Name: Promoting the 1st Top Ten Book on Letterman & Live at Five, October 9, 1990
Uploaded: 2018-11-09T04:46:48.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Promoting the 1st Top Ten Book on Letterman & Live at Five, October 9, 1990' from Don Giller on Comedy Buff. Published 2018-11-09. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Promoting the 1st Top Ten Book on Letterman & Live at Five, October 9, 1990' from Don Giller on Comedy Buff. Published 2018-11-09. Transcript available.

Thank you very much.
Thank you.
Dave, is everything alright? I see you conferring with the cameraman.
I was over there chatting with Bailey.
You were?
I just went over to say hello.
That's nice. It's nice to develop a relationship with your crew.
How you doing?
I'm fine. You know, speaking of crew, I think this is really more than a crew.
More like family.
It's a family. Don't you think it is?
Yeah, yeah.
It's a love kind of family.
You know, speaking of families, I've been watching the Today Show.
I watched the Today Show here on NBC, the morning show.
Jane Pauley is gone, as you know.
Bryant Gumbel is there.
Tippi Hedren took over.
No, what's her name?
Tippi Hedren took over?
Whenever I can't think of a name, I just say Tippi Hedren.
What's her name?
Tippi Hedren.
Huh? What's her name, huh?
Faye.
Barbara who?
Deborah Norville.
Deborah Norville.
Deborah Norville, Bryant Gumbel, Joe Garagiola,
He's not right.
And then your regular cast, you have Ed McMahon and I don't know.
John.
And Tippi Hedren, I don't know.
Yeah.
So what were you thinking?
Gene Shalop and those things.
Yeah.
What were you thinking?
Here on NBC.
Now over on ABC, they have the Good Morning America.
They have that over there.
Yeah.
Now you know, I don't know if you are aware of this.
When Jane Pauley left to go off and pursue her singing career, Good Morning
America, their
audience like doubled overnight.
Virtually doubled or tripled overnight.
I understand that is true, yes.
So, all of us in the industry were interested by this and so we kind of kept a
close eye
on the Good Morning America.
And now over the last six, seven months, they've continued to maintain this
vast morning viewing
audience.
So periodically, I'll check in to see what they're doing.
All right.
Now this morning, they had a closing of the show at 8:55.
They have a big number with Peter Allen.
Really?
Yeah.
One of those, "Rio.
We're going to Rio.
Hey, we're going to Rio.
Yeah."
They do, yeah, they do one of those.
And they have like a full band and I'm thinking, "Jeez, is this Good Morning
America?"
Yes, it is Good Morning America.
And it finishes up and when Peter Allen finishes up with his Rio stuff, you
hear Charlie Gibson,
the host of the show, he says this, "Woo!"
Now.
Then you hear Joan London, the other host of the show, she says this, "Woo!"
I was stunned by that.
I couldn't think of anything else the rest of the day.
But there's Peter Allen, "Hey, it's going to Rio."
Yeah.
And then Charlie Gibson, America's most trusted morning show host and his co-host.
Anchor.
And all they can say is, "Woo!"
That's crazy.
I don't blame you.
It's not what you expect to hear first thing in the morning.
No.
Well, first of all, you don't expect to see Peter Allen at five minutes and
nine in the morning.
No, doing that.
You know, with the big sleeves and the things.
Doing that stuff.
You know.
Well, I guess that's how you get ratings at early in the morning.
Hey, you know, let's call over there.
We got a...
Did you know anything about this book, by the way?
Oh, the book that...
Yeah, there's a big late night book out.
Oh, the late night...
Now, let's call our friend Meg across the hall there at Simon & Schuster.
That's the top ten.
Hal, Hal, turn on the external camera, will ya?
Alright, that's our director.
There, open the blinds.
There we go.
There's Meg over there.
Alright, now let's call Meg.
We've known Meg for...
Geez, has it been a year, Paul, do you think?
Yeah, she works in the Pocket Books division of Simon & Schuster Publishing.
