Name: Kam Patterson's HILARIOUS Dad is Hustling Him on The Road!
Uploaded: 2025-02-23T21:05:01.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Kam Patterson's HILARIOUS Dad is Hustling Him on The Road!' from Are You Garbage Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2025-02-23. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Kam Patterson's HILARIOUS Dad is Hustling Him on The Road!' from Are You Garbage Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2025-02-23. Transcript available.

How often do you go back and see your mom?
I try to go as much as possible.
I'm going there in March, so I'll probably go back there.
Okay.
But I try to get to see her as much as I can.
My dad on the road with me every weekend.
My dad always comes.
Your dad goes on the road with you?
Yeah, he do the merch.
Your dad sells your merch?
Get the fuck out of here.
Yeah, he said, my sister said the merch.
I love that.
Whoa.
That's sick, dude.
Yeah, but he always go, I'm robbing you.
He don't even get no robbing you.
Ryan does our merch and he robs us for sure.
That's awesome.
It's funny because my dad be coming up and he be having polo suits on and shit.
I'm like, where are you getting all this money from?
He always go, my investment paid off.
Yeah.
Dragging your ass around for 20 years.
That's great.
So your dad goes everywhere with you?
Everywhere I go, yeah.
Oh, that's fucking awesome.
How old's your dad, by the way?
He's 65.
Damn.
Yeah.
Gotcha.
What a fucking nice back half of the life.
Yeah.
Roll with your fucking comic son, hanging out at fucking clubs and shit.
He loves it, man.
Boy, we was butting heads by these meet and greets, dude, boy.
We ready to go to work.
Why?
Because most of the merch money go to him.
So if I don't go do the meet and greet, then they don't buy as much merch.
So he's like, bring your ass out as soon as you get on stage.
I'm like, I can't sit here for five minutes.
No.
They waiting on you.
It's like, I call him Joe Jackson without the belt.
That's crazy, dude.
Yeah, yeah.
He's pimping you out.
No, for real.
Get out here and start fucking dancing.
He was a hoe.
Damn.
Make the money.
Trying to go backstage, get your head on straight, have a soda or something
like that.
That's crazy.
My dad knock on the door.
Hey, what we doing?
What's the play?
You sitting down?
Too long.
He tell my dog, Joey, blah, Joey, get five minutes.
Because those minutes are crucial to the people hanging out.
But you also need to go, whew, all right, let's go, let's like, let me get my
fucking
head together.
Let me get a drink of water or something.
Get your head to go meet a bunch of people.
But some people, see, if you're walking out and you're not there, they're like,
I'm just
fucking going.
Yeah, and I tell them all the time, I'm like, listen, thank them for coming out.
But if they don't want to wait like 10, 15 minutes, they ain't no one to see me
that
bad.
You see me?
All right.
Good head on your shoulder.
What's the split of the merch with your dad?
What the?
He just, whatever?
I'd be like, let me send you some money.
He'd be like, all right, what else you need?
No, man, that's a fucking, that's a good gig, dude.
That is not happening with you.
Yeah, nah, he, because of my positive shit, I'll always be like, hey, y'all
tell me like,
you know what I'm saying, I'm going to let you know when the investment has
been paid
off.
I don't think that's ever going to happen.
Nah, nah, nah, nah.
He's got, he's got it.
You probably want to get some eyes on that.
I'm sure you move a good amount of t-shirts on a weekend.
Nah, it'd be a lot.
My dad, my sister be coming up with these Louis Vuitton.
What's going on here, man?
Oh, shit.
What's y'all making over there, man?
I'm making some real bread over here.
Got new cops, new TV.
You get on a plane to go back and coach, your dad's up in first class.
See you in the front, son.
See you in a minute.
Remember, five minutes.
Damn.
I mean, think about it.
You were at Publix not that long ago, and then you're here.
So it's like the jump from my son works at Publix to my son selling out
weekends is a fucking
jump.
He was always like the catalyst of like the whole dream.
So my mama, let my mama see the best.
When I told her I wanted to do stand-up, she wasn't on board at all.
Sure.
And so she came out.
I went to my dad's house, and my dad was like, you got a couch?
You got a year?
And I forgot he lent you the car at night?
Yeah, he lent me the car.
He deserves the merch money.
So I wouldn't even be like, what's up with the money?
Yeah.
You know, you feel me?
That's pretty good.
This is dope.
And then they always, like the people I got around me keep me on my, like, just
keep me
on a clear space.
Like my pops and my sister, and I started with.
Yeah, it's great.
You get your dad on the road, you can't get in too much trouble.
Yeah, I can't.
No, he the problem.
Yeah, he's probably out running around.
He's an issue, man.
I remember the other day, so grab me with me.
He's like Drake's dad.
He's in the video and shit.
Bro, I'll never forget.
Y'all got a mark over there?
Can I get a marker?
My dad, bro, I swear to God, no lie.
So the girls don't want me to sign their titties and shit, right?
And so my dad will see that and they go, what?
And so he'll, like, I remember the other day, he had a, he had a, I was signing
a titty
and I look back.
How many titties would you say you're signing?
On a weekend?
Probably like six, seven.
That's a lot of titties, man.
I was signing a titty.
I looked at my dad.
My dad had a marker like this.
What the pray is?
I'm going to sign one, too.
He's fucking insane, man.
Like, I'll be like, it's possible.
You got to chill the fuck out.
It's a case.
Signing titties.
He was talking to this one girl.
Damn, dude.
And my dad, like, 6'4".
He's, like, 300 pounds.
He don't realize he, like, he a menacing dude.
That's also security.
You're on with security.
Nah, he can't help for fuck.
I know, but I'm just saying he's big enough to, like, get fucking, nobody wants
to take
a run at you.
Man, how proud of a dad do you got to be?
Three years ago, working at Publix.
He's watching you sign titties, like, yeah.
I did it.
My dog had the funny story.
We did, I did Cobbs in San Francisco.
They put my name on the marquee.
And then my dad was walking up with my dog.
He was like, he said, look at that shit up there, boy.
He said, my dog said, yeah, St. Cam Patterson.
He said, man, fuck that.
That shit St. Patterson.
Oh, yeah.
Hell, yeah.
Yeah, that's sick.
That's awesome, man.
What a come up.
Damn, dude.
That's awesome.