Name: Bobby Lee EMBARRASSED In Front of Maroon 5?!
Uploaded: 2024-11-15T18:35:00.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Bobby Lee EMBARRASSED In Front of Maroon 5?!' from Bad Friends Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-11-15. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Bobby Lee EMBARRASSED In Front of Maroon 5?!' from Bad Friends Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-11-15. Transcript available.

I can't believe you're not coming for my show tonight.
Yeah, I just have to do this thing, I think.
You know what?
I'll tell you why.
Okay.
I'll tell you why.
Let's get off this.
I'll tell you why.
It's because throughout my whole life,
I've been known not to go to these events.
Yeah, I'm not good at the socializations,
the social aspects of show business.
I've never been good at it.
I've been called aloof.
I've been called like he seemed weird.
You know what I mean?
I'm being real.
I mean, that's the thing that people say.
We're shocked.
Yeah, people go, I don't invite him because it's weird.
You know what I mean?
Why?
He just sits in a corner.
I don't really talk too much.
It's also I try too hard sometimes because I got to be cool, right?
So it's just like I'm not like I'll interject into a conversation
I shouldn't interject.
Right.
You know, I'll give you an example.
Last week we were in Vegas.
And after my show with Bert, I got invited to Maroon 5.
Great.
And, you know, we saw Maroon 5 and then backstage Adam wanted to say hi.
So I brought my friend John Park, dumbfounded.
And talk about embarrassing.
This guy tried so hard.
Like Adam brought up Korea and then John just stepped in.
Well, yeah, Korea, I'm legit in Korea, he says, right?
And eventually I had to go, Adam, I'm sorry.
He's trying too hard.
And I backed him out.
Wow.
Right.
I go, shut the fuck up, dude.
You're embarrassing.
You said that to him.
Yeah.
And then later he got mad.
He's like, you embarrassed me.
I don't know.
You embarrassed yourself.
But I understand how John was because that's what I'm like sometimes.
Are you good at parties?
What is he famous for in Korea?
Nothing.
That's what.
No, he was like, I know all the like legit restaurants.
Yeah.
Why would Maroon 5 care about that?
Exactly.
Yeah.
Bingo, dude.
Yeah.
They're like, I don't care what the hot restaurant is in Pyongyang.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
We don't care either.
Yeah.
Yeah, either anyone.
Yeah.
Right.
But, and I said, he likes you, John, just back up.
Yeah.
You're trying too hard.
Yeah.
And then Adam laughed at that.
Right.
And he thought I was ridiculing him.
Right.
Right.
But anyway, but the truth be known is I was a little nervous.
Because of being around him.
Just being around that whole situation.
Because, you know, you watch that show, it's like the highest level of.
Sure.
Production.
Yeah.
It's incredible, the sound.
Did they.
The choreography.
Okay, it's fine.
Hold on.
It's fine.
Yeah, it's fine.
That's what Germans invented the fart.
They did?
Yes.
Yeah, yeah.
I'm not good at parties, no.
I try to, like today I have a show.
And then after there's people coming to the show, you know, it's LA, the age as
well.
And I just, I want to run out the back door right after the show.
WME.
Oh, WME, okay.
Yeah, yeah.
So I want to run because I don't like the social interaction.
Because I can go on stage and do this all day for hours.
But when it's the small talk, I don't know how to do it.
I don't want to do it.
I get very, very, very uncomfortable.
Yeah, me too.
I'm not good at it.
Right.
And yeah, it's unnatural almost.
You were really going to town yesterday on that jalapeno cornbread and the brisket
and the mac and cheese.
You really-
Well, why would you?
Why would you?
You really just-
No, because he had stomach problems all night.
I heard him going to the bathroom all night.
Were you-
Did you really?
I heard one.
Could I be honest with you?
I didn't-
So I ate a couple of pieces and my stomach has an instinctual alert system.
Right?
Kareem's invented that.
