Name: Andrew Santino and Bobby Lee Find Out The Truth About Woody Allen | Bad Friends Clips
Uploaded: 2021-03-26T20:16:08.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Andrew Santino and Bobby Lee Find Out The Truth About Woody Allen | Bad Friends Clips' from Bad Friends Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2021-03-26. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Andrew Santino and Bobby Lee Find Out The Truth About Woody Allen | Bad Friends Clips' from Bad Friends Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2021-03-26. Transcript available.

we're bad friends bro geez when i was hawaii i saw this i saw a couple of that
woody allen thing
well what oh the documentary do you watch it no the two movies i saw manhattan
and then he hall how were they really good yeah he's a great filmmaker people
don't realize he
you know he does slapstick well no he does yeah yeah yeah he does he does um
bananas and sleeper
were slapsticky i don't know it's sunyi is his dog he i have no i have no i
have no idea what you're
saying right now let's make it up oh you want to make it up yeah okay let's
make it up go ahead no
wait a minute in the documentary andres you saw it not yet so did you see the
documentary no i didn't
watch it yet i wanted to watch it uh neil brennan had the best joke he said it's
the worst woody allen
movie i've ever seen uh so he adopts this girl from where he doesn't adopt she's
already pre-adopt
what do you mean by mia farrow she's me already had you know so she already has
a little chingling
you know could you get chinglings from over there for like cheap yeah real
cheap yeah yeah so what
i mean she she got 50 50 of them she has a bunch discount you know what i mean
so she adopts this
girl she got in bulk she got chinglings in bulk she got costco chinglings yeah
yeah so they came over
right named them you know what i mean yeah you're moses you know what i mean moses
yeah there's one
with the with the thick the thick glasses his name is moses is moses okay i i'm
moses yeah you're moses
yeah but my real name ding ding you know what i mean no you're moses now and
then uh and then so
sunyi was already but she they up because they adopted sunyi she was the only
one that was adopted
later in life how old was she when they adopted i don't know like 13 17 how old
was she seven seven eight
okay he he raises her as a stepdaughter not really he came in and he's just
like you know at first
standoffish a bit you know what i mean what do you mean why are you laughing
why are you geeking he did
raise her right am i stupid did he raise her andres it's i don't want to say a
raise because he had his
own apartment he would come by all the time hey soon yeah no it's me woody in
the beginning because you
want me to film you no in the beginning she was like you know um they make her
a slave did they make
her a maid around the house let me try to um say these words appropriately so
that i don't get in
trouble well how could you get in trouble for you didn't do this no because i'm
because i need to i
have a i have a thought about it i'm trying to so when she she when she when he
first was dating mia
she was young right and she kind of looked but as she got older she she really
became taller and more
attractive and i think through time you're talking about sunyi became taller
and more attractive yeah
yeah i think through time you know after three or four years he came to
breakfast one day and she
you know she probably gave him pancakes or whatever and he looked up and looked
at her little you know
what i mean yeah yeah yeah anyway oh me you know i mean but how old was she
when when this started
when this relationship happened she was how old was she andres you know yeah i
think i think she was
legal barely barely legal 17 maybe at 17. so okay and then they became lovers
that's not but that's
not the crazy one what's the crazy one dylan dylan is the younger one who was
his adopt real adopted
one okay okay who was white okay you he adopted a white yeah okay dylan was
white and expensive babies
huh sorry it cost about half a million dollars or whatever the ching chings
from bulk 50 of them
38.75 14.95 yeah two payments yeah two people let you do two easy payments yeah
yeah yeah and um
and they just they come over and you know in a ship yeah yeah like you know and
when you get a european
one it comes in a plane right this one comes like nine months later in the ship
yeah the european one
comes a stork is actually carrying it yeah yeah yeah when you get the asian
ones it's like you have to
open up a bunch of packaging too you do and then and they're just like you know
they're freeze-dried
they're stuffed in and you put water on them they're freeze-dried at first you
put water on them and
then they yeah float in the but um so wait this dude he adopts we're in trouble
this is bad he adopts
the white one so he adopts the white one and then he goes and you know he she
