Name: Rudy Breaks Hearts| Bad Friends Around The World: Netherlands | Bad Friends Clips
Uploaded: 2020-05-07T16:00:14.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Rudy Breaks Hearts| Bad Friends Around The World: Netherlands | Bad Friends Clips' from Bad Friends Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2020-05-07. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Rudy Breaks Hearts| Bad Friends Around The World: Netherlands | Bad Friends Clips' from Bad Friends Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2020-05-07. Transcript available.

We're Bad Friends.
Bad Friends, around the world.
Who's this now?
This is going to be John Weber.
His name is John Weber.
Let's guess where he's from.
Hey guys.
Oh, fuck.
Hey, what's up?
No, he's from Brazil.
John Weber, where are you from?
Put on your video, John.
I'm stuck to you.
Oh, shit.
Oh, shit.
Oh, whoa, it's a boy band.
It's John and Weber.
It's John and Weber.
John and Weber.
No, we're from the Netherlands, man.
Oh, fuck.
Netherlands, Netherlands.
I love Netherlands.
Yeah, me too.
Amsterdam, you know?
You guys know who Val Nisselroi is?
Val Nisselroi?
No, no.
Oh, he was a soccer player for Manchester United.
Isn't it Val Nisselroi?
Yeah.
How are you guys doing, man?
Good.
I'm pretty good.
I like your hair.
Yeah.
Who's John Weber?
Which one's which?
Me, I'm John Weber.
Who's that guy?
Who's the other guy?
Yeah.
I'm Yoel Barton.
Yoel?
Yoel Barton.
We say a Joel here or Joel.
How do you spell your name, Yoel?
It's like the Y-O-E-L.
Yoel is correct.
Yeah, that is right.
Very good.
What are you guys doing?
We're just gaming and waiting for this call.
What are you?
Okay, so listen, I just finished Witcher 3.
What are you guys playing?
I'm playing, right now I'm playing like this quarantine.
I'm playing Fallout.
I've played it already.
I love Fallout 4?
Fallout 4?
Yeah, Fallout 4.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Oh, it's my favorite, one of my favorite games of all time.
It's my favorite game.
And I want to play The Witcher because of you, because I have it, but I never
really played
it.
So I really want to play it because I heard you talking about it.
Let me tell you something about The Witcher, okay?
Because I played Skyrim and I like Fallout, when you first play The Witcher,
you're like,
it's not the same, but you know what?
It has elements of those games in it, and I think the story is so strong, I
think you'd
really like it, my friend.
Okay, I'll try it.
How old are you guys?
I like your lips, by the way.
Can I just say this?
Super nice lips.
Don't do that.
Whoa!
Oh, shit.
My dick is hard.
My dick is hard.
My dick is hard, too, but yeah.
Yeah, look, John just goes, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
So in Fallout, are you building your own, like, I remember when you played
Fallout, you
could build your own, like, house and stuff?
Yeah, like, that's my favorite.
Like, the first time I played it, I made, like, the biggest settlement ever.
Oh, yeah, the settlement, yeah.
I'm making it again, yeah.
Hey, Yoel, how old are you guys?
How old is Yoel and John?
How old are you guys?
I'm 17.
I'm 18.
It's good to see you young guys connecting about video games.
It's cute.
I like that.
Yeah.
Let me ask them, then, is it weird that I'm 48 years old and I know exactly
what you're
talking about when it comes to video games?
Yes.
No, it's fine.
It's fine.
No, I like it.
I wish I would game, like, when I'm 40.
You will.
Oh, you will.
Trust me.
Yeah.
I can see you right now.
I can see into your future.
You will.
You'll be gaming a lot.
Let me ask these guys the same question I asked before, if you don't mind.
Yeah, please.
All right, so you guys aren't gay, right?
Straight guys?
No.
Okay, but let's say you were gay, right?
Yeah, so pretend that you're gay.
Yeah, pretend that you're gay, right?
Which, all right, which one of us would you date?
Okay, it's like the situation, I guess.
Like dating, I think Andrew, I would choose Andrew because I know you're much
maintenance.
Yeah, you're high maintenance, he's saying.
Yeah, and I would, like, get a beating once or twice, but.
From Andrew.
Yeah, from Andrew, but, like, without maintenance, yeah.
You got that right, you would get a couple of beatings.
Yeah, you would, you cute little fucking little smooth face bitch.
What about you?
I would choose, uh, choose you, Bobby.
Like, I don't know, get a little Korean barbecue and, uh.
Yeah.
Yes.
Yeah.
Fuck yes, dude.
You and I would go to the spa together at night.
You would definitely go, both of you guys would end up in the spa with Bobby.
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Of course, of course.
Maybe we could, like, double date or something.
Yes, we could.
You could double date, fuck yeah.
But I gotta tell you, Yoel, you better stay in line when we go out, all right?
You can double date, but I don't want you throwing eyes at Bobby.
You're with me, young man.
And we could do a four-man train.
Have you ever done a four-man train?
No, but I, uh, I'm open for it, I guess.
Yeah, I'm open for it, I guess.
And obviously, I'm the caboose, okay?
Yeah, Bob's gotta be in the back.
I gotta be in the back.
All right, well, listen.
Andrew, do you want to be in the front, or?
Uh, I'm gonna watch.
I want to watch you guys.
I like to sit in the corner in a chair.
He's the conductor.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Is Jules there?
Yeah, Jules is there.
Jules is there, Jules is there.
She's over there, she can hear you.
Just come in the screen and say hi.