Yeah, I know we did.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And it's sort of like a queef out of your butt.
You know what I mean?
It's not a fart.
You know what I mean?
But it's a queef out of your butt.
It's like this.
You go-
Yeah.
Yeah.
And my butt did that and I stopped eating it.
Smart.
It's my system going, there's something wrong.
And you didn't eat again for the rest of the night?
No, I did.
Oh.
I had pasta.
Right.
So you just completely-
I had carbonara pasta.
You ignored the system.
I did.
Yeah.
And I had a difficult night.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Sometimes you ignore the system.
Yeah.
But when you-
When you-
Did you keep eating?
Does your body have an alert system?
Sometimes it didn't with that.
Okay.
Yeah.
I have heartburn.
I woke up in one night.
You had heartburn, okay.
Yeah.
And then we ate-
And then we ate big Italian meal
just before we came in.
Then I fell asleep on Don's couch.
Oh, that's interesting.
So let me ask you about your experiences in LA.
Do you-
You don't like it?
LA?
Yeah.
I don't have a problem with LA at all,
but I am-
I am absolutely-
If you said,
Hey, Chris, your career will get twice as big.
You just have to go to LA more
or you just have to move to LA,
I would say I'd rather just stay where I'm at
and just be in New York.
Because I don't hate LA.
It's just my whole family and life
and me feeling at peace
is all in New York.
Sure, sure.
I like staying in the original 13 colonies.
Okay, okay.
That's what it is.
That's enough said and well put.
Yeah.
Yeah, I agree.
Yes.
Yeah, yeah.
I don't like it.
Like for me,
if you could tell me I will have a career
from Vermont to Georgia,
the original 13,
I would like to do that.
Really?
I don't like to go too far west.
This is way too far.
This is to me,
this is the Spanish.
This is not our country.
Our country,
what our founding fathers believed
was the 13 colonies.
And then Thomas Jefferson bought
the Louisiana Purchase.
He bought too much land.
Yeah, yeah.
That's not what we wanted.
That's not what was agreed upon.
So I like staying in the original 13.
So if we would have stayed
with the 13 colonies,
what would have happened
with the rest of the country,
you think?
Well, it would have been
like no man's land.
No, it would have stayed
with Spain and France.
And do you know Thomas Jefferson,
the actual president
of the United States
at this time,
when he bought
the Louisiana Purchase,
when they sent Lewis and Clark out
into that big blue west?
Thomas Jefferson,
this is why culture
and society is wild.
Thomas Jefferson,
who was the president,
the sitting president,
very smart inventor type guy,
he believed,
and they were not sure
if they were going
to encounter dinosaurs or not.
Really?
I swear to God.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
In like Ohio and all that,
they knew they were going
to encounter hostile
Native Americans,
but they also thought
there could be
a Tyrannosaurus Rex out there.
Wow.
Because they didn't have
any information.
Oh, right.
They were scared.
Yeah, right.
Of course.
But so that's what they thought,
that they thought
there were dinosaurs.
Interesting.
But see,
the original 13,
so from actually,
not even Vermont
was an original,
so from New Hampshire
up to Georgia,
that's my zone right there.
That's where I like
to sell tickets,
that's where I like to stay.
Yeah.
My family has fun there.
We feel close.
But don't you like the way
it's a little bit more
space in L.A.?
No.
You don't like that?
Space gives me anxiety.
When you give me space,
you give me places
for people to hide.
Ah.
I don't like that.
There are places
to hide in New York, no?
No,
but I know them all.
Oh,
you know the little cubby holes?
Yeah, I know them all.
Oh, I see.
Yes,
and I think that
for me out here,
things get a little weird out here.
You get a lot of serial killers out here.
You get a lot of people
just alone with their thoughts out here.
Things can move too slow.
Yeah.
There's a lot of isolation.
We're over here,
we're on top of each other.
Yeah.
