Name: Biff Henderson Interrupts Collection on Letterman, 1989-1990
Uploaded: 2021-03-05T14:44:30.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Biff Henderson Interrupts Collection on Letterman, 1989-1990' from Don Giller on Comedy Buff. Published 2021-03-05. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Biff Henderson Interrupts Collection on Letterman, 1989-1990' from Don Giller on Comedy Buff. Published 2021-03-05. Transcript available.

and it's of course rush hour it's very crowded and uh so i decided i just get
up my seat and
let lady die sit down i think you know because she's hey hey oh dave you know i
don't get that
many laughs you could have waited till that one was done excuse me dave yes
yeah i'm sorry
i'm sorry but i have a question for you i know you do oh okay i'm just
wondering
is tony randall on the show tonight tony randall yeah let me see kevin
no he's not no okay excuse me one second one second sorry tony not tonight
you know that biff sure is acting odd lately uh here's an interesting fact
ladies and gentlemen
edgar allen poe in his entire life excuse me how could you kill my mic for a
second thank you
edgar allen poe in his entire life never once uttered the words l.a gear
pal turn the mic back on can you you know yesterday a 14 year old youngster was
arrested for
carrying a loaded weapon here into a manhattan junior high school and i'm
telling you something
ladies and gentlemen new york city school teachers are getting sick and tired
of always having to say
did you bring enough ammunition for everybody because if you didn't then we're
gonna have to send you home
it's miff henderson look it's our it's one of our students
you know we're we're doing a show now but i'm just curious about one thing
could you tell me what
the weather's gonna be like tomorrow weather tomorrow yeah well i think it's
gonna be pretty
nice because today was lovely and i think tomorrow they're probably about the
same so it'd be mild sunny
mild clear skies skies highs in the mid to upper 40s chance of probability of
precipitation less than
20 percent i would say now on the weekend we may get some shower activity but
for tomorrow it's
going to be solid gold money in the back i can't write this fast wait a minute
all right all right
up in the middle 40s mild middle to upper 40s lovely day okay all right thank
you sure biff
it's it's going to be mild sunny and clear skies up up in the middle 40s
it's going to be lovely okay thank you very much okay see you later all right
i i don't know much about willard but i do know where he's not going he's not
going to have a drink
with bryant so i think that's obviously thanks biff anytime date yeah sure
wait a minute
i think we've signed off
five minutes to live by uh and then sunday i did something really stupid uh if
you smoke cigars or
know anything about them sometimes if you don't have a humidor and i don't have
a humidor so
i'll try and keep them in my refrigerator thinking that maybe that will uh
retain the freshness
and all it really does is make them cold but you you keep them in there because
you think it's
you're doing something to prolong the life of the cigar so okay i absent-mindedly
run into the
kitchen grab one real quick and i light it up halfway through 60 minutes i
realize i'm smoking a hot dog
i'm smoking out
oh gosh it's biff henderson paul look it's biff
you know i i know it'd be tough to prove but we're right in the middle of a
show i'm sorry i'm sorry
forgive me i'm just wondering what can i do for you do you have a subway token
sir a subway to a subway token i might i might have one
i need one is that one yeah that's one yeah oh that's great be careful with
that okay okay you're
not leaving are you um thank you dave
that's not odd he's really been behaving strangely lately he comes here you go
mr trump here you are
thank you thank you thanks dave thank you i left my wallet at home thanks
is that what he did this is donald trump
donald trump now you gotta wonder about this guy he's worth a billion dollars
and sunday what does
he do he hosts wrestlemania
hi how you doing uh today uh house speaker jim wright wrote a heartfelt letter
to adnan khashoggi
alleged to be the wealthiest man in the world uh offering to appear as a
character witness
for him uh if he could buy a thousand copies of his book at fifty dollars a pop
so huh worked it what what oh hi ladies and gentlemen one of our stage managers
biff henderson
i've got a question for you have i been replaced no no i thought maybe this is
how they'd let me know
no i don't think so no sir okay but anyway i gotta i really have a serious
question all right good
well this is the time for it okay what i need to know let's ice this crowd
right down
to hell with the levity let's get serious i'm curious about
i i say to hell with the levity let's get serious
yes biff what can i do for you uh i'm trying to remember now uh-huh in all
sincerity what i need
to know you know you have lovely eyes
yes it's not easy i know okay okay what i'm curious about the lady what what is
the name of
that lady on the talk show in the morning what is her name is it vicky lee or kathy
lee vicky
lee vicky vicky vicky lee right paul vicky lee i i'm not sure about that vicky
i don't think
it's vicky lee what is it i don't think it's kathy lee kathy lee kathy lee kathy
lee kathy lee
kathy lee uh crosby crosby crosby no no no no i don't think it's crosby what is
it
