Name: Bobby Lee’s Legendary Tale | Bad Friends Clips
Uploaded: 2023-09-14T16:00:15.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Bobby Lee’s Legendary Tale | Bad Friends Clips' from Bad Friends Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2023-09-14. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Bobby Lee’s Legendary Tale | Bad Friends Clips' from Bad Friends Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2023-09-14. Transcript available.

well let me tell you something about stolen money what i just watched something
on the history
channel here we go about the most corrupt dictator of all time in the philippines
bong bong marcos you know about this piece of shit ferdinand marcos do you know
about
ferdinand marcos i know about the third day no do it the third day is different
who's worse
that 30 or boom boom no marcos marcos dude this guy is worse than the third day
for not
bong bong no no ferdinand marcos ferdinand marcos who's bong bong bong is his
son that's
his kid all right all right bong bong is his son bing bong is his brother is
there a soup soup
yeah there's gotta be this fucking guy this guy was a genius by the way this
piece of shit him and
his family they i mean terrible people while people in philippines in the 80s
were living in abject
poverty this fucking scumbag literally stole hundreds of millions of dollars
they think maybe
billions from the people the filipino people that he stole from japanese hidden
gold bars in the caves of the philippines during the war and this motherfucker
who's that lady
that's his wife is that boom boom that's it that looks like a boom that's bim
beam that's bim beam
bap is in the coffin it's that's bim beam oh he died that's bop that's no the
guy that we're
talking about died yeah he's dead they're dead yeah they're dead are you upset
about it no she's happy
oh they were evil right they were bad you weren't even around but i watched
this whole thing this
fucking genius this evil genius his brother or uncle was the judge that allowed
cruz to start
digging to hunt for this missing gold uh-huh genius and he was like oh there's
all these guys that are
digging for fucking gold he's like perfect when they find it we'll either kill
them or imprison them
and then we'll just take it all so they did every time someone went down they
were like oh he went
missing and then they would just steal all look at this look at these gold bars
that they would find
gold buddha well okay so that was here's what you do yeah what you know what to
do what you
first of all if i was one of the guys which one though no no i'm not boom boom
or any of those
you're just i'm a guy that's you're a little filipino i'm a hunter you're a
hunter yeah yeah i'm a lamb
herder yeah at best what do you mean lamb singular you don't have more than one
i know but that's what
i do for a living yeah lamb i'm a lammer i look at the fucking filipino express
right which is their
local newspaper correct right and i go you mean gold bar hunter wanted you're
signing up well i would
false name what would your name be jackson jackson whoa well they go boom boom
you know i mean so i
gotta go i get it soup soup jackson jackson yeah it all sounds jackson jackson
right yeah and then um
i'd probably do something my face what i put just put mud on it or whatever no
no no what not in this
ear i don't think i don't think you can mud up your face over there what do you
mean you can't do
like browner face that's not brown face that's mud face mud face mud face the
brown face because
they're let me say something you're the mud from the philippines is lighter oh
why do you need mud
what why do you need mud i'm gonna change the way i look i'm jackson jackson
now the lighter mud is
that why is that i don't know let's see it that right lighter mud not that that
that's too dark so
listen let me tell you something well let me do you think you're gonna get
employed to go hunt for gold
what skills do you offer here listen i am i'm the guy this is this is this is
my confidant and i
okay right okay i'm chip chip yeah and that's chop chop yeah yeah and we're we're
looking for gold
hunters so tell us your my god what are your qualifications i come in ask him
what his
qualifications are hello do it in sebonese or whatever the fuck it is oh jackson
jackson
my lamb excuse me i brought my lamb that can't be in here what no take that
outside put that what
i'm jackson jackson i'm holder huh i i'm a lamb holder i have one lamb he's
hurting lamb he's hurting
lamb that's what i do but leaping and that's why i i want to have this job
because i make the monies
okay all right sorry hold on let my constituent talk to you okay all right soup
soup leap oh you
suck the lamb oh shit you dirty fucking pig i'm getting i i feel like are you
soup soup the lamb i
feel like i'm getting accused of something that i didn't know no to well you