And that in the moments
can be frustrating,
but that makes us feel
more connected as humans.
And I like it more
in the original 13.
Yeah,
because so does Sam.
Let's talk about the killer.
He was from New York.
Yeah,
so that's one you got me on.
No,
but that's only one really.
I can't think of any other ones.
Can you?
Yeah,
the Boston Strangler.
Yeah,
yeah,
he's a pretty good one.
But the son of Sam
got caught quickly,
no?
Or no?
Son of Sam.
Yeah.
So son of Sam.
He shot people.
He shot people.
And allegedly,
son of Sam,
they pinned it on him,
but he didn't do all the murders.
It was a cult of people
doing the murders.
Oh,
that's interesting tidbits.
Thank you for saying that.
Supposedly.
T.T. Jerry
was in prison with son of Sam
and told us that.
Wow.
But you would have to admit though,
the Midwestern
and the Northern serial killers
are the worst.
The worst.
Don't you think?
The Midwestern
and the Northern,
yeah.
Yeah,
yeah.
I don't,
well,
really the mid,
like Milwaukee on,
Jeffrey Dahmer,
John Wayne Casey,
they're doing an Ed Gein movie
right now.
Ted Bundy,
Ed Gein,
these are all like West,
West where expansion
is no good.
Manifest Destiny,
I don't like that.
I want the original 13,
that's all.
I think we should go back,
if the United States
wants any chance,
I say we get rid of everything
besides those original 13
and people come and move
to where,
to the East Coast.
We have the water there,
we have the weather there.
What do you think of Cal exit
or Texas exit?
I'm for it.
You're for states
getting removed
from the union.
Thank you so much for union
and just having their
independent own country.
Do it.
You think so?
Do it.
Because to me,
it's,
you know,
it's the East Coast
down in Georgia.
Oh,
so what you're saying to me
is that if
Washington,
Oregon,
and California
got off
and we were on
our own country
and then you did that
with the 13 colonies,
that there would be a war,
I think we'd be allies,
no?
We would be allies,
yeah.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah, we would be allies.
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah, because
we would,
yeah,
we would be allies.
Texas wouldn't be our ally.
Yeah.
I don't want Texas.
But I feel like our army
would be better than your army.
Which army are you in?
The Asian army?
No, no, no, no.
I'm in the California,
Oregon, Washington.
No, no, no.
Because somebody like Don,
who's from Georgia,
we have the deep south
in the 13 colonies.
They're the fighters.
Yeah, but we have MS-13.
That's true.
Yeah, but they're not,
but they're not,
they're not legal.
We still have them.
That's true.
Yeah, yeah.
We still have them.
Yeah.
Rather,
regardless,
I'd make them legal.
They'll work for you.
I'll make them legal, right?
And that's a pretty good army.
Here,
we throw out them first.
Look at that.
That guy, dude?
Oh, yeah,
I don't want to fuck with that guy, dude.
Yeah,
his tattoos are on his eyeballs.
Those guys are bad.
They're pretty bad.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Or good if they're listening.
Look at that hand gesture.
I can't even do that with my fingers.
I know.
I have arthritis.
Yeah,
I couldn't do it.
Yeah.
But I think,
I think,
yeah,
I think we should think more,
as Americans,
we should think more about
just going back to what
this was originally intended.
I don't think so.
It's never going to happen.
No.
Yeah, yeah.
I think it's fine the way it is.
I, you know,
I think that we're like
politically polarized in this country
like we've never seen.
But I think at the end of the day,
you know,
we'll be fine.
That's the thing is like,
what do you think this is any worse today
than it was in the French Revolution
when they cut the king and queen's heads off?
Like,
it's the same shit.
Just relax.
Everyone needs to just fucking relax.
That's what I'm saying.
They're living in the worst time
in American history
and they're like,
what?
Yeah.
All 400,000 soldiers died.
Yeah.
There's been a lot of points
in American history
that was worse.
Sure.
