Name: SCTV Cast Members on Letterman and Carson, Part 4 of 12: 1986-1988
Uploaded: 2021-08-03T18:04:27.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'SCTV Cast Members on Letterman and Carson, Part 4 of 12: 1986-1988' from Don Giller on Comedy Buff. Published 2021-08-03. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'SCTV Cast Members on Letterman and Carson, Part 4 of 12: 1986-1988' from Don Giller on Comedy Buff. Published 2021-08-03. Transcript available.

SCTV Cast Members on Letterman and Carson, Part 4 of 12: 1986-1988

Thank you, Paul. Thank you very much, folks.
Welcome back here to the show.
My next guest was one of the cast members of SCTV
and one of the original McKenzie brothers.
His very own special called The Incredible Time Travels of Henry Osgood
premieres on Showtime on March 9th.
Please welcome Dave Thomas.
Hey.
Hi, Dave.
Good to see you again.
Nice to see you.
You know, here in New York and I guess maybe other parts of the country,
they're still running SCTV on, I think here they're running it on the...
PBS.
Yeah, yeah.
Very entertaining program.
Oh, thank you.
Yeah, it's very, very funny.
It's good bread and butter for me, David.
Yeah, you folks did a really nice job.
How you been?
You just got back from Mardi Gras.
That's right.
What was that?
Now, why did you go down there?
Were you invited or were you just touring or...?
Yeah, they invited me down to be the king of one of their parades.
Now, what does that mean?
It means that you ride in a float and throw beads at people that seem to want
them.
Uh-huh.
And I went down there.
Larry Bud Melman was down there, too.
He's sort of a permanent mascot with this group.
I didn't realize that.
Yeah, he's a real party monster, isn't he?
Bubba Melman, as they call him down there.
Sure.
Yeah, yeah.
Now, did you start to get into a little Bob Hope there?
Just a little?
Yeah, maybe I kind of slid into it a little bit.
And you have a different twist on Bob, don't you?
Well, I just got sick of doing Bob as Bob, so I thought it'd be funny if Bob
Hope was Scottish.
You know, and he was kind of like,
Hi, ladies and gentlemen, this is Bob Hope coming to you live from Scotland.
But I want to tell you that's great, eh?
How about that Loch Ness Invitational, eh?
Loch Ness.
Home of long-knit monsters, whiskey, and kilts.
Sounds like Glasgow on a Saturday night, if you know what I mean, eh?
So, I just thought I'd give myself a twist that would make it more interesting,
you know?
Sounds good to me.
You had a baby since we last saw you?
I had a little boy, he's two years old now, talking to Blue Streak.
I got him a little doll, one of those talking Teddy Ruxpins, and, uh...
Well, how do those work?
Everything you say is repeated by the, uh...
No, no, it's tapes in the doll's back, and he thought it was magical.
It sings lullabies...
Oh, I see.
...and talks to him, and then the other day, he peeled back the Velcro strip on
the back
and saw the tape, and he's two, and he says,
What the hell is this?
And my wife looked at me, he said,
Where the hell did you get that from?
And I said, sure as hell, it wasn't me.
You gotta watch what you say.
No, I have to be very, very careful.
They pick up every undesirable part of your personality.
Now, uh...
We mentioned the McKenzie brothers.
Now, what became of, uh, Doug and, uh...
Well, Doug and...
Doug and Bob.
Doug and Bob.
What became of Doug and Bob?
Well, uh, the real life Doug and Bob are Doug's here, and Bob's in England
doing a movie,
but, uh, uh, uh, I just think it kind of, with the exception of the Pizza Hut
commercials,
where they're still going strong, uh, it just kind of petered out.
We have a, uh, place up on Lake Simcoe, and we'd drive up there.
Now, where's Lake Simcoe?
It's, uh, yeah, that's right.
Well, why should you know that, right?
It sounds like a Sears product.
Well, it's, uh, it's north of Toronto.
It's a little cottage that we got, and on our way up there, we saw this Great
White North Diner,
and we drove by it a few times and just thought, look at that, the guy stole
the name of the Great White North.
How about that?
Which, that was the Bob and Doug segment on ICTV.
Yeah.
Yeah, Great White North.
Then one time, I decided, well, I'm going to pull in here.
