Name: Famous Asians Party & Bobby's HILARIOUS Reaction
Uploaded: 2024-06-21T16:00:51.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Famous Asians Party & Bobby's HILARIOUS Reaction' from Bad Friends Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-06-21. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Famous Asians Party & Bobby's HILARIOUS Reaction' from Bad Friends Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-06-21. Transcript available.

- This guy.
- I'm sick.
- Remember when he got all--
- I don't feel good.
- Remember when he got emotional
about the Netflix dinner he didn't get invited to?
And last night he comes in with Margaret.
He's like, "How good was that dinner?"
They went to like an Asian inclusion dinner or whatever,
and it was all the famous Asians,
and he got invited to that, didn't you?
And you bragged about it.
All the famous Asians that were there.
Name the famous Asians that were there.
Go ahead.
- Oh, the famous Asians?
- Name 'em all.
- Okay, that guy from--
- Ali Wong.
- No, no, no, no, she wasn't there.
I'm gonna tell you right now.
- She wasn't?
- I'm gonna tell you right now, right?
- Who was there?
- The dude from Revenge of the Nerds, that Asian.
What the, did he ride the bikes?
- Oh, I love that guy.
- You don't even know his name, dude.
- Oh, who cares?
- Yeah, yeah.
The guy that invented like the shape of the dumpling.
- Oh, really?
- Yeah, yeah.
You didn't actually, the ingredients know,
but the shape?
- He based it off of you.
- Yeah, so it wasn't a big--
- Who was there?
- It wasn't a dinner, dude.
- You're lying.
There was a famous Asian dinner, and he went,
and they talked about it all night last night.
- There's Asian dinners all the time that are famous,
but no one gives a about those things.
I've always been invited to those things, all right?
- Who throws?
- I'm the King Ching Chong, dude.
I paved the way for all the other Ching Chong.
- King Ching Chong!
- They, they, they, they, they, they, they, they,
they always invite me.
- Who threw the party?
Is that someone's house?
- No, it was at a gigantic thing, dinner thing,
outside downtown.
- Who throws it?
- I have to look it up, it was an organization.
I forgot what it was.
- What is it called, AAPI?
Is it Asian?
- No, no, no, there was, there was a, ugh.
- Is it Asian American Pacific Island?
- No, it's a, no, it's not that.
It's, hold on.
- Is that what it's called?
- Excellence?
- No, it's not the Asians, it's excellence.
Hold on, hold on, hold on.
- That's May 1st to May 31st.
Oh, we're almost out of it then.
- No, no, hold on.
- Asian, so AAPI, that's,
that's Asian American Pacific Islander heritage.
- What was the whole month of May?
- The dinner, the dinner call.
They give black people February and it's 28 days
and these guys get 31 days, that's insane.
These Asians, dude, that's out of control.
Although there are significantly more of them.
That's true.
- Yeah, so I always go to that, so who was there?
- Who was there?
- John Cho, Steven Yeun, Michelle Yao.
- Huge, huge, huge.
- All the Olympics, the guys, the gold,
the Chinese guy, that's great, the Olympics, the skateboard.
- Which team, the basketball team?
The Olympic men's basketball team?
- None of them, huh?
- Yeah, none of them.
- Fencing?
- Guys, you know, it's so funny what you guys are doing.
- Archery?
- Look at the, look at us, ice skate.
Glorious, the movement.
- It's mostly Russians, ice skating.
- No, we have a Chinese guy, what's his name?
Nathan Chang, whatever?
- We talked about him, we got one.
- Yeah, he's so good.
Anyway, anyway.
- Yeah, Zun Yee.
- Zun Yee, that's on him.
- Zun Yee.
- Anyway, so they were there and then like.
- We bought a Zun Yee.
- Oh, you know, Asif Ali was there.
- Asif Ali.
- All right, this is the thing that bothered me last night.
Asif Ali, old friend of mine.
He also goes, "Oh yeah, and W. Kamau Bell."
I go, "He's black."
By the way, none of those guys are Asif Ali
that we're talking about.
- Yeah, why'd you pull that guy out?
- It's just another guy named him.
- W. Kamau Bell, that's it, first one.
- First one, yeah.
W. Kamau Bell was there and I said, "Why was he there?"
And Bobby said, "We invite blacks too."
That's what he said.
- We do.
We invite blacks and we invite some Hispanics
who have kind of Chinese eyes.
And then we also invite, we do.
You have to either get high.
If you're Mexican, you gotta be high.
- Yeah.
- There he is.
- There's Asif, we love him.
- He's so talented.
So anyway-
- But he's Indian, which is Asian.
- That is Asian.
- So it counts.
W. Kamau Bell, he's a black guy, right?
- Yeah, but he fucks with Asians.
- Everybody fucks with Asians.
- You don't fuck with Asians.
You ridicule and you oppress.
He builds us up.
- I've spent my life fucking with an Asian.
This has ruined my life.
So you got sick this morning, would you wake up sick?
You missed our call with Hulu.
- Yeah, I woke up and then I have to go
and do Logic's movie tomorrow, I'm dreading it.
But also, and then I had to do a lunch.
And there was a, I did a lunch with this guy.
He's like this guy, you know what I mean?
He's a historian guy.
He's pitching me something and he goes,
he goes, "You know about Genghis Khan?"
I go, "Yeah, I know, he's a guy, wanderer, right?
