Name: Juicy's English Muffin | Bad Friends Clips
Uploaded: 2023-07-13T07:00:04.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Juicy's English Muffin | Bad Friends Clips' from Bad Friends Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2023-07-13. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Juicy's English Muffin | Bad Friends Clips' from Bad Friends Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2023-07-13. Transcript available.

give us your best british accent right now okay okay oh my god that's so bad
hello do it again what you mean you didn't like it the first time
it's so bad i like it tell me your tell me in your best british accent that
like your grocery
store list like you're reading me off your your grocery store all right all
right let's see what
we got here i need some potatoes potatoes let her do it let her do it ask my
records why do i pick
that word yeah we don't sell that here aspergers yeah you're the store manager
bonjour oh yeah they
do they do hello hello hello are you looking for asperger's yes you have asperger's
here asperger's
as an internal disease right or an affliction the one that makes your piss
smell oh we have got that
in the in the in the vegetable veggie aisle all right all right all right all
right you know it's so
great we're at a this is like a film school yeah we're fired imagine how little
these kids are
learning from us they're listening to this being like this can't be good this
is not what we should
be knowing let me ask you this i think that sounded really good the english
come over here right and then
through time we came up with our own accent what the happened how come we don't
talk like this now
well you know transatlantic became an accent when they were crossing over the
ocean because
so many people were blending their their accents together and then what
happened is when you move
to different sections atlantic so they're they're binary too huh the oceans non
non-binary
oceans are non-binary yeah yeah like like have you ever seen the oceans are
getting involved well
the pacific ocean does if i call an ocean a lake they're like maybe i can be
whatever i want they
want oh yeah so an ocean could be a river is that what they're saying it can
now i don't like it it's
just a body it's too far a body of water it's too far for me what's next you're
going to take away river
rights yeah but if you know if i'm like looking at the ocean i'm going hey pacific
you're you know you're
an ocean they're like i'm a puddle then in my mind i'd be like i don't think
you are man yeah but i am
i'm the pacific ocean and i'll be whatever i want to be okay okay i'm not even
water anymore how about
that i'm land you have land is water whoa that's intense so nothing makes sense
anymore correct
nothing means anything so transatlantic i'm transatlantic yeah do you know what
the transatlantic
accent was do you know what i'm referring to no when you hear that this very
like astute debonair
type of talk when everyone went up yes that was a transatlantic accent mean
there was like a during the
the course of people coming over accents were merged and forged together so it's
kind of sounded like
this like tv talk a little bit old timey hollywood yeah exactly right yeah
transatlantic had very much
of this a very very astute and high class transatlantic nobody sounded like
that in england
i talk like this now get your paper now but then that stuff all dissipated and
people started to move
away duke them up duke them up duke them up show me what you guys well show me
your show me your dukes
or put them up you can't it's not duke them up i say do come up i see i say do
come up put out some
billy holiday so here you land on ellis island yeah right where's the first
place you're moving to
ellis island well you can't move here man this is the port so you got to pick a
place okay i'll i'll move to
um maine maine what part of maine portsmouth portsmouth maine is is there a
portsmouth maine
there sure is is it really so you came all the way here from china yeah yes i
have
and what's your trade my trade yeah dynamite so you just have you make dynamite
well at first my friend
and first my friend i was gonna work on the railroad that's it i have a movie
this is it yeah i was
gonna win the railroad but i found out a transatlantic chinese guy yeah yeah
but i found out that the
chinese were blowing up so i decided i'm gonna move to portsmouth and i'll tell
you my buddy friend
do come up do come up and i'm gonna work in the lobster trade oh smart and
clams and mussels
and other crustaceans sounds like you got your whole life pattern out does
anybody want a paper
why are you trying to fight everyone who's trying to do come up do come up that's
so angry is your
how do you know i was chinese yeah is your publication i refuse to work on the
railroad is your publication
called do come up yes do come up papers you see and i you know you know you
from where i come from
right we do hiya hiya no i'm now transatlantic i do it dude that would be a
cool
fucking ramen ramen ramen what let's start a ramen company called gook'em up
what do you mean
i would buy ramen that's called gook'em up he's hungry yeah you're starving
yeah that's
all it is i'm so hungry i had breakfast and lunch right now he changed his
dynamite
the transatlantic i like this guy i like this guy welcome to america kid yes
thank you what's
my new name i'm chang no not anymore i know but i was chang what is my name now
your name's jimmy
- Jimmy, Jimmy, Jimmy. - Post Chang.
You're Post Chang. - Post Chang, what's my last name?
- Your name is Post Chang.
- Post Chang. - Jimmy Post Chang.
- Jimmy Post Chang. - Jimmy Post Chang.
- Jimmy Duke 'em up Post Chang.
- You know the legend of Jimmy Duke 'em up Post Chang?
One of the greatest boxer slash crustacean sellers
of all time. - Hello.
- But you know what sucks about us back in the day?
You know, I mean, we were in San Francisco Asians, right?
- Yeah.
- And probably New York and stuff, right?
'Cause you know, the Chinatown and stuff like that.
But there was no cross, like, do you think back in the day
in the '40s or the '30s, I'd be able to get white girls?
- No. - Yeah.
White girls have no rights.
- No. - What?
- You still don't.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah. - No, I have a little more.
- White girls got no rights?
- White girls got no rights back then.
- What are you talking about?
- What are you talking about?
- Well, they could've voted and you would get married one easy.
- No, but he's saying, could he hook up with white girls?
They're not gonna hook up with-- - No, you'd have to marry one
and people talk forever. - I don't think they would even marry him.
I think that they would look right through me.
- Not if you were Jimmy Dougamup Post-Chang.
- Jimmy Dougamup Post-Chang.
- Oh, Jimmy Dougamup Post-Chang?
- Everybody knows you. - Oh, fuck.
- On the Eastern Seaboard,
you're the hottest, sexiest Chinese men of all time.
- Very successful shellfish business.
- That's right. - Whoa, yeah.
- I've heard of you.
Are you Jimmy Dougamup Post-Chang?
- Yes. - Yes, I am.
- I've heard of the crustacean business.
- I have the crustacean business.
- Would you like to eat my white muffin?
- Does it taste like mussels?