Name: Yellow Peril & Cave Butter | Ep 291 | Bad Friends
Uploaded: 2025-10-13T16:01:00.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Yellow Peril & Cave Butter | Ep 291 | Bad Friends' from Bad Friends on Comedy Buff. Published 2025-10-13. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Yellow Peril & Cave Butter | Ep 291 | Bad Friends' from Bad Friends on Comedy Buff. Published 2025-10-13. Transcript available.

Yellow Peril & Cave Butter | Ep 291 | Bad Friends

Hey, what's up, bad friends? I am on tour. I'm back out on the road.
First up, I do San Francisco. Sadly, that's sold out. I think there's a wait
list now.
Brea, Southern California, Brea Improv. Come out and see me, Brea.
Then I'm going to be at the Tempe Improv out there in my old stomping grounds
of ASU.
I'm going to be in Hammond, Indiana, right before Thanksgiving.
I'm going to be at Caesars, Windsor in Ontario, Canada.
Then I'm going to Bethlehem, PA, Hanover, Maryland, Atlantic City at the Borgata.
That's getting close to being sold out.
Valley Center, Harrah's Casino down in Valley Center, which is near San Diego.
Canyonville, Oregon, over there during Valentine's Day.
And then I'm going to be at the Wynn Casino in Las Vegas in March of the new
year.
So get your ticket to andrewsantino.com, andrewsantino.com.
I went for a hike today, and I had to carry my dog up half of the hill.
She's getting old.
Oh, no.
My heart break.
It is so funny.
She's getting to the point now where she just lays down when she's over it.
You know when dogs like sit, and they just won't get up because you're like,
come on, come on.
She just lay down in the dirt.
I was like, please get up and go.
Please, can we go?
And then she just looked up.
I was like, I'll pick you.
How old is this?
36.
Wow, that's good.
That's really good.
She's going to be nine, I think.
So I made the decision.
She's an old dog.
We have a dog named Remy.
Eyes completely white.
You're going to do it, aren't you?
And you're going to put her down?
Okay.
Spine crooked.
Dude, bro, what?
No, but when it bugs eyes significantly.
Stress or fear when they have.
Completely blind.
Remy is deaf.
Cricket spine.
Right?
Won't leave his bed.
Right?
So the vet said, you guys might want to start thinking about.
Don't put him down.
And I go, we're doing Christmas.
We're doing Christmas.
I go, we're doing Christmas.
Maybe in January.
Put him down on Christmas.
Yeah, but when I told Jules that information two days ago,
we all just started crying.
I know.
I don't want to hear it.
What?
You don't want to hear the cry?
I don't want to hear how you cry.
And then you start thinking about your other animals
because I have seven of them.
They're all going to go.
Yeah, and it's just devastating.
But we're all going to go.
Yeah.
I want to do that full body scan thing you were talking about.
Yeah, I got to do it too.
Because we know a comic that had that done
and they found a little something.
They found a little something in our friend.
Yeah, yeah.
I want to do a full body scan.
Carlos, you should do a full body scan.
Yeah.
I just got health insurance this summer.
I'm excited.
Is that the first time you've ever had it?
No, not since I got dropped off my parents
like 11 years ago.
Are your parents disappointed in you?
That's what it feels like.
No.
How could they look back at their lives and you
and they go, oh, we're proud.
Yeah.
Because I'm not like, I'm not dead.
Yeah, you didn't die.
Yeah.
I don't work like a...
I'm proud of you.
You are?
Oh, yeah.
The glory holes.
You know what I mean?
That stuff's cool.
Yeah, yeah.
A lot of times you've almost died and survived.
I kept this job.
Yeah, that's true.
Is this the longest job you've ever had?
Yeah.
100,000%.
Yeah, dude.
Have you thought about quitting ever?
No, never.
I love this job.
You do?
Yeah, I love it.
You got like the fame.
That's not why.
That's why, baby.
That's projecting.
That is projecting.
I don't like the fame.
Oh, you don't.
I don't get any fame.
I do, but you know what I mean?
Yeah.
I don't bask in it.
Here's how much Bobby hates the fame.
