Name: Rudy Guesses Our Ages... | Bad Friends Clips
Uploaded: 2023-11-17T16:00:32.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Rudy Guesses Our Ages... | Bad Friends Clips' from Bad Friends Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2023-11-17. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Rudy Guesses Our Ages... | Bad Friends Clips' from Bad Friends Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2023-11-17. Transcript available.

dude talk about poos i had dinner with gene hong you know gene right of course
right
we're eating at our favorite chinese restaurant in korea town then we go let's
get some ice cream
we're in waiting in line ice cream and i look at him i go eight minutes in
eight men in eight
minutes gene i'm gonna poo my pants eight minutes flat i gave him the time he
goes get in the car
that's pretty good to know the time though dude seven seven minutes and 55
seconds i enter his
house as soon as i go to the toilet it came out it was like it could have been
a disaster dude it is
funny to think about it must be in there going like yeah i know like when you
when you guys holding on
an alleged building you know trying to evade but like i think i know how to
like count it out now
when your timing is that good it's so good dude and that's what i want to say i
have talent you
do have a lot of talent you know there's certain talents i know i can't play
batminton you mean i
can't really run the good you're not good at horseshoes i'm not good at horseshoe
bowling you're
great up you love a good you want to play bowling with this guy don't don't
even play with me buddy
because i'm gonna beat you he'll destroy you dude speaking of which what's this
thing doing in front
of the picture there of a of a uh this yeah it's just like uh oh one million uh
decorations why is
it in front of you no no no no no no no no don't go anywhere with it leave it
right there
if you think you deserve it because it's on your picture it's on your why is it
when we're on stage
in boston and we have a girl on stage and i go how you know what's your name
she says her name
and i go how do you uh do you like our pocket no she goes i fuck carlos yeah i
fuck carlos we hooked
up that night too you did yeah i saw you guys necking at the bar but okay so
there's 5 000 people there
right you have to bring your buddy on stage is that what the deal is she signed
up it was deliberate
though he put her name it was deliberate yeah it was deliberate there's no way
how much easier it is
for him to score when the girl that he's hooking up with gets randomly i'm
gonna give you a little
fame that's what you did exchange fame for okay that's what it was that's what
you did that night
and also don't blame me for picking her you put her name on the list five times
i think it was a bit
you know like a magician is shoveling cards and is like any card but this one
for sure yeah that's
what he did can i say thank you because it did help me you're welcome also that
was the third time
you had sex with her fourth whoa so she's not right no i mean she no judgment's
a little wrong
she's off i'm not saying anything about her she probably burns herself in the
fire every
once in a while just to feel just a few no like accident like oh yeah that
burns i forgot i think
she might turn on the stove once in a while just to see if maybe it'll hurt her
yeah that's what i'm
saying she'll leave the stove on you leave one of the burners on but do you
want to see what i had to
deal with while i was hooking up with her this is oh yeah what did you have to
deal with while you were
hooking up with her i had to listen to this what shotgunning beers but calm in
the other room who's
that guy so this guy wait who the is that guy i didn't see him all night my
boyfriend he showed
up to the after party the little after get together we all got together yeah
this guy showed up straight
out of the outback i mean where do you find people like this in a shed
somewhere being hidden from
society this guy is he was born in a rave born right he was born at a rave dude
look at him it makes
patchouli and molly yeah in a bucket for a few days and this guy was born out
of it i mean this guy
what a strange strange bird it's a crazy one and this is macone's good buddy so
he was in the while
you guys were hooking up they were in the kitchen shotgunning beers yeah and i
could why did you bring
him back to the place you were hooking up at well macone brought well you guys
share a room yeah i know
but kick them out and make them go wait wait you share a room yeah sweet on
that one so there's two
