Name: Big Jay Oakerson Got SHAMED at A Fancy Restaurant - Are You Garbage
Uploaded: 2024-12-16T21:15:54.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Big Jay Oakerson Got SHAMED at A Fancy Restaurant - Are You Garbage' from Are You Garbage Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-12-16. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Big Jay Oakerson Got SHAMED at A Fancy Restaurant - Are You Garbage' from Are You Garbage Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-12-16. Transcript available.

me and christine went to the southampton or something for a weekend it was my
birthday time
and we went to my birthday time what are you 11. it's my birthday time my
birthday weekend i guess
what are you middle-aged black lady it's my birthday month it was the month my
whole month
birthday time birthday time so birthday time was there in the hamptons and she
goes um let's go
somewhere to eat we'll go out to eat for your birthday so we picked this place
it was called
east hampton grill shout out them they suck dick they uh i can't wear my
bathing suit food was pretty
good though but uh we looked up is there like a dress code for this place
because i had
well i didn't pack anything i didn't know we were going to go to dinner to a
nice place
so i didn't pack anything for it so i was like oh let's just like make sure
wherever we go just
doesn't have a good dress yeah a little more cash or call you know what i mean
and ask and
we looked all over this website for this restaurant called they said it was
fine and then when
we showed up we asked that when i walked in and we kind of said like hey we
have a reservation for
two or whatever i was like they'll tell me right there and there if they would
be like sir you have
to have my word listen at the front desk i would have been quietly like oh okay
i'm sorry i didn't
know the website didn't say i wouldn't have fought for it or made a scene i'd
have been like all right
tell me my mobile my mo walk's no good around here
are you telling me you're looking me in the face right now
you what the hell kind of joint is it got something against nose rings lady
oh no neck tattoos in your establishment okay princess i didn't realize this
was a meeting
of dignitaries i'm sorry i can't bring my dog in here
i can't i ride a mastiff in with a cypress hills shirt i think i was wearing a
cypress hill shirt
this place is full of losers anyway i was gonna say the list of things that you
can't wear to get
into a club that you would see i would say 90 of the time that's what you're
wearing it's tim's
yeah unlaced him it's unlaced a baseball hat on backwards no cock to the side
not totally the
side maybe looking like uh what do you call that northeast sure as the crow
flies some sort of
sports memorabilia it's possible tank top jean shorts exposed tattoos exposed
tattoos um
where were we in this even i thought i was supposed to wear this stuff i'm
sorry i'll take you back
i think you were about to get thrown out of a restaurant you're doing burnouts
at the east
you're laying wheels oh oh yeah we go in we say that's a chocolate fountain not
an ashtray
excuse me thank you sir no smoking in here you're leaning at the door you're
like i'm not even inside
dick dick do they kick oh shit they uh we walked into the reservation they didn't
say anything they
were like yeah we'll be give us 15 minutes or whatever uh went outside ripped
the butt by the
heater by the big outside man that is that is that is a dirt bag of fucking
nice toasty though and then
they said here's your table we walked and then as i'm walking by i was like i'm
a little nervous then
i saw guys in there in sweatpants which i would never have done i wouldn't go
to dinner in sweatpants
gentlemen uh a guy in shorts and like a t-shirt and uh which i was wearing
shorts also yes so um
nice jordans though and then uh we sit down the table we go i even notice i go
oh look christine
that's chris cuomo over there we're eating at a place where chris cuomo's
eating okay uh we have
dinner it's pretty good uh we get dessert to go and uh huh why it's full it was
my birthday time wrap up
some of those rolls so you're gonna wait so you're gonna have the you're gonna
have to dessert later
at back at the hotel airbnb i picture him i'll do the uh soft pretzel medium
well please me and christine
were taking those epic at the time so we were full quick and so but we wanted
dessert so we uh we brought
back to the place but when we were leaving i ago when we ordered the dessert to
go i was like oh
here too i gave my card and i was like you just bring the check uh whenever you're
ready and he was
like okay he comes out and he drops the check with my credit card and a little
business card that says
this is pre-prepared that's how they're gonna say this they go we hope you
enjoyed uh dining with
this we would just appreciate next time if you would observe our what our our
rules of uh
attire attire yeah clothes and i was like what and i tipped i know it wasn't
the waiter's fault
but i so i tipped him fine but i said to the guy i was like who what is this
like who tells you to do
this and he was like uh oh the manager common sense and decorum this goes so
hilarious we're in a
society this goes so funny i wish the story ended in me being awesome um i mean
they're still jerko
they suck for sure this because then the waitress comes out she goes oh no it
wasn't meant to if
you were offended by it i didn't mean for you to be what i go i would have
called me a bum i mean like
yeah i'm like here's the thing if you told me when i came in there's a dress
code and we can't let you
