Name: Stupid Human Tricks on Letterman September 4, 1984
Uploaded: 2017-04-19T16:14:47.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Stupid Human Tricks on Letterman September 4, 1984' from Don Giller on Comedy Buff. Published 2017-04-19. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Stupid Human Tricks on Letterman September 4, 1984' from Don Giller on Comedy Buff. Published 2017-04-19. Transcript available.

okay anyway we're happy to be back in the lovely city of new orleans louisiana
let's uh let's get
right to our thing here this is something we call stupid human tricks what you're
about to see these
are folks who have taught themselves silly little but interesting things to do
now let me remind you
this is only an exhibition this is not a competition please no wagering our
first participant
tonight mr sam gash sam come on out here hi sam how are you how you doing nice
to see you
sam where are you from i'm from texas but i'm a new yorker now i see what do
you do for a living
well i was interning this summer with nbc and cbs offered me a job oh and what
do you do for cbs
well i'm working in the political department and by the way i want to thank marlene
altman for
letting me off my first day to do this well this is your first day on the job
yes when they see this
they'll be mighty impressed with you no doubt about it i'll be there with crunkite
and rather what what
do you do in the political whatever you said you did there uh i really don't
know yet well this is
your first day sure yes all right now what are you what are you going to do for
us tonight sam
well well first i've got to say hi to now wait a minute wait a minute you set
hi already to two
that's it but no no no no drop him a card president jimmy carter is staying in
my dorm on the same
floor with me in my dorm room here in new york and i just want to say hi to him
he's in new york this
week and uh he's staying with me at metro benster's curse so i've got to say
that he's a nice guy
how many of you are sharing a room with a former president
all right i didn't realize there's that many people
uh do you have a trick sam or is this just a community billboard tonight
no okay i'm i've got a trick okay what is the trick i take off my vest without
taking off my jacket
all right is there uh now how did you learn how to do this or did the president
teach you this
well you know he and rosalyn came in no and me and a few guys were just uh
messing around one day and uh
all of a sudden you figured it out yes okay do you need anything do you need a
drum roll a timing
lights if you just see uh if you just say ready set go all right i can do that
okay wait i need to
unbutton my vest it's impossible to do it buttoned all right okay yeah you
tried once and hurt yourself
many times we're out out for a couple of weeks with a all right a sprained vest
okay are you
you ready sam yes now what do you what did you decide about the drum roll
because we have a man
here who can do it okay let's go all right ready set go
this is the tough part dave
very impressive piece of work sam we're going to take a look here
very impressive piece of work sam we're going to take a look here slow motion
i don't care what you say cbs got a bargain here in this guy
good luck to you sam thanks for being here nice talking with you
could he possibly be sharing a room with the president
uh our next participant uh tonight jeannie yetman jeannie
hi jeannie how are you nice to see you
jeannie where are you from
maryland maryland what do you do for a living i'm a graphic artist uh and i'm a
student at maryland
i see and uh what what have you taught yourself to do tonight
i roll a quarter down my nose bounce it off the table into a glass
roll a quarter down your nose it hits the table and into into the glass right
now how did you learn
how to do this at the voo i'm sorry at the voo it's a bar in maryland oh it's a
bar
and i was going to say i'll bet that's a bar right and how long did it take you
to learn this
uh not long friend of mine taught me friend of yours taught you okay is there
anything special
that i can do for you do you need any harnesses winches pulleys okay how about
it would you like
a drum roll um all right okay all right you don't have to have one if you don't
want one do you want
one or not all right do they have one at the voo or not not usually they have
people crowded around
oh we can get some people crowded around you guys want to crowd around
we'll get the bandit okay okay
i'm sharing a room with um president ford for sharing a room with former
president ford ladies
and gentlemen all right all right genie now do you need a drum roll you can't
have one because
he's right here okay just on the bar genie yetman rolling a quarter
very close
nice job very nice let's take a look here at genie
down the nose yeah genie nice meeting you good luck thank you very much for
being here genie yetman
ladies and gentlemen all right well see at the voo the door would be over there
okay uh-oh uh-oh our next participant dr mary jenkins ladies and gentlemen
hi mary how are you
mary where are you from i'm originally from lincoln nebraska and now i'm a new
yorker
okay and the doctor what sort of doctor are you my family practitioner i work
out in the bronx
very good
and what is the nature of what you are going to do tonight i'm going to play my
hand
oh well uh all right uh mary uh how did you learn how to do this
i think my brother learned it uh in california and then he he came back to nebraska
and taught
myself and my younger brother and we play trios at christmas time i bet that's
something to see
now are you are you worried about jeopardizing your practice by doing this on
television
i haven't thought about that all right what can we do for you you need a crowd
or a drum roll
i'll just i'll take the crowd i'll just sit on the stool okay all right there
you go dr mary jenkins
ladies and gentlemen oh you're gonna actually play is that it you're right she's
going to play yankee
doodle on her hands i usually i usually uh tune up first all right
we're gonna take a look at it there she is instant reply by the way i i think
you're finished in
medicine doctor thank you very much good luck to you nice meeting you i
appreciate that
okay we're uh yeah we have to do a commercial we're out of time we have another
great one we'll
have to save for another night maybe if we have time tonight we'll get to it
right
maybe but don't don't hold your breath uh we'll be right back to meet herb
doctor