Name: Bobby's Missed Connections | Ep 296 | Bad Friends
Uploaded: 2025-11-17T17:00:25.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Bobby's Missed Connections | Ep 296 | Bad Friends' from Bad Friends on Comedy Buff. Published 2025-11-17. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Bobby's Missed Connections | Ep 296 | Bad Friends' from Bad Friends on Comedy Buff. Published 2025-11-17. Transcript available.

Bobby's Missed Connections | Ep 296 | Bad Friends

you two are bad friends who are these two idiots a white dude and an asian dude
you two are
disgusting well you two are something we're bad friends well look at who's back
hello look who's
back hello hello porgs you know it was really good to see you when i walked in
the into the studio
um i fell a little off did you really no i hugged you twice i hugged you twice
but with some extra
touching with some scratches i love doing scratches with you yeah yeah some nipple
from poor nipple
scratches are good a couple of tickles for the boy yeah you're back from españa
had some family time
how are you feeling okay yeah yeah happy to be back are you happy to be back
for real especially
because i saw you guys tried to replace me we didn't try we we did it we're
very we absolutely
did that guy was fantastic we found a wonder kid dude yeah yeah he's the best
the big c dynamic the
big c dude are you threatened i a little bit wow well did you you didn't edit
that episode did you
no but george did and you watched it did you watch it i did you did i know he
watched it like a sick
little weirdo just yeah he's not as good as me there is no way he is as good as
me yeah and he was
he was yeah yeah we yeah we uh we we flew him across the country just to
temporarily replace you but
nobody nobody bad friends no one can replace fancy b no we're happy he's back
he's back yeah
well so um the big c doesn't really know what food is i don't think he eats
yeah yeah i mean everything
we would we brought him to um john and vinnie's right yeah and everything was
like i don't like it
yeah yeah well the first thing you brought out was was it like a burrata or
something and he had no
fucking idea what that would have ever seen burrata before in his entire life
he thought it was a dead
ghost yeah an old ghost yeah and we had oh he hated the gem salad i'm sally
tonight by the way it's just
lettuce it's a caesar salad he hated it with a little spice in it so good yeah
he didn't like that and then um
what he did like was the anchovy pizza which is strange he loved it yeah no
there was no cheese on
it just red sauce and an anchovy stripped across it and he'd like that he was
like yeah that one is
pretty good i was like the fish pizza is good yeah you don't like any of the
other pizza he didn't
like the tagliatella he didn't like the he didn't like the he didn't like the
bronx bomber the meat
he's never had real pasta i think no he's never i think it's a little too chewy
for him or something
he went like this yeah yeah like a horse like trying to get rid of something
and then and then
the embrace afterwards were words was as if we were never going to see him
again well we're probably not
yeah no you know we do we i will say this yeah we do really i don't want to
give anything away
to the fans we are we do love the big c we like the big c we will see him again
i hope so we love him
yeah he is uh unique he's we got to get him some you know what some action i
think well i mean he he's
31 32 and then he hasn't had since the dominican republican head yeah in high
school 13 years which
i don't even believe do you believe that story or no i don't think he's really
had sex come on
come on what of course that's not real he's never had sex he wanted a vivid
detail about how it happened
yeah because he's been how she ran away how she ran away afterwards and ran
into the forest she was
able to cut the ropes escape into the woods and i was chasing her come back
here little girl yeah
it was a wild story he had an elaborate story because he because he's been broached
with this
subject many times people have said uh you know he's been around another guy
that's like hey you know you
working on anybody right now you got anybody on your roster no no not really i
had sex once in dominican
i think it's like it's not like you know what yeah let's not make fun of that i'm
not we're not
making let's go backwards i'm proud of him because he's saving himself for real
love
that's what he said at dinner he said he wants to he wants to meet real love i
think that's what they
all say well dude they all say that right it's either we take him to john and vitties
or
oh that's true that's true you won't you won't screw me yeah it did have feel
that like we should
be extra nice damn yeah i don't want to because we don't know we don't know i
don't want to read
about a westfield mall in jersey getting fucking lit up oh my god that would be
that would be the
end of our podcast he's wearing a bad friends merch shirt no tmz did you see
the mug shots of the guys
that robbed the louvre no this is unreal look at how hot these guys are are you
i'll be the judge
is this a movie well that's chase crawford no but they're saying he looks that's
him on the right
that guy wow look at his army hot welcome to hollywood yeah they're gonna cast
this guy as soon
you know what someone someone is gonna bust him out of jail and put him in a
movie yeah remember
the model remember like the hot model that was on like to be on like black
stuff we should make a
movie i got it we bust him out mangioni right yeah yeah i mean what were the
two brothers with the
boss that was the young brother from the boston marathon what's his name oh sarnia
we'll leave that
guy in there why he's cute though i know bring him is he yeah jeremy meeks he's
already an actor
now he's famous right he got like famous wow okay but go back to the mug shot
of the guy that robbed
the louvre i can't um i mean honestly though look at that guy's face yeah that
guy's a thief yeah look
at the neck proportions how easy would it be for this guy to get an older woman
who's rich to give
him money brother right you don't need to rob yeah you don't this what does it
say this is one of the