And her window is...
We'll see if she knows any...
Huh?
Her window is right across from our...
Yeah, there she is.
She has beautiful auburn hair.
Look at that.
She's a lovely woman.
We've grown to know her.
We've grown to love her.
And the phone should be ringing any minute now.
Hey, we're going to...
What?
Yes, we're going to Rio.
Hey, hey, it's all...
Meg, it's me, Dave.
Hey, how are ya?
Wave to America there.
Meg, what are those flowers you have there?
Flowers.
Oh, did we hear Meg?
What?
I was supposed to ask if we can put her voice on the air.
Oh.
I'm sorry, Meg.
Sure.
Can we put your voice on the air?
Yes.
Okay.
What are those flowers there, Meg?
Uh, they're just decorative.
I think they're called status.
Yeah, status.
Now, let me see that lady.
It looks like you have a little suit on, a little dress.
What is that?
It's a dress.
Yeah, that's very nice.
Could you stand up?
Is that new?
Very, very nice, Meg.
Thank you.
Yeah.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
And Meg, I'd just like to add, "Woo!"
Now...
Whoa!
Uh, Meg?
Hello?
Hello?
Oh, now what happened here?
Did I disconnect her?
Oh, I disconnected.
Oh, man.
All right, Paul.
Dialing music, Paul.
We have to call Meg back.
It's dialing music time.
How could I have disconnected poor Meg?
Now she probably hates me.
Yeah.
That ought to be some kind of law.
You don't need Peter Allen on television before noon.
Now she's gone!
Oh, no!
Meg is gone.
We're screwed.
Hi.
Oh, hi, Meg.
It's me.
Okay.
What the hell's going on over there?
I don't know.
I might ask you that same thing.
Oh, well...
You were...
It was only, Meg, we were just disconnected.
I'm sorry.
Well, I'm sorry, too.
You gave me a heart attack there.
You vanished.
Now, anyway, so Meg, how have you been?
I've been fine.
Have you missed me?
Well, sure.
Yeah.
What'd you do this weekend?
I went to my 10th year high school reunion.
Wow, you went to high school?
Yeah.
It's a joke, Meg.
I'm just joking with you.
And how was that?
It was better than I had thought.
Where did that take place?
In some loft kind of space down in Soho.
Uh-huh.
And had people recognized you from the show?
Had they seen you from being on TV at all?
A few, not too many.
Yeah.
All right, now, Meg.
Yes?
Uh, you know, we have this book here.
We have the big late night top 10 book.
Now, is that published by your company?
Yes, it is.
Yeah, is it Simon & Schuster or is it pocketbooks?
No, it's pocketbooks.
Now, you know, they gave us like a huge advance for this.
Well, yeah.
Yeah, like a million dollars or something.
Oh, at least.
Yeah, yeah.
Now, is the thing out?
Is it selling now?
Is it on the streets?
Well, it should be, yes.
Yeah, and is it doing well?
Are people upset about it or are they pleased about it?
I think they're pretty pleased.
They're pleased so far.
All right.
Have you got a copy there?
Um, I can get one.
Yeah, yeah.
Quick, can you get one for us?
Get me a copy.
Oh, I love the way she pushes people around over there.
She just snaps her fingers and people race around.
Hey, you ever watch Good Morning America?
I have watched it in the past.
Did you see it this morning?
No.
Peter Allen was on.
Did you watch?
Oh, of course.
Oh.
Being a big Peter Allen fan.
Yeah.
I have the scrapbook I like to update as often as I can.
All right, Meg, now do me a favor.
Yes.
Hold the big book up here close to the window so we can see what it looks like.
Okay.
All right, now there's my goofy looking face.
Now, Meg, you see those blue things, those blue little rectangles?
Those little decorative.
Do you know what those are?
Um, they're decorative flourishes.
Yeah, but you know, they're supposed to be like these blue cards here.
Oh.