Yeah.
I mean,
the depression was terrible.
The Great Depression.
The great one.
Right.
And that's where jazz came out.
That's it.
That's where jazz came out.
And that's where,
yeah.
Yeah.
Can you name me 10 jazz musicians?
Not King Cole.
Not necessarily jazz, no.
Edgar Allan Poe.
Yeah.
No, no.
Hold on.
Coltrane Johnson.
John Coltrane, yeah.
Yeah.
I'll give you that one.
Okay.
You ready for this one?
Yeah.
B.B. King.
Blues.
Medgar Evers.
But that jazz.
Medgar Evers, yes.
Yeah.
He didn't play anything,
but he did like a jazz.
Okay.
Here we go.
Maya Angelou.
No, let's move on.
Let's move on.
No, no, no.
No, hold on.
You got nothing right.
Ray Charles.
No.
Oh, dude.
Ernest Hemingway.
Thanks for saying Ray Charles.
I want to talk about this.
Listen, we'll wrap it up with this.
Koreans invented Braille.
Thank you.
Yeah.
Braille translators.
Oh, yes, that's right.
Not even.
They re-imagined Braille.
I saw a documentary on Netflix.
It's The Greatest Night in Music.
I think, I don't know what it was called.
Oh, yeah, I saw that.
You saw it.
About We Are the World.
We Are the World.
And did you see it?
I didn't see it.
Oh, my God.
It's pretty sick.
It's incredible.
Yeah.
The way, I mean, imagine getting all those guys in one night to stay in one
studio.
Insane.
Till five in the morning to lay down a track, right?
After they went to the AMA awards or whatever.
Yeah, something like that.
Yeah, something like that, right.
And the amount of talent in that room, but without Quincy Jones and Michael
Jackson, right?
Sure.
Dude, the funniest parts is when Michael Jackson was with Lionel Richie and
they're at like
Michael Jackson's house, right?
And Lionel Richie's like talking about something and then all of a sudden he
hears like a hiss.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah, like, right?
He goes, what the fuck is that?
And then Michael Jackson goes, oh, there he is.
He's been missing for so long.
And there's this gigantic boa constrictor, right?
And Lionel Richie's all freaked out, you know what I mean?
Just to think that Michael Jackson, he's just like not a normal.
No, because you can't be that talented and be normal.
It's one or the other.
But when you watch this though, and you're like, yeah, there he is.
When he was missing for like two days, I think.
But it almost ate Lionel Richie.
But yeah, but when you think of, when you see that documentary, you go and you
see him singing
and stuff, you go, wow, he's so, you can just tell how talented he is.
Oh, yeah.
Big time.
He, he was legend, almost like he had autism.
Yeah.
But there are some people in there, I don't know why they were in it.
Like, like.
Give me, I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings.
Like, why was Dan Aykroyd in it?
That's true.
Yeah.
Yeah.
He's not a singer.
Yeah.
Yeah.
What is he doing there?
Yeah.
But you saw him in it.
Huey Lewis.
Well, he's a good singer though.
Yeah.
Huey Lewis is a good singer.
He's a big celebrity.
Yeah.
But like.
But the one person they couldn't, they almost said no was Cyndi Lauper.
She's like, I don't know.
Yeah.
They're like, bitch, fucking Ray Charles is going, bitch.
Yeah.
You know what I mean?
Yeah.
You go.
Bruce Springsteen.
She, she's.
Yeah.
I mean, these, a lot of these people, because there's just a little before my
time, I don't
even know who they are.
Well, yeah, you do.
Was Whitney Houston, was she in it?
Yeah.
Okay.
Mariah Carey?
No, she wasn't around then.
I mean, look at me right now.
Do you know who Kenny Rogers is?
Yes.
Yes, I do.
Give me a song.
No one to hold him.
No one to fold him, fucker.
Whoa.
That was really fucking good.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Give me another one.
Give me another one.