uh i come on paul well i know it's it's gifford it's gifford i believe
it's kathy lee prizes at stake over there kathy lee gifford okay we're sure
okay okay thank you
thank you i appreciate that didn't mean to interrupt but that was that was didn't
mean to interrupt but
yet you clearly did interrupt acting very strangely here yeah the correct name
is yeah kathy lee yeah
gifford kathy lee gifford i got it thanks biff thanks okay all right
give him a little showbiz tap on the face he gave him the showbiz tap a little
showbiz tap on the face
nice go on biff let me get this straight you didn't mean to interrupt no oh
lord
according to the new york times ramada inn one of the biggest hotel chains in
the world uh will sell
825 hotels and motels for the price of 540 million dollars and to make the deal
really attractive
they're going to throw in about 200 bottles of those little shampoo things so
what did i do wrong to
that one what throw in about 200 of those tiny bottles of shampoo that's what
the
what do you got there is that for me no no i need the other one folks on the
show the big folks on the
show card oh there it is uh barry manilow is here julie brown and uh baseball
bats they take you know
they're made out of ash huge trunk trees of ash that's right ashen trees from
one tree how many
bats do you think you can get from one tree just one bat per tree no no no no
no no no
not like 400 about 450 really i don't know i just made that up well we'll find
out later on find
out who's going to make one here right for us we can stay up late enough we'll
see well no i think
we can stay up late what's the matter i'm certainly going to be up i have no
plans to go to bed all
right good for you i'm up uh our first guest uh our david excuse me excuse me dave
you're only
half dressed what the hell's going on back there what did you join the navy or
something well you
know i know that uh paul schaefer is the band leader right but i was just
wondering biff henderson one
of our stage managers yes biff do you need a show on the road yes do you need a
sidekick i need a
sidekick no no no paul is the musical director he's uh my close friend he's a
very funny individual
very talented individual and i and i would guess in the broadest interpretation
of the word
paul would be considered my sidekick and an answer to that question no no no we're
trying to do a
show here by the way oh i'm sorry yeah boy he is really behaving strangely uh i'm
sorry no oh thanks
yeah yeah you just never know who's going to turn up on dave's tv clubhouse do
you
one of those cameos yeah i guess so i guess so poor biff wasn't changed yet he
was in the middle
of his little outfit there and he was beside himself bless his heart got the v
sweater on
no no no this show already seems long
i uh i thought this was kind of interesting because of recent developments in
san francisco now
uh a judge has ordered morton downey jr to stay away from himself so i
something like that
thank you
all right one of our stage managers biff henderson we're trying to do a show
here
i'm i'm really i'm really sorry to interrupt you today what can i do for you i'm
just wondering
do they still have movies in this do they still have what movies geez movies i
don't think so no
i don't think they've had movies here in quite some time oh theater was
originally built for films but
i don't i don't think so oh okay i was just wondering okay good luck yeah yeah
no problem
guys guys i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry guys they don't they don't have they
don't have movies in
this theater no thanks no no movies at all but listen you're more than welcome
to stay to see dave's show
you're more than welcome to stay to see dave's show thanks a lot
you know you know uh friday night we had the genius three-year-old yeah and and
tomorrow it's the
genius juggler yeah that tells me that morty is down to the g's in his rolodex
uh it's time ladies and gentlemen for one of my favorite comedy segments those
funny funny
maplethorpe photos paul music for this yeah those funny funny funny funny maple
thought photos yeah
okay very nice paul here we go funny maplethorpe photo number one hey wait a
minute that's mcneil and
lair here we go funny maplethorpe photo number two oh please let this be an
eggplant
funny maplethorpe photo number three i'm sorry mr gear no shirt no shoes no slurpee
okay
hey hey hey excuse me oh look it's one of our stage managers biff henderson
i'm right i'm right in the middle of funny funny maplethorpe photos i'm sorry
yeah what's up
what's the combination of your locker again oh my locker yeah all right here
let me write this down
okay okay now this this one you go around twice and stop on that and then go to
the left there
and then back to the right on that one it should open right up okay i won't
give it okay good luck
thank you oh boy the young man's been acting terribly strange lately what the
hell is i hope it's not
not some kind of an emergency
i nearly suffocated in there connie what are you doing in dave's locker i was
waiting for dave
listen listen i know this is a little unorthodox but maybe you could help me
get on the show biff
i've done you enough favors
nice job there nice nice going i don't try that'll turn hey hey hey wait oh he's
going back in the
locker all right leave him in there then all right do we have any any more time
here for the uh
funny uh funny no i guess we don't all right we'll do a commercial we'll be
right back