You know, my wife wanted a milkshake, and I'll surprise the guy, you know,
and Doug McKenzie himself will walk in.
I went in, and the guy stands behind the counter, and he says, can I help you?
And I kind of, hoping to be recognized, said, yeah,
well, uh, give me a great white shake, eh?
And he said, we don't have milkshakes here.
And I said, oh, okay, then take off, eh?
And he said, yeah, take off yourself.
He turned to my wife, and he said, can I help you?
And she said, I'm with him.
He said, I'm sorry.
Didn't recognize me, so I just left.
I wasn't going to give him my business.
You know, good for you.
But, you know, everybody who, uh, who, uh, uh, we talked to from Canada.
Yeah.
Uh, has always, has all,
they all have the same story about working with Paul
in the production of some, uh, musical.
It was at Godspell.
Godspell.
Did you work with Paul in Godspell?
Yes.
Everybody was in that show up in Canada.
It was like a black hole for talent.
Just kind of sucked everybody in, you know?
Uh, yeah, that, I'm, uh, we were walking,
Paul and I were walking when we were doing that,
that show down Yonge Street,
which they would shut off and turn into a mall.
Since then, they stopped because they couldn't control it.
But, uh, we were walking along,
and, uh, a bum came up to me and bumped into me.
And he was one of these guys that, you know,
you can't get away from him, you know?
Yeah.
And he said, you know, one of these guys, you know,
what'd you call me?
I didn't call you anything.
You calling me a nothing?
Okay, okay, give me a break, would you?
And, uh, so he started taking swings at me and, uh, and kicking me.
But he was so drunk, he couldn't hit me.
And I was trying to dodge him, and a crowd gathered around.
I said to Paul, Paul, please get a cop, would you?
And Paul runs off, and I'm dodging.
And the crowd is starting to get mean now,
because they, they see him falling down.
They, leave him alone.
Pick on someone your own size.
I'm trying to dodge this guy.
Paul comes back about three minutes later, and he said,
I couldn't find a cop, Dave, but I got a,
the best I could do was one of those meter guys.
And even he wouldn't know.
Yeah, what do you, you left out the part, though,
that Dave's, for some reason,
Dave mysteriously became an Irish person,
because he got mad at this guy.
Sure, and I'll be getting the cop then, you know, for no reason.
No, as I recall, Paul, my words were faith and bigar.
I think I'll be getting the cop.
Paul, you actually did find a meter maid?
I found a meter person.
This man needed a Mountie.
That's right.
We ran away like, like the children that we were then.
How long, how long was this show in production?
Uh, 17 years.
Yeah.
No, one year, actually.
One year, and it was, it just stayed there in Toronto.
You didn't tour with her or anything?
No.
Yeah, no.
A lot of fun?
Yeah.
Yeah, we had a good time.
Yeah, and we're still friends, strangely enough.
Isn't that marvelous?
Who else was in it?
Millions and millions of other people.
Eugene Levy was in it.
Marty Short was in it.
Andrea Martin was in it.
John Candy?
No.
John Candy was not in it.
Yeah.
On and on and on, though.
Gordon Thompson was in it.
Uh, this Showtime, the incredible travel time, the incredible time travels of
Henry Osgood
premieres on Showtime March 9th.
Nice short little title, isn't it?
Well, it sounds like a good show.
We're looking forward to it.
Yeah.
Nice to see you.
Congratulations on your family.
Thank you so much.
Good luck to you.
Uh, we'll be back to Assistant Houston.
We'll be back to Assistant Houston.
We'll be back to Assistant Houston.
We'll be back to Assistant Houston.
We'll be back to Assistant Houston.
We'll be back to Assistant Houston.
We'll be back to Assistant Houston.
We'll be back to Assistant Houston.
We'll be back to Assistant Houston.
We'll be back to Assistant Houston.
We'll be back to Assistant Houston.
We'll be back to Assistant Houston.
We'll be back to Assistant Houston.
Assistant Houston.
Hi.
Hi.
Hi.
Hi.
Hi.
Thank you for letting us into your living rooms.
Hi.
Uh, my first guest tonight is a dentist from Lexington, Kentucky.
Boy, that's a beautiful part of the world.
Have you ever been down there?
Love Lexington.
Great folks down there.
Gotta get down there real soon.
Love it.
Got some relatives down there.
