Name: Jane Seymour Collection on Letterman, 1986-1996 Updated
Uploaded: 2020-05-04T20:34:38.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Jane Seymour Collection on Letterman, 1986-1996 Updated' from Don Giller on Comedy Buff. Published 2020-05-04. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Jane Seymour Collection on Letterman, 1986-1996 Updated' from Don Giller on Comedy Buff. Published 2020-05-04. Transcript available.

Jane Seymour Collection on Letterman, 1986-1996 Updated

two more questions bob duckhart asks in later years letterman was not afraid to
call out guests
to their face for their behavior such as bill o'reilly trump and dr phil could
letterman have
felt his show served a higher purpose and did not get the same satisfaction
with only getting laughs
well i do think he did take his interviews way more seriously but he was rough
on guests early
if they did if they weren't if it wasn't working i mean he he would do things
to them that left him in
tears uh jane seymour was an actress and i don't remember the specific thing
that happened but boy
she felt wrecked after an appearance with letterman how about when jane seymour
came on remember that
time jane seymour is is the paragon of gracious living and she's going to show
you her book of
old country homes and how you prepare a nice breakfast when you live in a
castle it costs 13
million dollars and you weren't up for that and she wasn't able to return
service either well that
you know that was i think our again our mistake because uh that's the kind of
thing although
unspoken there's no real policy about it we we sort of would would like to get
away from that's fine
she's a wonderful woman a very nice lady and if she wants to write a book and
show you photos of
how glamorous her life is that's just great you know more power to her but i
just you know
i don't know i i'm not fascinated by ways that she makes her life more
glamorous i don't really care
you know i hope the book was a huge success but uh so from that standpoint i
think it was probably
again our mistake for having her her on
here he is to our good friend mr paul shaffer
you seem to be able to know how to get through there exactly right underneath
the camera
yeah how you doing paul doing just fine you know night after night and people
always ask us and i
wonder myself do we do we have as much fun yeah as it looks like we have and
and what is the answer
i was asking you oh do we have as much fun no this is the most fun we have all
day don't you think
yeah certainly you know what concerns me though paul we're we're almost we're
two weeks away from
the holiday season and you and i really haven't had a chance to talk about how
things are going so
let's just take a second here and and visit for a minute okay great how are
things going uh fine with
me how are things with you pretty good great okay all right get that out of the
way
what else are we doing do what top ten list oh this is a good category tonight
from the home office
that by the way is the very definition of a smattering of applause that little
don't we have music that goes with this okay that's
this is this by the way is in lieu of actual show material
oh tonight oh tonight you know we have jane seymour on who has written this
wonderful book
entitled uh jane seymour's guide to romantic uh living is that it do we have a
copy of it here i'm
sure we must we couldn't really do the show without a copy of it right here so
oh excuse me i'm sorry
don't seem to think we don't have the book oh here it is right here thank you
very much barbara
games here it is right here jane seymour lovely woman and she's written this
book uh guide to
romantic living see there you go so she'll be out later to talk about that now
that brings me to uh
introduction of tonight's category uh tonight's category is bob rooney's
top 10 rules for romantic living there's bob over there one of our uh studio
technicians hi bob
also has his own rules for romantic living that's right that's right yeah i'd
love to hear those
try to try to get some exercise during the day paul you're a little wound up
uh here we go bob rooney's top 10 rules for romantic living number 10 never
tease a dog when he's eating
number nine when in doubt wear socks number eight wine plus beer never fear
beer plus wine also fine
press stone and gin think again number seven when getting a tattoo make sure
the girl gave you her
real name number six keep a t-shirt in the car so you can get into a 7-eleven
number five first anniversary paper fifth anniversary police scanner i didn't
realize that number four
make sure your date's done with her beer before you use it as an ashtray
number three start working on 60 minutes segment five minutes before airtime
oh i'm sorry that's one of andy rooney's rules mistake okay i'll take that out
of there uh number two
number two a man never stands so tall as when he sits down to do some show-off
driving number one
check mustache after eating cheetos
whoo
oh thank you our next guest is an actress who is known as the queen of the mini
series
she has starred in east of eden crossings captains and the kings seventh avenue
and on and on she's
also the author of this book right here we saw this earlier in the program it's
jane seymour's guide to
romantic living folks please welcome the ever romantic jane seymour
how are you nice to see you
it is you look terrific thank you you look great thank you very much for being
on the show i didn't
you know i didn't realize your hair was that long but it is quite i just had a
haircut oh is that right
yeah how much did they take off i think about that much often yeah well it
certainly looks nice
and those are great earrings thank you like chandeliers yeah it's in case you
didn't have any lights
tonight i thought i'd bring my own very thoughtful of you let's um let's talk
about the book is there
anything in this book jane uh that you need no it uh has anything to do with
lifting weight with your
teeth is there anything no but do you need romance oh yeah i'm always looking
for romance you are yeah
why did you write this book because i like romance yeah yeah no one did define
that for us romance no book
uh of course define romance
