Name: The BEST New York Pizza w/ History Hyenas
Uploaded: 2025-03-07T17:01:15.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'The BEST New York Pizza w/ History Hyenas' from Are You Garbage Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2025-03-07. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'The BEST New York Pizza w/ History Hyenas' from Are You Garbage Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2025-03-07. Transcript available.

All right, let's say you're at a pizza shop, you know, in the neighborhood
joint,
and you want a slice of pepperoni.
Do you point at the slice you want?
Is it okay to call out the slice you want and go, give me that slice?
Yeah.
Are you okay with that?
That's a very New York thing.
Yeah, I'll say that.
I'll say, you know, obviously, if it's Pete's regular slice,
I'll just say, can I get a regular?
That's it, not a fucking plain slice with cheese or anything.
Plain slice with cheese, that's exactly how you know somebody moved to the city.
We say, well, in Philly, I grew up as plain.
No, you get a plain slice of plain.
We wouldn't say that.
Nobody would say slice of plain.
You'd say regular.
I would say just give me a regular, give me a regular, or give me a Sicilian,
which is, you know, one of the square ones.
And then if it's a pepperoni, you say pepperoni,
but then sometimes they have, like, these mystery slices.
I'll just say, give me one of those.
Give me one of them.
And then you just point at that.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And two of them and not.
When it comes to the Sicilian, are you saying, give me a corner,
give me a middle, give me a side?
That's very normal in New York.
And what is your preference?
I like a middle.
You like middle?
Like a nice, fluffy middle, yeah.
That's the Greek in them.
That ain't good.
I mean, I like a corner because I'm a respectable unit.
Give me a corner.
What the fuck are we doing here?
But I respect it.
It's a Sicilian.
Yeah.
It's a Sicilian.
Let me get a corner of Sicilian.
Can I get a regular?
Or you could go, can I get a slice?
If you say, can I get a slice?
They know what you mean.
Sure.
It's a plain slice.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
For sure.
I mean, we're going to get pizza on the walk.
Yeah, now I want a slice.
When Yanni says, the first time we were on the show, we asked you, what do you
like, plain
slice?
I hear that in my head every time I get a piece of pizza.
Nobody eats pizza like this guy.
I've seen him eat eight, nine in a sitting easy.
It just makes me hungry.
It's true.
It's really true.
And you said it the best, funniest way.
He said, you eat an alarming amount of pizza.
Alarming.
It's the word I used.
Have either of you, speaking of pizza, been to Chrissy's Pizza over in Greenpoint?
No.
Good.
Chrissy Pizza, shout out to him.
A buddy of ours now, but a fan of the show, originally how we introduced him.
An artist.
He started off making them during the pandemic in his apartment in Queens.
Action Bronson somehow.
He made some buzz.
Action Bronson found him, made it, and now he blew up.
And he's got his own joint out there.
Shout out Chrissy's Pizza.
Boys, you will love it.
Chrissy, hit up Chrissy and he'll go, hey.
It's very, he'll be like, I can get you.
You got to come pick it up at three.
No slices.
That's her thing.
No slices.
Pies.
He does three or four.
He doesn't got a lot of pies.
Looks good.
They're great.
Yummy, yummy in my tummy.
You got to go in.
I just did it.
You got to go in.
You say, hey, I'm picking up for Chris or whoever.
Like, he'll call in or he'll be there.
You got to take care of the staff.
Boom, hit the staff.
Yeah.
Hit them all.
Hit them heavy.
You got to hit them?
No, grease them.
You grease them a little bit so they give you the pizza.
Grease everybody.
I grease them heavy.
I said, hey, no.
Wait, you tip the pizza guys?
Yeah.
Of course.
Dude, first of all, there's some.
You tip pizza guys?
Of course.
It's also a hookup.
There's like a three-hour wait.
Oh.
And I get it.
He texted me, just go, your pies will be ready right at three.
Oh, okay.
I thought, like, in a tip jar.
He went down one, he's acting like he's Joe Pesci.
I just said I went one time.
Yeah, he was describing it that way.
You were describing it.
You guys seem a little jealous for me.
Okay.
I'll tell you what, one of the biggest honors of my entire life, especially a
kid from Queens,
there's a restaurant in Queens on Metropolitan Avenue called Dee's Pizza.
Shout out, Dee's Pizza on Metro, one of the best, I think the best food in the
neighborhood.
They named the pizza after me.
The Chrissy Dee's.
Wow.
It was literally like, that's when you feel like, okay, I'm doing something.
We also have, in Bay Ridge, we have the chicken cuzzlet.
We have a chicken cuzzlet sandwich named after us.
That's how you know.
Either of you have your picture on the wall at a pizza place.
He does.
I got mine at a big one, Prince Street Pizza.
Yeah, huge.
You made it.
That's why I think, like, you don't mean.
But it says history hyenas, though.
You just weren't there.
No, no, it doesn't.
I think it's just you.
No, it says Chrissy Dee history hyenas.
Oh.
Yeah.
Well, look, then even, it's not a picture of me, but I'm done.
My whole goal was to be up in a pizza place.
I mean, that's huge.
Johnny's in a dry cleaner than New Rojell.
Carvolta's got a picture in every pizza place in the city.
That's what it is.
That's a big, big, big moment.
I always wonder, like, Italians who get upset about, like, the stereotypes of
everyone calling
the mafia and stuff, it's like, yeah, well, maybe if not every Italian
restaurant had
every single mob actor up in the hallway to the bathroom.
I mean, you guys are doing the stereotype to yourself.
Yeah, maybe if the owner with Chaz Palmitari, and then he's sitting there with
fucking
big pussy from Surprise.
They'll have that last supper of all of them drawn together.
Yeah, it's like Scarface.
Maybe if the best pizzeria on Staten Island wasn't named Goodfellas.
Yeah, yeah.
That's literally what it's called.
Yeah.
You go to Uncle Vinny's, it's a guy with a Tommy gun in the back of the fucking
thing.
Well, why are you stereotyping this?
You know, we're not all in the mob.
Yeah, and then meanwhile, there's fucking the fake bullet holes behind your
head at Uncle
Vinny's.
Sure.
This guy's serving penny vodka that he's making in the back to the customers
like it's
his Nona's house.
Yeah, it's like maybe you guys are owning that stereotype a little bit.
Sure, that's a good point.
I never thought about it that way.
Yeah.