Name: Bobby Lee Cut From TV Show?! w/ Dave Attell
Uploaded: 2024-04-09T16:00:24.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Bobby Lee Cut From TV Show?! w/ Dave Attell' from Bad Friends Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-04-09. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Bobby Lee Cut From TV Show?! w/ Dave Attell' from Bad Friends Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-04-09. Transcript available.

Bobby is interested in dating a Jewish woman.
Can you help him acquire him?
Never had one. Never had one. Never one Jew.
Wow. I think you could do that.
How? Do you, though?
I know how you could do it. Yes.
Do Jewish women like Asian men? I'm Palestinian.
Whoa. Opposite to track.
That's going to be tough, Bob.
We do want to get him.
He's never dated a Jewish girl.
And I said, why, why, we're in Los Angeles.
Like, how not? And he just, what?
He says he can't land any Jewish girls.
Well, I've been hooking up with Arabs.
Oh, I love it.
He's a big Arab fan. I love the Arabs.
You like a little sideburn on your lady?
Yeah. I mean, they never used to like me.
Uh-huh. But now with this new fame?
Yeah. My options have opened.
Well, they have the same kind of mustache, him and the Arab women.
Yeah, yeah. But they have it down there.
They have it down there. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
That's what we're looking for on the sheiks of sunset.
You coming in.
Season cliffhanger.
Yeah. You like giggling, boys?
Yes. I love it, too.
All right.
These boys are our, did you meet? Did everybody meet?
Yeah, we met earlier.
earlier. Our nice production team of ragtag individuals, misfits, and Carlos is
97 days sober.
I'm a little over 100 now.
Oh, it's over 100 now.
Hey, that's great, dude.
Congrats.
You guys are Dave Attell fans?
Yeah.
Yeah.
What was, name me an album.
No, no, no. Hold on. Hold on. Hold on.
Space for the memories.
Oh, that's a great album.
I only have one.
I know. I love it. Space for the memories is amazing.
That would be great.
That was a good test.
Fancy doesn't know. Andres doesn't know.
Is it in Spanish?
Yeah. Do you have any stuff in Spanish for him?
Do you have any? I was going to give him a comb. I mean, look at the hair. How'd
you get
here, buddy? Power glider? Huh? Yeah, I see. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Look at this guy.
Si, senor.
You really have a multicultural feel going on in here. I love it.
What do you mean? Well, you just look at me and saying that.
But that I mean, you're not paying anybody.
Can I say one thing, guys?
Hey, go ahead. Have we started yet, or is this what you guys call the tailgate?
This is what we do.
No, we just kind of get going. We just kind of get going.
Move it in. This is the podcast that I've been dying to do.
I'm out here promoting and promoting. I'm like, when do I get to sit with these
guys?
Yeah. Now I am. And I'm sitting in the, this is awesome.
I remember these in that movie Wonka.
I mean, that's what happens when you're bad and they put an Oompa Loompa in the
chair
and give him a talk down.
Because they can't get out of those.
Yeah. We actually got those, there was a estate sale.
We got those from Puff Daddy's house right here that they raided.
Wow. Yeah, they put those on the lawn.
I was going to say, after Pee Wee died, this is his.
It's right out of the playhouse.
The reading of his will.
So let's introduce.
Please do. May I?
Please, I just said.
All right, so the first time I met Dave was years ago.
Um, this guy named Ned.
Remember Ned?
Ned, uh.
Carlos Mencia.
Oh, okay.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
You know him by his, uh, superpower name.
Uh, super.
Yes.
And we did a tour.
Remember that tour we did?
Uh-huh.
That was a big deal for us.
Yeah, yeah.
Back then Ned was like, I'm going to, you know, get the biggest white dude,
the biggest black dude, biggest Asian.
I was the only Asian.
Who was the biggest black dude?
Who was a DC, not DC Curry.
It was DC Curry.
No, I, I don't remember playing like that, but I remember it was like a big
deal tour.
It was like a theater tour.
Yeah, yeah.
Outdoor venues.
Yeah.
I think Ralphie was on some of those.
Yeah, yeah.
It was huge.
It was huge.
And we, it was the first big tour I've ever done in terms of theaters.
Amphitheaters outside.
No, they weren't amphitheaters.
Oh, no.
They were like 3,000, 2,500.
Yeah, I, I don't remember.
I don't really, I, I remember bombing.
That's all I remember.
Oh, no, no, no.
I did not do well.
He would do the talk for me.
Like, you know, this guy coming out.
