Name: Kippy Has A CRAZY Babysitting Story! | Are You Garbage
Uploaded: 2025-06-11T22:13:44.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Kippy Has A CRAZY Babysitting Story! | Are You Garbage' from Are You Garbage Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2025-06-11. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Kippy Has A CRAZY Babysitting Story! | Are You Garbage' from Are You Garbage Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2025-06-11. Transcript available.

this one's good too driving in reverse my dad spanked my brother on the bench
in the parking
lot of the beach no big deal we got home and the cops were waiting in our
driveway someone had
called to report him for child abuse my father said to the cop you know how it
is sometimes they
need discipline the cop said hey i get it people overreacted this kind of stuff
they shook hands
and the cop drove off fucking two early 2000s was a different time hey listen
it's like fucking
donnie briscoe my hands oh my hands are bruised talking to this spanking listen
i wasn't there
i don't know it was described as i don't get involved in this kind of stuff i
had a babysitter
spank me one time bare ass yeah it was a girl pay extra for that now yeah it
was so
strange i remember it was on the steps we were like three steps up on the steps
going upstairs to my
in my house in wilkes-barre she spanked me can't remember why fucking freak
that tight little ass
back then too soft uh-huh i had a a babysitter's boyfriend push me down the
stairs i'm with him
yeah fucking pussy
yeah i was young i was like five or six danny was running his mouth danny was
running his mouth
to the kid this is my brother my mom leaves probably going to work or whatever
i never told you this this whore's got some yeah she has a guy come over it was
like waiting whatever
guy she's currently sleeping with is over she has a guy like pull up like
minutes after my mom he must
have been down the block like laying in the seat waiting for the you know the
taurus to pull out or
whatever so she leaves he pulls up and danny's like you fuck is this all about
he starts running his mouth
whatever whatever so i got this cool we can start talking shit i start talking
shit i always got hit
for talking shit and danny's in his face and i'm in his face and i get fucking
pushed and this guy's
probably a teenager he's probably in his 20s i'm seven six seven danny's 12 or
something
danny knows he can't beat him up as a fucking grown man so we go over and get
my neighbor
what are you 200 what are you 200 at the time
deuce deuce and a quarter 215
i was on i was only hatkins at the time probably thought you were in college he's
got a baby face
i'm bald kid's built like a linebacker i'm bald he glasses on
yeah danny went and got my neighbor who was a badass dude he was a roofer went
and got your neighbor
yeah after he pushed you down the steps yeah well danny's like this guy just
threw up like danny's
if i'm seven danny's 11 this guy's 20 something could be 50 for all i know
fucking full-grown man and it's like clearly this guy's okay with hitting
children
so danny's like i'm gonna get my what steps the steps that your what your mom's
yeah which ones
the front steps wait a minute the ones inside yeah doesn't have a turn on it
yeah i fell i landed
on the landing probably we were off top point yeah that's like a full flight of
shit it's fucking
second floor i remember bouncing up being like whoa this guy don't play
this guy's like riffraff all over again he don't like to talk and shit he goes
right to action
all right i called you a jerk off that's my bad so we got off on the wrong foot
man you just you just crack your neck like all right you want to play dirty huh
he touched me he grabbed one of the poles rip it out fucking snap it over my
knee
prison rules huh tough guy i heard about you yeah yourself quite a bull here megan
you're not the
limp dick she had in here last week i take it ah my cousin pat and my and my
cousin joe when they
babysit they would bring broads over there and they were in high school man
they were like grown
women that this is me and my brother i heard this girl in a cheerleading outfit
came was she a stripper
showing up in a cheerlead it was like after school just wearing a coughlin
cheerleading outfit
fucking i'm in a i'm in a fucking 10 year old little chubster like me trying to
kick game
and you like ice cream i used to get a little nip of beer every once in a while
when the boys were
over sure night because we'd do the pouring they had the kegger my dad had a kegerator
he had a
fridge with a keg so we'd go pour the beers for the boys that ain't bad it was
all right learn how
to pour a nice beer side real nice crisp and cold probably jenny cream ale wait
what did uh
danny with his neighbor say to the neighbor yo this guy just fucking whatever
hey man get over
here this guy means business hey kevin's down that's his problem he should have
been running
his mouth little bitch like him i need a second to take this guy and i i think
my my the neighbor
was kind of like what the fuck are you dragging me into this is like a domestic
dispute you know
what do you mean not really you don't know this fucking guy he don't know i
mean domestic dispute
is when you know the person i know but he's going on just walking into a house
of this guy
like does he have a guy i don't know a knife a gun he's hitting children i
might listen i might
have slipped and blamed it on the guy too i don't know i don't fully remember i'd
hit my head
uh yeah i remember i remember opening my eyes being like whoa this is serious
business here
i remember being like what the fuck uh the guy come over the guy came over and
called i i this is
where i remember the guy the guy had like a really big truck right my neighbor
you know what i know and
he pulled up in the truck that's what i remember and i think at this point i
remember coming in the
driveway i remember i remember him vividly he had a backwards hat on fucking
dude was i'll tatted up
and uh i remember them talking i don't remember that's all i remember i
remember me looking out
the garage and seeing him i think he backed in too backed into the driveway
whoa i was like what the
fuck yeah big big like like did you ever see that babysitter again yeah he's a
family friend
did you ever see that dude again no i don't think we told my mom either
danny was probably going through her purse or something got caught you know
what i mean like
yeah or whatever the fuck he was doing pulling out her tampons he's probably
trying to sell this
probably trying to sell the guy weed and fucking sold him a beat bag or
something
don't be a bitch dude all right you get the a shirt but you want to go for a
quarter
i'm gonna land a chick like this you need at least a quap on you
we got we gotta wrap it
quap is such a good word
that's kind bud right there dude listen bubblegummer like you
it's a good starter pack don't smoke that shit and freak out and then start
calling me huh
hey listen we never met each other all right you were never here