so you know it always
happens where you know she catches him doing stuff right right so the one thing
that i think somebody
caught him doing was um having sex with his step no no no he was doing um
teaching her how to suck his
finger you know that little move i don't care if that's real or not yeah yeah
no it's real shut up
sort of god andres i don't know yeah yeah in the first i swear to god faro is a
little crazy too so
whoa don't do that right now excuse excuse me you know what this is i know what
that's because where
he comes from justifies they're pig-headed misogynistic bullheaded males isn't
that right
yeah where do where do women belong andres and the house oh right that's how he
feels yeah and the
ratings of that documentary in spain is zero zero yeah they watch two minutes
of it like oh yeah yeah
yeah yeah these girls they're all crazy yeah yeah you saw all the crazy girls
so he he he got caught
she was he's like teaching her to tongue the tip of his finger that's so gross
yeah so gross all right
and i'm like pretty gross and then he so mia's out of the house because they
have this house in
connecticut uh-huh he comes over right because it's like a weekend yeah and all
the kids are because
so many kids there's like 32 000 kids and they're so you know and they have
three babysitters so it's
like how do you keep track of all of them sure right and um so he goes to the
attic right you know this
right yeah he goes to the attic with um dylan and oh yeah is it yucky well i
don't know what yucky is
you know i think they're going to the attic what are they doing up there they're
not looking for
christmas decorations no the ouija board no he's squeezing her tight she's
squeezing me tight and he was
playing with my naughty nuns downstairs yeah and how old she's what 12. gross
so what's going to happen
to him now that this documentary is out nothing you got a five picture deal
yeah so yeah yeah universal's
like pick them up pick them up no i well i think you know because he used to
make a movie a year
it's what's interesting he hasn't done that for a long time yeah but what's
interesting about him is is
that um you know this that like for instance one of my favorite i mean if you
go to my house
you know the woody allen picture i have in my house do you have you seen that
one do you know
who woody allen is yeah scoot the mic yeah no how many we've been doing this
for 55 weeks
and the mic starts at the end of the day and she doesn't know wait you don't
know who woody allen
is no that's why i'm trying to look him up well we'll pull it we'll pull up
here on the screen you
can see he he was a filmmaker who made a bunch of very successful very famous
very well respected films
um there he is right there how does he look okay just bring up that picture
will you click on just that
photo and see how how do you feel about that guy uh right there how does that
guy make you feel jules
does he look like he would adopt an asian girl and then make her his bride yeah
yeah okay so i
have a woody allen old school um framed photo of woody allen in my house right
so when i was watching
the documentary i called kalilah and i go i screamed at her i go flip the flip
the
fucking yeah take it down no no don't take it down no just flip it over don't
take it down you know
what i mean yeah so i was like um i'm a huge woody allen fan sure you know i
love brad right
broadway danny rose i love um but i love his later ones like husbands and wives
crimes and misdemeanors
but the movie that i loved that i've seen with kalilah before is husbands and
wives yeah but what's
interesting about that movie is halfway during that movie right uh-huh um so
mia is like stopping by
wood she has keys to his his apartment and he's not home so he just she just
comes to stop by because
she was in the area and she sees naked photos of sunyi on his drawer like on
the top of a drawer but not
she's a hustler like yeah yeah yeah barf what barf okay and imagine so she's in
the middle of she's
the co-star of husbands and wives and she sees those photos she sees the photos
right she's like
this is going to be a good movie i can't say anything yeah this is you know
that's her daughter
right gross gross right how old was and the daughter was young so she calls she's
like
you know confronts him whatever and she goes i think you need a two week break
so they hold production
for two weeks but then they keep shooting so now if you watch husbands and
wives you know
that somewhere in there wow right she mia knows get out of town yeah yeah so i
think i want to watch
re-watch that movie it just throws it in a different context i want to know
yeah and we'll how about we
guess now how about let's watch him next week we'll try to guess what point
that she knew we think we
should already i can there's a there's a moment where she questioned because in
the in she leaves him
in the in the movie yes so there's a moment where she questions their
relationship and i hope the
