Name: Dave's Suits on LNwDL, June 11 and 12, 1985
Uploaded: 2016-06-09T02:57:10.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Dave's Suits on LNwDL, June 11 and 12, 1985' from Don Giller on Comedy Buff. Published 2016-06-09. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Dave's Suits on LNwDL, June 11 and 12, 1985' from Don Giller on Comedy Buff. Published 2016-06-09. Transcript available.

David Letterman!
Thank you. Thank you very much. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. And welcome to
the show, folks. Why is it, Paul? Now, I have a question. Let's just put the
cards down for one quick second. Don Johnson is on the broadcast tonight.
Yeah. Oh, now stop it. I want the names of everyone who went, whoo, and we're
going to come and get your lips. Now, okay. Now, Don Johnson is on the show. He
was telling me that people where he lives and works down there in Florida,
people come around the set dressed like Don Johnson. Okay. Now, he was also
telling me that last night he went to see Madonna in concert at Madison Square
Garden. Have you gone to see her, Paul?
Haven't caught her yet, no. Yeah. Now, are you going to go see her? I'd love to.
She's finished already, isn't she, though? I think she's on right now. Okay. So,
Don Johnson tells me that people go to see Madonna dressed up like Madonna.
Yeah.
Now, don't you think just once you folks could show up here dressed like me?
Only. I know. You don't like the way I dress. I don't like the way I dress. I
don't know how else to dress. This is it. Look at Paul. I could be like Paul,
couldn't I?
I can do that. I, uh, I must admit that I wore the white jacket in honor of Don
Johnson. But I wore, but Tom Selleck is still big, too.
All right. Now, I don't want to single anybody out, but as long as we're
talking about how people dress on this show.
Charlie, stand up. Come here. Just come here. Come here.
Charlie, nice to see you.
Charlie Drayton. He's, uh, substituting for Steve Jordan, who also has kind of
a look of his own.
And, and, uh, now I'm not making fun of you, Charlie, but what do you have
there? Those are pajamas, right?
It's a, it's like, you know, an all-day comfortable thing.
All day. All day.
And, and is it comfortable all day?
So I put my suit on at night.
Yeah. Uh, and it's made of, this is heavy cotton?
Flannel.
All right. Now, is it, are you the first one to be wearing one of these?
Uh, no.
Okay, go sit down.
He was, he was moist all over him. He was...
Do we, we don't even have time for these lousy jokes now, do we?
Let's just get to the business and, and, huh?
The phones are ready.
The phones are ready, and the business at hand, of course, as it is every night,
ladies and gentlemen,
entertaining America.
Yes.
This is not so much a show. How do we like to think of this, Paul? It's a
festival.
We like to think of it as a festival.
Let the festival begin.
I'm sorry. Are you all right?
It's a festival. I like to think of it as a family.
It is, it's a festival and a family, and, uh, it's two, two mints in one.
Well, uh, Charlie, now don't, are you not mad, are you, Charlie?
I'm not.
Okay, Charlie's having a good time.
And thanks for being here.
Is he going to be here two weeks or another week?
He's going to be here for the rest of this week.
All right.
He's going to be here for the rest of this week.
He's going to be here for the rest of this week.
He's going to be here for the rest of this week.
He's going to be here for the rest of this week.
He's going to be here for the rest of this week.
He's going to be here for the rest of this week.
He's going to be here for the rest of this week.
He's going to be here for the rest of this week.
He's going to be here for the rest of this week.
He's going to be here for the rest of this week.
He's going to be here for the rest of this week.
He's going to be here for the rest of this week.
He's going to be here for the rest of this week.
He's going to be here for the rest of this week.
He's going to be here for the rest of this week.
He's going to be here for the rest of this week.
He's going to be here for the rest of this week.
He's going to be here for the rest of this week.
He's going to be here for the rest of this week.
He's going to be here for the rest of this week.
He's going to be here for the rest of this week.
He's going to be here for the rest of this week.
He's going to be here for the rest of this week.
He's going to be here for the rest of this week.
Thank you very much.
All I want to do is grab a punk, toss him up against a squad car, and pat him
down.
You know what it is?
I just got tired of looking like the substitute host on the 700 Club every
night.
Okay, this, of course.
Now, do I look like Don Johnson or not?
Or do I look like Lyndon Johnson?
Okay, this, of course, is Don Johnson.
Take this off.
I am an Iraqi prisoner of war.
I don't know.
What do you think, Paul?
Hip look, babe, really.
But you know what I mean.
I just, every night, and then, but here I am, and so...
A lot of us have been feeling this way, and we're thrilled.
Well, why didn't you say something?
Well, because there's a tradition.
You know, you don't know how far to push the tradition.
The host, he's got to come out in a kind of a square jacket and a, you know,
rear tight.
All right, all right, all right, that's it.
Welcome to the show, ladies and gentlemen.
Should I do these?
Now, these jokes are a day old, because last night we didn't get to them.
Should we do them tonight?
All right, we'll do them tonight.
Malcolm Forbes today spent $1,760,000 for a Fabergé egg.
Also spent $500,000 for some Fabergé bacon.
Yeah, that kind of joke seems to go with the other outfit, doesn't it?
All right, here's one more.
White House officials are worried that the grave authorities found a couple of
days ago in Brazil
may actually be that of Joseph Mengele's.
They're worried that Reagan will want to go down there and lay a wreath on it.
Oh, thank you very much.
I may just be too damn hip for my own good.
Paul, bring the car around.
We're going to blow.
What else we got?
Any more of these?
Oh, and one more joke from, these jokes, of course, left over from the old
wardrobe, so.
Of course, the Los Angeles Lakers, bless their hearts, they won the world
championship in basketball,
and they went yesterday to visit President Reagan, and I thought this was nice.
They gave him a Lakers jersey with the number one on it, and Reagan, his name,
written on the back of the jersey,
which, of course, is just what the Lakers need in their backcourt.
A 73-year-old white guy.
Paul Schaefer.
A good family.