in i would have left and understood you can't serve me take my money and then
when you're asking
to tip a guy uh have him lay down a car you put him in a situation i'm like lay
on a card that says
like by the way you look like shit fix that next time and they were like well i'm
sorry you're just
doing a lot of i sorry you feel that way yeah yeah i'm sorry you feel that way
and i was it was a it
was a woman so i bitch i eventually this is the two things christine had to sit
there and keep a
straight face for i went i wish you were a dude so i could slap you in your
dumb fucking face
and then man we get hurt so quick i was hurt yeah i thought people i would have
said you were
sitting backwards on the chair like if you were a dude i would slap you right
in your fucking face
and then uh she goes i understand i go oh understand this i've got a national
radio
show on sirius xm so a lot of people will be hearing about this oh my god i
walked right
outside and lit a cigarette went that was hey you'll be hearing about this you
just
with the wrong bull you're gonna hear about this on radio you forgot your
dessert you had to walk
back in and grab them also where's my where's my seven layer cake
i'll be taking my crumbu lay home i went home i said dumb
shit i look like a fucking bum to christine on my birthday time right around my
birthday time
the balloons hanging off your chair didn't help
i mean dude that is an all-time bozo move whoa i get it but you have a radio
show and they're
gonna about well it was very like sure you do sir yeah yes yes we'll be tuning
in yes yes i do um
um naturally syndicated it's so funny we get hurt but the weirdest thing the
how many things i can walk
away from versus like that was just again it's the it's the lack of justice in
like the way they
again in my mind i'm like i walk into these places going like we were saying
earlier you're like all
right it's i'm not supposed to be here yeah bounce me out of here what was the
bill can i ask you that
two three hundred you're drinking right you have cocktails we're trying to
think yeah
you're drinking as hard as lipped in heart yeah four hundred bucks probably
and the waiter's got to come over and give that before you sign with the with
the and this is how
much it costs and this is the suggested yeah now fuck that if you have the
money
fuck all of that if you have the money to spend they go hey you're here you
belong here you got the
fucking cash and you were nice enough to call ask that yeah fuck no yeah they
were shitty that's
crazy east hampton grill with a 400 bill it was so i was like damn and i said
like i tipped the guy
like good on it and it was just like i said what he was apologetic almost when
we kind of even mentioned
he was just kind of hoping he just dropped it with that way like maybe this won't
ever say anything
about it again i'm like oh we'll say something again are my national radio
program have you seen my
dye hair you think i'm letting this die right now so the so the lady the
manager probably made him do
it i would assume oh yes yeah absolutely but i was like what a weird fucking
thing to go and
salt and fucking do them yeah yeah hey we let him in already but uh go and salt
it's on the website
i'm looking dog to whom it may concern apparently got a good scallop salad
going oh oh listen the food
wasn't the issue at all food was good here's big j's review i have a national
radio dj
no pigs in the blanket what's the deal yeah this place sucks where'd you get
all this where'd you get
all this food trader joe's you call yourself a grill when i get a dirty shirley
i want three cherries
you don't even have jack daniels sauce sir we can't call it that legally it's
called bourbon sauce
i like when it's jack daniels no little swords in the drinks i'm out
skip it by the way how much i don't order a martini if they don't have blue
cheese olives
the bacon stuff blue i go do you guys have blue cheese olives i think if they
go now sorry i go
it's positive diet coke it'll drive me back to a diet coke really i'll do a
regular i'll do i'll do
a martini with regular olives and a side of blue cheese wait that'll stop speckling
my olives
can you make sure these things are pitted wait that'll keep me from drinking a
martini yeah we go
back to diet coke yeah then i have to think about what i'm doing next oh shit i
only had one
move here well martini is kind of the drink i'll get at a if i go to a steakhouse
i do a manhattan i
go give me a manhattan they go what do you want whatever you give it to yeah a
nice restaurant i'll do
a martini because it's a lot of booze that's my first one shot it's a lot of
booze and it's kind
of easy to get down if you get it extra dirty i love it i love them get you
warm quick yes i love
them and so i'll bang out uh two of those at a steakhouse dinner feel nice okay
that's my first
move baby but if there's no blue cheese olives i'm back down to diet coke and i'm
thinking about
like maybe i don't drink tonight that's crazy to me because i was only going to
have two anyway and
it's like it's not going to be blue cheese olives though and then it's all
those little weird ice
chips and i'll tell you what a classy place though will give you a little ramekin
of olive juice next
to it they go you make it out dirty you want i don't think you i've you've
ordered a lot of dirty
martini i don't think you've ever gotten that i have i've i've asked for a side
of a side of uh
oh wow that feels as good as when they give you the rest of the milkshake i
meant from it they give
me the shaker sometimes you gotta finish it off i don't mind that either