okay romance well i the point about romance and and what things that are
romantic is that they're
indefinable the things that happen they they create great memories and they're
things you live with for
the rest of your life now do you practice what is in this book sure i do i mean
it's full of my
mistakes in there all kinds of i've been married three times i mean there's
there's a lot of romance in
there so so you're you're you're now applying more romance to this marriage
than you did the first
two is that what you're telling us no no no no i've been i've been living romantically
since i was
born and my parents were still continue to live the original romantics is what
they were the original
romantics and uh as much as anything i wrote this book so that my mother would
have something to
give people for christmas this year to my great shop now now what's in the book
what are we talking
about here what is somebody going to learn about you and about being romantic
when they buy the
book which is about 20 bucks they'll they'll learn a bit about it it's going up
next year are you
selling a lot of these books it's in its third printing so and the next
printing it's going to be
22.50 so is that right yes if you want to bargain you buy it before it runs out
you know the old
joke don't you it's in its third printing the first two were smeared
so the book is doing quite well for you the book is doing quite well all right
let's get right to it
when we say guide to romantic living what are we talking about it's how to
bring romance back in
all right give us some examples of how that happens how you can make well um
for example i
kidnapped my husband it was pretty dramatic yeah what were the circumstances
the circumstances it was our
second wedding anniversary he'd already surprised me by giving me um a
beautiful diamond pendant in a
bottom of champagne glass about three days before our anniversary when i least
expected it i was
about to drink it and suddenly there was you know this foreign object in the
bottom i was naturally
thrilled and i had to think of something to top this with so i um arranged with
his office that i
could uh take him away from his work for three days and i organized a holiday
to uh mexico and on
a monday morning all dressed up in his three-piece suit ready to go to work i
told him he wasn't
allowed to leave the house till nine o'clock at nine o'clock a car came i shoved
him in the back
and took him off to um a place i wouldn't tell him where it was right right
because i had one phone
call back to his work to make sure everything was okay and we ended up in cabos
and lucas he in a
three-piece wool suit which was a little uncomfortable and um you know the
point is that it did it was a
surprise element it was the fact that this is a man who's always in control of
his life and i took the
control away and he loved it did you pistol whip him or anything no no i didn't
do anything like that
but you know what happened we got there and i thought i'd arranged the most
beautiful wonderful
room in this hotel and we found these lovely little cabanas on the beach right
by the water's edge and
we thought well whatever the cost is we'll go down there money's no money's no
object and um the hotel
manager told us that would be half the price so we thought these people are
really crazy in mexico
they don't know a good thing when they see it well the next morning we're notoriously
untidy people
you know it's a night of great romance we woke up to find everything floating
in seven inches of
water yeah yeah tide came in tide came in and wash it all away but see now jane
see it's easy to be
romantic when you can afford to go to cabo san lucas for a three-day weekend
and you can afford a car
and you're drinking champagne and there's a forty thousand dollar gem in the
right but what about
average folks absolutely that's why i wrote the book it's all about things you
can do for nothing
yeah okay we'll do a commercial and then you give us an example of one of those
romantic things and
we'll just see how that stacks up
you're also in the uh the holiday anniversary issue of playboy magazine
i know that's a shock isn't it well these are pretty nice no yeah what are you
doing there exactly
um i'm climbing i'm climbing over the walls of my house you know this is a
funny story they
pretty provocative photos and you're you're fully clothed for the most part
yeah i'm the first woman
ever to be clothed in playboy and i'll tell you what happened 15 years ago when
i was a young thing
and i was doing a bond film they said to me would i do play well they offered
me sums of money and
everything and i said i don't believe in being nude i just don't you know i
have nothing no problems
with it but i just don't think it's very sexy so 15 years later i'm not there
i can't tell with the story 15 years later you're back in playboy fully clothed
no no i wasn't in
playboy 15 years later i had two kids and i thought no they said do do it your
way maybe you have a
point well you're a fabulous baby so anyway what uh okay all right now tell us
tell us something
that would be inexpensive that would be a good way to bring romance into our
you can do the same
thing you just don't have to go to mexico you can go to um well roosevelt
island right take a picnic
and uh watch the manhattan skyline apparently there's a beautiful park there
there's always
wonderful places but you do this kind of stuff every day aren't you just
driving your husband crazy no
thank you i probably drive him crazy but not by doing these things every day
but it's not to do
everything every day you don't have to do anything if you don't want to a lot
of people used to do
really fun stuff when they first met and then they completely forget about
doing it later on in
their lives and all they do is bitch and moan about about the problems and the
you know the mortgage and the
rest of it and and they always have their tv dinners in front of the tv and i'm
just suggesting why not
take it outside for a change or have a picnic in the park or whatever listen i
realize i realize
this book is over your head no it's not it is
get back to playboy no it's not i think you were more amused with the one with
the blue cover
no no it's it'