Name: Nate Bargatze's Secret Fast Food Addiction | Are You Garbage
Uploaded: 2024-12-26T20:45:52.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Nate Bargatze's Secret Fast Food Addiction | Are You Garbage' from Are You Garbage Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-12-26. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Nate Bargatze's Secret Fast Food Addiction | Are You Garbage' from Are You Garbage Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-12-26. Transcript available.

Okay, how do you feel about the rotisserie chicken?
I like it.
I'm not the biggest chicken fan.
Chicken was all we ate.
Sure.
But I like rotisserie chicken.
Well, you know you keep it tight now.
You do real good with what you eat and all that kind of stuff.
Oh, not now.
Really?
I'm in a really bad spot right now.
Really?
Hit us.
Let's talk.
Oh, yeah.
You come to the right place.
Yeah.
What's your poison?
Well, I mean, I had McDonald's last night.
Last night, I was hungry, and then I was like,
I went to this ice cream place because in New York, ice cream is like.
What spot?
I forget the name of it.
But it was like 1115, and there's an ice cream place open.
It's almost like, well, why would you live anywhere else?
Yeah, yeah, exactly.
So then I go there, have ice cream, hot fudge, the whole thing.
Wow.
But then I haven't really eaten, so then I'm starving,
and I'm walking back, and there's a McDonald's.
And so I was like, well, I might as well get McDonald's.
And then so I got number two, no onions.
Number two, no onions, two cheeseburgers.
Well, I don't think it's, yeah, but it's number seven now.
Gotcha.
I think the number two now is a quarter pounder.
I'm more, but I like a Big Mac, number one, no onions.
You don't like the onions?
Is it because you don't like onions?
I don't like onions.
Yeah.
Okay.
I went to McDonald's.
I like that.
I mean, they're really good.
Yeah, yeah.
But McDonald's would be my, yeah.
But I get, I get fast food every day.
I mean.
And it's McDonald's is the number one for you?
McDonald's is number one.
Taco Bell.
We have a Sonic near us.
I do a Sonic.
Okay.
I like a Sonic and a Great Ice.
Well, obviously.
They, yeah, those are probably the.
So this is when you're home.
You'll, you'll, you'll be out in the car.
You'll, you'll hit a Sonic.
Yeah.
Oh, I'll do it at home.
I'll order it at home.
It's, I'm in a, I mean, I'm a mess.
You're ordering fast food to the house?
Oh, yeah.
I have a door, I doordash.
I mean, uh, I doordash.
I just.
What's the missus say about that?
Are you getting something for the whole family or are you just like.
No, usually it's embarrassing.
I'm embarrassed by it.
I do it later.
But, uh.
Wait, you can pull that off.
You could be at the house with the family and be like, hey, I'm going to order
some, uh,
Sonic.
Well, if you get in a, if you threaten to hit your wife right after.
No, I'm joking.
I threaten to leave the family.
I go, what'd you say?
No.
What about the, aren't the kids like, yeah, I want to do it.
I want something too.
Oh, yeah, yeah.
Yeah, my daughter wants something.
But, you know, sometimes I order, if I'll get, a lot of times I'll get a Sonic
Blast, a
Blizzard, uh, some kind of ice cream and I'll order that and I, but I'll do it
late enough
so it's like, she'll be at the bed and then I get it sent.
Sometimes, you know, they set it up on the.
In the notes, do not ring the doorbell.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I'll meet you down the block.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I set it right on the, uh, set it right on the steps.
I mean, that's top level garbage.
Quietly and, yeah.
Uh, I've thrown my way.
I've thrown my trash away.
In another trash.
I'll do that.
If I eat something out during the day that I don't want my wife to know about.
Uh-huh.
Uh, I've paid cash.
Uh-huh.
And then I, yeah.
And then I've, I've thrown it away at, uh, uh, like a gas, I'll go to a gas
station.
You told anybody about this, I'll kill you.
And get rid of it.
Yeah, go to a gas station.
Act like you're about to get gas, but you don't.
You just hop out, throw all your food away.
That's real fat guy tendencies.
You know that, right?
No, no.
It's, it's bad.
Oh, yeah, yeah.
It's bad.
Yeah.
I'm a mess right now.
I'm truly, like, uh, I'm talking to someone about it.
Because it's, like, that big of a-
So am I.
Yeah.
Talking to you about it.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, right here we're all, yeah.
It's not good.
Yeah.
Group therapy.
Oh, yeah.
Huh.
I, I, I, I, I, I, cause I, I think it's the, we did not, like I said, we didn't
cook.
I don't know how to cook.
So, uh, cooking was never even to now not been, like, a big thing.
So it's, like, I just go to the, I can only think of, if I'm starving, I can't
think,
well, I'll just make this.
I only think, well, I'll just go, what's the quickest way to go get it?