thing that that's when well maybe he's just a good filmmaker and he did that
all for the sake of
the film maybe interesting he went he went method on it super math super super
yeah so he was like
oh what i do is um i'll get you know i'll i'll sooni you know she's what 17
yeah she's got a little
breasts yeah and i'll you know i'll i'll just film her you know take photos of
her vagina i'll leave them
all over my desk yeah and it'll just give up and then mia will discover them
and then then boom we
got a picture oscar yeah wow maybe it was maybe maybe so you've never heard of
this man before
will you bring a bring a picture of him and sooni up so we can all take a look
at there there she is
right there right yeah oh tough she kind of looks like you bob oh that's tough
man oh no oh no but she
does will you blow that up just stretch stretch out so we can see it bigger you
look like him
i do that's me and you that's me and you yeah bad friends 2032 if we if we keep
doing this podcast
that's you and me bad friends 2032 guy i didn't know he had a lazy eye i never
noticed that his left
eye is lazy he's like 90 000 years but he he's got one eye looking at the
camera and the other one
looking at sunye look at that he's like don't you go nowhere so you don't get
back don't you get back
on that ship yeah yeah don't you get back on and she's looking kind of at him
going i'm not gonna
get back on that shit yeah yeah so all this like in 92 and stuff all this stuff
comes out right yeah
i remember when it first kind of came out right and he still after that did
movies with scarlett johansson
and you know he did blue jasmine with kate blanchett yeah and he just kept
going yeah yeah i think that
now it's like um the culture has completely changed totally because look at
look at a movie like manhattan
and also husband husbands and wives right he has in manhattan guess who his
girlfriend is
she's in the movie she's 17 years old yeah she's under yeah she's a young girl
and he's 45 or whatever
right right right in fucking um husbands and wives he's married to mia pharaoh
but he's a teacher
and he has an affair with a 16 year old student student they make out at her
birthday party or
whatever right right there's all these themes in his movies signs you would say
one would say yeah
little crumbles yeah yeah breadcrumbs but you know when you were watching it
back in the day you didn't
think that why because now i look at it culture that's crazy i think it's
culture but when i saw
manhattan i was like masterpiece well yeah i mean well yeah beautiful right
right the way it was shot but
it's also like the history of america too right you think about how these guys
like you talk to like my
grandparents on how they're how people in their generation met they're like he
was 30 and going off
to war i was nine

Andrew Santino and Bobby Lee Find Out The Truth About Woody Allen | Bad Friends Clips

we're bad friends bro geez when i was hawaii i saw this i saw a couple of that
woody allen thing
well what oh the documentary do you watch it no the two movies i saw manhattan
and then he hall how were they really good yeah he's a great filmmaker people
don't realize he
you know he does slapstick well no he does yeah yeah yeah he does he does um
bananas and sleeper
were slapsticky i don't know it's sunyi is his dog he i have no i have no i
have no idea what you're
saying right now let's make it up oh you want to make it up yeah okay let's
make it up go ahead no
wait a minute in the documentary andres you saw it not yet so did you see the
documentary no i didn't
watch it yet i wanted to watch it uh neil brennan had the best joke he said it's
the worst woody allen
movie i've ever seen uh so he adopts this girl from where he doesn't adopt she's
already pre-adopt
what do you mean by mia farrow she's me already had you know so she already has
a little chingling
you know could you get chinglings from over there for like cheap yeah real
cheap yeah yeah so what
i mean she she got 50 50 of them she has a bunch discount you know what i mean
so she adopts this
girl she got in bulk she got chinglings in bulk she got costco chinglings yeah
yeah so they came over
right named them you know what i mean yeah you're moses you know what i mean moses
yeah there's one
with the with the thick the thick glasses his name is moses is moses okay i i'm
moses yeah you're moses
yeah but my real name ding ding you know what i mean no you're moses now and
then uh and then so
sunyi was already but she they up because they adopted sunyi she was the only
one that was adopted
later in life how old was she when they adopted i don't know like 13 17 how old
was she seven seven eight
okay he he raises her as a stepdaughter not really he came in and he's just
like you know at first
standoffish a bit you know what i mean what do you mean why are you laughing
why are you geeking he did
raise her right am i stupid did he raise her andres it's i don't want to say a
