Name: Sketch's Date w/ Bobby Lee
Uploaded: 2024-09-28T16:47:18.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Sketch's Date w/ Bobby Lee' from Bad Friends Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-09-28. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Sketch's Date w/ Bobby Lee' from Bad Friends Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-09-28. Transcript available.

- Are you seeing somebody now, Kylie?
- Seeing someone?
No, not specifically.
- Okay.
- I'm kind of just doing tryouts.
- Kind of like- - Oh, you got tryouts.
- Oh, right there.
- So when you go out on a date,
let's say I'm a girl.
Can we pretend?
- Yes, sir.
- Yeah, my name is Loop Loop.
- Oh, I love her.
- This is my favorite character.
- Why?
I've never been!
- I love Loop Loop.
- Yeah, I'm Loop Loop.
- Yeah, no.
- What are you doing?
I'm Loop Loop.
- Yeah, that's my Italian, yeah, yeah.
All right, I'm Loop Loop.
- Perfect.
- Hey, what's up, brother?
- Hey, hey, sister.
- Very good already.
- You're already sucking his dick.
- Where are we going?
- Where are we going?
- Yeah.
- Hey, let's just go straight to the crib.
- Whoa.
- Yeah, but it's 6:00 PM.
I haven't eaten.
I thought we were gonna have dinner.
- Okay, sushi.
- Okay, where, brother?
- Thailand.
- We're gonna go to Thailand?
- Whoa.
- Whoa.
- This guy's gonna fly you to Thailand?
- So now we're on a plane.
- That's probably the easiest way to get the play there.
- Whoa.
- So you're gonna fly all the way to Thailand to get sushi?
- Possibly.
- But you don't know any sushi places in LA or Texas?
- No, no.
Okay, fine, we're going to get some chicken or something.
- Oh, chicken.
- You gotta start off slow.
- Well, it was a downgrade.
- Yeah. - Yeah, yeah.
- Sushi to chicken. - We went from sushi to chicken.
- The way you dress, you know,
you look like you probably give it up pretty easy.
- Whoa. - Whoa.
- Wait, you're saying that I'm fat?
- No, I, no, it's, no, it's the small hands inside.
- Oh, I have a little dainty hand.
- No, I'm just kidding.
- Okay.
Okay, anyway, so what chicken place are, what's my name?
- Lupu?
- Lup, Lup, Lup.
- Lup, Lup.
- Yeah, yeah, it's Lup, Lup.
Don't forget it, mister.
- Yes, sir.
- So what chicken place are we going to?
- City chicken.
- Oh, city chicken.
- Is it good?
- Is it good?
- City chicken.
- City chicken, activate.
- Whoa.
- One of the best spots in LA.
- Really good.
So we go to city chicken and that one,
and then what do we, are we getting dessert
or are we going back to your crib?
- Back to the crib.
- Okay.
- I don't go on many dates.
I usually just.
- I know, that's why we're acting it out, dude.
I'm trying to help you.
I'm trying to fucking help you.
- Okay.
- This guy's the dating guru.
- Dude, I'm the dating fucking guru, dude.
- I'm trying to fuck.
Let's get this show on the road.
- I know, but you can't go right to fuck, dude.
- Hey.
- Yeah, yeah.
- I think he can.
- All right, so we're at your crib now.
We're at your crib, right?
Nice place.
Excuse me.
Why are you squinting?
- I'm trying to zoom in right now.
- Oh, you're zooming in.
Wait, for you to get long side, you have to zoom in?
- These, these, when they gave me these.
- Yeah, yeah.
- They gave me two different sides
and two different strengths.
- Yeah.
- Like, I didn't like that.
So it's just like, I can't really see that great,
but I just didn't feel like going back.
- He's zooming in.
- Oh, you're zooming in.
- Zooming in.
- And then, you know what?
I'm going to zoom into you too.
- Whoa.
- That's hot.
- I thought you were already zoomed in.
- I'm zooming in.
- Do I zoom?
- I'm so sorry.
I got COVID.
Sorry, I'm coughing.
I have COVID.
I feel doozy.
- Hey, look, that's the origin.
- Loop Loop brought it over.
- Wait, wait, wait.
You think I'm from Wuhan, China?
- A little bit of bat soup.
Take LuPu for some bat soup.
- Whoa, this is turning very QAnon and fucking racist.
- Hey, whoa.
- Whoa.
Anyway, so we're watching,
we want to watch a movie, cuddle up on the couch.
Sure.
- What do you want to watch?
- What do I want to watch?
- Excuse me?
- I thought we were going to fuck.
What are you?
- Okay.
You just want to fuck?
All right.
So I didn't bring any condoms.
Do you have any?
- No, sir.
- No, sir.
- No, ma'am.
- No Loop Loop.
- No, no, no Loop Loop.
All right, so you just want to raw dog it?
- Sure.
- He didn't even think about it.
- Yeah, sure.
- He went straight away.
- Wow, so that's your style.
- I've already got my booster and all that stuff.
I'm good.
- Oh, you're vaccinated.
- Yes, sir.
- Oh, that's cool.
- Yes, ma'am.
- Wow.
And these homies, who are these homies you're with?
- These guys?
- Yeah.
- That's my brother.
- The black guy's your brother?
- Yeah, that's my manager and my camera guy.
- Oh, that's cool, dude.
- Not that camera guy.
The new camera guy.
- The new camera guy.
- A new camera guy.
- Do you have any questions for my little friend?