Chinese guy," or whatever.
And he's like, "No, no, no, this is what."
So he had a shaman, Genghis Khan, okay?
And Genghis Khan had gout.
- Makes, that lines up.
- Yeah, yeah.
And then the shaman goes, "The way you get rid of gout,"
I swear to God, he goes, "You gotta kill 40 children,
and then you gotta stomp on their organs."
- You've never read that?
Never read that.
- Yeah, yeah.
And so he did it, right?
And then it didn't work, so he tried it again.
He tried it twice.
- 80 kits?
- Yeah, yeah, he tried it down.
And then I was thinking, "God, I wish I was Genghis Khan's shaman."
- Yeah.
- "Clean my house."
That's how you get rid of gout.
- Twice.
- Twice.
- Yeah.
- I mean, you could have him do anything you want.
- So who was his, was this guy pitching you to play his shaman
in a movie or something?
- He wanted me to play the guts.
- Of the kids?
- Yeah, dude.
- Oh, you're good, that's good.
- I'm so good at guts, dude.
- Genghis Khan, how many people did he conquer?
What was his deal?
He had sex with like 1,000 people a day, something absurd?
- No, he didn't.
- No, that's what they said.
It was something insane like that.
Genghis Khan.
How many, how many, 4,000 different women.
- Holy moly.
- That's funny.
- Consensual.
- No.
- It has to be consensual.
- Yeah, sure.
- Consensual?
- Uh-huh.
- He just.
- By the way, he was alive in, what was the time period again?
He died in like, go up, go back a page.
- Yeah, 1227.
Yeah.
- Real consensual.
- Yeah.
- Nah, it's caveman era, bro.
- There were some woke people back then.
- In 1100?
- Yeah, dude.
- I doubt it.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Anyway, have you seen some of the photos of the Mongolians?
They had blue hair.
- Yeah, Pierce, that's true, yeah.
- Yeah, and they, they cosplayed.
- They were all trans.
- So let me ask you something, too.
- Got it out.
- I don't even know what's going on.
But let me say something, too.
- Tell me about this historian.
- Did you have a good time with him?
- The historian?
- Mm-hmm.
- Yeah, he did.
- Was it worth missing the Hulu call this morning
about an animated show?
- It wasn't that.
- It wasn't that?
- No.
- You were already, uh...
- Well, what happens is, I'm sorry, pal, my bud.
- Don't say sorry to me.
Say sorry to Hulu.
- They didn't care.
- They did.
- They didn't.
- First thing on the call, is Bobby gonna join?
- Yeah, what does that mean?
And then when they said, "Oh, he's not gonna join,"
what are they, "Oh, we gotta, we gotta,
we gotta cut this guy loose.
He's hard to deal with."
- I can't wait till it does happen.
- Yeah, what?
- I can't wait till, like, we just can't deal with Bobby.
I just, a little too...
- Really?
- Inconsiderate of all of our time.
- Dude, first of all, can I say something?
I forgot about it.
- I know you didn't.
This is a good thing.
- I reminded you last night.
At the show, I said, "I'll see you on the call tomorrow."
- Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
- No, I thought you meant--
- This is you, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
- I thought you meant this.
- I'll see you on the call?
Do you think this is a call?
- We're calling each other right now, but it's,
am I not calling you?
- Hello.
- Hello.
- Hi.
- There we go.
- Okay.
- I don't hear you like this.
I hear you through here.
- That's true.
- It's a call.
- How long is too long to wait for your coffee
at a coffee shop?
- No.
- Walked out.
- What, which one?
- I can't--
- I'm not gonna say it.
I can't put it.
- I know which one it is.
- It's a mom and pop thing.
I'm not gonna put them on blast.
If it was Starbucks, I'd fucking--
- If that new one, that's really good.
That I go to all the time.
- 20 minutes, I'm not kidding.
- Oh, my God.
- But isn't that the place they use the mushroom?
- Chaga?
- Yeah.
- I walked back in and I was like, "Excuse me,
did you guys, am I, am I in line?"
And the guy's like, "We have a lot of to-go orders, man."
I was like, "You got it."
- I left.
I paid for the coffee and I left.
- Wow, that's--
- I just was like, "What the fuck is, I don't wanna,
what am I gonna fight for the money?
I'm over it, it's over, I gotta go."
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- There's like 20 minutes, I'm not kidding.
Okay, if I'm not exaggerating, 16 minutes.
- Helly hole more like a moon.
- What's too long, isn't that too long?
- Listen to me, listen.
The other day, I went to Salt and Straw.
- Salt and Straw ice cream, my favorite.
- Right.
I waited probably 45 minutes to go in there.
- Well, that's 'cause they have a line every day.
- But I'll tell you what the problem is.
- And people need their fingers removed.
- Some, for sure.
- For this.
Sampling.
- Oh, yeah.
- Your fingers need to be removed.
- You know the Spaniard,
you know he tries all of them, doesn't he?
- Yeah.
- Pig.
- But Salt and Straw has six flavors that are just right.
And they have seasonal ones,
but it's like, take the gamble.
- You know when a guy goes,
"Can I get a sample of cookies and cream?"
I'm like, "Get fucked."
- You don't know what that tastes like?
- Fucking get, fucking get fucked.
- You don't know what cookies and cream tastes like.
Get the fuck out.
- Yeah.