different rooms exactly oh i see but usually there's not okay usually he has to
they have to yeah i know
that yeah yeah so he came back to the room macone out of respect carlos put a
sock on the door
and tell him come back later that's the code that's bro code macone you're
really living the life huh
doesn't deserve it doesn't do at the show true right he takes i i told him to
do one thing the
photo was pretty good okay right but not great let's be honest it was fine it
was fine okay he takes one
photo of me fancy an ad right before i did that and i was just to celebrate
sending fancy uh the ad
for last week at 3 a.m yeah three in the morning so you waited till 3 a.m to
send him hey i did some
work it's three in the morning three in my time so it was it was 6 a.m you were
up till 6 a.m in new
year in boston the sun was starting to come up a little bit wow why are we
paying and i also attention
did i text you in the morning like where's the video where's the video how long
did it take me
to get it i was i was how long did it take me to get it i'm asking you a
question he's not a fast one
yeah he did it in l.a when we were exactly exactly he you did it in l.a he did
it in the uber
you did it in the uber did you not oh yeah yeah that's not professional dude i
know man i don't
understand happy birthday man thank you dude yeah happy birthday thank you bobby
let's focus on the
only one that cares about i know i love you none of your business you don't
know you don't ask me
hey hey pal do you have google google it oh okay he's not just a well how about
you guys he's just
a random guy who works at somewhere i guess so no this guy google it no no no
how old is andrew
santino why don't you guess i'd like you to guess let's see like in filipino
terms what am i 38.
wow close feels good 39 pretty close 40 pretty close 42 pretty close
you're older pretty close 45 yeah 47 oh pretty close 48 oh pretty close close
40 i'm 40 i'm 40 i'm 40 years old
i thought you how does it feel i thought i thought i thought i was what i
thought you were 47
you know what i'll tell you why i know it's your maturity thank you
and that's where i'm gonna go because i saw the rage come up yeah right and i
saw what i'm trying to
fight it back right fight back on some zen stuff lately i've been sending out
yeah yeah yeah and that one
so and you know and you know what oh i know it's a positive i'm about to do it
look at me i'm about
to do it what i'm about to go after that little don't call it that thing again
man
little piece of yeah let me tell you something yeah let me tell you you know
how quickly we
can ship exactly here bud back on a boat yeah you'll be back on a boat making
stuff out of bamboo again
yeah you will in no time i'll have you deported yeah i'm sorry no you're not
sorry at all
you brought me one rogue chicken wing what a shitty birthday gift it was good
though yeah i'm sure it
was i'm sure it was you can clean a house so i can tell you that right yeah
they all can can't they
dude you can clean my house can you yeah yeah man i feel 40 how do i feel like
how do you feel i feel
40. i feel 40. it's it's a milestone it's a big deal
so you're thinking about it i don't like it yeah yeah yeah dude try 50. yeah
but but when i turned
50 i was like oh is death around death is around the corner somewhere but not
that close
to me it's close you're closer yeah you're definitely close i'm closer i'm
closer than you
yeah well yeah i feel like you and i will die at the same time oh that'd be
great i think we'll die
together and i i i i have dreams of this in a chalet we'll die in a swiss chalet
a swiss chalet
on a mountain but it's not snowing why isn't it because it's summertime we're
in a swiss chalet
in the summertime there's not a lot of tourists i'm drinking a cup of coffee i'm
naked on the patio
right i have melted i don't know why i've melted chocolate on my body what do
you mean you don't
know why you know what we just what do we do yeah you know i do do but i don't
the fans i do and i
don't yeah but so i'm out there you're drinking your thing i'm naked but naked
melted chocolate on my
body tanning a little bit tanning and then for some reason there's like a with
those rubber ducks
little tiny rubber duckies yeah rubber duckies on the because i'm making a
chocolate lake yeah on my
stomach fondue that's what they call it right fondue a fondue right right i got
little duckies right
yeah my dick yeah where is it in my ass yes no wait a minute how did you do
that to me that's
incredible pretty good right you get there i know i got there i tricked you
dude