Name: BREAKING: Bobby Lee is Late & Andrew Sings Him A Song | Bad Friends Clips
Uploaded: 2020-11-05T17:00:00.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'BREAKING: Bobby Lee is Late & Andrew Sings Him A Song | Bad Friends Clips' from Bad Friends Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2020-11-05. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'BREAKING: Bobby Lee is Late & Andrew Sings Him A Song | Bad Friends Clips' from Bad Friends Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2020-11-05. Transcript available.

We're bad friends.
Bobby was late.
It's an update.
You're late every day.
It pisses me off.
And that's why I'm always mad.
You're so f***ing late.
Late to the show.
You're late every time we film.
You're late every time we film.
Bob, without fail.
Every single time?
Yeah, bro.
You're too early.
That's your problem.
So is being on time too early?
No, no, no.
What you do is you come here like 20 minutes before.
So it seems like longer.
What you do is you come 20 minutes before to set up the show
to make sure that everything is in order
so that when we shoot, we're ready.
I understand that, but it's all about perception and time.
It's all about, it's all about, right, Jules?
No, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't.
What do you mean it's all about perception and time?
It's how you perceive it and how you live your time.
Swing and a miss, and that one's way outside, Bobby.
No, no, no, I live in the moment.
Yeah, and the moment is the time we're supposed to shoot.
Live in that moment and be on it.
Right, but we're here now in the moment shooting.
Late, but other people have, we have stuff to do, you know?
What do you have to do?
I have to go to a thing this evening.
What thing?
Another COVID party?
I'm watching a, another COVID party.
I'm watching a premiere tonight.
Are you in it?
Mm-hmm.
What is it?
Davey plus two?
No, that season, the season is about to start,
and it's FXX.
Thank you very much.
Okay, sorry.
Let's not make fun of my show.
I'm not making fun of your show.
No, you are.
I'm just saying, what kind of fucking premiere are you going to?
The way you say it, the way you say Davey,
you're on Magnum P.I.
Is Magnum P.I. the cool show to be on?
I'm gallus.
You are gallus.
Yeah.
Good to see you, boop.
No.
No, no, no, no, no.
Because what you don't understand is,
Go ahead.
Is that I woke up, right, in a fury.
Why?
When I called you?
Because we have construction in the house.
Because of the floor.
Yeah.
So there's buzz saws going,
dogs barking, you know.
Crazy.
I can't find my keys.
And then all of a sudden, like,
I'm spilling drinks because I'm looking for,
and things are splashing all over the fucking place.
And, you know, there's tension.
Check it out.
Check it out.
Let me finish.
Yeah.
There's tension, right?
I run down.
You know what?
I go, baby, get me Starbucks.
She orders me Starbucks, right?
I run down.
I'm like, maybe I'll just,
maybe going in front of Jules downstairs, right?
Because she's in school, right?
It'll make me feel better.
So I go in there,
and she just gives me fucking judge eyes.
You know what I mean?
Judge eyes.
Like, Judge Ito eyes.
She's just like, everything I'm doing.
Like, I'm OJ.
Guilty.
Yeah, guilty, right?
And so then I'm playing Warzone,
and then, like, I can't get no kills.
I'm just, like, I'm just dying out there, man.
And then all of a sudden, like, you know,
then the Starbucks is late,
and we're supposed to go here.
And I go, should I get my coffee
and have my little sandwich,
or should I come malnourished to this podcast?
Should I come malnourished?
Check it out.
Yeah.
Check it out.
We called, I talked to you at 2.
2.30.
Okay, you had an hour and a half
to put food in your body.
Okay, but here...
And to get here on time...
I didn't tell the story.
But you wanted to wait to the...
I didn't tell the story, right?
You didn't?
I didn't tell the story, right?
So everything was just a lie,
what you just said?
No, no, there's one little thing
that I forgot to mention.
Is it an important detail?
Really huge.
And why'd you leave it out?
Because I just wanted to get
through the fucking story.
Oh, so the important things
you should take out.
Yeah.
Okay, so what's the one thing
that you didn't...
All right, so...
That Starbucks wasn't the first option.
When I came down there, right?
Right to your room.
Time out.
How long did you play Warzone for?
We were waiting for...
Let me just finish my point.
Okay.
So when I came down there,
what did I say was coming first initially?
The sandwich?
No.
Burrito.
Oh, burrito.
Did I say burrito?
Yeah.
Okay, thank you.
So I go,
we ordered burritos from Koufax.
Yeah, I love it.
Breakfast burritos.
It's great.
Great, right?
Yeah, great.
So then I started playing Warzone
and I'm texting Kalilah.
You can see the text.
Where is it?
We have to go, right?
And then she goes,
it's coming.
We're waiting.
And then all of a sudden she says,
they fucking canceled the order.
Because it was a breakfast burrito
and you ordered it at 2 p.m.?
I don't know.
That could be it.
I don't know what it is.
And you might have a point,
but that's irrelevant.
It's irrelevant, right?
Whatever the reasons why
they canceled it,
they canceled it.
Sure.
Right?
So I'm like,
now it's like,
we're supposed to be at 4.
Now it's like 3.45.
And I'm like,
I can't podcast without coffee
and I need to get some nutrients in my body
because I'm a human being
and that's what I fucking drive on.
Could have some food at the house.
Could.
No, because...
Could have some food around the house.
The construction is what?
They're blocking the fridge.
Yes.
So?
So I can't go up there
because...
And it has nothing to do
with their race or anything.
Oh, it does.
But they're talking about the Hispanics.
Oh, boy.
That's what it is.
You don't like to be around Mexicans.
No, that's...
Dude, I love them!
You get nervous around Mexicans.
I love them.
Cinco de Mayo,
I'm the one with the fucking spices, man.
You go upstairs
and they're like,
I bring the spices to the party.
Hola, senor!
And you're like...
No, I don't.
So I can't go up there
and it's like,
so we're late.
All right?
But there's a reason why.
All that other shit
you just talked about?
Was that not it?
Yeah, those are the reasons.
Those are the reasons.
Yeah, yeah.
So I think that in a court of law,
I would win.
Mm-mm.
Oh, yeah, oh, yeah.
No way.
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
There's no way.
In a court of law, I would win.
In a court of law, I would win.