See, the ones I'm holding there, they're supposed to be those as if we were
throwing those in the air.
Oh, I didn't know that.
Yeah, yeah.
Have you read the book?
Well, I've looked through it, yes.
Yeah, but the question, of course, Meg, was have you read the book?
You mean cover to cover?
Yes, cover to cover.
I understand it's quite a page turner.
It is, but you know, it's the kind of book I think you kind of pick up and leaf
through.
Yeah, Meg, how's that Tara? Was that her name?
Yeah, that was her name.
Yeah, she still worked there?
She does.
I think she's fine.
Yeah, well, give her my best.
I will.
She's a lovely woman, isn't she?
She seems very nice.
Yeah.
I don't know her that well.
Oh, you don't know her that well?
No.
How old a woman is she?
In her 20s.
In her 20s.
All right.
Okay, Meg, that's perhaps for another time.
Now, can you do me a favor and page through that and just find a little list
there and you'll
read a top 10 list for us tonight.
Do you mind doing that?
No, I don't mind at all.
Okay.
By the way, I'm sorry about that disconnect.
It really wasn't my fault.
Well, I'm sorry if it was my fault.
No, it wasn't your fault.
You just, though, you sounded kind of huffy.
Well, I really wasn't.
All right.
Okay.
Just leaf right through there.
Find an extra funny one because we'd like to get out from under this advance,
you know.
Okay.
Let's see.
Um, Campbell's top 10 least favorite, least popular soup.
Okay.
Ladies and gentlemen, tonight's top 10 category is Campbell's top 10 least
favorite soups.
Are you ready, Meg?
Yes, I'm ready.
Okay, here we go.
Yeah.
Okay.
Number 10, cream of gristle.
Cream of gristle.
Number nine, tomato garagiola.
Tomato garagiola.
All right.
Number eight, old-fashioned grease and weasel.
Old-fashioned grease and weasel.
Okay, continue, please.
Number seven, mink bisque.
Number seven is mink bisque.
And number six is turkey with platformate.
Turkey with platformate.
All right.
Number five, tap water and lawn trimmings.
Number five is tap water and lawn trimmings.
Number four, uh, Turkish prison surprise.
Uh-huh.
All right.
We all like that one.
Okay.
That's a good one.
Number three, Bryant gumbo.
Number three is Bryant gumbo.
Okay.
Number two is sideburns and barley.
What was, that was number two is what?
Sideburns and barley.
Sideburns and barley.
Okay.
Number one least popular Campbell's soup is?
Manhattan style Windex and shrimp.
Windex and shrimp.
Thank you very much Meg.
Okay.
Goodbye.
Okay.
All right.
Are we all set?
Hey, we got a great show.
Blair Brown is here.
Boy, that Meg is sweet, isn't she?
She is the greatest.
A nice, solid woman.
Okay.
All right.
All right.
Are we all set?
Hey, we got a great show.
Blair Brown is here.
Boy, that Meg is sweet, isn't she?
She is the greatest.
A nice, solid woman.
She is the greatest.
How old a woman do you think she is?
I don't know.
We established her.
I think she's like 26 or 27.
In her 20s.
Yeah.
The Black Crows and T.C. Boyle.
Author T.C. Boyle.
Author of East is East.
We'll be out here in a minute.
What else?
Am I forgetting anything?
All right.
We'll do a commercial and then, you know, come on back.
All right.
We'll do a commercial and then, you know, come on back.
Wow, wow, thank you, thank you, wow, thank you.
Did you see the big country western, oh, by the way, Hal, turn on the Live at
Five program, see what's going on over there.
These are the people across the hall every afternoon.
Walk around as opposed to standing still.
Oh, no, no, Hal, Live at Five, nothing from your little home video collection.
Now, we have writers, our own writers are appearing on the show.
Have they been on already?
Huh, they what?
Not yet.
Will they be on?
All right, thank you.
Will you let me know the second they're on, Hal?
Yes.
Okay.
