Name: Smothers Brothers on Letterman, August 28, 1992
Uploaded: 2016-06-12T17:51:13.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Smothers Brothers on Letterman, August 28, 1992' from Don Giller on Comedy Buff. Published 2016-06-12. Transcript available. Tom and Dick perform, then chat with Dave.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Smothers Brothers on Letterman, August 28, 1992' from Don Giller on Comedy Buff. Published 2016-06-12. Transcript available. Tom and Dick perform, then chat with Dave.

All right, let's bring out the Smothers Brothers.
We're in luck tonight because as a special request, as a special thanks to me
regarding a special request, they will be performing.
Oh, great.
Yeah, my special request was could you guys come out on the show and do a
little performing.
They're going to do a spot.
Exactly.
Our first guests started their careers as folk singers and have been performing
comedy together for 35 years.
On Saturday, they will be appearing live at the Valley Forge Music Fair.
Ladies and gentlemen, here they are, the Smothers Brothers boys.
Thank you.
Thank you very much, Bob.
We're going to sing for you, start off with one of the top ten all-time early
American songs.
You could call it a cowboy song, a folk song, whatever it is.
It's a very beautiful song.
It's simply entitled, The Cowboy's Lament.
Dressed in White Lament.
As I walked out in Laredo, one day, I spied a young cowboy, all dressed in
white linen, dressed in white linen, as cold as the clay.
I see by your outfit that you are a cowboy, I see by your outfit that you are a
cowboy, I see by our outfit you are a cowboy, too.
Oh, we see by our outfits that we are both cowboys, if you get an outfit you
can be a cowboy, too.
Here's one you'll like, Jimmy Gretcon and I don't care, Jimmy Gretcon and I don't
care, I don't care, I don't care.
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. That's not the way that song goes.
I don't care.
You what?
I said I don't care.
Why not?
I don't know.
You don't know.
But I don't know.
You don't know, you don't care.
I don't care.
Here's a good one.
I like that.
Oh, a hangman, hangman, hangman, slack your rope.
Hangman, hangman, slack your rope.
Slack it for a one.
How long should I let him hang there?
You look cute.
You're a little taller than me.
Okay, here's one you might not like.
Soap, soap, soap, soap, soap, soap.
Wait, wait, what are you trying to do?
Sing about eight bars.
Oh, no.
That was, you get, that's stupid.
That is, that is about the stupidest thing.
I let the others pass, but that is really stupid.
Now, why'd you sing that, Tom?
That's awful.
I had to sing it.
You didn't have to sing it.
I was forced to sing it.
Basically, I didn't want to sing it.
You were forced?
I didn't ask you to sing that.
Who asked you to sing it?
It's not important when it was.
But it is.
If you said you stuck it in the show and doesn't belong there,
it reflects on me and it reflects on you.
Now, why did you sing that song?
Paul Schaefer said it.
No.
Paul, why would he ask you to sing a dumb song like that?
I don't know.
He said, he wrote it.
He said, if I don't sing it, he said, you better sing it.
And so I said, okay, I'll sing it.
Why?
Did he threaten you?
He said, if I don't sing it, I'll never see another Letterman show again.
He's a musical director and he said, sing the song.
That's what he said.
So, so you did what he told you to do?
Paul Schaefer told me to sing it.
Do you do everything Paul Schaefer tells you to do?
Yep.
You do?
You do.
Would you jump off a bridge if Paul Schaefer told you to jump off a bridge?
Not again.
Okay, here we go.
Here's a song called, a contemporary song entitled, A Quick Sex Song.
I don't know this song.
You're not involved.
Doesn't matter.
This is called, a quick sex song.
Hope you enjoy it.
Ooh.
Ah.
That's it?
All right.
Now we know what kind of crowd we've got.
Let's, let's make this into a, a group sing-along.
This will be fun.
Not many sing-alongs on the Letterman show.
So we'll do this quick sex song as a sing-along.
It'll be a first.
And we'll have a lot.
Okay.
This one, we'll have, we'll break it up.
We'll have all the women do the ooh part, the first part.
And then all the men do the ah part.
And then we'll get this thing rolling along here.
And people be wandering outside.
What the hell is going on in there?
Okay.
Here we go.
All the women do the first part, the ooh part.
Here we go.
Ooh.
What are you doing?
A little foreplay here.
I think we're ready now.
Here we go, ladies.
All the first.
Here we go again.
Ooh.
Ah.
Second verse.
Ooh.
Ah.
I really got to hand it to you all.
I didn't think it would work.
But you were terrific.
They were wonderful the way they joined in.
Someone over there was faking it.
Oh, come on.
That's rude.
Don't pay attention.
I think you all did great.
Besides, it's hard to do it twice in a row that quickly, isn't it?
Thank you all.
Thank you.
Thank you.
That's it.
Thank you.
Come on, Vicki.
How'd you see you again?
Nice job.
Very funny.
Tommy, great job.
Good to have you back.
The Smothers Brothers, kids.
We're going to pause.
We'll be right back here.
How'd you go?
How do you do?
The Smothers Brothers, of course, are here.
Joe Cocker and James Marshall.
Thank you very much.
We all enjoyed that.
That was very nice of you to do it.
And it was very entertaining.
Thanks.
It was for us, too.
You know, I'm going to explain this to you.
