Name: Three Jeff Martin-penned Musical Numbers on Letterman, 1986-89
Uploaded: 2019-01-05T03:57:55.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Three Jeff Martin-penned Musical Numbers on Letterman, 1986-89' from Don Giller on Comedy Buff. Published 2019-01-05. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Three Jeff Martin-penned Musical Numbers on Letterman, 1986-89' from Don Giller on Comedy Buff. Published 2019-01-05. Transcript available.

Letter number four, our last letter for the evening, we have a wonderful show
coming up,
stand by. Dear Dave, what was life like before television? Do you remember,
just wondering,
Anita, Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania? Gosh, let me see, life without television? Wow,
you know,
that's hard to even imagine what it would be like, actually, life without
television.
Boy, isn't television great? Gee, what would I ever do without TV? Gosh.
Life without TV, it wouldn't be nice, no Cagney and Lacey, no Miami Vice, no
NBC, no ABC, no C, yes,
no one to bring us the shows we love best.
Stop, stop, stop, stop, please stop, no, oh my God, no, no way, stop, no, oh,
oh, no.
Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave, it's all right, everything's
all right,
you were just having a bad dream. Oh my God, Paul, I thought I was at the Emmys.
Oh, oh, geez. Take it easy, Dave. Oh, I guess I'm a little more concerned about
this than I thought.
Yeah. Let's see a ball, ladies and gentlemen.
Late Night with David Letterman will not be seen tonight so that we may bring
you the following special presentation.
election day, election day, election day, the day Americans can have their say.
We're back in Bush, on the caucus we dote, but we all agree it's important to
vote.
I cannot tell a lie. Election day, four score and seven years ago.
Election day, election day, hip hip hooray, now let's go to the polls.
Excuse me, hold it, hold it, hold it, I'm sorry, excuse me.
Paul, seriously, hold it, stop, thanks. Hi.
Look, I certainly appreciate your enthusiasm and everything, but yesterday,
election day was yesterday.
Yesterday? That's right. Yesterday and Bush won. It's over.
Gee, we've been rehearsing so hard for the Get Out and Vote special, we didn't
even notice.
And now we're too late even to vote.
Well, Biff, I wouldn't worry about that, you see, because even in the closest
national elections,
there are still millions and millions of votes separating the winner and the
loser.
So my vote really doesn't even matter.
Well, exactly. Feel better?
Yeah.
Yeah. And, Paul, gosh, I'm sorry, I hope you're not too disappointed.
Oh, I'm Canadian, I don't care if you elect a monkey.
Right, good, that's the spirit. Okay, okay, Hal, roll the regular opening, all
right?
Letter number three, dear Dave, when is Tom Snyder coming back?
Patiently waiting, Chris Reeder, Charlottesville, Virginia.
Uh, geez, you know, Chris, I don't know when Tom Snyder is coming back.
Someday, I guess, maybe, I suppose, uh, you see, Tom has got that wonderlust in
him.
And I guess only he'll know when he's found what he's looking for.
When you're coming back, Tom Snyder, how long you're gonna let those wheels
roll?
Tom Snyder, are you searching for America?
Tom Snyder, are you searching for your soul?
More, more beautiful music.
24 hours a day, nothing but beautiful music.
How come?