two right that's one of the two what's where's the other guy is the other guy
they keep showing him
so obviously the other guy is not uh no he's he's sexy too yeah is that big c i
went to paris to rob
i stole mona lisa why is that happening hot guys doing this why are hot guys
robbing yeah when you
you look at kyle rittenhouse hollywood's dead you're like you get it right yeah
you look at
rittenhouse you're like yeah but when hotties are doing it what's going on with
our world it's
diversity you know it's killing that stuff this is dei right dei is like enough
uggos we need to start
getting hot guys to rob right this is the this is the fucking this is the lib
contingency added again
oh my god they're hot so are they in trouble a little bit yeah oh they used a
crane to like
but they didn't kill anybody they didn't do it no they didn't do oh yeah that
crane company is from
from germany yeah their ads is like you know in and out faster whatever like
they're selling through
the roof well you might as well market use the marketing these guys stole a
crane and then they
hoisted uh the ladder up to the window dude it was in it's in broad daylight i
mean it was like in the
middle you can see it it's not like it was like hidden and sneaky they just put
the crane up to
the window walked in and came out and so they they got the merch merch yeah
well i mean not merch but
they got what at the loo what they got paintings and stuff what is it no just
jewels jewels they got
jewels our rudy jewels they stole she was in there then they got out and they
escaped and they escaped
and then the they they caught him but some rat on the run somebody ratted him
out oh the rat
who's the rat google the rat google the rat yeah wait wait go back i'm sorry i
want to see
that real fast it says the heist is valued at 88 million euros that's 102
million american wow
eight pieces of historic french jewelry the french who cares yeah no we love
the french we love the
friends they came this close to getting away i know that's amazing i would they
should have let him go
i would start small if i wanted to rob what would you rob well i would start
like back like my high
school days like kit kats and you know what i mean oh yeah yeah and then you
would you would still
like okay i got away with that and the next thing you would rob is like shoes
from pay less shoes or
something yeah right like i got loafers by the way that's why they went out of
business
oh yeah yeah everyone stole from that place oh the next one is you know if you
go to like san
francisco you went to the cvs or everything is locked up now you think i went
into a cvs in san
francisco i went from my hotel to the club to the hotel to the club oh i went
to a cvs i did not walk
outside we were both in san francisco and yeah the cvs you know how in la half
the things are locked up
at san francisco cvs right it's all toothpicks locked up well those are weapons
yeah oh yeah that's
how they broke into the louvre yeah i mean everything yeah but but i will say
the city
bengay locked up well i buy a lot of bengay i'll tell you this it's funny that
it's locked up up there
what chips yeah it's crazy and then there's so many of those buttons who loves
chips i wonder
all of us yeah all of all love chips yeah and then there's one person some poor
filipino lady where
you have to she just happened to be but you know you're pressing the button but
you have to imagine
there's 40 buttons being pressed throughout the help she's the key master she's
got 50 000 keys
around her neck just running through the like yeah what about this why don't
you just get one guy per aisle
yeah you know what i mean like hey dude i'm the you know what i mean deodorant
guy i'm the cereal
boy yeah you'll be cereal i'll be doing and i have all the deodorant keys right
mccone i don't know
what you do okay uh what's going on are you stunned what's going on i thought
he was going to tell
me what i was going to do no he's he doesn't i was giving you the option i'm
the cvs
manager i go what do you what do you want what do you want to do like what
aisle do you want i do the
condoms oh okay give him the condoms why because you don't use them yeah it'd
be fun to monitor that
one versus the other ones keep an eye speaking of mccone and love i uh was
introduced to a new
friend of his recently it ended later that evening never mind wait you found
love and then you ended
it well i met up we went to the dodger game and uh we afterwards i said hey we're
gonna walk down the
hill because you can't get a uber i was like we're gonna walk over the hill and
probably go to shortstop
or grab a beer just hang out and then so we went to little joy and i said come
meet us and this guy
this is how nervous he was in front of this girl i haven't seen him like this
in a long time
i was pretty hammered and i was just giving him cash just handing him cash like
get her a drink
get her go get her food and he was nervous i could tell because when he showed
up late i go where did
you go he was late he goes i thought you said little boy i'm like there is no
little boy there's no
little boy bar dude there's little joy and it's literally across from your
house
well you know what i did what'd you do on the flight to san francisco there was
a
attendant a flight attendant she was beautiful so i wrote her a letter oh yeah
restraining order now
no more delta flight the guy next to me fancy is back yeah i was sitting next
to the uh a businessman
excuse me sir do you have a pen he's like yes young man i have a pen he gives
me the pen so i take
the um you know the throw up back barf bag the barf bag love note right and i
wrote this like you're
so pretty and you know here's my number this and that my instagram everything
right yeah nothing
what did you check your requests and all that stuff i checked it i've been
checking it for days
but did you get her name was her name on her name tag no no that would have
been a that would have been
i i looked at the you know when you do dms you're not a single guy but i know i
i you know i go through
what you know what i mean you siphoned through i siphoned through all the the
uh profile pitch
pictures yeah nothing yeah and you know and you take a risk like t