So, the country western hall of fame all-time all-star music awards for country
western people.
Did you see that last night?
I saw a little of it, yeah.
Yeah, what do you think of that show?
I thought it was a terrific show.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
A lot of good music.
How did you feel about it?
I enjoy it.
I enjoy it.
As you know, one of my lifelong show business goals and dreams is to date the
Judds.
I don't blame you.
Both of them at once.
Are we ready or are they on yet?
Okay, they're across the hall.
Plug in the sorry book.
Plug in the top ten book.
Although the audience seemed to enjoy Meg's...
Meg's version of the top ten was very nice.
All right, so I'll bring out our first guest.
If anything transpires over there at Live at Five, we'll punch it right up, all
right?
Okay.
Okay, here we go.
Welcome back to the program, kids.
Blair Brown is with us and the Black Crows and T.C. Boyle.
And are they on yet, Hal?
They're on right now.
All right, let's eavesdrop.
Don't tell them we're going to listen.
These are writers across the hall plugging our book.
Do you mind here?
Let's take a look here a second.
All right, let's just...
That's Al Roker pretending to be interested, pretending he read the book like
he ever read.
Steve O'Donnell is our head writer.
Other magazines and other shows put on top ten lists, you know, most eligible bachelors.
God forbid they would say something nice about me.
You know, top ten, you know, best vacation.
Is Mulligan there as well, Hal?
Well, tell him to widen out so we can see Mulligan.
Wipe that shot out, please.
We can do that.
So we did it.
Wipe that shot.
Oh, no, that's a...
Maybe Mulligan was taken ill at the last minute.
Swinging your own mouth suit.
Al just wants to get out of here and go to dinner.
Oh, there he is.
There's Mulligan.
We did like a couple of guys looking for day work.
All right.
How many people?
All right, that's enough, Hal.
Thank you very much.
Thank you.
We always want to know more about David Letterman, don't we?
Al Roker's now got a couple of guests over there who could tell us the real
dirt.
We don't know if they're going to.
I don't think they will because Dave's their meal ticket.
You guys aren't doing it.
I have a mortgage.
We want to welcome two of the main writers from Late Night with David Letterman,
Mr. Steve O'Donnell, Jerry Mulligan.
Thanks for...
Do you prefer Gerard or Jerry?
I prefer either one.
Okay.
And you've got a book out which is called The Late Night with David Letterman,
book of top ten lists written by David Letterman and The Late Night with David
Letterman writers.
So this is basically a whole bunch of the top ten lists that you guys did.
Yeah, it would be as if, Al, you put a book together of the best weather
forecasts you've given over the past two years.
Small book.
Yeah, a little different.
But then again, this is kind of a thin book, too.
Now, you guys are getting $8.95 for this thing.
$11.95 in Canada.
Yes.
It does include a free meal and overnight pass to Dave's house.
So that's a pretty good deal.
Now, really, where did the idea come up from then?
Why did you guys decide the book?
Well, we're always looking for things to kill time.
And several years ago, we thought, well, other magazines and other shows put
out top ten lists,
you know, most eligible bachelors and, you know, best summertime desserts or,
you know, top ten, you know, best vacation destinations.
And we said, well, they have no credentials to put out, you know, best and
worst dress lists.
So we said, we can do that, we can do that, so we did it, and we've kept at it
since then.
Let's see, you've got the top ten things that will get you kicked out of Disney
World.
Number one is bringing your own mouse suit.
Number ten, driving down Main Street, USA with Bambi's mother strapped to your
fender.
Yeah, I'm sorry.
I'm sorry, Sue.
How many people, I mean, how much of that do you get when you start throwing
out lists when you're writing and you get groans from the other writers?
Well, we feel glad if we get any kind of reaction at all, Al.
Seriously, watch the show, you know how grateful we are.
As soon as we get a reaction, we'll get in touch with you.
People, seriously, people tend not to react to the, they don't get angry when
we say nasty things about people dear to them.