raise because he had his
own apartment he would come by all the time hey soon yeah no it's me woody in
the beginning because you
want me to film you no in the beginning she was like you know um they make her
a slave did they make
her a maid around the house let me try to um say these words appropriately so
that i don't get in
trouble well how could you get in trouble for you didn't do this no because i'm
because i need to i
have a i have a thought about it i'm trying to so when she she when she when he
first was dating mia
she was young right and she kind of looked but as she got older she she really
became taller and more
attractive and i think through time you're talking about sunyi became taller
and more attractive yeah
yeah i think through time you know after three or four years he came to
breakfast one day and she
you know she probably gave him pancakes or whatever and he looked up and looked
at her little you know
what i mean yeah yeah yeah anyway oh me you know i mean but how old was she
when when this started
when this relationship happened she was how old was she andres you know yeah i
think i think she was
legal barely barely legal 17 maybe at 17. so okay and then they became lovers
that's not but that's
not the crazy one what's the crazy one dylan dylan is the younger one who was
his adopt real adopted
one okay okay who was white okay you he adopted a white yeah okay dylan was
white and expensive babies
huh sorry it cost about half a million dollars or whatever the ching chings
from bulk 50 of them
38.75 14.95 yeah two payments yeah two people let you do two easy payments yeah
yeah yeah and um
and they just they come over and you know in a ship yeah yeah like you know and
when you get a european
one it comes in a plane right this one comes like nine months later in the ship
yeah the european one
comes a stork is actually carrying it yeah yeah yeah when you get the asian
ones it's like you have to
open up a bunch of packaging too you do and then and they're just like you know
they're freeze-dried
they're stuffed in and you put water on them they're freeze-dried at first you
put water on them and
then they yeah float in the but um so wait this dude he adopts we're in trouble
this is bad he adopts
the white one so he adopts the white one and then he goes and you know he she
so you know it always
happens where you know she catches him doing stuff right right so the one thing
that i think somebody
caught him doing was um having sex with his step no no no he was doing um
teaching her how to suck his
finger you know that little move i don't care if that's real or not yeah yeah
no it's real shut up
sort of god andres i don't know yeah yeah in the first i swear to god faro is a
little crazy too so
whoa don't do that right now excuse excuse me you know what this is i know what
that's because where
he comes from justifies they're pig-headed misogynistic bullheaded males isn't
that right
yeah where do where do women belong andres and the house oh right that's how he
feels yeah and the
ratings of that documentary in spain is zero zero yeah they watch two minutes
of it like oh yeah yeah
yeah yeah these girls they're all crazy yeah yeah you saw all the crazy girls
so he he he got caught
she was he's like teaching her to tongue the tip of his finger that's so gross
yeah so gross all right
and i'm like pretty gross and then he so mia's out of the house because they
have this house in
connecticut uh-huh he comes over right because it's like a weekend yeah and all
the kids are because
so many kids there's like 32 000 kids and they're so you know and they have
three babysitters so it's
like how do you keep track of all of them sure right and um so he goes to the
attic right you know this
right yeah he goes to the attic with um dylan and oh yeah is it yucky well i
don't know what yucky is
you know i think they're going to the attic what are they doing up there they're
not looking for
christmas decorations no the ouija board no he's squeezing her tight she's
squeezing me tight and he was
playing with my naughty nuns downstairs yeah and how old she's what 12. gross
so what's going to happen
to him now that this documentary is out nothing you got a five picture deal
yeah so yeah yeah universal's
like pick them up pick them up no i well i think you know because he used to
make a movie a year
it's what's interesting he hasn't done that for a long time yeah but what's
interesting about him is is
that um you know this that like for instance one of my favorite i mean if you
go to my house
you know the woody allen picture i have in my house do you have you seen that
one do you know
who woody allen is yeah scoot the mic yeah no how many we've been doing this
for 55 weeks
and the mic starts at the end of the day and she doesn't know wait you don't
know who woody allen
is no that's why i'm trying to look him up well we'll pull it we'll pull up
here on the screen you
