, we'll see.
We come, and as soon as I say it, I go, it's Hyde.
'Cause you stood up and you have this little smirk.
It's very Casablanca.
Hello, hello, my dear, you know what I mean?
Like, good evening.
- Maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's very like that.
So I'm like, oh, thank God, it's Hyde.
So we, no, I'm being real, you sit down,
and then what Hyde does is he just becomes very like,
a lot of questions.
- I'm interested in her.
- Too many questions.
- Okay. - Okay.
But-- - Is that a real thing?
You meet someone for the first time.
I wanna know, I'm interested in her.
- There are memes about this where your friend
all of a sudden becomes a comedian around your girl.
- I was being, I was--
- Too charming.
- Asking someone like, hey, what is this about
that I've heard about you?
Can I say it?
- It's just the whole, the way you hold up a prosciutto.
Yeah, I don't like.
- Chicken wings?
We were eating chicken wings.
- Whatever it was.
- What if you--
- It's just the way, you know what I mean?
- The way I was eating.
- Everything, your pinkies are out,
all three fingers are out.
It's very like, hello.
- You told me she's a witch.
- And then you're asking Salem witch.
Like, you know what I mean?
Like the Salem witch trials witch.
- How do I know that there's a difference?
- Yeah, it's like saying that it's,
it's not like she's a vampire.
- That's why you were asking her
that kind of line of questions.
- No, I didn't.
- Yeah, I mean, what's it like at the coven?
You asked about a coven.
- I said, what's up with the coven?
- Did you ask about a coven?
- I said, what's up with the coven?
- Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
- How is it?
- She's one of those like, burning man,
you know what I mean?
Holistic, you know what I mean?
Shangri-La witches.
- The witches that I hang out with
are at the coven.
- Okay.
- They're coven witches.
- Right, so she does it.
- Double, double, boil and trouble.
- It's more of a--
- Boil, boil.
- It's more of a self-help, you know what I mean?
You know, spiritual thing.
- No, she's very nice though.
And then you guys fucked off.
- But asking about the coven and all that stuff
was a little--
- I didn't ask about the coven.
- There was a coven question.
- I don't even know what the coven is.
- Either it was you or your friend.
Your friend, he goes, well, is there a group?
And I looked at him, I go,
when you say group, do you mean coven?
- Yeah, you--
- And then he goes, yeah, that's what I meant.
- That's on you.
- No, that's on him.
- Is there a group?
- Yeah.
But the way he said it was,
I know what you're leading.
There's a pot.
You know what I mean?
Boiling green, whatever, whatever.
- Does she have a pot?
- Toad feet.
- Does she have a pot?
- No, she has none of that.
- No spells.
- It's crystals.
I did do a spell on you.
- Fuck you then.
Yeah, he told me he did a spell on me.
- I did a spell on you.
- I remember.
- Yeah, what did I--
- You put my name in the freezer.
You wrote my name on a piece of paper
and put it in the freezer.
- Yeah.
I put your name on a piece of paper
and put it in the freezer.
And guess what?
It worked!
- What is the spell?
- You've been chill since.
- I've been chill.
I'm always chill.
- You weren't chill.
- Oh my God.
- When did you put it in the freezer?
- When we got back from Europe.
- Oh, cool.
- Yeah, yeah.
- I put your name in the thing.
- I wish I did it before we went there.
But it helped me out.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
But so yeah, I do some of her suggestions.
- Yeah.
- And I think they work.
- Yeah, they must.
- Yeah.
And then I hear, I have lunch today with Andrea Jin
and the person that I'm hanging out with.
And Andrea says, "Anda was there last night at the store."
And I go, "Yeah?"
She goes, "One word, guess what it is?"
- What did she say?
- She's like, "No, wild."
- Wild, I was wild.
- Yeah, you and DeRosa were wilder.
- We were having fun, man.
- Yeah.
- McCone was with us.
We were having a great time.
- Of course you're--
- My son?
- Not just your son.
What do you call it?
- He was drunk, he got fucked up.
- You know what I call McCone?
A familiar.
- Yeah, he's a familiar.
- What is a familiar in the mythological world?
Like vampires have familiars.
- You just hang around.
You're a hang around.
- People that help the vampire get blood.
- Yeah, that's right.
You go get me blood.
- Give me the definition of a familiar.
- It's a supernatural entity.
- Exactly.
- That is an animal.
- Exactly.
- That serves as a companion and helper to a witch,
a sorcerer or other magical practitioner.
- Really stuck on this witch stuff lately.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- You're definitely a familiar.
- You're a familiar for sure.
- Yeah, and you're a warlock.
- Mmm.
- Wizard and a warlock, wizard and a warlock.
I love it.
We went out, me and DeRosa went on stage together twice
and we had so fun.
They do that in New York sometimes.