For some reason, in this format, I don't know.
We've had a couple of people who like the lists well enough to write in for
them.
Ralph Nader wanted a copy of, we did Top Ten Ways American Cars Would Be
Different If Ralph Nader Had Never Been Born.
And there were things like, you know, an in-dashboard hibachi and stuff like
that.
He was tickled enough by that to ask for one.
Top Ten Least Popular Candy Bars, Lug Nut, Good and Linty, Reverend Al's Marshmallow
Medallion.
Yes, and I think there's also Roger Ebert's Mystery Law.
Yes!
We're in litigation about that right now, so.
Now, has anybody been a little upset at any of the Top Ten Lists?
Have you heard anything?
We haven't been serious.
Maybe, I know Joan Collins over perfume comments.
When she came out with her perfume, I think she may have been a little bit peeved,
but, oh, she's much too classy a lady to ever let her any kind of comment.
Okay, well, we've got, uh, you guys wrote up a list of, uh, for Live at Five, a
Top Ten list?
Did we? Custom made.
Ooh.
It's as fresh as an AstroTurf outfit.
Why don't you guys go ahead with the, ladies and gentlemen, the Top Ten, what
is this Top Ten list?
Top Ten differences between Live at Five and Late Night.
Ah, from the home office?
That's right.
And if you could do something like a drum roll.
Do we have a drum roll by any chance?
No, we'll just go right ahead.
Okay, number ten.
Sue Simmons takes cues from her stage manager, whereas Dave, from Voices in His
Hand.
Live at Five sponsors.
Volvo, Bank of New York.
Late Night sponsors.
Malt Liquor, Discount Carpet.
Late Night doesn't have jovial weather guy who launches unsuccessful diet every
other week.
Oh!
There you go.
Live at Five.
Temperature is from Central Park.
Late Night, Jokes from Old Reader's Digest.
Number six.
On Live at Five, celebrities are often interviewed by Sue.
On Late Night, Dave is often sued by celebrities.
Play on words.
Number five.
Tony Guida doesn't do show without pants.
Ah, always a good one.
Number four.
Cabbies seldom drive up on curve trying to hit Live at Five hosts.
Exactly.
Number three.
Total Strangers rarely set up housekeeping in homes of Live at Five
personalities.
Number two.
One's infotainment.
The other's intermation.
And the number one reason Live at Five and Late Night are different.
Sometimes Live at Five gets laughed.
Oh!
All right.
Are they really worried about their mortgage?
Well, Steve McDonald, Jerry Mulligan, it's The Late Night with David Letterman.
Top ten lists with David Letterman and the Late Night writers.
Thank you very much for being with us.
Sail it a day for us.
We will.
We will.
Tell him we wish he could have come over, but, you know.
He doesn't like to do television.
Okay.
Thanks a lot.
Sue and Tony.
Well, we can't do anything because we have no camera.
There's no camera here.
Oh, here it is.
We'll shout real loud that if you'll join us tomorrow, if you'll join us
tomorrow, we'll
have Milton Bale here.
Thank you, and good night.
He has no pants on.
You've been watching Live at Five.
Now stay tuned for News for New York.
From WNBC-TV, this is News for New York at Six with Chuck Scarborough, Pat
Harper,
Al Roker with the weather, and Len Berman Sports.
Good evening.
There are fresh signals tonight that New York City may be digging itself deeper
into a financial
hole.

Promoting the 1st Top Ten Book on Letterman & Live at Five, October 9, 1990

Thank you very much.
Thank you.
Dave, is everything alright? I see you conferring with the cameraman.
I was over there chatting with Bailey.
You were?
I just went over to say hello.
That's nice. It's nice to develop a relationship with your crew.
How you doing?
I'm fine. You know, speaking of crew, I think this is really more than a crew.
More like family.
It's a family. Don't you think it is?
Yeah, yeah.
It's a love kind of family.
You know, speaking of families, I've been watching the Today Show.