can see he he was a filmmaker who made a bunch of very successful very famous
very well respected films
um there he is right there how does he look okay just bring up that picture
will you click on just that
photo and see how how do you feel about that guy uh right there how does that
guy make you feel jules
does he look like he would adopt an asian girl and then make her his bride yeah
yeah okay so i
have a woody allen old school um framed photo of woody allen in my house right
so when i was watching
the documentary i called kalilah and i go i screamed at her i go flip the flip
the
fucking yeah take it down no no don't take it down no just flip it over don't
take it down you know
what i mean yeah so i was like um i'm a huge woody allen fan sure you know i
love brad right
broadway danny rose i love um but i love his later ones like husbands and wives
crimes and misdemeanors
but the movie that i loved that i've seen with kalilah before is husbands and
wives yeah but what's
interesting about that movie is halfway during that movie right uh-huh um so
mia is like stopping by
wood she has keys to his his apartment and he's not home so he just she just
comes to stop by because
she was in the area and she sees naked photos of sunyi on his drawer like on
the top of a drawer but not
she's a hustler like yeah yeah yeah barf what barf okay and imagine so she's in
the middle of she's
the co-star of husbands and wives and she sees those photos she sees the photos
right she's like
this is going to be a good movie i can't say anything yeah this is you know
that's her daughter
right gross gross right how old was and the daughter was young so she calls she's
like
you know confronts him whatever and she goes i think you need a two week break
so they hold production
for two weeks but then they keep shooting so now if you watch husbands and
wives you know
that somewhere in there wow right she mia knows get out of town yeah yeah so i
think i want to watch
re-watch that movie it just throws it in a different context i want to know
yeah and we'll how about we
guess now how about let's watch him next week we'll try to guess what point
that she knew we think we
should already i can there's a there's a moment where she questioned because in
the in she leaves him
in the in the movie yes so there's a moment where she questions their
relationship and i hope the
thing that that's when well maybe he's just a good filmmaker and he did that
all for the sake of
the film maybe interesting he went he went method on it super math super super
yeah so he was like
oh what i do is um i'll get you know i'll i'll sooni you know she's what 17
yeah she's got a little
breasts yeah and i'll you know i'll i'll just film her you know take photos of
her vagina i'll leave them
all over my desk yeah and it'll just give up and then mia will discover them
and then then boom we
got a picture oscar yeah wow maybe it was maybe maybe so you've never heard of
this man before
will you bring a bring a picture of him and sooni up so we can all take a look
at there there she is
right there right yeah oh tough she kind of looks like you bob oh that's tough
man oh no oh no but she
does will you blow that up just stretch stretch out so we can see it bigger you
look like him
i do that's me and you that's me and you yeah bad friends 2032 if we if we keep
doing this podcast
that's you and me bad friends 2032 guy i didn't know he had a lazy eye i never
noticed that his left
eye is lazy he's like 90 000 years but he he's got one eye looking at the
camera and the other one
looking at sunye look at that he's like don't you go nowhere so you don't get
back don't you get back
on that ship yeah yeah don't you get back on and she's looking kind of at him
going i'm not gonna
get back on that shit yeah yeah so all this like in 92 and stuff all this stuff
comes out right yeah
i remember when it first kind of came out right and he still after that did
movies with scarlett johansson
and you know he did blue jasmine with kate blanchett yeah and he just kept
going yeah yeah i think that
now it's like um the culture has completely changed totally because look at
look at a movie like manhattan
and also husband husbands and wives right he has in manhattan guess who his
girlfriend is
she's in the movie she's 17 years old yeah she's under yeah she's a young girl
and he's 45 or whatever
right right right in fucking um husbands and wives he's married to mia pharaoh
but he's a teacher
and he has an affair with a 16 year old student student they make out at her
birthday party or
whatever right right there's all these themes in his movies signs you would say
one would say yeah
little crumbles yeah yeah breadcrumbs but you know when you were watching it
back in the day you didn't
think that why because now i look at it culture that's crazy i think it's
culture but when i saw
manhattan i was like masterpiece well yeah i mean well yeah beautiful right
right the way it was shot but
it's also like the history