did okay it sounds like
i come sitting here for a job first of you accused me of sucking my lamb you
said it to the lamb i heard
you soup soup soup the lamb oh you called him yes oh what the fuck what the
fucking around here
all right my constituent wants to ask you get the fuck out right okay hold on
let him leave let him
what's going on what's going on jackson jackson yes are you chinese no why are
you are you mine
what why are you yelling at me are you filipino i am filipino of course i'm
real filipino who's your
mom look at my skin who's your mom my what who's your mom mong dupree do you
know mong dupree i do
she know mong dupree i know her yeah yeah yeah she she do one sheep she lives
in the she lives she
lives in the tree i have one lamb she live in the tree with one sheep mong dupree
who lives in the
tree yeah anyway child song right and she by the way she don't suck on the
sheep by the way i know
you're gonna accuse of my mama while sucking on sheep i only suck on lamb okay
so fuck you okay
hey hey you're trying to get a job oh sorry slow down go ahead okay ma'am go
ahead
there it is nice go ahead okay can i call your juk juk uh-oh let me ask you
something wait you
you want to change my name for jackson jackson the juk juk why so i can hire
you and i can
remember your name you can't memorize jackson jackson holy shit don't question
her holiness by the way
don't question her holiness i want to go because there's another gold hunting
there's another gold hunting that i went earlier and they accept my name
no stay stay okay okay okay juk juk yes you're hired good thank you wow that
fast no skill nothing
no i'm blind you know i'm blind right that's why i have the fucking lamb he's
my you know
seeing lamb i seeing island no see i seeing lamb i see that's what i just said
right it's
back you sorry you're right i don't know how to speak you're right i apologize
so anyway i get
so what i would do glasses are fogging up again yeah yeah so what i would do is
uh let's kind of get
out of jackson jackson or no no oh what stay oh stay stay stay stay stay stay
stay this is who you
are now you're jackson jackson baby all right i don't want to stay jackson jackson
all right so
anyway what would you really do check it out check it out well here's what i
would do let's just so
i would go in there and lie to these people right yeah because i knew there
would be murdering going
on of course right it's yeah because tanya tanya my cousin she got killed yeah
fredic fredic fredic
fredic fredic killed fredic fredic got killed they all got killed what yeah and
my you know my mom in
the sheet in the tree my mom in the tree yeah yeah she told me yeah they die oh
no they get murdered
with they find the gold that's why she's in the tree they can't get her up so
you know what i would
so i would look up at the tree and go mom check mama meet me jackson jackson
check it out right
and i'm going to lift up my leg like this right and then she's gonna what
happened to your leg
it's gone right and i got prosthetic and she's like ah so i'll find when i find
the gold i find
one bar stuff it in your leg i stuff it in the leg yeah and then i walk out of
the whatever the
fucking you know the cave or whatever so you only want one bar i'll be like i'm
blind i can't see
no gold where's your sheep what where's the sheep check it out dude look at his
leg
look at his leg prosthetic yeah there's gotta be small bar little baby bars
yeah yeah sheep
like a little one maybe right and he's just like he's he's bummed well you know
what it's heavy the
guards will see it though they'll go he walked funny they'll see the sheep
because they don't
like they don't like sheep sham shaming there you read the culture there's no
sheep sham shaming
there's no sheep shipping read the culture right in the philippines what about
you they'll see you're
walking funny they'll go why you're like oh excuse me look i i would take the
fucking prosthetic out
you'd show them the goals no the the goats in the they're not gonna look inside
sure they will
filipino fucking cave guards cave guards what do you think they're doing they're
not tsa bro you
think i'm getting my fucking leg my fucking prosthetic leg from america i made
it well then it's
that is definitely not gonna work it is you better get it from china i already
do my thinking is this
dude yeah they are gonna look in it yeah they're gonna look right in it right
so you do an optical
illusion obviously mirrors all right carlos obviously obviously like a swirl oh
yeah you
stare at a swirl in the center of the thing right yeah and then they look away
it's everything's like
blurry what are you talking about magic guy you'd put a magic guy in there yes
yeah and then they're gonna be like oh what's going on everything's so boring i
think you got this all
figured out