Name: Irwin Corey on Letterman, December 6, 1983
Uploaded: 2017-02-08T01:17:48.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Irwin Corey on Letterman, December 6, 1983' from Don Giller on Comedy Buff. Published 2017-02-08. Transcript available. Corey's only appearance on the show.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Irwin Corey on Letterman, December 6, 1983' from Don Giller on Comedy Buff. Published 2017-02-08. Transcript available. Corey's only appearance on the show.

Thank you Paul. Hi there. Welcome back to the show. My next guest is a
versatile performer who
has appeared in, listen to this versatility, nightclubs, theaters, films, and
yes, even on
record. This is his latest album right here. I feel more like I do now. Please
welcome the
world's foremost authority, Professor Erwin Corey.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Do you mind if you give me a little assist, Professor? Come on over. Thanks for
seeing you.
Have a seat right there. There you go. Just turn around there. Okay.
This will work out just fine. Don't worry about a thing.
I feel that the only way that we can develop any continuity is to develop a
direction which
can make it possible for us to accept whatever our ideology might be. In that
course, we can
refer only to the origin of our birth. I was born in New York and being born in
New York
was being wonderful because, you know, on a clear day, you can see where you
live. Although
a lot of people don't realize that they don't realize that they want to make it
possible for
us to make it possible for us to accept whatever our ideology might be. In that
course, we can
refer only to the origin of our birth. I was born in New York and being born in
New York
was being wonderful because, you know, on a clear day, you could see where you
live. Although a lot of
people don't realize that they move to Peoria where it's quiet, there's no
trains, no buses. There's nothing.
There's nothing. There's just nothing. Excuse me. What was the question? I'm
sorry. There hasn't been a question yet.
That's one of the reasons that people are ill-informed. You've got to ask
questions, not from those who
seem to be in the place of authority because they are only there due to the
graciousness of the poor
people who vote and don't know what they're voting for. That's one of the main
reasons. You know, David,
you may not realize, but we've got Grenada and Grant Fenwick is next. We're
going to show
those people that this is the only way we can survive. We've got to be able to
do that. Otherwise,
we will contribute financially to the organizations that make it possible for
us to come to these areas.
I know, I know the fulfillment of our creation is based on the assumption. What
was that question?
Well, no, see, there's been no official question yet, but that's all right. Let
me ask.
That's one of the reasons people seem to have lost all direction. They don't
ask. You've got to ask
to find out when one says, "What the, what were you doing?" You don't realize
that you have
subjugated yourself. You've come very close to that twice now. Now, let me, uh...
Well, there was a dog that was following me all on. And I didn't even have any
shape. I had no shape.
I want to ask you about the record, Professor. I feel more like I do now,
Professor Irwin Corey. How's it doing? You selling a lot of these babies?
Oh, yes. I had four albums before this that were complete failures. I feel that
a failure is better to have in the beginning so that you can go from there
someplace else.
Because if you fail in the beginning, you can't go no further. So I did it four
times. And this is going to, you see, we only have four records left. We've
printed about 18.
And a friend of mine who works for a log company in New Orleans called the, you
know, it was the Pine Mountain Logs, which is really from Mount Sinai logs,
because they're very short.
The tall ones come from other areas. So you can tell which is the ethnic area
that represents the smaller log, because they're cut off in it.
I knew, I knew before I arrived here that the essence of my information is
calculated to reciprocate only in conjunction with the areas that seem to be arid
and desolate,
like Santa Fe. I was in Santa Fe. And it was very quiet. And we could see
Colorado.
You know, it looked the same like Texas, only it was blue. In Texas, the map is
green. And in Colorado, it's blue.
So I feel that even if you do come to any conclusion, it's based on the
assumption. Did you wash your hands as well? Oh, there he is.
I realized, David, that I must sometimes attribute my melou in the sense that
people don't know that Grant Fenwick was the place in the mouse that roared.
Yeah, that's right. And that's why it has such significance.
All right. Now, let's go back to the album, now that we've cleared that up.
What kind of stuff would be on the album there? What kind of material?
I don't think we ought to talk about that stuff that's in there because then
people will not be inquisitive. They'll say, "Oh, I heard it. Oh, it's falling
out."
So I feel that this album will be sometimes considered not in the realm of the
efficiency of which it has, but it has a feeling of bringing the country
together.
In this album, I found out that if we get rid of Montana and we get rid of
North Dakota, South Dakota, Nebraska, and Alaska, all these stations, I mean,
get rid of that territory and bring United States closer together.
We don't have to go too far to go where we want to be, and it will cost less
because then all airlines can go from one place to another without having to go
up and down like that.
It makes perfect sense to me. Now, do you have any upcoming film projects?
Oh, I have my film projects that I have come up and then go down. But I was in
a movie once that right after the title, the authors lost interest and the
thing went right down into the ground and we lost nothing.
Now, I've worked on other television stations and they only have one red light.
You must be a very affluent network. You've got three lights on one camera.
And two, I ain't working on the other. That's why NBC has to be careful in the
future with the amount of money they expend on things which are owned by the
public and therefore...
This is what is known as being on television.
Well, I tell you, I tell you, David, David, I truly am. I'm going to be in the
San Francisco area. I did do a movie with Donald Sutherland and Jack Warden,
Sean Penn, and a few other people that were in it.
What's the name of the movie? Crackers. It's named after a movie called Big
Deal on Madonna Street that was done in 1957 by a great Italian director who
lost his identity only after he submerged the actors who accepted the money
that they were getting.
When it was six o'clock, they had to all quit and go back on their jobs. So I
teach these people how to open up safes.
Now, my credentials...
Oh, as in safe crackers.
That's it. Safe crackers. I teach them how to open up safes. Now, I know a
million ways how to open a safe.
I tell you what. I tell them that. Let's save some of those ways for your next
appearance on the show.
Okay.
You mean this is it?
No, we have to go. We have other things to do here.
That's the trouble with this place. They have other things to do and they do
this.
Professor Irwin Correa, ladies and gentlemen.
Thank you.
Thank you.