Name: Bad Friends Freaky Meditation! | Bad Friends Clips
Uploaded: 2022-10-02T17:00:01.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Bad Friends Freaky Meditation! | Bad Friends Clips' from Bad Friends Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2022-10-02. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Bad Friends Freaky Meditation! | Bad Friends Clips' from Bad Friends Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2022-10-02. Transcript available.

i wanted to start off with a happiness exercise go ahead i want you to see this
girl will you
show him that girl please why are we starting it now wait you i want you to
because i want us i
want us to get into this this we need to humble our mood because we're getting
too fast okay hot
and heavy oh we're too fast i found this girl on tiktok last night yeah and i
watched all her
videos maybe maybe 10 times okay okay watch this can you full screen that watch
this beautiful girl
she gives you these breathing and sound exercises i want to try one
what is it she's dead serious it's what is it it's a language it's a new
language
play any of the other ones she has you do one what does it say up top what does
this one say
soul heart opening right so if you want to open your soul heart yeah
you just sound scottish well that's what she's doing no she's not you sound
like
william wallace then you do it that's what he did when he was fighting then you
do it all right
that's the asian sound opening you sounded asian even when you try not yeah
yeah let me ask you
something speaking to the universe if you were hooking with a girl and she was
doing that would
you stop i'd come in seconds you would if she started going i wouldn't i'd be
done in a second
really how could you stop i would be so my dick would just soften in her vagina
wait would you go
back would you be in character would you and then when i pulled out it would be
like a gum piece of gum
you're like yeah i like i would be so soft would you would you would you play
along though a little
bit if she started going would you just go maybe it would be hot as you turn
into a
bird that's role play dude it would be so annoying let me give me the other
there's one more i think
where it says like happiness exercise or something like that there's one that
what is that
she's so annoyed dude
i love this it does feel good though see oh so it did work it does work all
right let
it feels so i feel do it you do it
see it does work i feel so much better clean yeah shout out to this chick what
is her profile name on
there um soul heart opening do you feel like your soul and your heart is
opening up a little bit a
little bit because i got to tell you you've been happier than you've ever been
lately i've seen you
smile a lot more yeah you danced in your room naked this morning didn't you
over the city of new york
you told me you opened the blinds and you just whirled around the room no
because i just like being
here i know what i'm saying you say you you love waking up in the morning in a
new city and you were
in the window naked dancing around because you know we you know we were in the
pandemic for so long
and you didn't get to go to hotels i didn't get to do any of it and it's just
like
you know i just feel a little freer that's nice to go well i think it's also
not being at home
sometimes because you wake up at home it's the same exercise that you always
you get up you take
a you do this you do that you make coffee you have the same pattern at least
when you wake up in a
new city there's no timeline have you ever had jock itch what have you ever had
jock itch jock itch
yeah are you having it i had a couple weeks ago i think it's gone now how did
you get a jock you're
not a jock how would you get that i know i never did anything i don't do enough
well you know you
just shaved your pubes that maybe it's is that what it is yeah no but it's not
even on the pew part
it was off the side on your thigh yeah well because your time between the sack
and the sack and the
thigh but your thighs rub together yeah yeah yeah well that's why have you but
does that ever happen
to you no i'm in shape you need to do you need to just get some baby powder and
put it on the
inside of your little little tiny asian thighs can we get some afterwards 100
okay we'll go to duane
reed but baby baby baby powder baby baby how much does that cost like seven or
eight hundred dollars
for just like a little six ounce how much does it cost it's like ten bucks oh
ten bucks okay yeah
you're scared now about money you i just watched you order a whole lunch that
you didn't even eat i
don't know because i don't like buying things that i'm not only going to use
once that's exactly what
you do i know that's like your whole life i'm trying to change my way how many
vape pens do you have
with you on vacation now or on on the trip omni right now yeah let's go through
not a lot let's
go through i got one what's that one called this is uh elf bar tropical rainbow
blast elf bar i have
this one flume flume ice berry lemon oh i have this one ice cola by fog xbox
okay oh xbox does that
now yeah yeah 60 or i got another one it's this is
cola another cold freeze i got this one vietnamese coffee vietnamese coffee
that one's good
i have this one it's called um tobacco just a couple i guess that's it we went
shopping and bought and
bob show everybody your bag that we bought yesterday from fall what's how do
you say fall is it fall raven
yeah fall raven i think they're swedish yeah i got it yeah i really like this
these bags fall raven
fall raven and we walked in there and uh the guy says to bobby okay okay come
on it's funny don't
hurt me bobby goes i just want a bag i know exactly what i want i want like a
strap and the girl says
i use this one they're so dope and so bobby sees it and goes that is dope can i
have the yellow one
yeah she pulls it down and we go up to the front and there's a dude there was a
joke that you said
what did i say when the egg picked the yellow one no you first picked the
orange when i picked the
yellow one you go oh it matches the skin your skin your skin and then she goes
oh wow oh that's
uncomfortable she goes you can say that i can't say yeah yeah something like
that i said well it'll
blend right in you won't even know that you're wearing it yeah yeah and the guy
at the front desk
goes he goes oh man bobby lee and i go yes it is and the guy goes man i used to
watch you on tv how
come you're not on tv no more and i said he is on tv still he's on a couple of
tv shows and he goes
nah man i ain't seen you on tv no more it was awesome why do you like that
because it was funny
because his friend in the back was laughing dying laughing dying laughing
because they don't know
that it's mean he doesn't mean it mean right right he's not it's not mean i was
fine no no it but it
stays with you yeah it does stay with you but it's fine it's fine i mean he
yeah people do it all the
time look when people say to me something like uh oh you're in that show and i'll
go yeah and they go
i don't really like that show but you're funny but i don't like that show how
does that hurt you're
good in it yeah but it's better than it's better than what have you been doing
for 20 years but
basically it's the same thing it's like saying like i don't like that thing but
i think you're okay
all right but it's like well don't i don't need to know that yeah you don't
need to tell me you
don't like it if you don't like it that's okay but i don't need to know that
you don't like it
that's weird as yeah it's like every time i walk past a restaurant and if out
loud i went i don't
like al chaval and just said it to the guy at the front yeah and he's like oh
okay yeah i don't like
it but okay bye i remember when i did the movie the dictator