Name: Dennis Rodman on Late Show, August 20, 1996
Uploaded: 2019-10-23T00:16:09.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Dennis Rodman on Late Show, August 20, 1996' from Don Giller on Comedy Buff. Published 2019-10-23. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Dennis Rodman on Late Show, August 20, 1996' from Don Giller on Comedy Buff. Published 2019-10-23. Transcript available.

Welcome back to the broadcast. We have a lovely show, Dennis Rodman, Susan Molinari.
Let's bring out our first guest. What do you say, Paul? There you go. Our first
guest is the
most colorful, controversial, and tattooed player in all of basketball. He has
led the
NBA in rebounds for the last five years and has written this best-selling book
right here
entitled Bad As I Want to Be, the person reading aloud from it in the audience
right now. Ladies
and gentlemen, from the Chicago Bulls, please welcome back Dennis Rodman.
Have a seat, Dennis. Dennis Rodman.
Dennis Rodman. Dennis Rodman. Have a seat. How you doing?
It's not his actual hair, but it generates a genetic response. You can't help
yourself.
How you doing? I'm doing great. How about you? I'm pretty good. Thank you very
much for coming back to the program and congratulations on a championship there
in Chicago.
Thanks a lot. Must have been very exciting for you, huh?
It was all right. It was all right. Was this year the best basketball you've
played in your life, do you think, or not?
No. Really? No, no, no, no. It was just because I was on the Chicago Bulls.
That's it.
But as a teammate, as part of that machine, did that elevate your game somehow?
Did you help elevate their games?
No, not really. I mean, you know, 1989-90 was a good year, and this year was
more gratifying just because, you know, I proved a lot of people wrong that I'm
not crazy if everyone think I am.
Right. But there was never any question about you being a great ballplayer, so
that was never in doubt, right?
I'm that, but, you know, I'm a good ballplayer. People just don't understand
that I'm smart and intelligent.
Did you fit in well with the team? Did all the players like you? Did you get
along with all the guys?
Oh, yeah, we got along. You know, we had the black and white, but we mixed
together and made it, you know.
Good answer.
Good answer.
And then you signed a contract at the end of it. You're back there in Chicago
for another year. Is that the end?
One more year. One more year.
Is that what you wanted, just another year there?
Yeah.
And is this because Michael Jordan signed a contract for one year and you just
thought, well, if he's going to be there one more, I'll be there one more?
Well, I just think that I just, you know, I'm pretty much kind of burned out at
this particular time, but I'm going to go one more year so if I can do it again.
Right, right.
And after next year, I might just think about retiring.
See what happens. Oh, you might retire. What would you do when you're retired?
People taking it personally.
They take it totally personally.
And what would you do when you're retired?
I've got a lot of things I'm doing right now.
Yeah, what kind of stuff?
I've got a movie coming out next year.
Tell me about the movie. What is the film?
The film is about, well, the film is called The Colony.
The Colony?
Yeah, I call him Sean Clark Van Damme. That's what I call him.
So he's about yay tall, so basically he's going to be my partner. Can you
imagine that?
Is you and Van Damme in the film, then?
Yeah.
Yeah, that's interesting.
Mickey Rourke is the bad guy.
Mickey Rourke?
Yeah.
Well, this casting gets more and more interesting.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
And, um...
500 Mickey Rourke fans.
Yeah.
Okay.
And what is the film about, Dennis?
It's about...
It's about me being the middleman as far as...
Sean is an FBI agent.
Right.
And he decides that he wants to retire from the business, so he just cannot
retire from it,
but they've got to ship him to this island with the rest of the guys.
Right.
And he can't leave the island because he knows too much information.
But all of a sudden, he figures out that this guy's been chased for two years.
It's back home.
Now he has his girlfriend.
Now his girlfriend's going to have a baby.
Blah, blah, blah.
Now he's going to come back and get this guy.
Is it a musical?
Uh-uh.
Well...
Don't worry about...
I'm nuts.
I have no idea what I'm talking about.
See?
Ah.
Okay.
You got a lot of stuff going on, and then I heard today or yesterday that you're
getting married.
Congratulations.
Nice going.
Oh, thanks a lot.
Yeah.
When are you getting married?
Huh?
When are you getting married?
Oh, tomorrow at 12.30.
You're getting married tomorrow at 12.30?
Yeah.
Where about?
Here in town?
Rockefeller Center.
Rockefeller Center.
Well, good for you.
Who is the lucky woman?
She is a beautiful and talented woman.
Yeah?
Well, congratulations.
Thanks a lot.
I hope it works out well for you.
All right.
All right.
We've got to do a commercial, and we'll be right back with Dennis Rodman.
Welcome back to the program.
Dennis Rodman is here.
Bad as I want to be.
That's the name of the book.
Susan Molinari.
You're a Republican, aren't you, Dennis?
Yes, I'm not.
And Neville Brothers will be here.
Did you write the book yourself?
Did you write it with somebody?
I wrote it with someone.
And this is your life story, or like the last couple of years of your...
Oh.
That's better.
Nice crack, huh?
So, what about the Olympic dream team this time around?
Were you not on this dream team?
How do you feel about that?
And what are your thoughts about, you know, the Olympics and basketball and
that kind of thing?
Well, I don't think I would have had any fun.
Really?
How come you weren't on that team?
Just because, look at me.
Yeah, well, yeah.
I mean, just look at me.
I mean, they don't want something like this representing the United States.
No, but it's about all people.
That's what the Olympics are about.
It doesn't make any difference what she's looking like.
It sounds like it is.
It sounds like it is.
It sounds like it is out there.
What is the giant bus we saw you getting off of when you came in?
What is that?
Why do you have a bus?
Let me explain this.
You know, I have the MTV show.
This is the Rodman world to a black bus out there, okay?
All right.
That's my world to a bus out there, okay?
Where do you go in the bus?
See, that is right there.
That's the Rodman world to a bus.
I go all over.
Can you give me a ride home?
I give you a ride home.
I give you a ride to a lot of places.
I'll bring it to the bus.
Okay?
You know, Rodman world tour is all about, you know, doing wild, crazy things
like I rent G3s.
I rent Rolls Royces, things like this.
I take showers with people.
You take showers with people.
And, you know, I had a card game with, you know, Pastor Miller, the Foo Fighters,
and Kelsey Grammer, and a French kiss on my show.
So, you know, and all things like that.
French kiss on your show?
Oh, yeah.
Wow.
Isn't that exciting?
That's, you know, in the old days, you just bring guests out.
You have, like, a desk.
You have a couple of chairs.
No.
And you would talk.
No, my show's not like that.
It's not like that.
It's not like that.
It's not like that.
But, you know, all the guests on my show have to get their hair painted green,
so I just happen to have a little spray bar here to paint your hair green.
It's just like...
I gotta do it.
I gotta do it.
I gotta do it.
Don't hurt me.
Don't hurt me.
Don't hurt me.
All right.
There it is.
Lovely.
It's lovely.
I thought it would look goofy, but it don't look that bad.
It don't look that bad.
It's not that bad, is it?
It is.
All right.
Finish it up.
Good luck with the world tour.
Good luck with the book.
Good luck with the coming wedding.
We have to pause when we come back.
Susan Molinari will join us.
All right.
Good.
Good idea.
That's in case people are wondering if there's something different about my
hair.
Right.
We show them now exactly what happened.
That's right.
This looks like mini...
Can I get a nice tight shot of this head here?
This looks like mini items in my refrigerator.
Kind of round, kind of large, kind of green, kind of hairy.
Oh, no.
Thank you very much, sir.