Dionne Warwick.
She does the.
Is her name Diane Warwick or Dionne?
Dionne Warwick does the tarot card readings.
Exactly.
Bob Dylan, you know.
He died in the plane crash.
No.
You know Bob Dylan.
You're being jokey.
No, I swear.
I swear.
You don't know who Bob Dylan is.
I do know who Bob Dylan is.
I've heard the name.
I don't know one of his songs.
Let It Be.
What's one of his songs?
Are you being fucking real right now, dude?
I swear.
I'm not even fucking real.
You're so dumb right now, dude.
You're really upsetting the shit out of him.
No, no, no.
Bob Dylan, I'm sure I know.
If you ask me to pick him out of a lineup, I'm sure I know.
I think I could guess which one he was.
Yeah.
But I've heard the name Bob Dylan, but I don't know one of his songs.
Okay.
Okay.
But you know who he is.
I've heard of him, but I don't know his song.
You know Stevie Wonder, right?
Stevie Wonder, yeah.
You Are the Sunshine of My Life.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
You Are the Sunshine of My Life.
You Are the Sunshine of My Life.
I Just Called to Say I Love You and then Lionel Richie.
Anyway, what do you want to promote?
Anything?
ChristyComedy.com.
I got a bunch of stand-up dates up there.
Some are selling well.
Some aren't.
I had to cancel my shows in auction this weekend.
I'm running into absolute ticket problems in certain markets.
Like what ones?
On this one?
This one, we could pick up the pace in Fort Worth, Texas,
but that might be, it might have happened already.
I think it's going to be good.
New Year's Eve in December, Phoenix in December.
I will be in Phoenix, Arizona.
Stand-Up Live?
Stand-Up Live.
I love that room.
And then New Year's Eve in Miami Improv
from December 28th to the 31st.
I just, I like doing my random weekends,
you know what I mean?
But you're still away a lot because you do the movies.
Yeah, but I would do different things,
you know what I mean?
A variety of different things.
And then me and Andrew are going to do Australia
and Singapore, but, you know.
Australia's the lowest white.
I know, but they're my favorite.
And you know how I know they're lower?
Yeah.
Because they're the girls that really hit on me a lot.
They love you.
On Instagram.
They really do.
Like the hottest ones go,
when are you coming, baby?
You know what I mean?
I don't know if that did actually.
But anyway, thank you so much.
Thank you for being a bad friend.
Thank you.
That was great, man.

Bobby Lee EMBARRASSED In Front of Maroon 5?!

I can't believe you're not coming for my show tonight.
Yeah, I just have to do this thing, I think.
You know what?
I'll tell you why.
Okay.
I'll tell you why.
Let's get off this.
I'll tell you why.
It's because throughout my whole life,
I've been known not to go to these events.
Yeah, I'm not good at the socializations,
the social aspects of show business.
I've never been good at it.
I've been called aloof.
I've been called like he seemed weird.
You know what I mean?
I'm being real.
I mean, that's the thing that people say.
We're shocked.
Yeah, people go, I don't invite him because it's weird.
You know what I mean?
Why?
He just sits in a corner.
I don't really talk too much.
It's also I try too hard sometimes because I got to be cool, right?
So it's just like I'm not like I'll interject into a conversation
I shouldn't interject.
Right.
You know, I'll give you an example.
Last week we were in Vegas.
And after my show with Bert, I got invited to Maroon 5.
Great.
And, you know, we saw Maroon 5 and then backstage Adam wanted to say hi.
So I brought my friend John Park, dumbfounded.
And talk about embarrassing.
This guy tried so hard.
Like Adam brought up Korea and then John just stepped in.
Well, yeah, Korea, I'm legit in Korea, he says, right?
And eventually I had to go, Adam, I'm sorry.
He's trying too hard.
And I backed him out.
Wow.
Right.
I go, shut the fuck up, dude.
You're embarrassing.
