Name: Viewer Mail on Letterman April 10, 1992
Uploaded: 2017-12-10T01:10:16.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Viewer Mail on Letterman April 10, 1992' from Don Giller on Comedy Buff. Published 2017-12-10. Transcript available. By request of the son of Letter #2.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Viewer Mail on Letterman April 10, 1992' from Don Giller on Comedy Buff. Published 2017-12-10. Transcript available. By request of the son of Letter #2.

It's Friday night, ladies and gentlemen. That means one thing. We answer our
viewer mail. Yes? Yes.
Actual letters from actual viewers.
Let me have a little beverage here, then we'll begin our viewer mail. Here we
go. A little beverage.
Letter number one, dear Dave, what the hell are you looking at? Paranoid, Ronalyn
Riley and Heather Kosterman, Pennsylvania.
It's interesting. Took two people to write this letter.
Dear Dave, what the hell are you looking at? Hey, hey, hey, what am I looking
at? What the hell is everybody looking at?
I'll tell you what. Everybody's looking at barn owls eating mice to the music
of Annie.
You're always a day.
Barn owls eating mice.
Plus a hundred beautiful ladies, ladies and gentlemen.
A hundred right here on stage, naked.
Everybody tonight naked on stage.
A hundred beautiful ladies.
Dear Dave, on your February 19th show, you toured some of the empty space in
the GE building.
And good Lord, are those rooms barren?
If you can arrange for my band and myself to practice in one of those vacant
rooms, we'll play a lot of loud rock and roll music and annoy the hell out of
the neighbors.
Well, we actually take care of that.
It's your friend D.
Talata, Taleda, Taleda, Rochester, New York.
I know what he's talking about.
A couple of weeks ago, we took some cameras down the hall and we showed people
where the renovations were going on and everything was empty.
And it was huge.
This giant, vast open expanse.
That was all part of the fix-up here at the building.
It's all over now.
And they did a great job with that renovation.
And let me show you what's in there now.
Hal, roll that videotape of the new wing of the building.
Here, take a look at this.
This is where that big empty space used to be.
It's the General Electric Museum of Firings and Layoffs.
Look, they put it in there.
You got your pink slips.
You got the symbolic axe.
You got the whip.
And you have a suit there and the pictures of all of the men and women who have
been fired and doing a pretty brisk business.
No idea.
They gasped.
Then there was silence.
Then smattering of applause.
And there was a nice round of applause.
Dear Dave, when are you and Paul going to go out on your tour like Regis and
Kathie Lee?
Chuck Hogan from Boston, Massachusetts.
You know, that's funny you should mention that.
We did.
We just finished up a big tour.
I'm sorry if you didn't get a chance to come and see me and Paul live on the
big tour.
Maybe another year.
You know, I have a poster.
Yeah, this was it right here.
Let's see.
This was the big winter tour of 92, our big 50-city tour.
Here, there it is.
That's the tour that Paul and I were on.
Hey, there's your high-quality item, huh?
Letter number four.
Pardon me.
Yeah, excuse me.
Letter number four.
Dear Dave, how do you do it?
Just wondering.
Mike Homer, Glassboro, New Jersey.
Well, Mike, I don't want to give away all my secrets, but I will say this much.
It takes plenty of fertilizer.
Watch.
Take a look at the results you get.
Here.
Here's what I mean when I say it takes plenty of fertilizer.
Look at that.
That's a beauty, isn't it?
Good.
Plenty of fertilizer.
Hi.
Good evening, Mr. Levin.
Hi, who are you?
I'm Blaine Prentiss from the University of Georgia.
Hi, Blaine.
Nice to see you.
Thank you.
Pardon the interruption, but I wish to present you and your fine program with
the George Foster
Peabody Award for Outstanding Achievement in the Arts and Science of Broadcasting.
Oh, my God.
Thank you.
Thank you very much.
Blaine, was it?
Yes.
Wow.
That's something.
What's that?
This is a giant gag tomato.
We're using it.
We're doing a little skit here on the show tonight.
Yeah.
We do a lot of little stuff like this all the time on the show.
You know what we did earlier?
We had some footage of barn owls eating mice, and then we played Annie from the
Broadway musical.
Hey, how roll that for, Blaine?
Did you see that?
Yeah, watch this.
There.
Look at that.
There's the barn owls eating the mice.
And then we played Annie.
How about that, huh?
You know, when I first heard you won this award, I thought it was a mix-up.
Uh-huh.
But now, I understand.
Uh-huh.
God bless you, Dave.
Well, thank you very much.
And God bless the Peabody selection committee.
Oh, thank you.
And good luck to you.
Thank you.
I hope you can get a cab.
Thank you.
Thank you.
I hope you can get a cab.
Oh, boy.
Oh, man.
You betcha.
This ain't one of them two-hour primetime specials, is it?
What are you saying?
Oh, nothing.
Let's pause now for a commercial.
When we come back, our friend Howard Stearns will be here.