When I said, where'd you go see the movie that we're talking about?
He goes, The Grove.
The most look at me, look at me, look at me location.
The Grove of all places to go see a movie.
That's like being like, I went to Universal Studios.
Chapter 2.
I know.
It's the busiest.
You love that.
Yeah.
I go to the little quiet as far away.
No, you go to the hipster one where all the hipsters say,
what's up, man, with their fancy mustaches.
I go to Burbank.
No, you don't.
I do.
No, you don't.
I shouldn't say that.
You went to Echo Park or something.
No, I go to Burbank.
Where did I go to see this movie?
Yeah.
Lemely on Sunset, 8,000 Sunset.
Yeah.
That's because I had dinner down there.
And it's the-
You do it already?
Dude, can I just say something about that?
And it's the only one that had an eight o'clock.
When your lips tighten up, dude, you're starting a fight.
You know what it is?
You what?
It's because my lips are sunburned.
Oh, okay.
I went to, I usually go to Burbank because I like it.
It's quiet.
And there's four theaters up there.
Have you noticed that they've cut down the Nicole Kidman video?
Yeah, I'm tired of it.
I'm tired of it.
It's too long of a walk.
It's too long of a walk.
Too much talking.
Too much.
Right?
The audience goes a little too haywire for me.
But then Friday night when I saw one battle after the next, it was just one
thing she said.
And I was like, that was perfect.
That is good.
The editing.
You know the scene where they're like, put away your cell phone, da, da, da,
and do that thing?
I went down to watch a movie in Inglewood.
Yeah.
They run a different pre-roll down there.
What is it?
Different pre-roll.
What is it?
They're like, take out your cell phone, turn that shit on.
Text and FaceTime the whole time the movie's gone.
Yeah.
Talk as loud as you can.
Talk as loud as you can.
The vital moment.
Walk out to P4 five more times.
Yeah.
Yeah, it was different down there.
Start a riot.
Start a riot.
Start a riot.
You know what else I'm tired of?
Actually, wait, this reminds me of the first time I went to go see Belly in the
movie theater.
Remember Belly?
Oh.
Bring up Belly.
He probably doesn't even remember Belly.
Look at this movie.
I went to go see this in a tough neighborhood.
Yeah.
And DM, spoiler alert, DMX gets killed pretty early on.
And a black dude in front of us stands up and he goes, oh, hell no.
And they walked out.
They wanted DMX in the whole fucking movie.
That's what I do when Michelle Yao dies early.
Oh, hell no.
Like, oh, fuck, I know.
No, so I'm tired of.
God, Belly was such a good movie.
The Coca-Cola commercials with the two people.
Yeah, get it.
Right?
And then all of a sudden they're race car driving.
And then all of a sudden they're dancing.
Yeah.
Right?
And then all of a sudden they're basically just in love on the middle of a New
York street.
And they hit the Cokes together.
I hate that one.
And it has nothing to do with it because they're black.
Okay, good.
It has nothing to do with it.
If they were white, it would annoy me too.
I don't know.
Maybe it wouldn't.
No.
Well, I met this girl at the comedy store.
It was Thursday.
Okay.
Pretty.
Yeah?
Yeah.
Yeah.
And then she was like, then she just kind of made out with me in the hallway.
Just started making out with you?
Well, we talked a little bit.
Had a cigarette, right?
I bought her a drink.
Like the Coke commercial.
Just like the Coke commercial.
And then we raced cars and we started dancing.
It was crazy.
It's pretty cool.
Yeah.
Yeah.
One battle after another though.
That's one of the best movies I've seen.
Best movies I've ever seen.
Also underrated as far as comedy goes.
It won't be considered a comedy, but it absolutely is a comedy.
It's an action movie, but it's a comedy for sure.
Yeah, I find Leo, because of Once Upon a Time in Hollywood too, I think he was
very funny
in that at times.
Yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I just think that it's because he plays it real as well.
It's interesting.
They're funny situations, but he's such a good actor.
And when you play it real.
That's when it's funny.
That's when it's super funny.
It's not like a Will Ferrell character that he's supposed to be.
He is just being funny because this one, the situations are very honest, but
the reaction
is funny.