I watched the Today Show here on NBC, the morning show.
Jane Pauley is gone, as you know.
Bryant Gumbel is there.
Tippi Hedren took over.
No, what's her name?
Tippi Hedren took over?
Whenever I can't think of a name, I just say Tippi Hedren.
What's her name?
Tippi Hedren.
Huh? What's her name, huh?
Faye.
Barbara who?
Deborah Norville.
Deborah Norville.
Deborah Norville, Bryant Gumbel, Joe Garagiola,
He's not right.
And then your regular cast, you have Ed McMahon and I don't know.
John.
And Tippi Hedren, I don't know.
Yeah.
So what were you thinking?
Gene Shalop and those things.
Yeah.
What were you thinking?
Here on NBC.
Now over on ABC, they have the Good Morning America.
They have that over there.
Yeah.
Now you know, I don't know if you are aware of this.
When Jane Pauley left to go off and pursue her singing career, Good Morning
America, their
audience like doubled overnight.
Virtually doubled or tripled overnight.
I understand that is true, yes.
So, all of us in the industry were interested by this and so we kind of kept a
close eye
on the Good Morning America.
And now over the last six, seven months, they've continued to maintain this
vast morning viewing
audience.
So periodically, I'll check in to see what they're doing.
All right.
Now this morning, they had a closing of the show at 8:55.
They have a big number with Peter Allen.
Really?
Yeah.
One of those, "Rio.
We're going to Rio.
Hey, we're going to Rio.
Yeah."
They do, yeah, they do one of those.
And they have like a full band and I'm thinking, "Jeez, is this Good Morning
America?"
Yes, it is Good Morning America.
And it finishes up and when Peter Allen finishes up with his Rio stuff, you
hear Charlie Gibson,
the host of the show, he says this, "Woo!"
Now.
Then you hear Joan London, the other host of the show, she says this, "Woo!"
I was stunned by that.
I couldn't think of anything else the rest of the day.
But there's Peter Allen, "Hey, it's going to Rio."
Yeah.
And then Charlie Gibson, America's most trusted morning show host and his co-host.
Anchor.
And all they can say is, "Woo!"
That's crazy.
I don't blame you.
It's not what you expect to hear first thing in the morning.
No.
Well, first of all, you don't expect to see Peter Allen at five minutes and
nine in the morning.
No, doing that.
You know, with the big sleeves and the things.
Doing that stuff.
You know.
Well, I guess that's how you get ratings at early in the morning.
Hey, you know, let's call over there.
We got a...
Did you know anything about this book, by the way?
Oh, the book that...
Yeah, there's a big late night book out.
Oh, the late night...
Now, let's call our friend Meg across the hall there at Simon & Schuster.
That's the top ten.
Hal, Hal, turn on the external camera, will ya?
Alright, that's our director.
There, open the blinds.
There we go.
There's Meg over there.
Alright, now let's call Meg.
We've known Meg for...
Geez, has it been a year, Paul, do you think?
Yeah, she works in the Pocket Books division of Simon & Schuster Publishing.
And her window is...
We'll see if she knows any...
Huh?
Her window is right across from our...
Yeah, there she is.
She has beautiful auburn hair.
Look at that.
She's a lovely woman.
We've grown to know her.
We've grown to love her.
And the phone should be ringing any minute now.
Hey, we're going to...
What?
Yes, we're going to Rio.
Hey, hey, it's all...
Meg, it's me, Dave.
Hey, how are ya?
Wave to America there.
Meg, what are those flowers you have there?
Flowers.
Oh, did we hear Meg?
What?
I was supposed to ask if we can put her voice on the air.
Oh.
I'm sorry, Meg.
Sure.
Can we put your voice on the air?
Yes.
Okay.
What are those flowers there, Meg?
Uh, they're just decorative.
I think they're called status.
Yeah, status.
Now, let me see that lady.
It looks like you have a little suit on, a little dress.
What is that?
It's a dress.
Yeah, that's very nice.
