Name: Bill Burr on Conan [Animated] Mocking the Military
Uploaded: 2022-04-21T14:34:39.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Bill Burr on Conan [Animated] Mocking the Military' from Bill Burr Animated on Comedy Buff. Published 2022-04-21. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Bill Burr on Conan [Animated] Mocking the Military' from Bill Burr Animated on Comedy Buff. Published 2022-04-21. Transcript available.

You did a show in Reno this weekend, I understand.
Yes, I did. Okay, how did it go?
It went great.
It was just, you know, a big show, everything went great.
And then one person, I was making fun of the military,
you know, which you can't do now.
Like we totally went from Vietnam,
all the hippies being like,
"Hey man, you're like a baby killer, man."
To like, now you got to give like a standing ovation
when they walk over to Delta, you know what I mean?
You know, show that you're not an ISIS.
Like, I don't know what you have to be doing.
You're like, "Ah, ah, thank you, thank you."
So I do this bit, making fun of the military a little bit.
And the first time I did it, I did it at a VFW
to make sure that it was funny in the right way.
And it killed.
It was even, dude, he lost his legs.
He almost fell out of his chair, dying laughing,
going, "Dude, that is so true."
So they were, you got approval from veterans.
So then I'm doing it in front of regular people,
you know what I mean?
So the second up, everybody has a good time with it,
except one person.
He came all the way up to the front and just starts,
didn't even heckle, just started yelling,
"Hey, show some respect!"
He starts yelling at me like he's my dad, right?
So he's like a hundred pounds overweight.
I'm like, why don't you show some respect
and lose a little weight.
Next time you have the middle seat on a flight,
you won't be spilling over onto your fellow Americans.
No, I know, I know, that's off limits,
'cause now fat people are heroes.
Everybody is a hero now.
Everyone's a hero.
No, I'm gonna tell you what about fat people.
Your organs are not giving you a standing ovation
as you walk over to the refrigerator again.
What you're doing is dangerous.
You got children, lay off the ice cream.
It's so brave.
It's so brave to be out of that, you know, so whatever.
So that guy, oh my God.
I was so upset that security like escorted him out.
I wanted to talk, like I started my show
blaming women for sexual harassment.
That's how I started it.
Yes, it was absurd.
I wasn't being serious, you children.
This is the worst time ever.
I have to now move my chair away from you.
I know, I know, 'cause then all of a sudden, I know.
Dude, it's literally.
It's tough times right now.
As a comedian, yeah, it's like the walls,
it's like you're in this walk-in closet
of what could be funny.
And meanwhile, there's like a swirl of trash
with every toothbrush he ever used
spinning around the Pacific Ocean.
Nobody cares.
God forbid you tease the Navy a little bit
and people have like a conniption.
Well, what did you say about the military
that got people so mad?
Or this one guy so mad?
I was just saying, like, yeah,
the guy who flies the fighter jet, okay?
And has missiles shot at him, that guy's a hero.
However, if you're the guy that like points
in the direction that the plane takes off in.
You know what I mean?
We're kind of, we're kind of watering down
what is heroic behavior.
You don't think that guy,
the guy who points in the direction is.
Yeah, the guy doing warrior one,
like the yoga pose.
Like the battlefield is that way.
No, but everything has just become that.
It's just become like this,
like, oh, this, you know,
that whole first responder thing, you know,
all these like code words you have to say.
It's so stupid.
I'm a first responder.
I love that one.
It's like, dude, I called you.
I saw the fire.
It's like, what am I, be up like ESP?
We just want to thank our first responders
and just everything has just become,
it drives me up the wall.
All right, we're going to take a little break.
We'll have more with Phil Burr.
We'll calm him down during the commercial break.
Take a look.