Name: Black Out at Steve Buscemi's | Bad Friends Clips
Uploaded: 2024-05-04T16:00:24.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Black Out at Steve Buscemi's | Bad Friends Clips' from Bad Friends Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-05-04. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Black Out at Steve Buscemi's | Bad Friends Clips' from Bad Friends Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-05-04. Transcript available.

So here I was, I was down in Australia shooting, shooting that, that movie and
we were out.
I'm going to say it.
Well, it says, come on.
Yeah.
Well, we're out.
I was at, we're, this is too many names, but we were at Zac Efron's house and
we were drinking
and hanging out.
And then Pete Fairley, the director calls and goes, Hey, do you want to go to
Russell
Crowe's house?
And immediately I was like, yeah, what the f***?
Of course I want to go to.
But there's a little bit of social anxiety come up, even a tad bit of like, don't
blow
it in front of Russell Crowe.
Even though I know you've been around everybody.
No, because I, we were with so many people.
I knew it wasn't a small get together.
There were already people at his house.
So it made me feel comfortable in that.
If it was just us, I'd be a little f***ed up about it.
Right.
I'd be like, I don't want to go to Gladiator's house.
Right.
So he's like, yeah, dude, he's got a great crib.
He's going to have us over.
So we're drinking and, and I'm getting a little stony and we show up to the Gladiator's
house
and it's exactly the way you think it would be.
It's f***ing beautiful.
I mean, beautiful.
On the water and everything.
Yeah.
Like we don't, I don't deserve to be there.
Right.
You know, I took my shoes off and then one of the guys was like, put your shoes
back on.
I thought we were, I took my shoes off because I thought, don't you take your
shoes off?
I mean, you people, don't you take your shoes off?
Uh, yeah.
I, yeah, I would put my, when I go to people's houses, I take my shoes off.
Well, I always, because my family's Puerto Rican, I take my shoes off, but I
always have
a backup pair of chancletas.
He's a, he's a legendary actor, right?
A-list.
A-list legendary.
Legend.
If I was walking to like, um, Robert De Niro's house, I'd be very aware about
not touching
things.
I wouldn't go.
I wouldn't probably go.
I'd blow it.
But my point is that there are some people like that.
And then there's some people who are like, ah, f*** it.
I'm going to, I'm going to throw the glass down.
Yeah.
So who, who would be like Steve Buscemi?
Would you be nervous going to his house?
No, he lives in a house.
I know, right?
He would live in a condo or something, right?
Yeah.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Buscemi, Buscemi lives in some kind of weird shed.
I would be, I would go to that one for sure.
Buscemi, yes.
Yeah, yeah.
And staring his teeth on.
Goldbloom, I'd want to see Goldbloom.
Oh, yeah, yeah, that'd be fun.
I'd want to see where he lives.
I'd want to see where Tom Cruise lives.
I'd want to see where he lives.
Really?
You wouldn't?
Would you go to his party?
I would go to Tom Cruise's party.
Yeah, yeah.
I would 100% go to Tom Cruise's party.
Hey, what's up, man?
You got to take off all your clothes before you come in.
Sure.
Leave your shoes on, but take your clothes off.
They say he knows everybody's name.
He remembers everybody's name, Tom Cruise.
That's supposedly what it is.
That's my house on Staten Island.
Dude.
I would go to one Tom Cruise's party,
but you wouldn't make it out.
Right.
You'd have to stay.
Right.
That's what I've heard.
They'd stay.
Once you go in, you don't come out.
Yeah.
Well.
You know, get out.
He does get in.
Get in.
Get in.
Did I ever tell you my Phil Collins story
when I met Phil Collins?
No.
No.
I told the story.
I thought I told it here.
Maybe I didn't.
It's on one of my specials.
So I get to go.
I get invited to the Knicks game, right?
This is like 2016.
So it was Easter Sunday,
and the Knicks and Philadelphia 76ers
were the bottom of the league.
They were the last place NBA teams.
So nobody wanted to go on Easter Sunday
and sit courtside at the Knicks game.
I had never gotten a call.
I knew some people at MSG,
but I had never gotten the call
to sit courtside.
So they call me the morning of.
They're like, listen,
we got two empty seats.
You can sit courtside, okay?
Bring somebody.
Don't talk to anybody, okay?
This is, you know,
Madison Square Garden.
Don't talk to anybody.
Don't talk to anybody.
They said there probably will be a couple.
They said we know there are a couple
of other big celebrities
that are going to be sitting around you guys.
Don't acknowledge them.
Don't talk to them like,
you know,
we're giving you this opportunity,
you know,
for whatever.
But it was because it was Easter Sunday
and it was the last place teams
and people didn't want to go.
So I call my dad.
So my father's like 100% I'm in,
you know,
we used to sit in the upper,
you know,
rafters or whatever.
So we go and we sit down
and my dad immediately start,
I was sitting here,
my dad was in the middle
and then there was famous guy
sitting next to him
and my dad immediately starts talking
to this guy.
Just immediately starts talking to him,
chatting him up,
talking about crazy shit,
you know?
And I don't,
I swear to God,
I didn't even look over
to see who it was
because I was like wildly embarrassed
but I'm not going to tell my dad
not to say anything.
