Name: The Scissor Bros Start A War With Bad Friends| Bad Friends Clips w/ Andrew Santino and Bobby Lee
Uploaded: 2021-11-19T03:45:00.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'The Scissor Bros Start A War With Bad Friends| Bad Friends Clips w/ Andrew Santino and Bobby Lee' from Bad Friends Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2021-11-19. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'The Scissor Bros Start A War With Bad Friends| Bad Friends Clips w/ Andrew Santino and Bobby Lee' from Bad Friends Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2021-11-19. Transcript available.

Say something to me.
Oh, no.
Well, that's easier.
Let me move over.
Tito Bobby.
I love you.
I love you.
But she betrayed you last night.
Wait, what happened?
Last night, she cheated on both of you.
Wait, what did you do?
What do you mean?
She did.
Do you not know that?
What the fuck are you talking?
You don't know what she did last night?
What did you do last night?
She cheated on us.
What does that even mean?
I don't understand what you're saying.
She did Jeremiah Wadkins' podcast.
Oh, shit.
Oh, shit.
What?
I went to Scissor Bros.
But not only me.
Andres went, too.
What the fuck?
You went to fucking Scissor Bros, fancy?
I was just making sure Rudy wasn't jumping shit.
Dude, Spanish people are so-
Oh, weasels.
Weasels.
Yeah.
He was on the show.
And here he is.
Ayos, making sure Rudy was okay.
Dude, you're a liar.
He's a liar.
Was he on cam-
Rudy won't lie.
Was he on camera?
And he was on the mic.
You piece of fucking shit.
That is so fucking gross to me.
That's disgusting, dude.
When a producer tries to fucking chisel his way into fucking screen time, it
makes me sick
to my fucking stomach.
You know what?
He's leaving the camera in the edit.
He's going to leave it on him this whole time that we've been saying this.
Have you noticed, though?
Because I've been watching the video.
He gives himself so much air time.
So much screen time.
Yeah, it'll just be him going like this.
Right.
The whole time.
And did you see him in fucking Mexico?
Oh, bro.
You would think that fucking, like, you know, Brad Pitt was there.
Yeah.
He was, hey, everybody.
Hey, everybody.
I know.
Hey, who want to take a picture?
He would ask.
Yeah, yeah.
Who want to take pictures?
He would ask.
Form a line.
Form a line, please.
Form a line.
Form a line.
And then George was like, you know what?
This is a good clue, right?
George would say stuff like, I just let him have it.
Yeah.
Like, he's kind of, like, broken, you know what I mean?
Like, let it go.
He knows who won.
Correct.
Right?
But he's, ah, it's fine.
He's not fine.
You could see his face.
You could tell George was so bothered by it.
It's killing him.
Hey, Andres.
Eres mi compa.
Mi compadre.
Ooh.
You know what he said, fans?
Yeah.
What'd he say?
You're my friend, my colleague, my brother in arms.
You know what I'm saying?
No.
You didn't know I speak a little bit of aspanol, huh?
Do you think this little one, this guy right here, we could do an offshoot
podcast?
Of him and who?
Somebody else.
Maybe these two or somebody, you know what I mean?
Maybe we can do an offshoot.
I'm more annoyed that we got stepped on by it.
You guys went to Scissor Bros.
Were you there the whole episode?
Yeah.
Wow.
How'd it go?
It was fun.
What?
Not fun like this.
She doesn't have fun here.
So, by her saying, I had fun there, she doesn't have fun here.
Right.
Right?
I just said it was fun.
She's saying, I prefer that.
No.
Okay.
That's what she's saying.
Well, then, let's call it, let's call a spade a spade.
Sorry.
What does that mean?
Sorry, Doc.
Sorry, Doc.
Nothing's taken.
I don't know what the fuck.
Let's call a spade a spade.
Keep that in.
You can go to Scissor Bros. if you want to be released.
Do you want to be released?
Maybe.
They're more sweet.
Wow.
Wow.
What's true?
Fuck.
You can be aggressive.
That's insane.
You can be aggressive.
You can be aggressive.
And I'm going to admit that.
I'm going to admit it as well.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
But I got to call these scumbags right now.
All right.
This is pissed me.
This pissed me right off, bud.
Pissed me right off.
This scumbag.
Stealing you guys?
And fancy?
I said some nice shit to you this weekend.
You're on my fucking...
How do you say poop in Spanish?
Caca?
Caca.
You're on my caca list.
Caca.
Fucking...
He's probably taking care of his babies.
Merda.
Merda.
Merda is shit.
Merda.
That's what they say.
Jeremiah Watkins, you reached me on my cell phone.