I think he's funny.
You should think he's funny.
He was trying to like strong arm his crowd, you know?
Yeah.
It was like a Mexican crowd.
Oh, really?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Pretty Mexican.
Yeah.
So green.
Yeah.
But you, you did good.
I remember.
Oh, man.
Even when you were green, you were still a little yellow.
So it's, you got through it.
Wow.
You were laughing too.
I know.
You can't do the hard look after you laugh at the joke.
You're right.
You're right.
I laugh first again.
Yeah.
Yeah.
You have to do the hard.
Laugh again.
Oh.
That's how it was supposed to go down.
Yeah.
But.
He's like Kanye.
He doesn't want to be caught laughing.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
Lou, and then Louie.
Mm-hmm.
This is my, I'm just, my history with them.
Mm-hmm.
L.A.
Yes, I'm from L.A.
Yeah.
And we used to write together.
Yes.
Wait a minute.
You mean Louie used to write and you were near him?
Oh, he got you.
What?
You know what I knew?
Dude, when you squint your eyes and your face gets all red, right?
I know you're about to dig.
Well, because he's a phenomenal joke writer.
I know.
And I know Louie was just ripping through pages.
And he was sitting there smoking, like looking over your shoulder.
Good stuff, Louie.
Sorry.
It's so funny.
It's great.
It's great.
It's great stuff.
Can I throw more stories in?
Yeah.
What I always loved about you, Bobby, is like, you would do a great set.
They would love you.
And then you'd come running off.
And then you would be like, I can't do an hour.
All right?
There's no reason why I should be up there for an hour.
And I'm like, they could have watched you for like two hours.
They were really having a great time.
He still does it.
I still do it.
I still do it.
I still do it.
I still do it.
Can't do it.
I feel the same way.
I feel the same way.
Yeah, yeah.
I feel exactly the same way.
I'm like, I want out.
I want out of here.
You know what I'm saying?
Or you've gone through all your material.
Then you look at the clock and it's like 33 minutes.
I hate that.
Oh, I hate it.
I hate it.
I guess I'm going to have to do improv.
Yeah.
I hate it.
So Louie used to write.
Yeah, that's right.
He's probably one of the best joke writers.
I have a better story, dude.
Remember when we were on the sitcom together?
Oh my God.
This is crazy.
I hate it.
This is crazy.
This is PTSD.
This is my favorite Bobby story.
Go ahead.
In the early aughts.
You were a regular on the sitcom too.
I was on Mad TV.
Okay, but no, no, this is not that.
We were on a thing called used car smell.
Yeah, new car smell.
New car smell.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
The guys who did it were really cool.
They wanted comics on it.
I fucked them.
Fuck them.
Wait, hold on.
No, no, I want to get into it.
Okay, but hold on.
It was you, me, and Jimmy Schubert.
Yes.
And I'm not an actor.
Totally not an actor.
And they kept giving me these long, like, setups for the regular people to get
the punchline.
And I'm like, what the?
I can't.
I can't do.
I can't.
You know, and I wanted to like Red Fox it and like write it on the walls and
stuff.
But anyway, yeah.
I'm not even on the thing, right?
Brooke Shields?
No, see, I thought you were like a special guest or something.
No, no, no.
I was a real-
Brooke Shields was in it.
The guy, the lead guy is like a great actor.
And he was like rolling his eyes every time I opened my mouth.
What's his name over there?
But he was like a really good actor.
Oh, Christopher McDonald?
Yeah.
I was supposed to be a fucking series regular.
He's like A+.
A legit actor.
Anyway, you and I, hold on a second.
You and I and Jimmy, we're all going into our scenes and then we'd be smoking
outside safe.
Yeah.
And every time, I believe this was like on the warm up or whatever it is, the
dry run through
or something, we'd all run out and say the same thing.
I can't act.
I can't believe they're going to fire me.
I'm getting my stuff now because they're going to fire me by lunch.
I'm out of here.
Yeah.
And I was like, when you said that, and then I felt like so much better.
I was like, oh, great.
I'm not the only non-actor here.
Yeah.
But you were killing it.
And then it went on.
And then finally, we were doing it in front of a crowd.
You know that?
Like we were in front of a crowd.
And then the real actors, they were like stumbling on the lines.
But we were rocking it because we were like totally whoring it up to the crowd.
Like, I don't know.
Whatever you say, JJ.
You know, like we were totally succumbing.
Yeah, yeah.
Then Mitch Hedberg died.