They're from the Netherlands, come here.
Jules, it's coming to the fucking screen, Jules.
Come over here, come over here.
She's coming, she's coming, she's coming.
I'm really in love with you.
Oh my God, he's in love with you.
He's in love with you.
Go over there, go behind Bobby so we can see.
Yeah, let us out.
Come here, come, all right.
She can't hear 'cause the headphones are not on her, but.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
But there she is, and Jules, Jules, Jules, so he's 17 and 18, right?
17 and 18?
17 years old, look at him.
So which one of these two guys would you, Jules, Jules, which one of the guys
would
you go on a date with?
We're not being gross, nothing gross.
Who would you let take you out on a date?
Yoel is on the left and John is on the right.
The eyeglasses?
The eyeglasses guys.
The eyeglasses.
Who's that?
Woo!
That's John.
Oh, don't feel bad, buddy.
Get the fuck out of here, you picked the wrong guy.
Hey, wait a minute.
No, be nice.
Yoel, just know this.
Yeah.
I'll take you out to an amazing little dinner.
Let me tell you something.
Okay.
She doesn't have any money.
I got money.
I'll take you out to a nice place.
I valet the car.
I throw the keys at them.
I go, keep it running, baby.
Right?
Right out front.
You and me sitting down.
Whatever you want.
Appetizers, salads, soups, drinks, whatever you need.
Okay.
A big main course.
Then I make you get onto the table and start rubbing my feet while I finish my
meal.
Right?
Yeah.
The night's just beginning.
I get you back out in the car.
We take off.
We go to my palace in Malibu, overlooking the ocean.
Next morning, you're going to look like a fucking panda because you're going to
punch both
your eyes out.
I'm going to knock you out.
But I'm going to love you in the meantime.
You guys, you're the best.
We love you.
Thank you so much, you guys.
Honestly, we'll talk to you soon.
Bye, guys.
Love you guys.
Dude, the Netherlands are awesome.
And look at the young boys love Juliana.
Yeah.
And you know what's so funny?
You broke that guy's heart so much.
The guy who liked you, you picked the other one.
Yeah.
You broke his fucking heart, Juliana.
Shattered.
He might kill himself tonight.
Talking to the mic.
How do you...
You don't care.
Get close to the mic, Juliana.
Why did you like the glasses boy better?
What about him was more appealing?
He's cute.
He's cuter.
Get closer to the mic, Jules.
I am.
All right.
Get your mouth closer to the mic.
I turned up her level so loud because I knew she'd be 50 feet away.
Yeah.
He kind of looked like Vance Joy.
Yeah.
Yeah, he was cute.
He was cute.
What kind of guys do you like, Jules?
Right now, you like none of them.
You're not dating anybody who'd break their fucking legs.
You know what she said in the car ride over here?
Yeah.
Did you not say this?
Did we not talk about it?
What?
She likes good looking guys.
She doesn't care what race.
That's nice.
But they also have to be very funny.
Right.
She lives in a world of humor.
So obviously.
Yeah.
But here's the thing.
She then said, they don't even have to be that good looking, but funny is
important.
But let me say something.
Takes after her auntie.
No.
Growing up.
Right.
I would see chicks that would say, yeah, I just want a funny guy.
And then you would meet their boyfriends and they're the most unfunniest dudes
you've
ever met in your life.
Of course.
Yeah.
That's typical.
Yeah.
But she knows funny.
I think she does.
Yeah.
I know her.
I know the fuck out of her though.
Does Bobby annoy you?
No.
Yeah, I do.
I'll tell you what.
I know it.
Does, does, does, does Kalilah or Bobby annoy you more?
Who gets under your skin more?
To Bobby.
Bobby does.
Yeah.
I do.
Why?
I don't know.
He's just, he doesn't know how to clean after everything he does.
Yeah.
Yes.
Correct.
And he leaves like dirty plates everywhere.
Dirty plates.
Yeah.
But besides that stuff.
Yeah.
It's fine.
Great.
At like five in the morning.
I go, I'm going to take a bagel, an onion bagel.
Right.
And I'm just going to, you know, the onion part.
Yeah.
And I'm just going to, you know what I mean?
Why?
Make a fucking mess all over the fucking counter so that she could pick it up.
You know what I mean?
You do that?
Oh yeah.
But why?
And then I'll take cream cheese and I'll just put a little bit on the thing on
the table.
Cause she has to clean it.
Yeah.
It looks like fucking an IED went off.
Right?
And she wakes up in the morning and she looks at the kitchen.
Yeah.
There's like a pepperoni in the ceiling.
You know what I mean?
It's a fucking mess.
Yeah.
And I know when I'm laying in bed sleeping that she has to fucking clean it.
That's nice.
Do you know why?
Why?
Cause she doesn't, I don't charge you rent in the house.
Do I charge you rent in the house?
We're paying her now.
Yeah.
We're paying you for this.
Salary baby.
Big bucks.
You can pick a fucking pepperoni or two.
Okay?
Yeah.
Don't get angry.
I'm not.
She's not.
In fact, she's got a boyfriend if she ever goes to the Netherlands.
Yeah.
Let me tell you something by the way.
What?
Every time I've met someone from the Netherlands, they always have an extremely
keen sense of humor.
It's a part of their culture.
There's something about it that they get it.
And not only that, though, they're also, um, general, there's English is they're
better
than ours.
Better, not better, but it's very done.
Well, I mean, I'm sorry.
They speak eloquently, but they also get the humor.
Yeah, they do.
Oh, oh, oh, oh.