Name: Dolphins and The Other Things We Hate | Bad Friends Clips
Uploaded: 2023-05-02T07:00:08.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Dolphins and The Other Things We Hate | Bad Friends Clips' from Bad Friends Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2023-05-02. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Dolphins and The Other Things We Hate | Bad Friends Clips' from Bad Friends Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2023-05-02. Transcript available.

i i don't like when people show their beliefs so outwardly all right let's hate
let's start
a hate group against people that show their beliefs outwardly what what kind of
hate group
could we we three start for real let's start a hate group of our own what do we
hate collectively
like an animal what animal do you hate let's choose an animal that people love
and we hate
it yes okay well what what what do people love that we dolphins dude then i'm
not kidding yeah
hate them hate them hate them yeah cut it out what's that mean cut it out stop
geeky yeah and we get it
yeah you don't need a parade i was petting this dolphin one time in mexico and
he like popped his
head up you know and and literally like like that you know you're they put him
on the thing and
yeah i'm rubbing him softly and he pops his head up and he goes you show me
where the poppers are
it was so crazy crossing the line man it was i was like i'm not gonna give a
dolphin drugs yeah nuts
dude because do you ever see the documentary the cove yeah we talked about it i
love it but you know
we should go against dolphins is there a dolphins group because we want to
start because you don't
like dolphins either do you juice no i hate them fucking hate them dude i don't
want to see any
dolphins that are yeah yeah you know what the worst thing too is if you meet a
girl and they have a
dolphin tattoo it's a red flag red flag red flag red flag that and like a um clover
leaf you know how
you guys do it what are you talking about a four leaf clover yeah what's wrong
with those a tattoo of
it uh it doesn't scare me as much as dolphins but there's not a what if if a
woman had a tattoo what
kind of tattoo would turn you off what kind of tattoo would turn me off well i'm
not i'm not huge into
face tattoos because i don't know if that's a good i like your face right i don't
know if i want to see
tons down but prove me wrong maybe i maybe i will later in life meet someone we
met that girl that had a
bad friend's tattoo on her leg yeah but that's rad that's amazing but it's not
her leg that's not in
her face yeah but she also colored jersey and mine's completely empty with no
color that's right why
because yellow was expensive orange is like the cheapest color oh i see i see i
see i see
no uh what tattoo would turn me off for real yeah actually that's not you know
i take it back i go
back because there i have seen some face tattoos that are like neck that bleed
up that are sexy as
shit yeah i just don't like like a word on your face oh i don't like that like
the word like i've
seen those people it's like uh what someone has an eyebrow who's famous someone
has like above their
eyebrow it says something and it's like yeah undisputed or something i'm like
why on your face yeah a
word yeah art would be tight you know like like you know when like uh
indigenous people or natives have
face tattoos that but it's but it's symbolic that looks sexy and cool yeah that
looks cool i just don't
want a word on my face like that yeah what does it say always tired what does
post malone say yeah always
tired yeah i don't i why why though it's a very silly choice and god bless so
much confidence too
see the cross makes sense i don't mind the crowd the word is always tired is a
it's a big what does
that say oh that's his address 673 east apple drive that's not bad one on the
above like below an
eye and one on the forehead that's not bad you know imagine this guy cannot
walk into a pc store
wow because i'll get out like imagine if he finally wants to switch to an
android
and they're like i'm sorry man not with that fucking bullshit yeah but it's so
funny when
we were younger and you met any hot chick they could have anything on their
body the most offensive
thing and you still try to smash well right well also because when we were
younger times were like
tattoos were a little bit more it was a little bit rare and the idea that like
people these days
everybody has tattoos and they have them all over right when we were kids not a
lot of people had
this many tattoos oh oh my god and when you saw people with a bunch you were
like whoa that's so
fucking rad they were like the rebels of the time now it's like no you'll be
scared well they were yeah
like in the early 80s if i was walking in the street and some guy had any
tattoo i'm like oh my god
fight yeah he'll fight you no no it's like yeah this is um escape from new york
right right i'm snake
plissken you are snake yeah love that movie do you have tattoos i forget you
told me no i don't have
any we're gonna get one on the road that's right we have to get the bad friends
tattoo because you're
a hundred thousand followers i was thinking of getting like a cartoon juice box
right on my neck
and the straw goes out to my mouth cool good idea pretty good yeah that's a
very good idea you're
gonna love that acting yeah all right yeah you're gonna love that forever i
want to make sure
you guys supported it before can i tell you the funniest version of that that
you could actually
get that no one will see have a juice box on your butt cheek and make the straw
go into your ass
and no one will ever see that that's so funny that's so funny that's so good
but you also
what do you mean no one will ever see it well no one will ever see it unless
you want them
to see it i mean i'm saying like no one's gonna know you have that unless you
show them you know
what i'm gonna get then you have to paint the inside of your butthole like
grape juice though
you have to do like you have to you have to stain your butthole already is like
have you thought about
getting a tattoo i've thought about it a thousand times i have one i'm gonna do
what on the road let's
do it i'm gonna get a tattoo of a penis on my penis of a bigger penis so dumb
what what if you do
black dick what if you do black face black cock oh that's true what if you just
did a black
dick and and it changed the way you felt about yourself and you had a bigger
dick immediately
i mean it would swell up for sure or you could even lie go this is gary coleman's
penis
yeah this is this is webster's penis all right let's get a tattoo on the road
then
but you will you'll get one yeah but on the ankle or something no an ankle what
am i a teenage boy
and the ankle i mean it's like no i would get it some i'd probably get you're
not gonna want it
because it's a nightmare when you act you act a lot you have to go in an hour
early it's a
nightmare well you just get it on your wrist that's what i want to do one on my
right i think on my
wrist no one no one will see right here much because your hands are like oh
that's true okay
and then makeup cover this up will take three seconds yeah that's true so what
would i get
what would you get it's your body i just want to write i want to i want like
one polarizing word
oh shit you know so many except one polar right you know i know which one we'll
say it on the
count three one well don't do this yeah jesus all right one two three freedom i
knew you were
going to betray me i knew you bailed what i knew you were going to betray that's
why i said freedom