So I hear my dad telling this guy
that his son's a comedian.
He's talking and my dad goes,
Chris,
where are you again next weekend?
I might,
this guy might come to show,
I swear to Christ,
I was performing
at Bananas Comedy Club.
I've been there.
It's inside of Holland Express
in Hasbrook Heights, New Jersey.
I've done it.
It's off the side of Route 17.
Yeah.
So it wasn't even remotely close
to being sold out.
Like I had,
I had sold like 100 tickets
over, you know,
the course of a weekend.
Is that the old Jewish couple
that own it?
Yes.
Yeah.
After you're done,
I got to tell you something.
Yeah.
Okay.
So I'm like,
Bananas Comedy Club.
He goes,
yeah.
So I said,
you know,
don't,
Bananas Comedy Club,
Dad,
but I said,
we're not supposed
to be talking to these people.
Like,
just let's watch the game.
And I hear my dad immediately go,
yeah,
Bananas Comedy Club.
That's where it'll be.
If you're in New York,
you know,
come through.
And then I'm like,
okay.
So my dad,
you know,
he's talking,
whatever.
He had Easter candy.
Okay.
The guy,
my dad was talking to him,
Easter candy.
And he's giving my dad
Easter candy.
And I'm like,
and my dad's like,
you want a Cadbury?
What do you want?
I was like,
I don't want any candy.
Just trying to watch the game.
So they put,
they put Phil,
my father was talking
to Phil Collins.
He had no idea.
He had no idea who Phil,
he has no idea
who Phil Collins is,
doesn't know anything.
They put Phil Collins
up on the Jumbotron.
Kiss cam with your dad?
No.
They put him up
on the Jumbotron.
Yeah.
And they,
I've never seen this.
They play,
you know,
normally they just
throw a picture up
or whatever.
Right.
They play,
coming in the air tonight,
doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo.
And I've never seen this
in Madison Square Garden
during a live game,
you know,
during a timeout,
they put the lights down.
No.
And then put this guy
in the Jumbotron
and he got a standing ovation
because he's Phil Collins.
Okay.
Yeah.
And my dad turns to me
and goes,
who the fuck is he?
And I go,
dad,
that's Phil Collins.
Yeah, yeah.
Within five seconds
of the lights coming down,
I have my head down.
I'm like,
oh,
that was pretty cool.
Yeah.
I see the people
walking with the cameras
and I see their shoes
stop right in front of me.
Wow.
And they take the camera
and the lady comes over.
I swear to Christ,
the lady from the Knicks staff
comes over.
She goes,
Chris,
does the lock,
does the lock,
I said to Stefano,
she goes,
you're up next.
I said,
what do you mean?
She goes,
we're going to put you
on the Jumbotron.
Just wave.
It'll be great.
They put me on the Jumbotron.
I swear to Christ,
they put me on the Jumbotron.
I have video footage of this.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
They put me on the Jumbotron.
Absolute pin drop silence.
I swear to Christ,
nobody's saying anything.
I swear to Christ,
and this is not a bit.
I swear to Christ,
the only thing I feel
is my father's hand
rubbing my back.
And he's going,
it's going to be all right,
Chris.
It's going to be all right.
And then I swear to Christ,
I'm getting my back rubbed
by my dad.
Yeah.
As soon as it's over,
all of a sudden,
a hand reaches across.
It's Phil Collins
with a bag of Easter candy.
A bag of Cadbury eggs.
And he goes,
and he goes,
it's going to be all right.
That's what he said.
Oh, really?
I swear to Christ.
But then my dad,
so that was like
a horrific experience.
But then because of the bomb
and all that,
and my dad has just got
like that gift again,
Phil Collins like loved my dad.
Like they were talking,
he fucking loved my dad.
Wow.
Then he started asking me,
he's like,
oh, so you do comedy?
And I said,
yeah, you know,
like trying whatever.
And he was like,
well, you know,
if they're putting you up there,
they must think you have potential.
So just keep going.
Wow.
Did the people know though
who you were then?
Maybe because you're a New York guy,
no, or?
No, no.
Now, no, no,
not at all.
No, no, no.
Because you're a New York guy.
No, there's nine million people.
You're a New York guy.
They know you.
Yeah, no, no, they did not.
They did not.
And it was, it was,
yeah, it was wild.
Tell me about the old Jewish company,
family at Go Bananas.
Oh, I didn't forget it.
Why?
I was going to top that story, man.
That story was so good.
It was a good story.
Phil fucking Collins.
Phil Collins, bro.
But it was, it was, you know.
I can feel it.
Coming in the edge of night.
Edge of night?
I'm just copying what you said, bud.
Okay.
All right.
Okay.
Oh, I'm just copying what you said, bud.
Oh, I'm just copying what you said.
Oh, I'm just copying what you said, bud.
Oh, I'm just copying what you said, bud.
Oh, I'm just copying what you said, bud.
Oh, I'm just copying what you said, bud.
Oh, I'm just copying what you said, bud.
Oh, I'm just copying what you said, bud.
Oh, I'm just copying what you said, bud.
Oh, I'm just copying what you said, bud.
Oh, I'm just copying what you said.
Oh, I'm just copying what you said, bud.