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And Benicio was great in it.
So good.
The best.
How old is Benicio Del Toro at this point?
Let's take a guess.
Okay.
50 something.
I thought maybe almost 60 by now.
60 gotta be.
62 is my guess.
Do you want to guess, Bob?
Well, I remember when he first came, when he did Usual Suspects, I was at the
Mondrian.
I was a doorman.
But how old was he then?
30?
But he's seen my age, but he was like,
on fire because it was him and Michael Rappaport were in the Mondrian.
I see them like dancing with these hot chicks.
And I remember just sitting there by myself with a Diet Coke, sipping, going,
oh my God,
that's the new Hollywood.
Oh, I want to ask you this.
This is interesting.
These newer theaters, these nicer movie theaters now, it's not just the old
school snacks.
Yeah.
The upgrade is crazy.
Crazy.
Bro, they had, we had, what's it?
Raisinets.
That's old school.
Oh, fuck.
Let me guess.
Let me guess.
No, no, no.
This is just insane.
They had those high-end dark chocolate bars with mixed in like raspberry flakes
and all that
stuff.
And I was like, I'm not getting at the fucking movie theater.
And she was like, let's just get it just with their popcorn.
I was, I can't go back.
Yeah.
The dark milk, the dark chocolate with like the raspberry, like the, you know,
like the
lint chocolate bars, you know, those, they had those on display.
They had 10 different flavors.
I was like, come on, get three or four.
How do you get the butter at the bottom of the bucket?
Say it again.
How do you get the butter at the bottom of the bucket?
Well, you're going to think I'm a psychopath.
No, but because I don't know how to do it.
Because I squirt a cup of butter.
I get a side cup for a fountain and I put butter in it.
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
And then I eat the popcorn and I sip the butter.
Whoa.
Like a shock, like a chaser, a chaser, a butter chaser.
A butter chaser.
Whoa.
But how do you do it?
Do you, do you move?
Sometimes I try to move it.
Huh.
Or you put the butter on top and you do a shake.
Like, what do you do?
How do you get the butter on the bottom?
Do you want my secret?
Yeah.
So you get the bucket.
You can't get the bag.
The bag is an issue, right?
You get the bucket and you go, hey, can you fill that up?
Just below the line.
I know it don't overflow it.
And they fill it up just below the line and you go, can I get a second bucket?
I'll pay for it.
Just an empty bucket.
And I put the bucket on top of the bucket and I shake it like a salad and I mix
it all
up.
And I just throw away.
You really do that?
Yeah.
I throw away the second bucket.
That's ingenious.
It's that or the bucket or the butter shot.
I'll do a butter shot too.
I'll take a little couple.
Yeah.
Okay.
Take a little butter back.
Yeah.
A little popcorn butter back.
What kind of butter is it?
It seems like oil.
It's oil butter.
It's oil butter.
Yeah.
Well, it's also been sitting in that vat for about 40 days.
Yeah.
There's no way they clean it.
It's not good for you.
You know, that's how I got sick in college, right?
What?
Oh, I got.
Butter?
My buddy, my buddy Colin and I, I could call him.
My buddy Colin and I got food poisoning during finals week of college.
We went to go see a movie with our buddy, Colorado John.
And John was the only guy that didn't eat popcorn.
He's like, nah, I don't want popcorn, man.
And we shared a bucket of popcorn and we got so fucking sick.
How do you get food poisoning from popcorn?
From the butter, the butter.
From the butter.
The butter spoiled.
The oil butter.
The butter spoiled.
Oh my God.
The doctor was like, what did you eat?
I went down the list.
I was like, dude, I had ramen, which literally doesn't go bad.
Ramen lasts about nine million years in that packet.
Yeah.
I go, I had ramen for lunch.
That's all I ate until we got to the theater.
And then Colin had a totally different meal.
We both were sick for two full days.
I lost like nine pounds.
It was insane.
Wow.
I look good for finals.
I wasn't with my shirt off.
A, B, C.
Yeah.
Dude, I was sick.
That's the sickest I've ever been food poisoning.
And the doctor concluded, he was like, well, it had to been, did you put