Leave me a message and I'll get back to you as I can.
Lay in the wound.
Hey, man.
It's Santino.
I saw what you did.
I saw what you did stealing Rudy and Fancy B.
And I got to tell you something, bud.
If you care about your family, you better watch your fucking back, buddy.
You better watch your skinny little fucking white piece of shit back, my friend.
Because what you did was fucking war.
War.
And you want to fuck with the fucking armada, bro?
You want to fuck with the armada, bitch?
You don't have enough weapons in your arsenal.
It's fucking over, bud.
It's over.
All right.
Let's see how that's received.
Show Bobby the picture that you just sent me.
What is it?
Unbelievable.
Holy shit.
Wait, wait, wait.
Zoom in.
Zoom into that.
What the fuck is that?
Okay.
That's my brother.
That's my brother.
And that's you.
And it's pretty close.
It's pretty close.
Yeah, it's pretty close.
And they try to.
They try to.
You actually look like a hot Korean girl.
Like those tits.
He's got nice tits on.
Wait, wait.
Does he have a fat suit on?
I think it just looks like tits.
He's like holding up his tits.
Right?
Am I wrong?
He made a fat suit.
Yep.
That's not a fat suit.
That's tits.
And his hair is beautiful.
That's like someone's extensions that he knows.
You know, it's funny how they just steal.
Steal.
They just.
They're thieves.
Look up.
Can you send them an article about plagiarism?
Yeah.
The definition maybe.
Yeah.
It's illegal.
It's illegal what they're doing.
This is illegal.
This is nuts.
This is crazy.
They stole our fonts.
Remember they stole.
Yes, dude.
They stole everything.
Yeah.
Is this more photos?
And he's my brother.
And so I'm just letting it go.
Oh, shit.
You're letting it go.
So he looks like Tino.
And then he looks like you.
That's what's going on here?
Yeah.
Fuck.
Did you see that, Jules?
I know.
Fucking.
Fucking crazy.
It's just so behind the eight ball.
And look at that.
You know who that is?
It's just looking at the picture, though.
Do you know who that is?
That's Doc.
That's supposed to be Doc.
That's supposed to be Doc.
That's supposed to be Doc.
That's you.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
The brown cloak.
The brown cloak.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah.
What's going on there, Jules?
Are you okay?
Are you cold?
Are you Mayan?
What the fuck is going on here?
Oh, there's a clip.
Oh, start the clip over.
Hold on.
Start over, please.
Let's hear it.
Oh, there we go.
Oh, they'd be holding you captive?
Go ahead.
Yeah.
On my birthday, and they won't let me go until everybody from Bad Friends
subscribes.
Okay.
Well, Steve's into it.
Whenever you're ready, look right into that camera over there.
God, this piece of shit.
The Scissor Bros have captured me, and they won't let me go unless everyone
from Bad Friends fans will subscribe to their show, but they seem sweet, unlike
Tito Bobby and Tito Andrew, so maybe you should do it.
Give me back the fucking Barbie.
Give me back the fucking ocean.
Why?
You provide those lines.
And you know what?
And I want the fucking waffle maker back now.
No, no.
Keep the waffle maker.
Well, you can keep it.
I want to eat.
Yeah, you can have it.
Yeah, yeah.
I'll take the waffle maker, but it's yours.
Happy birthday.
So that's my present to you.
That worked very well.
Give him the Barbie.
Give him the Barbie.
Well, it's my gift.
Yeah.
What was that?
What was that?
Yeah.
You kowtowed to the fucking arch nemesis of ours.
The enemies.
And she improvives most of the lines.
She was coached a little bit, but she added scenes about you guys.
She improvises too there?
Yeah.
Right.
Okay.
I'm actually livid right now.
I know you are.
Calm down, dude.
Breathe.
Yeah, I know.
I know, dude.
Papa gets upset.
I know.
But buddy, buddy.
Huh?
Look at me right now, dude.
Right?
Not everyone is a good person like you.
That's right.
And obviously-
A lot of young people from a different country.
Yep.
Right?
They have a different ethics and a different code of doing things.
Yeah.
You know, back in some countries, you know, if an old lady's crossing the
street, you know
what I mean?
And she's struggling to get there.
In some countries, they just push them on the middle of the road.
Yeah, yeah.
You know?
Whereas you, you help them.
I help them.
Yeah.
I help them up.
And then you go, you want to see my baseball game?
You know how white people love to-
Yeah.
I said, you want to go to the park?
Yeah, the park.
Yeah.
I have a tuna fish sandwich.
You want to go to the park?
Right, right, right.
But you, you push them down.
You push them down.