You said that to him.
Yeah.
And then later he got mad.
He's like, you embarrassed me.
I don't know.
You embarrassed yourself.
But I understand how John was because that's what I'm like sometimes.
Are you good at parties?
What is he famous for in Korea?
Nothing.
That's what.
No, he was like, I know all the like legit restaurants.
Yeah.
Why would Maroon 5 care about that?
Exactly.
Yeah.
Bingo, dude.
Yeah.
They're like, I don't care what the hot restaurant is in Pyongyang.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
We don't care either.
Yeah.
Yeah, either anyone.
Yeah.
Right.
But, and I said, he likes you, John, just back up.
Yeah.
You're trying too hard.
Yeah.
And then Adam laughed at that.
Right.
And he thought I was ridiculing him.
Right.
Right.
But anyway, but the truth be known is I was a little nervous.
Because of being around him.
Just being around that whole situation.
Because, you know, you watch that show, it's like the highest level of.
Sure.
Production.
Yeah.
It's incredible, the sound.
Did they.
The choreography.
Okay, it's fine.
Hold on.
It's fine.
Yeah, it's fine.
That's what Germans invented the fart.
They did?
Yes.
Yeah, yeah.
I'm not good at parties, no.
I try to, like today I have a show.
And then after there's people coming to the show, you know, it's LA, the age as
well.
And I just, I want to run out the back door right after the show.
WME.
Oh, WME, okay.
Yeah, yeah.
So I want to run because I don't like the social interaction.
Because I can go on stage and do this all day for hours.
But when it's the small talk, I don't know how to do it.
I don't want to do it.
I get very, very, very uncomfortable.
Yeah, me too.
I'm not good at it.
Right.
And yeah, it's unnatural almost.
You were really going to town yesterday on that jalapeno cornbread and the brisket
and the mac and cheese.
You really-
Well, why would you?
Why would you?
You really just-
No, because he had stomach problems all night.
I heard him going to the bathroom all night.
Were you-
Did you really?
I heard one.
Could I be honest with you?
I didn't-
So I ate a couple of pieces and my stomach has an instinctual alert system.
Right?
Kareem's invented that.
Yeah, I know we did.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And it's sort of like a queef out of your butt.
You know what I mean?
It's not a fart.
You know what I mean?
But it's a queef out of your butt.
It's like this.
You go-
Yeah.
Yeah.
And my butt did that and I stopped eating it.
Smart.
It's my system going, there's something wrong.
And you didn't eat again for the rest of the night?
No, I did.
Oh.
I had pasta.
Right.
So you just completely-
I had carbonara pasta.
You ignored the system.
I did.
Yeah.
And I had a difficult night.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Sometimes you ignore the system.
Yeah.
But when you-
When you-
Did you keep eating?
Does your body have an alert system?
Sometimes it didn't with that.
Okay.
Yeah.
I have heartburn.
I woke up in one night.
You had heartburn, okay.
Yeah.
And then we ate-
And then we ate big Italian meal
just before we came in.
Then I fell asleep on Don's couch.
Oh, that's interesting.
So let me ask you about your experiences in LA.
Do you-
You don't like it?
LA?
Yeah.
I don't have a problem with LA at all,
but I am-
I am absolutely-
If you said,
Hey, Chris, your career will get twice as big.
You just have to go to LA more
or you just have to move to LA,
I would say I'd rather just stay where I'm at
and just be in New York.
Because I don't hate LA.
It's just my whole family and life
and me feeling at peace
is all in New York.
Sure, sure.
I like staying in the original 13 colonies.
Okay, okay.
That's what it is.
That's enough said and well put.
Yeah.
Yeah, I agree.
Yes.
Yeah, yeah.
I don't like it.
Like for me,
if you could tell me I will have a career
from Vermont to Georgia,
the original 13,
I would like to do that.
Really?
I don't like to go too far west.
This is way too far.