A lot happened in that week.
It was a big week.
I'm not kidding.
Was that the week?
That was the week.
Oh, my God.
Wow.
Look at David Walton.
There it is.
New car smell.
Yeah.
Put it up full screen.
Let me see.
This is the full pilot.
Can you imagine, Bobby, if that went?
Can you imagine?
We'd be retired now.
I would've been fired.
Look at Dave.
No, no.
Oh, there he is.
Look at that.
Awesome.
I will say, it's weird to not see you in all black.
I love it.
And that look is still really in, you know?
Yeah.
Mostly in the Middle East.
How come dressed up?
Somehow dressed up, you look sleazier.
It really does.
I hate it.
Well, can I tell you my experience on that real quick?
Brooke Shields, by the way, she's very cool.
She was very cool.
I hated her.
Why?
I fucking hated her.
I like her.
No, I don't give a fuck.
Get out of your podcast.
Oh, wait.
I have to leave.
Wait, what did you not like about her?
Am I edited out of that thing?
Yeah, I can't find you.
You can't find me.
Look at me lurking in the back.
Dude, you're such a good lurker though.
What's going on over there?
Yeah.
No, I had to go there because I was overacting so much.
They had to push me back.
They had to push me way back.
Can't even stand naturally.
You're standing in a weird way.
That's a Meisner I'm using.
You can't find me in there, right?
No.
Well, you think they scrubbed you?
Yeah.
They cut me out.
So Fox calls me and they go,
there's a show called New Car Smell.
We want you in it.
And I go, okay.
And then they go,
but the Cullen brothers don't want you in it.
What?
The guys who made the show.
Oh, that was their names.
Yeah, the Cullen brothers.
Not the Coen brothers.
The Cullen brothers.
Cullen brothers.
Right.
It doesn't seem like a Cullen brothers.
I'm glad you caught that, Louie.
I thought it was the Coen brothers too.
So then they go,
but they want Getty Wananabe.
Oh yeah.
Long duck dong.
Yeah.
He's great.
He is.
Objectively.
He's great.
I would hire him over you.
No, no, no, no.
100%.
Let me ask you, friend.
Yeah.
If you were a show runner, right?
Yeah.
You pick him before me?
100%.
I wouldn't even think about it.
Yeah.
So you were the backup.
Basically.
Right.
So they forced me in.
And Rob Cullen would pull me aside and go,
listen, man.
You got to learn how to act.
Oh my God.
I swear to God.
I can't believe that.
Am I in the pilot?
They cut me out of it, Dave.
I thought you did a great job.
Oh, thank you so much.
Honestly.
I can't believe he would say that.
That would ruin your confidence.
It did.
Yeah.
It sure did.
So he was basically psyching you out.
Psyching me out.
And then like, I had two pages of dialogue.
It's not worth watching even for Bobby Lee fans.
It's a terrible show.
Should have never been made.
It's a waste of time, money and talent.
Yeah.
Did you just put that in there?
Yeah, he just wrote that.
I didn't type that.
Wait, go back to the pilot and scrub through it.
He's got to be in there.
I want to see the image.
Go back to the pilot.
I'm not in it, dude.
But my point is, I had two pages of dialogue.
And by the pilot, I had one line.
That's almost impossible.
I had one line.
It's a restaurant scene.
Anyway, and it was the worst human experience of my life.
What did Brooke Shields do?
And I've seen Rob a couple of times since then.
I wouldn't even look at him.
Really?
Yeah, yeah.
I fucked that guy.
That show business.
What did Brooke Shields do to you that you're so negative about?
Well, because the show owners didn't want me, you could feel it.
And so I was at craft service.
You know, in my mind, I'm like, you know, you're in Hollywood.
I know you're a comic, but let's break in and let's.
Yeah.
Let's mingle.
Let's smooth it.
And then I was sitting by the nuts and stuff.
And I go, good morning to Brooke.
Yeah.
And she didn't even.
Wow.
Wow.
I wasn't even there.
I got to tell you, I'm probably taking.
I think here.
This is the scene.
Yeah.
Well, we don't, we don't see you.
You're not in it.
No, no.
Before, no, before they start talking.
Oh.
Before there's any dialogue.
Is there a mannequin by any chance in there?
Okay.
What was that?
Dukes.
That's you.
Nice rack.
Yeah.
I was cut out of it.
I was cut out of the pilot.
Wow.
Yeah.
So is this, this other guy that you mentioned, that guy is kind of your double.
That's a person you're always up against.
No.
The long dog.
What happened?
Long dog.
Who are you against?
Getty Watanabe was much older.
And at that time, you know, he had done a couple of movies, you know, like,
like classics.
He was famous though.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
He was like very, very famous.
Right.
So, um, and I was like the new kid and Fox was trying to get the new kid in.
I see.
Well, cause you were cheaper.
I'm sure.
Oh, much cheaper.
That's what it was.
I'm serious.
I bet you they were like, we can just get this.
Cause I'm sure the pilot, you know, they overpay.
Bobby got all the money.
Well, they're the stars.
They're the guests.
And then I'm sure with him, they were like, let's just get Bobby Lee.
Yeah.
How Asian can you look?
Wow.
Had I.
I remember him.
Had I.
The nerds.
Yeah.
That was, that was the grand.
You need a movie like that.
That was a different Asian.
Oh, it was.
From Revenge of the Nerds.
Yeah.
Oh, okay.
Yeah, yeah.
But, but, but, but.
I know what you're saying.
Well, you're so good on that show, Shogun.
I mean, you're more of a dramatic actor.
Copies are losers.
Yeah.
Drama is worth that.

Bobby Lee Cut From TV Show?! w/ Dave Attell

Bobby is interested in dating a Jewish woman.
Can you help him acquire him?
Never had one. Never had one. Never one Jew.
Wow. I think you could do that.
How? Do you, though?
I know how you could do it. Yes.
Do Jewish women like Asian men? I'm Palestinian.
Whoa. Opposite to track.
That's going to be tough, Bob.
We do want to get him.
He's never dated a Jewish girl.
And I said, why, why, we're in Los Angeles.
Like, how not? And he just, what?
He says he can't land any Jewish girls.
Well, I've been hooking up with Arabs.
Oh, I love it.
He's a big Arab fan. I love the Arabs.
You like a little sideburn on your lady?
Yeah. I mean, they never used to like me.
Uh-huh. But now with this new fame?
Yeah. My options have opened.
Well, they have the same kind of mustache, him and the Arab women.
Yeah, yeah. But they have it down there.
They have it down there. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
That's what we're looking for on the sheiks of sunset.
You coming in.
Season cliffhanger.
Yeah. You like giggling, boys?
Yes. I love it, too.
All right.
These boys are our, did you meet? Did everybody meet?
Yeah, we met earlier.
earlier. Our nice production team of ragtag individuals, misfits, and Carlos is
97 days sober.
I'm a little over 100 now.
Oh, it's over 100 now.
Hey, that's great, dude.
Congrats.
You guys are Dave Attell fans?
Yeah.
Yeah.
What was, name me an album.
No, no, no. Hold on. Hold on. Hold on.
Space for the memories.
Oh, that's a great album.
I only have one.
I know. I love it. Space for the memories is amazing.
That would be great.
That was a good test.
Fancy doesn't know. Andres doesn't know.
Is it in Spanish?
Yeah. Do you have any stuff in Spanish for him?
Do you have any? I was going to give him a comb. I mean, look at the hair. How'd
you get
here, buddy? Power glider? Huh? Yeah, I see. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Look at this guy.
Si, senor.
You really have a multicultural feel going on in here. I love it.
What do you mean? Well, you just look at me and saying that.
But that I mean, you're not paying anybody.
Can I say one thing, guys?
Hey, go ahead. Have we started yet, or is this what you guys call the tailgate?
This is what we do.
No, we just kind of get going. We just kind of get going.
Move it in. This is the podcast that I've been dying to do.
I'm out here promoting and promoting. I'm like, when do I get to sit with these
guys?
Yeah. Now I am. And I'm sitting in the, this is awesome.
I remember these in that movie Wonka.
I mean, that's what happens when you're bad and they put an Oompa Loompa in the
chair
and give him a talk down.
Because they can't get out of those.
Yeah. We actually got those, there was a estate sale.
We got those from Puff Daddy's house right here that they raided.
Wow. Yeah, they put those on the lawn.
I was going to say, after Pee Wee died, this is his.
It's right out of the playhouse.
The reading of his will.
So let's introduce.
Please do. May I?
Please, I just said.
All right, so the first time I met Dave was years ago.
Um, this guy named Ned.
Remember Ned?
Ned, uh.
Carlos Mencia.
Oh, okay.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
You know him by his, uh, superpower name.
Uh, super.
Yes.
And we did a tour.
Remember that tour we did?
Uh-huh.
That was a big deal for us.
Yeah, yeah.
Back then Ned was like, I'm going to, you know, get the biggest white dude,
the biggest black dude, biggest Asian.
I was the only Asian.
Who was the biggest black dude?
Who was a DC, not DC Curry.
It was DC Curry.
No, I, I don't remember playing like that, but I remember it was like a big
deal tour.
It was like a theater tour.
Yeah, yeah.
Outdoor venues.
Yeah.
I think Ralphie was on some of those.
Yeah, yeah.
It was huge.
It was huge.
And we, it was the first big tour I've ever done in terms of theaters.
Amphitheaters outside.
No, they weren't amphitheaters.
Oh, no.
They were like 3,000, 2,500.
Yeah, I, I don't remember.
I don't really, I, I remember bombing.
That's all I remember.
Oh, no, no, no.
I did not do well.
He would do the talk for me.
Like, you know, this guy coming out.
I think he's funny.
You should think he's funny.
He was trying to like strong arm his crowd, you know?
Yeah.
It was like a Mexican crowd.
Oh, really?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Pretty Mexican.
Yeah.
So green.
Yeah.
But you, you did good.
I remember.
Oh, man.
Even when you were green, you were still a little yellow.
So it's, you got through it.
Wow.
You were laughing too.
I know.
You can't do the hard look after you laugh at the joke.
You're right.
You're right.
I laugh first again.
Yeah.
Yeah.
You have to do the hard.
Laugh again.
Oh.
That's how it was supposed to go down.
Yeah.
But.
He's like Kanye.
He doesn't want to be caught laughing.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
Lou, and then Louie.
Mm-hmm.
This is my, I'm just, my history with them.
Mm-hmm.
L.A.
Yes, I'm from L.A.
Yeah.
And we used to write together.
Yes.
Wait a minute.
You mean Louie used to write and you were near him?
Oh, he got you.
What?
You know what I knew?
Dude, when you squint your eyes and your face gets all red, right?
I know you're about to dig.
Well, because he's a phenomenal joke writer.
I know.
And I know Louie was just ripping through pages.
And he was sitting there smoking, like looking over your shoulder.
Good stuff, Louie.
Sorry.
It's so funny.
It's great.
It's great.
It's great stuff.
Can I throw more stories in?
Yeah.
What I always loved about you, Bobby, is like, you would do a great set.
They would love you.
And then you'd come running off.
And then you would be like, I can't do an hour.
All right?
There's no reason why I should be up there for an hour.
And I'm like, they could have watched you for like two hours.
They were really having a great time.
He still does it.
I still do it.
I still do it.
I still do it.
I still do it.
Can't do it.
I feel the same way.
I feel the same way.
Yeah, yeah.
I feel exactly the same way.
I'm like, I want out.
I want out of here.
You know what I'm saying?
Or you've gone through all your material.
Then you look at the clock and it's like 33 minutes.
I hate that.
Oh, I hate it.
I hate it.
I guess I'm going to have to do improv.
Yeah.
I hate it.
So Louie used to write.
Yeah, that's right.
He's probably one of the best joke writers.
I have a better story, dude.
Remember when we were on the sitcom together?
Oh my God.
This is crazy.
I hate it.
This is crazy.
This is PTSD.
This is my favorite Bobby story.
Go ahead.
In the early aughts.
You were a regular on the sitcom too.
I was on Mad TV.
Okay, but no, no, this is not that.
We were on a thing called used car smell.
Yeah, new car smell.
New car smell.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
The guys who did it were really cool.
They wanted comics on it.
I fucked them.
Fuck them.
Wait, hold on.
No, no, I want to get into it.
Okay, but hold on.
It was you, me, and Jimmy Schubert.
Yes.
And I'm not an actor.
Totally not an actor.
And they kept giving me these long, like, setups for the regular people to get
the punchline.
And I'm like, what the?
I can't.
I can't do.
I can't.
You know, and I wanted to like Red Fox it and like write it on the walls and
stuff.
But anyway, yeah.
I'm not even on the thing, right?
Brooke Shields?
No, see, I thought you were like a special guest or something.
No, no, no.
I was a real-
Brooke Shields was in it.
The guy, the lead guy is like a great actor.
And he was like rolling his eyes every time I opened my mouth.
What's his name over there?
But he was like a really good actor.
Oh, Christopher McDonald?
Yeah.
I was supposed to be a fucking series regular.
He's like A+.
A legit actor.
Anyway, you and I, hold on a second.
