Name: President Bobby Lee Addresses The Nation | Bad Friends Clips
Uploaded: 2020-10-21T16:00:05.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'President Bobby Lee Addresses The Nation | Bad Friends Clips' from Bad Friends Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2020-10-21. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'President Bobby Lee Addresses The Nation | Bad Friends Clips' from Bad Friends Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2020-10-21. Transcript available.

We're bad friends!
Heary Heary.
Don't laugh.
You're my secretary.
Heary Heary to the people.
I, your president, have a national address for you.
Okay?
As we know, our Constitution creates a foundation
for in which we must react to global epidemics
and also national ones.
And something horrific occurred in New York City.
I also want to add that I, as president, to the people,
based on all the amendments, especially the second one,
and all of them, they're all important, by the way.
The amendments were created as a tool set
in which we can look down the line.
We have...
We have 50-plus amendments.
There are a lot.
There are a lot, alright?
Tell them what happened.
We will.
We'll get to that, because I have to fill...
I know that I have to fill 30 minutes, right?
Yeah, but they want to know what happened.
Tell them what happened, sir.
Sir.
I'm sorry, sorry.
People are dying.
Alright.
This is no laughing matter.
I apologize.
This is no laughing matter, right?
Mm-mm.
Mm-mm.
Mm-mm.
Yesterday.
Last night.
Last night.
Last night.
At two in the morning.
So, technically, today.
So, technically, technically today, right?
Although, some would assume that it happened yesterday.
Mm-hmm.
In the wee hours.
Yesterday.
At two in the morning.
In the subways of our great city of New York.
Mm-hmm.
Which is a part of the United States of America.
Yeah.
I'm sorry.
I don't know why.
Sorry.
What happened, sir?
A gig of terrorists.
ISIS, a.k.a. Al-Qaeda.
A.k.a. you know, from Turkey.
What?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Ahsan.
Okay.
Ahsan.
Okay.
Ahsan and his wife.
Okay.
Ahsan and his wife, right?
They dispatched their cronies, a.k.a. the ISIS, right?
To come into our country.
Yeah.
Ahsan.
Okay.
Ahsan and his wife.
Okay.
Ahsan and his wife, right?
They dispatched their cronies, a.k.a. the ISIS, right?
To come into our great city of New York, which happens to be in the United
States of America,
right?
Mm-hmm.
To terrorize us, right?
With their ideology that's based on scriptures that don't go against the Bible.
They do go against the Bible.
What?
They have a different ideology.
Mm-hmm.
Although, be it, we have freedom of religion in this country.
Yes.
So you may worship any god as you want.
So I am not judging one's religion or sect or dominatrix.
Dominatrix.
Dominatrix, right?
Mm-hmm.
But yesterday at 2:32 a.m.
Today.
Of today, right?
In the subways of our great city, you know, they attacked a bunch of elderly
people in
the subways.
Now, what, this elderly group of people were going to a volleyball game.
They were going to a volleyball tournament, right?
In Brooklyn.
Mm-hmm.
Right?
They were going from Queens to Brooklyn, right?
Mm-hmm.
They were, this elderly ball volleyball team, right?
They're called the hazmatics.
And they were fighting, you know what I mean?
The crutchers.
The crutchies.
The crutchies in the final senior citizen volleyball tournament.
Tournament.
Championship.
Right?
Championships in Brooklyn.
And they were waiting for the subway, right?
And as you know, at 2:30, 2:00 in the morning, the subwaves, they don't, they're
not as active as often.
Mm-hmm.
Right?
And they come in waves, the subwaves.
Mm-hmm.
And they come in the window between, you know what I mean?
Stop and go.
Between the two junctions, right?
Mm-hmm.
To the people.
Right?
Herey.
Right?
No, I'm not done.
Oh, shit.
I'm not done, yeah.
Okay, yeah.
A gang of Al-Qaeda, Ahsan terrorists, right?
They came in with their masks.
We had no idea what was going on.
We also have the best police force in the subways of New York, right?
Mm-hmm.
We patrol them, you know what I mean, at every hour, in every station, in every
point.
Yeah.
And we are salutes to them.
So we salute them.
All the seniors were raped.
They were raped.
They were bent over the benches down there in the subways in a line, right?
Yeah.
And these Al-Qaeda, ISIS people, right?
They bent each one of them over.
Mm-hmm.
They lube their dicks because, as you know, American citizens and senior
citizens, they have
dry war faces.
Mm-hmm.
Dry touch.
They were old, right?
Mm-hmm.
They were raped.
Mm-hmm.
Then murdered.
Then left to rot.
Oof.
This morning, at eight in the morning, is when they were found.
Oh, God.
Yeah.
So, heary, heary, heary.
God bless America.
We will get these perpetrators.
Mm-hmm.
And so long.
Honestly?
Yeah.
Pretty good.
I mean, as your Secretary of Defense?
Pretty good.
I'm impressed.
We'll be right back.