Yeah.
And then my brain, like, you know, when I live, even when I lived in New York,
we'd
go to the Applebee's right about, right here in Times Square.
Uh, Caroline's was right there.
And then, so we got, and, but it was in-
Eating good in the neighborhood.
Yeah.
I could only, like, I, I would think in chain restaurants.
So if I'm hungry, I kind of think of a chain restaurant first.
I don't think of a restaurant that's, like, a cool restaurant.
Do you have a favorite chain of those casual dining establishments where you're,
like,
whoo, and Outback?
Yeah, we've been going, yeah, we'll go to Outback.
You know, once you start doing better, once we start doing better, Outback
pretty much.
I thought he was like, well, you guys will have Outback money one day.
Yeah.
That's what I thought you were like.
Once you guys start doing better, Outback.
Yeah.
That's when you, that's when you made it.
Wait, so like, say-
You eat a Bloomin' Onion, you don't even worry about how much it costs.
Do you, will you eat a Bloomin' Onion?
I will, yeah.
But you don't like onions?
I can't eat a fried onion.
I'm with you.
Yeah.
I'm with you.
That's real dirt because it's fried.
Yeah, that's real.
It's not an onion.
It's not a vegetable.
It's fried.
Yeah, yeah.
So, say you're home, you have a week off or whatever, I know you're very busy,
and you
and the kids and the missus are going to go out and get something to eat.
Is that where you're going?
You'll go to, like, an Outback?
We'll go to, yeah.
We'll go to Outback or, I mean, we'll try to go, sometimes go out.
If we go out to eat, go to a newer restaurant in Nashville.
So, we do try to try the stuff.
My wife does like different foods, but it-
She likes nice stuff.
She likes nice stuff.
And then, but, yeah, overall, it's like, me and her, we met at Applebee's.
We were here?
No, in Nashville.
No kidding.
Yeah, so, and we worked there together.
You worked at an Applebee's?
Yeah, Applebee's.
Wow.
And then, so that's where we met before I started comedy.
Yeah.
I've been wanting to come on this podcast for a while.
I know, I know, yeah.
I know, we were like, I was like, I mean,
you've said yes to every single thing.
It's nuts, dude.
And then, you're like, yeah, but wait, there's more.
That's every answer.
Oh, we met at an Applebee's.
Yeah.
You met at an Applebee's.
Oh, you like Applebee's?
I used to live in an Applebee's.
That's crazy.
Okay.
Do you like a lot of, like, do you, if you, I mean, you're doing well.
Like, if you guys go to, like, a nice place, are you trying?
Like, will you have, like, foie gras or anything like that?
You know what?
I will try stuff.
Okay.
Yeah.
So, I am somewhat a pick eater, but I will try anything.
Okay.
What's your move at Applebee's, generally?
We'd always get chicken, broccoli Alfredo.
What?
Nick's the broccoli.
You're just doing chicken Alfredo at Applebee's?
I'd say either, I'd say put the broccoli on the side so they think I'm going to
eat it.
Throw it out later.
Yeah, then I would just be.
Go to a gas station and throw it out?
Yeah, throw it out, yeah.
I was never here.
I'd walk around the restaurant with the plate and try to find someone not
looking and dump
it in the trash.
You're doing chicken Alfredo at Applebee's.
Chicken Alfredo at Applebee's.
Did you do a starter there, too?
Chinese chicken salad.
He said he didn't like chicken.
I know.
I know.
Well, I don't actually like chicken in my salad.
The Chinese chicken salad, it's the last thing it is is a salad.
I know, but it's so good.
It's got the wonton crisps and stuff in it in the sweet dressing.
Woo-wee!
What did you say?
Will you do the potato skins?
Yeah, I like potato skins.
Get out!
Yeah.
Ladies and gentlemen, groundbreaking news here on RU Garbage.
No onions.
John Q America.
I got no onions, ketchup on them.
Uh-huh.
Warm ketchup.
Yeah, warm ketchup.
I'm a gentleman.
Okay.
Yeah, yeah.
I put, and this is another, I'm not trying to do my act, but I just have, I
talk about this
stuff a lot.
Of course.
But I had, because I use a lot of ketchup, and so, and I use so much that a guy
walked
over and said, that's a lot of ketchup.
He had to say it to me.
Hey, buddy.
He goes, hey, man, that's a bunch of ketchup.
A lot of nitrates in there.
Yeah, it's very uncomfortable, because I was like, I just want to eat my
ketchup.
That's why if I can get alone with some ketchup, it's dangerous.
It's bad?
It's bad.
I can go.
Ketchup on a baked potato, you don't see that a lot.
I'm a big fan of it.
Yeah.
Well, just not on a regular baked potato, but potato skins.
Potato skins.
Gotcha.
Yeah.
Okay.
Wow.