Name: Ozempic Burps on a Plane! on MSSP w/ Shane Gillis & Matt McCusker
Uploaded: 2025-03-28T16:00:12.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Ozempic Burps on a Plane! on MSSP w/ Shane Gillis & Matt McCusker' from Are You Garbage Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2025-03-28. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Ozempic Burps on a Plane! on MSSP w/ Shane Gillis & Matt McCusker' from Are You Garbage Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2025-03-28. Transcript available.

Malaysian Airline, everyone thinks they went in the ocean.
What if they went into outer space?
Well, that's crazy that we never even hear on to something.
Haven't stopped the asteroid. Why?
Exactly. Yeah, maybe that's what they're doing.
We're going to find out in 2032 Malaysian Airlines.
How pissed would you be?
You're on a vacation.
That's how they pull you like fuck what the outer space.
Yeah, you got six pairs of underwear with me to be furious.
How do you bring it up?
NXIVM?
I'm going to have wicked art burn up there.
He's brutal to travel with.
Constantly needs to do laundry.
Fucking ozemic burp on a plane.
Oh, I think about I think about that.
Oh, I thought the toilet was broken because we got all the guys like,
it's not really flushing right.
And we were in the front row, so I'm like, God damn it.
Fucking smells like shit.
I'm like, I'm like, this is the whole flight.
I'm going to fucking airlines fall apart.
Dude, then we get down here, we're out front of the mothership.
This is like last year when we're out front of the mothership.
We see people are like, yo, are you garbage?
Like, so we're like talking to them smells like sewage out there.
I just think that's six street.
You know what I mean?
And it's just like a fucking three weeks after mothership open.
We're sitting at the bar having a beer before our spots.
And I'm like, the plumbing in this place too?
What the fuck?
The three places I had been with them in a row.
I'm like this sewage.
God damn.
And he goes, you smell that?
I go, how the fuck can't you?
He's like, that's me.
I was like.
And then he's like, do you think the van smelled that?
I was like, sure, but the only septic tank put in me.
The only good thing is no one would ever think that's human.
So like, no one's ever going to go.
That's fully.
They're like, there's a sort of like shit.
We were talking to those guys that's external influence.
That's a real thing.
Then it was empty burps.
Yeah, it's so bad.
Yeah, because some people, they don't get the side effects that bad.
We're talking to Mike Eaton hosted the other night and he was he was saying
that I was at the kid get him.
He was.
He's got a guy here.
We had host the show at the pop up show at the creek was doing street.
Fucking Ozempic.
He gets it from like a guy.
Oh, but he said he doesn't have problems with it.
I know people that did our problems with it.
I had it so bad.
We're like shit would just it just stops your stomach.
Yeah.
So my shit would just sit in there and fester like the sarlacc pit.
Just fucking bubbling up is brutal.
And dude, it was the burps were so fucking bad.
We were worse than the farts, which is crazy.
Well, I had a real bad me and my wife flew to Greece and we came back and I got
jammed
up at customs and it was like an hour and a half line.
And it was like every 30 seconds.
I was like trying to do the fat girl blow out the side.
I would hear.
I started to hear the people behind me go, what the fuck?
So I started every time I would do it, I'd go, what the fuck you guys?
That's crazy.
So I got some bad meat in their bag or something.
It sucked.
Oh, my God.
The only one that ever smelled it was Ari.
He was the only one brave enough.
I was like, you're the only one I can answer this to.
Would you want to smell one?
He's like, yeah, go ahead.
Hey, you don't want any more of it.
You don't want the smoke.
It's like rotten eggs, dude.
You're a dragon.
You're a dragon.
A proper dragon.
Dragon's breath.
Oh, yeah.
Go ahead.
Yeah, it sucks.
And you were in line for it.
What was that?
They were customs.
Oh, my God, I would have fucking killed myself if somebody was burping shit.
And we were the customs line is maybe my least favorite place when you land at
JFK.
Oh, just fucking Afghanistan.
Airlines just got off next to you.
That's coming off worse than I want it to.
But you know what I mean?
You should have lifted listed like in fucking Norway and also Iceland airs.
Australia's flows motherfuckers, too.
I do get mad when the when the international lines moving faster than the
American line.
Yeah, what are we doing here?
It's like I pay my taxes type shit.
Really? Yeah.
It gets you in the fucking gut.
But we were only moving in small increments, so I couldn't even like do it.
You couldn't get away.