Got some friends down there.
Gotta get down there to see.
Uh, as a hobby, this man has one of the strangest rock collections I've ever
seen.
You know I've seen an awful lot of rock collections.
Please welcome Mr. Joe Dougherty, ladies and gentlemen.
Dr. Joe Dougherty.
Hi, doctor.
Hi.
So nice to see you.
How are you?
Come on down here.
Thank you.
Lexington, Kentucky.
It's beautiful, isn't it?
I like it, though.
Yeah, beautiful.
All of those lovely, nicely painted white fences and the thoroughbreds down
there.
Of course farms.
Yeah, beautiful.
What kind of doctor are you?
A dental surgeon.
And this is a hobby that you started doing when?
About 20 years ago.
How did it begin?
Uh, a fellow brought me a brown rock that looked like a potato.
Uh-huh.
He wanted to cut.
Uh-huh.
I said, no, that looks like a baked potato.
So I --
I, uh, fixed it in fall and put it on one of the plates and everything's been
added since then.
Uh-huh.
And so -- so what you try to do here is collect food -- I'm sorry, collect
rocks.
Rocks that look like food.
That looks like food.
Yeah.
Right.
Okay.
Let's, uh, let's take a look at what you have.
And, uh, I understand it's pretty amazing stuff.
Um, pretty edible.
Uh-huh.
Yeah.
Did you do a television show with Andy Griffith and Don Nobbs?
Not yet.
No, no.
Uh, I thought first we'd have a few appetizers.
Uh, nice block of cheese.
Brown bread with wine.
All right.
Now, let's just take a second here.
What is this?
This is obviously not cheese.
It's a --
It's a --
It's a --
Piece of granite, isn't it?
Uh --
Marble.
Yellow quartzite from North Carolina.
Yellow quartzite.
Now, did you do anything, uh, to fix this up?
I took it and cut it and blocked.
Cut it and blocked.
Okay.
And then for the bread, what do we have?
Just a slice -- big slices of sandstone.
Uh-huh.
But you -- but you -- you know Goober Lindsey, though, don't you?
No.
Doesn't know Goober.
George Goober Lindsey?
You don't know him?
No.
Okay.
Well, let's go with this, uh, doctor.
What -- what -- what is the -- just -- you have it around?
Uh, no.
I'll go get it.
I know.
But once you go get it, then what do you do with it?
Just have it --
Well, some of it has to be polished.
Uh-huh.
Some I believe it just like it is.
Are you -- are you a lapidarius?
Yes.
Uh-huh.
Okay.
A lapidarius does what?
Polishes rocks?
Uh, cuts and polishes rocks.
Cuts and polishes rocks.
Right.
Okay.
The wine -- the wine is, uh, amethyst crystals.
Oh, amethyst is a semi-precious stone.
It's very beautiful, isn't it?
Right.
Very nice.
Okay.
And the grapes are jade.
Those are actual jade.
Now, you didn't find those because you bought them in some --
These -- these were a gift to add to the meal.
Okay.
Okay.
Very nice.
Then, um -- it's hot.
Yeah.
Oh, that's -- oh, now here -- now we're really getting somewhere, aren't we?
This -- this -- this is a child's special.
My rock burger.
Mm-hmm.
Rock fries.
And a rock coke.
Mm-hmm.
You haven't seen Aunt Bea in a while, have you?
No.
Okay.
Uh, we have -- now, what is -- what kind of rock is it?
Do you mind if I touch that?
Uh, try it.
All right.
Now, this is -- this looks like, again, some kind of --
Sandstone.
Sandstone.
And then here, we have the --
And then here, we have the --
And then here, we have the --
And then here, we have the --
And then here, we have the --
And then here, we have the --
And then here, we have the --
And then here, we have the --
And then here, we have the --
And then let's take a look at these fries, shall we?
Oh, they're there.
The fries are, again, these have been --
More yellow quartz.
Shaped and polished.
Right.
Now, do you have an item of food in your mind?
Like you said yourself, mm, I need a pot roast.
And then you go out looking --
Or do --
I brought one.
You have a pot roast.
Okay.
Or do you just stumble on things that look like food?
That's right.
Let's see.
Here's my -- here's my ham.
Kentucky ham.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That's ham, all right.
And this is -- again, this is a rock.
See, ladies and g