How was it?
You enjoyed it?
Good.
Back to our roots.
And don't misunderstand what I'm trying to say here.
When I was younger, when I was a kid in high school, and I would buy all of
your record
albums and watch all of your television appearances, and I thought that there
was nobody funnier
or more entertaining than you guys.
And it stayed with me all these years.
So I'm very happy that you could be here with us.
Well, thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
I saw you were going to say that, and you've really grown out of that.
No, no, no.
It's nice to see you guys performing, still and always.
A lot of people think we've passed on.
Is that right?
It's great to be alive on your show.
How are things with you guys?
How are things with the family?
Now, is there another brother?
Did you have a...
Is there another...
No, we have two sisters, Sherry and Michelle.
And I was talking to Sherry.
My Sherry's a little younger.
They're both younger.
In fact, they're both younger than us.
But I was talking with Sherry, and we're going to Thanksgiving together with
all the family
and try to get together.
And my brother, Frank, was there when I called.
Oh, you have another brother, Frank.
Yeah, Frank.
Oh, I didn't know that.
But I was talking to my sister.
We don't have a brother, Frank.
We have a brother, Frank.
No, we have two sisters.
You had it right the first time.
I don't have two sisters.
We have a brother, Frank, but he was just...
We don't have a brother, Frank.
I mean, don't say...
He's not involved in this story anyway.
Oh.
Wait a minute.
It doesn't matter.
Well, of course he's not involved.
We don't have one.
Why'd you...
Why'd you...
Why'd you bring him up when we don't have one?
You never mention him.
Now, ask another question.
It's not my fault we don't have a brother.
Frank is just the other brother we have.
But you're asking about how things are, and there's some things...
Have you boys been stealing things out of the old Abbott and Costello trunk?
Is that what's happened here?
Laurel and Hardy's good.
I love that.
I love that.
Yeah, things are good.
I know you get the vineyard.
They're mostly good.
Yeah.
They're mostly good.
There's some bad...
We have...
The only bad thing that's happening right now is next...
This coming Tuesday, I go in for arthroscopic surgery on both my knees.
Oh, my gosh.
I'm sorry to hear that.
What did you do?
Well, this...
Athletic?
Sports?
No, it was on stage.
Stage injury doing...
So I was doing an impression of Johnny Carson at the same time doing the very
difficult
and exciting yo-yo trick, the man on the flying trapeze with the brain twister.
With the brain twister.
I did it on your show one time.
But then I tried to throw in the impression of Johnny Carson at the same time.
Both knees went up.
And your knees buckled.
Toward the cartilage.
Wow.
It's not...
No, it's serious.
And he's going to go to one of the top jock docs in L.A.
He's going to chop Tom.
And his knees are going to be...
He's a jock...
I'll be off.
I'll be off.
We can cancel some days, but I'm going to be fine, probably.
Well, good.
Good.
He's going to work on his mouth, too.
His tongue.
That may be a little much to hope for in your case.
You come out of it fine.
Well, if it had fixed my mouth, I wouldn't have a career.
Now, I think the last time you were on the show, you did a little Johnny Carson
for us.
And I wanted to ask you to do it again tonight, but if you're injured, you can't
do it.
Is that right?
Well, I can't do the full Johnny Carson thing.
But I can drop into him.
You can do a sitting, a working Johnny Carson.
I don't think...
Now, how does that injure your knees?
What kind of stress does this...
No, no, no, no.
You're going to hurt yourself.
I'll show you how it happened, though.
See, Carson, he does a lot of these...
Very straight posture.
Yeah, very straight posture.
And then I started...
One time I started doing...
Let's see, his feet are...
A full spin.
And I handed my foot.
Now, you're also going to need hip replacement surgery.
We continue that.
That's the way it happened.
So I get some good quality time off with my family in Virginia.
Good for you.
And you guys, where did we mention it?
You're going to be at Valley Forge in Pennsylvania?
And up at the...
Also, at the Dutchess County Fair Sunday.
And you're going to be at Westbury?
We just did that yesterday with Rita Redner.
Hey, and I've been working a year on a charity thing
we're doing in Virginia.
Fakir County and Loudoun Counties and Virginia Hospitals.
We're doing that September 18th.
So if anybody's in Virginia down there, come see us there.
Good for you.
And I want to thank you for the bottle of wine.
It's certainly a handsome vessel here.
Don't shake it.
Oh, I'm sorry.
That is a Cabernet Sauvignon.
We've had a winery.
Dickey opened a winery back in 1977.
Yeah, doing very well.
So we've got about...
Let me see.
We've got 14,000 acres of grapes.
And you make all of the wine from grapes
grown on the property?
On the property.
Really?
You don't have to buy them from other sources?
No, we're about 750,000 case winery now.
Do you guys drink?
No, no, no.
We have some better wine than you.
Why are you agreeing with me?
That's not the truth at all.
We only have 30 acres.
No, I don't...
But it doesn't matter anyway.
Say anything you want.
Now it's election year.
Last night, we had geniuses here.
We did.
Yeah.
Thanks again, guys.
Good to see you.
Thank you.
Tommy, good luck to you.
Thank you, sir.
Dickey, nice to see you.
Yes, sir.
The Smothers Brothers kids
will be right back.
We'll be right back.
We'll be right back.