Name: Viewer Mail on Letterman, April 30, 1982
Uploaded: 2018-07-28T03:08:12.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Viewer Mail on Letterman, April 30, 1982' from Don Giller on Comedy Buff. Published 2018-07-28. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Viewer Mail on Letterman, April 30, 1982' from Don Giller on Comedy Buff. Published 2018-07-28. Transcript available.

You'll see how that goes a little bit later presently right now if you will say
hello to mr. Paul Schaeffer and the world's most dangerous band
Without exaggeration the weirdest one tonight. It's gonna be weird. It is. It's
exciting. It's our first 90 minute
I guess the word extravaganza has never more been more suitable than it is
tonight. I
Got one of those coats on I can't sit down until I do this. Thank you very much
If you've ever seen this television program before you're aware of the fact
that once a week we like to take actual viewer mail and share it with our
Actual viewers so we're going to do a little bit of that right now once again
mail
We have actually received written by actual viewers. Here we go
Viewer mail number one comes to us from Maggie
Sokolik I'm just guessing at that name Sokolik from Santa Monica, California
one of the most beautiful places on the earth
Maggie asks, how come when you call people on the telephone they are always
home?
Let's call Maggie and see if she's home, Charlie
First the area code is two one three. This is just down the street from my old
home
And let's see if Maggie is home. Oh, what time would it be now in California?
Three hours earlier there would be about three hours earlier. Yeah, two to
thirty about two thirty
We're calling ring number one the jackpot is six hundred dollars the count is
four from the top
Ring number two
Maggie's one chance to find out why the people we talked to on the phone are
always home
Ring number three for Maggie
What do you think two more and she's a ghost?
And coming up on our final ring that means we put another hundred and fifty in
the jackpot
That's it for Maggie. We'll never know why the folks we call are always at home
Letter number two comes to us from David gears. David writes
We don't have a return address for David. It's not required. I think it would
be a great asset if you could have Julia
Parentheses child parentheses. I guess that means Julia child as opposed to a
son or daughter of Julia
Appear on the show and give us some tips. This is a good letter. Give us some
tips on midnight snack ideas
Popcorn is fine, but a little chocolate mousse couldn't hurt boy. It certainly
couldn't hurt
Well, we couldn't contact Julia child on short notice
We did however get a hold of the head of the NBC executive dining room
His name is Joe grippy Joe. Thank you for being here
And you have actually cooked for grant tinker and many of the nbc stars and you
are here tonight to show us how to prepare
soup from a can
Okay, don't take it away very simple open the can
Pour in the pot
Grab the spoon
Grab the spoon
Start staring it
It's nice and warm
It's delicious
And it's good for you
Just keep reminding yourself. This is network television ladies and gentlemen.
Thank you very much. Joe. I appreciate that soup from a can
Letter number three comes to us from oh, there's one of these people with one
name here. This is show ban or stobar
uh says I love you and edward newman edwin newman nbc newsman you should become
a team
That's interesting ed newman and me a team that's boy. I don't you know wonder
what that would
Now the yuck yucks comedy showcase is bound to present the comedy team of newman
You have a great baseball team here at nbc. Oh, yes, we do
Why don't you tell me the names of the players all right? We have who's on
first?
What's on second and I don't know on third. What did you say?
We have who's on first
What's on second? I don't know on third
David what you're saying is not grammatical you wouldn't say what's on second
baseball player is a person not an object
And I don't knows on third makes no sense
What you meant to ask me is who's on first who's on second who's on third
Yeah, I wasn't asking I was telling you telling me what who's on first what's
on second
I don't know is on third that's just plain wrong
Why you it's just a gag. I'm reading off the players
It must have dozed off there well, uh our I believe this may be our final
letter john redshaw from ice slipped new york writes
Hey, what happened to plan nine from outer space?
I have been waiting with bated breath for weeks for the next action-packed
installment of this masterpiece of bad motion picture making
Please return us to this incredible film I agree completely john it's about
time once again
It's time to put your feet up on the dog and relax with a cup of your favorite
bedtime beverage as we present
Nightcap theater
A feature especially designed for that segment of the audience that can only
watch one minute of an old movie at a time
And now installment number four of our science fiction classic plan nine from
outer space
Unbelievable isn't it you could cut the electricity in here with a knife be
with us again next time when flying saucers land vampires rise
And it's another typical day in the san fernando valley on
Nightcap theater oh heavens we're going to pause now we'll be right back with
stupid petricks
But first intermission
Ladies and gentlemen our next attraction
There are candy bars of lore in a lobby candy store just in case you want a
taste of something sweet
Our popcorn is nutritious you will find it delicious
Most anything that you would care to eat
Cooling drinks that are so grand simply name your favorite friend
Or some ice cream so good and helpful too
If you feel you need nutrition now's the time it's intermission step right up
we have the very bed for you