Like you see guys at the cellar do it.
They don't do that here.
And so DeRosa was like, I'll go on stage with you.
And I was like, that could be fun.
- Yeah.
- 'Cause I was like, I'll get you a spot.
I was like, no.
- So he took my spot.
- He took yours and.
- Who else canceled?
- Someone else dropped out.
- Yeah, I dropped out.
I wanted to, I know you're gonna talk about it,
but sometimes I'll just go, I'm not gonna do it.
I'm gonna hang out.
I watch Lord of the Rings, their friend.
- Spots?
- Yeah.
- Yeah, I get it.
- Yeah, I canceled last minute,
but thank God DeRosa took my spot.
- It was great.
People.
- Did he go, so he went up at 10?
- We went to the first spot together
and then we went to the store and then we,
I went up solo in the main
and then we went up together in the OR.
- But what I'm saying is, is that on stage,
I heard you were extra.
- I went off a little bit.
- That's all.
- I had a night.
- Yeah, yeah.
- I was having fun.
- But I heard it was very funny.
- I haven't let the Band-Aid rip in a long time.
- Yeah, yep.
- No, sometimes I wanna have a couple of cocktails
and let the Band-Aid rip.
- You gotta let the Band-Aid rip sometimes.
- I don't, when's the last time you saw me like that?
- God, it's been a couple of years.
- It's pretty rare.
- But you do it when it's like,
I'm Charles Bukowski and I'm gonna just go to a bar
by myself and, you know what I mean,
write poetry or whatever.
- What?
What in the fuck are you talking about, man?
- What do you mean?
I'm not literal poetry.
- Do I like to go, oh, you're making fun of when I,
you're making fun of when I go to my spot
in New York and write.
Yeah, I like that.
- No, no, that's not what I'm saying.
- Oh.
- Dollywood.
- Yeah.
- Oh no, that was a mental breakdown.
- I know, but that's what I'm saying, the Bukowski.
I'm gonna go to a bar by myself.
- Yeah.
- And not literally write a poem,
but you go into yourself and write poetry in your mind.
- I'll tell you what I did at that bar,
at that Tommy Bahama or whatever, no, Margaritaville.
I bought everyone food and drinks.
I turned into Hyde.
- Oh.
- I was Jekyll with you, bud.
- Yeah, yeah, you're Jekyll with me a lot.
- Well, why do you think that is?
- Because I'm 100% Hyde.
- No.
- You think I'm Jekyll sometimes?
No, let's be real.
- Get fucked.
- You, fuck you.
- Fuck you.
- You think I'm Jekyll sometimes?
- You are, you're doing it right now.
Look at the shirt you're wearing too,
this Iron Maiden fucking.
- Run to the hills.
- Such a good song.
- The Trooper, great song.
- I wanna say this though.
Can you get more lighters?
What are you doing with all this?
- Okay, I'll tell you why.
- Yeah, why?
- There's nothing worse in the world
when you're in your car.
How many smokers are here?
- Three.
- Richie, right.
Isn't there nothing in the world?
You have cigarettes.
You're in the car.
- Richie, you smoke?
- I know.
- Yeah.
- You smoke cigarettes?
- Yeah.
- Yeah, he does, look at him.
- How long have you been smoking?
- Well, I actually,
I had probably like sophomore year high school.
- Jesus.
- And what do you know, a senior?
- Now, yes.
- Now, how old do you know?
- 24.
- Yeah.
- Wow, he had some time.
- He doesn't look like a smoker.
- Yeah, I just realized who he is.
Every generation.
- Buddy Holly.
- Close.
Maybe, maybe.
- Yeah.
- But the generation after that is,
who he is is Robert Crumb.
- Who the fuck, who's that?
- Look up Robert Crumb, dude.
- The cartoonist?
- The cartoonist.
- There lies the man, he's a rock.
- He's young Robert Crumb.
- Dude, that's Robert.
Come on, dude.
- You're young Robert Crumb.
- Dude, you're young Robert Crumb, dude.
- That is a fact.
- Dude, it's a fact, dude.
- That's very funny.
- And you don't draw.
So that's not.
- That's not good.
- That's not good.
You can draw like a motherfucker.
So my panic is when you're in the car
and you don't have a lighter,
and then you're just kind of looking around for one.
So what I do is I buy three or four
and just scatter them around the car.
- Smart.
- That's what I'm saying, being mindful.
- Yeah, when I used to smoke pot,
what I would do is I would buy a lot of lighters
and then I would give them to my friends
because I know they'd get back to me.
- What do you mean by that?
- Because when you smoke weed with people,
you're always like giving lighters, Carlos knows.
- Yeah, you're giving your lighters away
and then they come back to you eventually.
- They come back to you.
- In the mail?
What are you talking about?
- So when you smoke a lot of pot with your group-
- I've done it.