- I'm really loving Loop Loop.
I got to tell you.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
- I'm losing my shit over here with her.
- Yeah, yeah.
Well, you love Loop Loop?
- I love Loop Loop.
- It's a pretty good character, right?
- Thank you so much.
- So you're single though, Sketch, huh?
- Yes, sir.
- You're running around having a good time?
- Actively, actively in play.
- Oh, good for you.
- Wow.
- Well, you're not on the apps though.
- Uh, not really.
- Can't use them.
- Can't really.
- Too famous?
- Uh, no, just not enough good pics.
- Ooh.
- Kinda gotta show up in person.
- Wait, now, do you get your girls from DMs?
- DMs and mostly just go to parties or just go out.
- Oh, a party.
- No, not that time.
Hey, a little Diddy party.
- Please don't go to those.
- Hey, party like a sketch party.
- Are you throwing parties at your house?
- No, so like, I live with banks right now.
And I mean, we just, I just go, I'll go places sometimes.
But mostly like, just out.
Like, I don't know, I'm trying to think of,
I usually just get addresses from people.
- Could you?
- Whether it's a place or like a restaurant or something.
- Yeah, yeah.
- Good for you.
- Well, you get addresses?
I don't, can you explain?
- He's young and successful and they tell him where to go.
- Oh.
- They say, come here, come party here.
Go there, go party there.
- And then when you party, do you drink?
- I drink, smoke a little bit.
- Weed?
- Mostly smoke.
- Some weed?
- Weed, yeah.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
You do molly?
- Oh, no.
- Okay.
- Have, have never.
- Never have.
- Ooh, interested?
- Have you take, have you taken molly?
- No, yeah.
- No, yeah.
- What's it, what's it do?
What's it like?
- Feels good.
- Put you back in that loop loop scenario.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
My wiener's tingling.
- What's up, brother?
I think that's the, that's another baby catchphrase.
- My wiener's tingling.
- My wiener's tingling.
Wow, that's a good one.
- You gotta add like a, when you add a hands on with it.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- That doubles the, doubles the chances of it.
- Oh.
- You gotta put an emote with what you're saying.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- Makes sense.
- Does your penis tingle often?
- Um, no, but it does burn sometimes.
- Okay.
- Uh-oh.
- Yeah.
- Uh-oh, hot dog.
- Do you know that's his catchphrase?
- I have one kidney, so sometimes it just comes out like pretty,
piss will come out pretty orange or something like that.
- Hmm.
- What happened to the other one?
- Um, born with one.
- You're only born with one?
- Born with one.
- I think someone, I think someone probably harvested.
- Somebody took it.
Where were you born?
- Uh, I was born in Arizona.
- Oh yeah, they take it out there.
Yeah, that's where they take it.
- Unfortunately.
- Phoenix?
- Phoenix.
- Wow.
- But you live in Texas now?
- Yes, sir.
- Yeah, yeah.
What city?
- I live in Houston.
- Oh, it's a good city.
- The big H.
- We love the big H.
- I love living in Houston.
- Yeah.
- Would you ever move to California?
You like it out here or no?
- I like it out here for like purposes like this,
but besides that, uh, I like living in Houston.
I've lived there my whole life, so I just,
it's just kind of the vibe.
- Yeah.
- That's where all your people are.
- Yes, sir.
- Yeah, I get that.
- How are you handling fame?
- Pretty, uh, I don't know.
I'd take everything like day at a time.
I never thought I'd like, I don't really care
to be on camera or stuff like that.
Like, it's pretty fun, but like.
- You seem very comfortable here.
- Yeah, no, like, I meant like, uh, like, I meant like, uh,
just like cameras and stuff, like always, I was never like,
I'd never like public speaking or anything like that.
- Well, we never learned public speaking.
We just do it.
- Yeah, we did.
- Yeah, we did.
- But I bet you, but, hey, but guy,
I bet you can do all kinds of public speaking.
- Yeah.
- I feel like, let's do a little test here.
- Do a, do a little.
- Let's do a Ted talk.
- Do a presidential debate.
Oh, would you like to do a presentation with President Carver here?
- Okay.
- And I'll be the CNN moderator.
- All right.
- All right.
- Okay, so, um.
- Well, unlike my opponent, I like.
- Excuse me, sir.
- Yeah?
- We just started.
- Oh, okay.
- And I have to, I have to do the introduction.
- Oh, sorry.
- So welcome CNN.
I'm Sally Stevens and I'm the moderator today and welcome.
And today is, um, the, the, um, Democratic nominee, President Carver.
- Right?
- Hello.
- And we have, um, the Republican nominee, um, a president, um,
what's your last name?
- Cox.
- Cox.
Anyway, let's get the, let's get, let's get the, I know it is.
Let's get the debate on the road, okay?
So, um, about immigration, what is your stance, President Carver?
- Well, loop loop.
I'm glad you asked.
- Fuck.
- Unlike my opponent, I, I like people of all color.
My opponent has said often that he does not like minorities.
It's kind of the stance he takes.
It's what he's talked about often.
It's on his shirts.
It's on his hats.
- Yeah.
- Um, and you know, I'm full and supportive.
- My opponent has a tiny cock.
He's got a baby dick.
- Okay.
Okay.
- Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
- A little too fast.
- You know what?
- What?
- That gets my vote.
- That gets my vote.
- That just got my vote.
- That got my vote.
- I just won three states down south, baby.
- Wow.
- Look at that.
- Woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo.