Name: Who's the Better Assassin, Andrew or Bobby?
Uploaded: 2024-04-13T16:00:48.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Who's the Better Assassin, Andrew or Bobby?' from Bad Friends Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-04-13. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Who's the Better Assassin, Andrew or Bobby?' from Bad Friends Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-04-13. Transcript available.

what about do you exercise yeah i do oh what
i think that's a little what do you do i think it's a little personal i'm sorry
my bad my bad
no no i'm gonna you do the i just had my um my shoulder operated on and that
was like uh six
months ago and then you have to ease your way back in okay so uh i do like a
little hotel workout
but this is the guy really he knows he actually goes to the hotel gym which i
don't like to do
he does that he's actually i can see that i love it yeah yeah you do it keeps
me kind of saying a
little sane yeah especially because it it's like uh i like the scheduling of it
all because if i say
i'm gonna go get coffee and write and read and hang for a minute then i'll go
make sure i just go to
the gym from this time to this time then i feel like i'm good to not yeah you
know what i mean i
feel like it frees me up in some weird way i i can't sleep if i don't actually
do some kind of
exercise i got some kind of crazy i'll go i'll go sometimes on the road i'll go
for super super
late night walks i'll just walk for a while and i'll get tired yeah i'll just
think it out put
stuff down on my phone and then i'll be exhausted by the time i get home i like
to walk as well
yeah love it what when we're on the road i'll wake up and then i'll go to the
lobby and he's already
had a full day full day he's got golf clubs you know he's running i mean he's
got all kinds of
meetings he had and i'm literally just like i'm just like what what what day is
it and i just feel
like oh i started a small business by the time but it's like um like will you
just wake up at eight
in the morning it's like seven o'clock every day seven wait like when you're on
the road what time
do you wake up i know i don't really sleep all the roads i i keep falling
asleep in my clothes
which do you really because i there's something about like you put that hotel
tv on and it's
always like movies like oh my god lord of the rings the trilogy and i'll be
like i'll just watch a few
minutes and it's like the whole thing goes and i'll just wake up my clothes and
i'll run downstairs to
smoke so i'd say the majority of my action on hotels is going out to smoke
coming back in uh reassuring
the desk guy out front that i'm not um you know a threat you know and then i'd
like to walk that's
what i do and you know i i think um especially if you're like it's rare to be
in a downtown now
it's usually all these clubs are out out of town so you're like walking on
highways you're going you
know like all these weird things but when you're downtown there's a lot to do
so or at least walk
around so that i try and do do you try to get hotels with balconies so you can
smoke in the
balcony you can't do that they don't want you to do that oh really yeah every
uh every fun thing
about smoking has been it's gone even in vegas they don't they there's very few
smoking hotels now
it's funny there's a hotel we're playing in vegas and there's a hotel right
near us that is part of
the chain of hotels that they own and one of them is uh non-smoking and non-gambling
and it's like
right off the strip wow who's that for it's called area or aria what is it aria
right yeah what is it
an amish it's so strange though it's non-smoking non-gambling it's not it's
right is it's not a
casino or is it a hotel just a hotel oh wow which is right next to where we're
playing it was weird
because they talked to us about that they were like do you want to stay at this
this or whatever
what do you want to stay there no why because i want smoking and gambling
that's fucking las vegas isn't it don't they have a lot of clubs there in the
corner though man
what's that i just don't they have like nightclubs and stuff there isn't like
it's still like
no dancing no dancing no it's amish yeah footloof and the lights that are an
illusion it's actually
there is no lights that's cgi no that's just the the brightness of the people
in there we're such
good people hey great i would live there i mean i i if i like vegas second city
i would probably
live there really let's move i'm with you buddy yeah yeah let's do it they got
great restaurants
now they do yeah 24 hours 24 hours yeah you were talking about the access save
a couple of bucks
on taxes really yeah nevada no state tax yeah nicholas cage oh why we gotta go
nikki lives there
you know yeah nikki's there that would be and paulie shore paulie's back now
there's a lot
of guys we know that live there yeah yeah yeah and then you'd stage time what's
that stage time
doesn't reagan live there now brian reagan yeah reagan there's a move there
yeah yeah but there's
that club wise guys have you been there no it was great really it was the one
like off the strip it's
like oh like uh it was in the strip mall and i'm telling you like it was so
much fun like uh jeff
ross was in town so he came by did shows with me and wow it was just uh the
locals they get it you
know like talk about a more jaded crowd like you know they like live with these
cirque de soleil people
so it's like when they yeah you know and it's also like pretty pretty uh big
coin out there to go to
see any show it's so expensive so yeah like comedy is pretty reasonable on that
level but like amphitheater
style not so much what's the room seat probably about 400 oh wow that's great
yeah i want to play
you would kill it yeah i'll play there let's do a little sneaky you do let's do
a little sneaky one
nighter there yeah let's do a sneaky white that'll be fun yeah yeah no sneaky
white white people are
sneaky i'm sure you've never seen the movies that's oppenheim that's not sneaky
sneaky that's not the
pearl harbor was sneaky but what they did sneaky sneaky sneaky and then bum bum
they all die
put a japanese person in that movie man no what in oppenheimer yeah it's
already over
what do you mean they already it's done we need to do it again well oppenheimer
2 man
well you were the one you wanted more black people in black panther and yeah i
did
limit what kind of too small for too small he wants more bigger the whole
country more he wants more
look at oh my god there's a documentary on um i've never talked about this on hbo
about
oh my god what about what about fucking the hiroshima nagasaki oh right yeah
and then um
the people so people ran into like they had these vats of water this is the fun
part of the show
yeah it took a turn yeah you're gonna love you know you know when the bombs hit
and you have you
heard of black rain yeah no what is it that's the radiation coming down with
the soot and all kind
of stuff yeah yeah when the bomb that's the actual material stuff that goes up
off the initial
yeah but because people got so thirsty they drank it chemical no yeah and then
well with the nuclear explosion they have they had uh shadows of people that
would just melted
actually into the uh sidewalk sidewalk yeah yeah cement why'd you wink at me
just now you winked
right back at me i know you know why i winked at you we love it that was that
was actually a cool
movie that was uh what's his name michael yeah i like that oh yeah black rain
brockle rain
could you ever could you ever be like an action person
movie guy that's actually the best because like there's very few lines for
people like us like
watch out you're fun you're being
bobby would be great in action movie thank you so much louis two days ago i got
offered one
yeah what is the lead of a fucking action movie yeah what is it it's a doppelganger
where i'm a
doppelganger that's great you gotta say the word first
yeah you're a boggle ganger a doppelganger quite frankly i think i'd be a good
assassin i do think
you would be a great assassin my friend number one i don't sleep that's right
right and i'm very
focused like when i'm playing stardew valley it's a farming simulation game i'm
sorry yeah for his
ancestors for my ancestors yeah i'm very focused and when that's why i'm good
at video games
is because i i like grinding so i'm very good at like noticing things would a
scope be hard for
you to look through though i'd get a different one more justice my eyes yeah
and i i think i could
sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit put your arm put your arm right up can you
hold your arm
steady put your arm straight forward why just straight out you're gonna shame
me no how steady
is your hand that's the whole big thing about snipers oh bro oh yeah steady
hand oh fuck yeah steady
hand look at that this is great that's shaking you do yours shaking no let's
not look at it
that's pretty good you guys are both pretty good i think you can both be sick
thanks it looks like
it looks like it looks like you both were hiling a young hitler hey little guy
keep it up yeah
keep it up young hitler coming soon one day you will be great i'm sorry to
funny our way out of that
yeah oh that was good that was during the 92 la yeah that yeah yeah good old
days do you remember
that yeah yeah i was here the koreans were yes up on the fucking storm oh yeah
fighting look at him
laughing oh my god can i shut the block up okay yeah they lose i kill you guys