Could you stand up?
Is that new?
Very, very nice, Meg.
Thank you.
Yeah.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
And Meg, I'd just like to add, "Woo!"
Now...
Whoa!
Uh, Meg?
Hello?
Hello?
Oh, now what happened here?
Did I disconnect her?
Oh, I disconnected.
Oh, man.
All right, Paul.
Dialing music, Paul.
We have to call Meg back.
It's dialing music time.
How could I have disconnected poor Meg?
Now she probably hates me.
Yeah.
That ought to be some kind of law.
You don't need Peter Allen on television before noon.
Now she's gone!
Oh, no!
Meg is gone.
We're screwed.
Hi.
Oh, hi, Meg.
It's me.
Okay.
What the hell's going on over there?
I don't know.
I might ask you that same thing.
Oh, well...
You were...
It was only, Meg, we were just disconnected.
I'm sorry.
Well, I'm sorry, too.
You gave me a heart attack there.
You vanished.
Now, anyway, so Meg, how have you been?
I've been fine.
Have you missed me?
Well, sure.
Yeah.
What'd you do this weekend?
I went to my 10th year high school reunion.
Wow, you went to high school?
Yeah.
It's a joke, Meg.
I'm just joking with you.
And how was that?
It was better than I had thought.
Where did that take place?
In some loft kind of space down in Soho.
Uh-huh.
And had people recognized you from the show?
Had they seen you from being on TV at all?
A few, not too many.
Yeah.
All right, now, Meg.
Yes?
Uh, you know, we have this book here.
We have the big late night top 10 book.
Now, is that published by your company?
Yes, it is.
Yeah, is it Simon & Schuster or is it pocketbooks?
No, it's pocketbooks.
Now, you know, they gave us like a huge advance for this.
Well, yeah.
Yeah, like a million dollars or something.
Oh, at least.
Yeah, yeah.
Now, is the thing out?
Is it selling now?
Is it on the streets?
Well, it should be, yes.
Yeah, and is it doing well?
Are people upset about it or are they pleased about it?
I think they're pretty pleased.
They're pleased so far.
All right.
Have you got a copy there?
Um, I can get one.
Yeah, yeah.
Quick, can you get one for us?
Get me a copy.
Oh, I love the way she pushes people around over there.
She just snaps her fingers and people race around.
Hey, you ever watch Good Morning America?
I have watched it in the past.
Did you see it this morning?
No.
Peter Allen was on.
Did you watch?
Oh, of course.
Oh.
Being a big Peter Allen fan.
Yeah.
I have the scrapbook I like to update as often as I can.
All right, Meg, now do me a favor.
Yes.
Hold the big book up here close to the window so we can see what it looks like.
Okay.
All right, now there's my goofy looking face.
Now, Meg, you see those blue things, those blue little rectangles?
Those little decorative.
Do you know what those are?
Um, they're decorative flourishes.
Yeah, but you know, they're supposed to be like these blue cards here.
Oh.
See, the ones I'm holding there, they're supposed to be those as if we were
throwing those in the air.
Oh, I didn't know that.
Yeah, yeah.
Have you read the book?
Well, I've looked through it, yes.
Yeah, but the question, of course, Meg, was have you read the book?
You mean cover to cover?
Yes, cover to cover.
I understand it's quite a page turner.
It is, but you know, it's the kind of book I think you kind of pick up and leaf
through.
Yeah, Meg, how's that Tara? Was that her name?
Yeah, that was her name.
Yeah, she still worked there?
She does.
I think she's fine.
Yeah, well, give her my best.
I will.
She's a lovely woman, isn't she?
She seems very nice.
Yeah.
I don't know her that well.
Oh, you don't know her that well?
No.
How old a woman is she?
In her 20s.
In her 20s.
All right.
Okay, Meg, that's perhaps for another time.
Now, can you do me a favor and page through that and just find a little list
there and you'll
read a top 10 list for us tonight.
