Name: Santino's Butt Issue | Bad Friends Clips
Uploaded: 2023-05-27T07:00:03.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Santino's Butt Issue | Bad Friends Clips' from Bad Friends Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2023-05-27. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Santino's Butt Issue | Bad Friends Clips' from Bad Friends Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2023-05-27. Transcript available.

what is wrong with you're smiling i like it yeah yeah when did you get high
about 20 minutes ago why i was coming here i i know but you never have done
that you've
not out of i'm not high i'm not high oh you're not no oh look oh my god i think
he's lying
i think you're lying i swear yeah what's wrong with you that there's like there's
a namaste
about you yeah dude i'm trying to zen you're like peaceful i'm trying to
fucking zen oh you're
in doubt right i told him you didn't want to do this show and he said well i'll
i'll do some
edibles before coming yeah he told me you didn't want to do the show today no
he said that i didn't
i'm just so tired same yeah an hour and then i i have them packed same i'm
doing laundry same
okay yeah and i just asked still showed up with the show and i'm here too as
well did a pod before
this i'm here i did two yesterday i know you did you called me from with megan
trainer yeah yeah
she's the best oh wow what that's cool yeah it's okay it's it's fine she
literally is her i love her
old family they're the best they are actually her old family is wonderful i had
we had dinner with
them she had dinner with my parents she told me in australia is that your brand
juice yes that's the
movie so let's shake it up ready hold on let me just i'm sorry i gotta walk
into it you show your
butthole no no not right now ten thousand dollars you look like a race car
driver yeah like in the
best way possible you look like you race mario karts yeah good job you fucking
piece of shit
let's go let's start new sorry let's start fresh welcome to another episode of
bad friends my name
is bobby and um you know what dude i've been thinking about the moon what have
you been thinking
about the moon i don't want to live there me neither that would be terrible
yeah too far and but um i
would visit it like armstrong did lance or louis did lance go all the way out
the nut cancer that's
lance did you buy one of those yellow bands back in the day no i bought i
bought a whole what's the
yellow mean remember he had like the live strong bracelets i bought a fuckload
of them is it because
of the steroids or the cancer both one led to the other i guess no but they
were two dollars and then
one dollar went to cancer research and the other one went you know to the to
the production of them
you can still buy live strong bracelets oh that's amazing why don't we have bad
friends bracelets
and we should we should have them yeah but what should the dot what should the
donation be so a
dollar goes to the production and a dollar goes to what our charity of choice
we should do that
yeah the charity is um well i think somebody's the fun my uh you know video
game play cannot be you
oh it has to be a third party can't be you um something you care about around
the world that we
what do i really care about honestly um stilts for dwarves stilts we're a big
stilt
family because i think that they can be taller they can be
you know or that operation can i just say something you know the operation
where they
sever the bones in china they do it they sever the bones when chinese people
are um short
and then they can't walk for a year but then the grows the bone grows in yeah
and they become taller yeah
with a callus on it or something yeah they insert some bone in there can we do
that limb lengthening
surgery can we do that we can yeah yeah we can do okay would you get your limbs
lengthened what would
you get your limbs lengthened um no because i don't want my just my legs i'll
look weird so funny if
you had super long legs if i me yeah you look like a lollipop if you had really
long legs well i would
do stuff to my upper body so they would match like what sit-ups dad no oh yeah
i would look like a
lollipop yeah you'd be a lollipop or like those cake pops at starbucks yes yeah
yeah yeah interesting
what would you get done if you could get a cosmetic surgery what would you get
done
um i probably would if i could do if i could like have a like like a body um
thing it probably genuinely
would be i'd get a butt butt injection i get bigger butt whoa i want a big
trunk dude
i i think you're i think you're right about the area but can i say something
what tighten up my
butthole you think no that pipes i saw your butthole on the tour bus yeah can i
share that
what'd you see inside of there not inside it's you you need rectal darkening i
need to i know i need
some coloring it's way too pink can you tattoo the inside of your touch you
should be able to do it
because it's like it was so pink it looked like a octopus pussy
i'm like is that octopus pussy did you see anything hanging out in there no it
was because i've had a
guy very clean well i've had a temporary resident in there sometimes like a
mouse a hemorrhoid oh
i've had a tenant i'm like what are you richard gear i've had i've had a tenant
that's uh not paying
rent i gotta tell you and he comes and goes as he pleases he's squatting can
you see it from the
outside i have a hemorrhoid that's squatting right now like if you showed me
your butthole would
i be able to see its little eyes stick out yeah does it hurt sometimes yeah it
does sometimes it
hurts but i you know i got it probably from you know what i mean yeah yeah you
this bobby how well you
know what would be cool about stress that's what they're from stress oh have
you seen the seashells
with the little slugs in it with their beautiful eyes mm-hmm and they look so
cute yeah right
why can't hemorrhoids have that that's true sticking out your butt little eyes
sticking out
then it'd be so cute yeah yeah and looking around yeah you'd be less stressed
yeah i gotta be less
stressed i know you'd be less stressed if it was cute like yeah like no that'd
be more stress
because everybody would want to see it dude if that was your hemorrhoid look at
the little eyes
that's so cute so cute and then we go hey charlie hey guys yeah oh that'd be
great can i do five
minutes to open the show yeah charlie you bombed last week we're not gonna let
you do it twice
come on i got some good ones my dad had a skin tag in his tank oh you had a
hanger huh
wait how did you see your dad's taint bud this is a story i guess we gotta hear
here we go when i was a kid he took me to a korean spa
and you know korean if you go to a korean spa they stretch they get naked and
stretch yeah they do and
they make one noise oh no close i go i go i go i go in a row so they stretch
and one day i was just
sitting there on like a bench and my dad was going i go i go and he bent over
and there was a skin tag
and in my head this is how crazy i was i i heard the skin tag talk
and you know what he said help help he's trapped right and then i would have
like this inner like
dialogue with the skin tag like why didn't you go up in the neck where all the
other skin tags are
what you grew in the wrong place no he got lost i know he got lost he got
separated transfer that over
the neck you can't yeah imagine ruining it i mean removing a skin tag and then
placing it somewhere
else on your body from your taint to your neck i just went here yeah yeah yeah
honestly i've never
seen my dad's taint i can't believe you got to see that have you seen your dad's
genitals penis yeah
every boy sees their dad's penis at a certain age there we go yeah you do yeah
yeah my dad got out of
the shower i was like seven and he go and i was like oh sorry and i walked in
he goes get over here
whoa whoa whoa and i came back in and he goes you like wind i go wind yeah he
goes you like mills
they go mills yeah he goes what about windmills and he windmilled it and he
just windmilled it and
honestly it was so big i heard that's hilarious it was nuts you know what my
dad used to do what
he i don't know why but he heard about the pink pull my finger but he didn't
know that there was a
fart so he's gonna pull my finger i pull it nothing would happen what did he
think that was
there's supposed to be a fart at the end of that dad