Name: MGK & Megan Fox SAVED Andrew Santino's Life!
Uploaded: 2024-06-06T16:00:15.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'MGK & Megan Fox SAVED Andrew Santino's Life!' from Bad Friends Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-06-06. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'MGK & Megan Fox SAVED Andrew Santino's Life!' from Bad Friends Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-06-06. Transcript available.

so i i wake up my mom sitting on the floor of the bathroom and i hear her like
shaking me
sir sir sir and then i hear another one going do we have a doctor do we have a
doctor on the plane
and i'm kind of coming too but i can't really come to because i'm like i feel
myself like mumbling
embarrassing yeah so embarrassing and i look down to my right and i have throw
up everywhere
i've thrown up all over myself like the amount of throw up is hilarious it's um
it's like a
fucking it's like a nickelodeon show it was like they turn on a faucet and she's
trying to help me
and then this guy shows up who's a doctor who's a psychiatrist but he was a
doctor and he's a
psychiatrist but he was a doctor but he was a psychiatrist he was a doctor but
he was trying
to help me out and she was talking to me and they were making me chug apple
juice and they were
trying to recount what happened and then he was like did you take drugs or did
somebody drug you
and i was like no no no no i'm sick something's wrong i have like a bug he
gives me narcan
narcan for hope for people that are having like an od opioid opioid od shoves
it up my nose and he's
like breathe and i was like i don't know if i'm comfortable with narcan and
then it gets up my
fucking schnoose had narcan on this on him that they gave him the first aid kit
it has narcan
so they goose me with narcan he stabs me to give me an ivy but the bag's not
working
because my positioning's weird imagine if you had the stuff remember when batman
the the batman
yeah at the end when he was finding the riddler and his army right and he pulls
out that green thing
anyway so he narcans me hits me with an ivy the ivy brit my vein fucking severs
so the thing is my
arms all bruised blood squirting every blood is all over the place i'm sitting
in piss i'm sitting
in piss and puke not my piss just airplane toilet bathroom piss it could be
good piss i doubt it you
don't know who's business i doubt it okay yeah if it was megan fox yeah if it
was megan fox if it was
megan fox it would have been fine oh yeah yeah i would have taken some home can
i get a can i get
a call a to-go cup so i'm sitting in piss and puke all over me and then mgk
comes walking up oh here we
go this is how cool of a guy this guy is i'm so embarrassed i'm sitting there i'm
slunched in a
in the airport bathroom oh my god in the airplane bathroom and he goes yo andrew
you okay do you want
some apple juice or orange juice and he's got like both like he bought it from
the store and i go i'm
literally like my neck is craned against the and i go oh thanks mgk very nice
of you man
it's so good i'm craned against the sink i'm tucked against the sink it's so
good and he he goes okay
bro and then he walks away and the flight attendant's like do you want your
phone do you want to call
somebody because i'm kind of like they're giving me oxygen because my my blood
left my oxygen level is
super low because i passed out wow they take my vitals and she goes does he
know your family
uh and i go we just met she goes you guys seem like close friends and i was
like
here we go he's just being very nice well yeah you know mgk
uh no so then he comes back like five minutes later they've got me hooked up to
an oxygen tank to level my
to get my levels right and he's got this sweater in his hand this is his
sweater this is mgk sweater
he's got it balled up in his hand and he sees that i'm soiled and he and he
goes yo do you want
my sweater because i'd taken my sweater off because they were like take your
sweater off we need to like
get you know we need to be able to take your blood pressure so i take i take my
sweater off he could
tell i'm in like a shitty old bed you know like a night shirt or something and
he goes uh do you want
my sweater and i said no dude i'm gonna get it's got i puke and fucking and he
goes i don't give a
fuck and he throws it to me and he goes keep that shit dude i don't give a fuck
he's like he's like
get warm and i almost started crying i was like mgk like he like he threw it to
a kid at a children's
hospital thanks mgk so he gave me a sweater like a fucking prince he doesn't