You and I and Jimmy, we're all going into our scenes and then we'd be smoking
outside safe.
Yeah.
And every time, I believe this was like on the warm up or whatever it is, the
dry run through
or something, we'd all run out and say the same thing.
I can't act.
I can't believe they're going to fire me.
I'm getting my stuff now because they're going to fire me by lunch.
I'm out of here.
Yeah.
And I was like, when you said that, and then I felt like so much better.
I was like, oh, great.
I'm not the only non-actor here.
Yeah.
But you were killing it.
And then it went on.
And then finally, we were doing it in front of a crowd.
You know that?
Like we were in front of a crowd.
And then the real actors, they were like stumbling on the lines.
But we were rocking it because we were like totally whoring it up to the crowd.
Like, I don't know.
Whatever you say, JJ.
You know, like we were totally succumbing.
Yeah, yeah.
Then Mitch Hedberg died.
A lot happened in that week.
It was a big week.
I'm not kidding.
Was that the week?
That was the week.
Oh, my God.
Wow.
Look at David Walton.
There it is.
New car smell.
Yeah.
Put it up full screen.
Let me see.
This is the full pilot.
Can you imagine, Bobby, if that went?
Can you imagine?
We'd be retired now.
I would've been fired.
Look at Dave.
No, no.
Oh, there he is.
Look at that.
Awesome.
I will say, it's weird to not see you in all black.
I love it.
And that look is still really in, you know?
Yeah.
Mostly in the Middle East.
How come dressed up?
Somehow dressed up, you look sleazier.
It really does.
I hate it.
Well, can I tell you my experience on that real quick?
Brooke Shields, by the way, she's very cool.
She was very cool.
I hated her.
Why?
I fucking hated her.
I like her.
No, I don't give a fuck.
Get out of your podcast.
Oh, wait.
I have to leave.
Wait, what did you not like about her?
Am I edited out of that thing?
Yeah, I can't find you.
You can't find me.
Look at me lurking in the back.
Dude, you're such a good lurker though.
What's going on over there?
Yeah.
No, I had to go there because I was overacting so much.
They had to push me back.
They had to push me way back.
Can't even stand naturally.
You're standing in a weird way.
That's a Meisner I'm using.
You can't find me in there, right?
No.
Well, you think they scrubbed you?
Yeah.
They cut me out.
So Fox calls me and they go,
there's a show called New Car Smell.
We want you in it.
And I go, okay.
And then they go,
but the Cullen brothers don't want you in it.
What?
The guys who made the show.
Oh, that was their names.
Yeah, the Cullen brothers.
Not the Coen brothers.
The Cullen brothers.
Cullen brothers.
Right.
It doesn't seem like a Cullen brothers.
I'm glad you caught that, Louie.
I thought it was the Coen brothers too.
So then they go,
but they want Getty Wananabe.
Oh yeah.
Long duck dong.
Yeah.
He's great.
He is.
Objectively.
He's great.
I would hire him over you.
No, no, no, no.
100%.
Let me ask you, friend.
Yeah.
If you were a show runner, right?
Yeah.
You pick him before me?
100%.
I wouldn't even think about it.
Yeah.
So you were the backup.
Basically.
Right.
So they forced me in.
And Rob Cullen would pull me aside and go,
listen, man.
You got to learn how to act.
Oh my God.
I swear to God.
I can't believe that.
Am I in the pilot?
They cut me out of it, Dave.
I thought you did a great job.
Oh, thank you so much.
Honestly.
I can't believe he would say that.
That would ruin your confidence.
It did.
Yeah.
It sure did.
So he was basically psyching you out.
Psyching me out.
And then like, I had two pages of dialogue.
It's not worth watching even for Bobby Lee fans.
It's a terrible show.
Should have never been made.
It's a waste of time, money and talent.
Yeah.
Did you just put that in there?
Yeah, he just wrote that.
I didn't type that.
Wait, go back to the pilot and scrub through it.
He's got to be in there.
I want to see the image.
Go back to the pilot.
I'm not in it, dude.
But my point is, I had two pages of dialogue.
And by the pilot, I had one line.
That's almost impossible.
I had one line.
It's a restaurant scene.
Anyway, and it was the worst human experience of my life.
What did Brooke Shields do?
And I've seen Rob a couple of times since then.
I wouldn't even look at him.
Really?
Yeah, yeah.
I fucked that guy.
That show business.
What did Brooke Shields do to you that you're so negative about?
Well, because the show owners didn't want me, you could feel it.
And so I was at craft 