Now, bad had a plea.
Keep that up for an hour and a half.
Oh, sipping a ginger ale praying it would go away in your belly.
Get some carbonation in there.
Get those burps really going.
Kill this.
Get that real ginger in there.
Just floating around.
Yeah.
But when you would take you when you that was like when you were off, you were
coming off
of two weeks in fucking Greece, so you're eating like a fucking mania.
It's a better diet when he would stay on top of it.
It was a little better.
But when like on the road, it was just we'd be in a minivan and you do.
We got to pull over.
It smells like one of those old cars that smells like sulfur.
Oh, so it's the farts are even worse.
What I mean, you wouldn't know what it was a burp is crazy.
It was and they were like long and hot and just like a gas leak.
He shit his pants on the tour bus.
It happens.
It was a big.
So it slows up your whole digestive system.
So like everything just move so slow.
Yeah.
And how much could you eat on that?
Would it like slow you down big time?
Me or yeah, you know, I could buy I would press through it.
I probably should have stayed on the Japanese.
Say you eat till you're 80% full.
Yeah.
If I was maybe doing that, I would have been all right.
But I would I would push through it because at the time it's Japanese.
His Japanese neighbor says that I got all of the Japanese.
It's called something in Japanese.
The Japanese neighbor.
But it wouldn't it wouldn't hit until later.
So I wouldn't realize how full I was to like a couple of minutes after I ate.
Yeah, they're going to be bad.
And it would just sit there.
You feel it in your stomach.
Just like having a crock pot down there.
Just slow cooking.
Set it and forget it.
Bad news is coming.
My girl fucking hated it.
Yeah, no shit.
Imagine having to sleep with that, dude.
That's crazy.
I'd get real defensive and better than my CPAP.
I'm like, what do you want me to do?
This is my weight loss journey went up to a machine.
Keeping you alive fighting with a mask on.
It's not my fault.
I'm just taking it off.
You burp into the machine at all, dude, that would wake me up in the middle of
the night and be like, what the fuck fucking hot boxing himself?
Wow.
I feel like punching out of an F-16, just like under the covers must have been
nuts.
The cover's must have been crazy.
The flavor.
Just seven passengers of a cruise die.
Yeah.
I remember one night she got up in the middle of the night and was like, I woke
up and she was standing at the end of the bed.
What are you doing?
What are you doing?
I'm getting healthy.
I'm doing this for you.
Oh, man.
I really wish I could have been a part of one of these burps.
I know I don't, but I just.
It smelled like it smelled like it's like sewage.
I think about the ozemic burps and going to a medicine ball every, all the time.
I think about this every day, the folio goes on a plane.
Oh, just I'd be so mad if I was on the plane.
Because sometimes when the noise of the plane and the air moving around, you
can get away with murder up there.
You really can't.
You really can't.
You let what you build it up and you got your own fan for.
Oh, yeah.
You can fucking hit the aisle.
You can hit the directional giveaways when you're moving the fan.
But yeah, you do that one little test to see if it smells and if it's all right.
Plus, you got the seat.
All that stuff, you know, could be a man.
Sometimes you're just like, fuck.
Yeah, wives.
I will say my wife punishes me when I fart on a plane.
She goes, it was at you.
And if I had for I'll laugh, I can't not laugh hysterically if I did fart and
someone smells it.
So I'll be like, dude, shut the fuck up.
Shut the fuck up.
Yeah, it's like, well, you're blowing up my spot.
Why would you do this?
I feel like it doesn't get that far, though, doesn't.
But when you see it hit someone, it's the.
Yeah.
You see, like, a guy reading the paper like.
Folds a Chris Wall Street journal dab.
Yeah, it is.
Me and Butterly were on a plane once and a little boy in front of us, any time
either of us farted,
he would turn around and go.
He would hit him and he would see his face in the gap at the seat.
He thought it was like the funniest thing in the world.
It was the funniest thing in the world.
Oh, so you would see his face.
That would have been me if I was a guy.
If somebody was behind me farting like that, I'd be like.
I'd have been delighted.
That was a real one.
Oh, fuck.
And he would like say it to his parents.
He'd be like, I think they farted again.
And they'd be like, shh, stop.
That was so funny.
Oh, fucking bastard.
Oh, so funny.
Yeah.
God damn, dude, man.
That was so funny.
Oh, fucking bastard.
That was so funny.
Yeah.
God damn, dude, man.