Do you mind doing that?
No, I don't mind at all.
Okay.
By the way, I'm sorry about that disconnect.
It really wasn't my fault.
Well, I'm sorry if it was my fault.
No, it wasn't your fault.
You just, though, you sounded kind of huffy.
Well, I really wasn't.
All right.
Okay.
Just leaf right through there.
Find an extra funny one because we'd like to get out from under this advance,
you know.
Okay.
Let's see.
Um, Campbell's top 10 least favorite, least popular soup.
Okay.
Ladies and gentlemen, tonight's top 10 category is Campbell's top 10 least
favorite soups.
Are you ready, Meg?
Yes, I'm ready.
Okay, here we go.
Yeah.
Okay.
Number 10, cream of gristle.
Cream of gristle.
Number nine, tomato garagiola.
Tomato garagiola.
All right.
Number eight, old-fashioned grease and weasel.
Old-fashioned grease and weasel.
Okay, continue, please.
Number seven, mink bisque.
Number seven is mink bisque.
And number six is turkey with platformate.
Turkey with platformate.
All right.
Number five, tap water and lawn trimmings.
Number five is tap water and lawn trimmings.
Number four, uh, Turkish prison surprise.
Uh-huh.
All right.
We all like that one.
Okay.
That's a good one.
Number three, Bryant gumbo.
Number three is Bryant gumbo.
Okay.
Number two is sideburns and barley.
What was, that was number two is what?
Sideburns and barley.
Sideburns and barley.
Okay.
Number one least popular Campbell's soup is?
Manhattan style Windex and shrimp.
Windex and shrimp.
Thank you very much Meg.
Okay.
Goodbye.
Okay.
All right.
Are we all set?
Hey, we got a great show.
Blair Brown is here.
Boy, that Meg is sweet, isn't she?
She is the greatest.
A nice, solid woman.
Okay.
All right.
All right.
Are we all set?
Hey, we got a great show.
Blair Brown is here.
Boy, that Meg is sweet, isn't she?
She is the greatest.
A nice, solid woman.
She is the greatest.
How old a woman do you think she is?
I don't know.
We established her.
I think she's like 26 or 27.
In her 20s.
Yeah.
The Black Crows and T.C. Boyle.
Author T.C. Boyle.
Author of East is East.
We'll be out here in a minute.
What else?
Am I forgetting anything?
All right.
We'll do a commercial and then, you know, come on back.
All right.
We'll do a commercial and then, you know, come on back.
Wow, wow, thank you, thank you, wow, thank you.
Did you see the big country western, oh, by the way, Hal, turn on the Live at
Five program, see what's going on over there.
These are the people across the hall every afternoon.
Walk around as opposed to standing still.
Oh, no, no, Hal, Live at Five, nothing from your little home video collection.
Now, we have writers, our own writers are appearing on the show.
Have they been on already?
Huh, they what?
Not yet.
Will they be on?
All right, thank you.
Will you let me know the second they're on, Hal?
Yes.
Okay.
So, the country western hall of fame all-time all-star music awards for country
western people.
Did you see that last night?
I saw a little of it, yeah.
Yeah, what do you think of that show?
I thought it was a terrific show.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
A lot of good music.
How did you feel about it?
I enjoy it.
I enjoy it.
As you know, one of my lifelong show business goals and dreams is to date the
Judds.
I don't blame you.
Both of them at once.
Are we ready or are they on yet?
Okay, they're across the hall.
Plug in the sorry book.
Plug in the top ten book.
Although the audience seemed to enjoy Meg's...
Meg's version of the top ten was very nice.
All right, so I'll bring out our first guest.
If anything transpires over there at Live at Five, we'll punch it right up, all
right?
Okay.
Okay, here we go.
Welcome back to the program, kids.
Blair Brown is with us and the Black Crows and T.C. Boyle.
And are they on yet, Hal?
They're on right now.
All right, let's eavesdrop.
Don't tell them we're going to listen.
These