even wash that
why would i wash this i didn't get anything on it it smells it's bad anyway no
i we wash it when i got
home no no yeah i did well i i didn't so this was worse than the earthquake concussion
in the bathroom
oh my god dude i'm telling you right now that was a good one pretty close that
was just so then that
was very very very provocative so i'll finish it okay i get up out of my day
like can you sit in your
seat at this point i'm fine yeah i can sit in my seat i'm woozy i'm texting my
fucking wife i'm like
you need to pick me up i cancel my car because i was like i can't ride in a car
because i'm still
fucked up i get back in my seat i turn to mgk and i just go sorry man thank you
you're a real one he
goes i'm just glad that you're good and i was like thanks and then i just
couldn't look at any i just
didn't want to look at anybody i was so embarrassed you know and i get off the
plane or i we and then
they say everyone has to stop so the emts can come get me i said for my own
embarrassment
can i just get off the plane i can walk i'll meet them in the jet bridge if you
can walk yeah i grab
my shit i sprint up the jet bridge i throw this hoodie over my head and i sit
in the corner as far
as i can let the fucking paramedics do my vitals and take care because they
have to check you out when
you land they're doing the vitals i'm texting i'm getting bing bing bing bing bing
text are you dead
did you od you're dead are you dead yeah people were hit someone texted from
the flight jesse and
carlos and said santino od'd on my plane they were saying i fucking overdosed
on the flight oh they
don't have the information then tmz is calling my agents you yeah i pick up why
i love them no
they're my friends they want to know what's going on of course i get my wife
picks me up we make it
at 5 30 p.m we're sitting in rush hour traffic holy shit and i'm shaking in the
front seat
because i can't hold it in we get to my front lawn my hand to god i held out
the moment i open the car
door my neighbor just like hey andrew clipping his fucking head i project out
of my dog in the window
i'm holding my asshole oh and for the next four days i know i lost nine pounds
yeah i was on the toilet
spraying out of my butt i've never had this kind of it was water every time i
sat
water i had to go to the fucking doctor twice i know because i was like dude
something's wrong
bro and my doctor was like where'd you come from where are you going i said nashville
abu dhabi he
goes no no he's like you naturally already you did it already yeah he was like
he's like he said no to
that no he he goes go back in time and change it oh yeah no he was like no more
he's like you can't
travel dude he's like you cannot be he's like you need to take a break your
body he's like even if i
give you he's like you shouldn't be traveling so it took me four days i called
i called everyone a
million times to say i'm sorry took me four days of losing nine pounds you know
we were so worried
but now i'm a cutesy pootsy now i'm a little pinup girl yeah now i'm a little
skinny pinup girl
and i finally feel better you know how you look like philadelphia dude yeah
yeah i mean you look you
look when i just and that's the last time i'll party with magic johnson you
know what magic
that's enough wow it was a crazy story incredible so shout out to mgk for the
sweater that was very so we want to apologize to abu dhabi sorry about that
guys who do guys sorry
about that guys abu dhabi abu dhabi and i know you guys are mad but there's
nothing we can do there's
no way we're going to put our boy in jeopardy i was not allowed to fly i mean
what what's going
on did we get something yeah so we got something let's see what we got give it
to me yeah this is
straight from uh uae oh no oh no is this real yeah yeah this is bad bobby we're
wanted
dead or alive i can read it who made that wanted by the united arab emirates
andrew santino no call no show no call no show being stupid american
disrespectful behavior show
your anus to anyone with anyone with eyes cancellation norfolk virginia appears
in 2023 don't turn off less
successful podcast to focus all your energy on the ones people are actually
watching sexual harassment
in the workplace no giving carlos to the fbi no giving fancy b to ice wow wow
anyway uh thank you
thank you to the fine people of delta airlines for being a bad friend and
taking care of me i really
appreciate it thank you shout out dr warren down in orange county thanks thanks
for your help dr warren
thank you and delta you