This is to me,
this is the Spanish.
This is not our country.
Our country,
what our founding fathers believed
was the 13 colonies.
And then Thomas Jefferson bought
the Louisiana Purchase.
He bought too much land.
Yeah, yeah.
That's not what we wanted.
That's not what was agreed upon.
So I like staying in the original 13.
So if we would have stayed
with the 13 colonies,
what would have happened
with the rest of the country,
you think?
Well, it would have been
like no man's land.
No, it would have stayed
with Spain and France.
And do you know Thomas Jefferson,
the actual president
of the United States
at this time,
when he bought
the Louisiana Purchase,
when they sent Lewis and Clark out
into that big blue west?
Thomas Jefferson,
this is why culture
and society is wild.
Thomas Jefferson,
who was the president,
the sitting president,
very smart inventor type guy,
he believed,
and they were not sure
if they were going
to encounter dinosaurs or not.
Really?
I swear to God.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
In like Ohio and all that,
they knew they were going
to encounter hostile
Native Americans,
but they also thought
there could be
a Tyrannosaurus Rex out there.
Wow.
Because they didn't have
any information.
Oh, right.
They were scared.
Yeah, right.
Of course.
But so that's what they thought,
that they thought
there were dinosaurs.
Interesting.
But see,
the original 13,
so from actually,
not even Vermont
was an original,
so from New Hampshire
up to Georgia,
that's my zone right there.
That's where I like
to sell tickets,
that's where I like to stay.
Yeah.
My family has fun there.
We feel close.
But don't you like the way
it's a little bit more
space in L.A.?
No.
You don't like that?
Space gives me anxiety.
When you give me space,
you give me places
for people to hide.
Ah.
I don't like that.
There are places
to hide in New York, no?
No,
but I know them all.
Oh,
you know the little cubby holes?
Yeah, I know them all.
Oh, I see.
Yes,
and I think that
for me out here,
things get a little weird out here.
You get a lot of serial killers out here.
You get a lot of people
just alone with their thoughts out here.
Things can move too slow.
Yeah.
There's a lot of isolation.
We're over here,
we're on top of each other.
Yeah.
And that in the moments
can be frustrating,
but that makes us feel
more connected as humans.
And I like it more
in the original 13.
Yeah,
because so does Sam.
Let's talk about the killer.
He was from New York.
Yeah,
so that's one you got me on.
No,
but that's only one really.
I can't think of any other ones.
Can you?
Yeah,
the Boston Strangler.
Yeah,
yeah,
he's a pretty good one.
But the son of Sam
got caught quickly,
no?
Or no?
Son of Sam.
Yeah.
So son of Sam.
He shot people.
He shot people.
And allegedly,
son of Sam,
they pinned it on him,
but he didn't do all the murders.
It was a cult of people
doing the murders.
Oh,
that's interesting tidbits.
Thank you for saying that.
Supposedly.
T.T. Jerry
was in prison with son of Sam
and told us that.
Wow.
But you would have to admit though,
the Midwestern
and the Northern serial killers
are the worst.
The worst.
Don't you think?
The Midwestern
and the Northern,
yeah.
Yeah,
yeah.
I don't,
well,
really the mid,
like Milwaukee on,
Jeffrey Dahmer,
John Wayne Casey,
they're doing an Ed Gein movie
right now.
Ted Bundy,
Ed Gein,
these are all like West,
West where expansion
is no good.
Manifest Destiny,
I don't like that.
I want the original 13,
that's all.
I think we should go back,
if the United States
wants any chance,
I say we get rid of everything
besides those original 13
and people come and move
to where,
to the East Coast.
We have the water there,
we have the weather there.
What do you think of Cal exit
or Texas exit?
I'm for it.
You're for states
getting removed
from the union.
Thank you so much for union
and just having their
independent own country.
Do it.
You think so?
Do it.
Because to me,
it's,
you know,
it's the East Coast
down in Georgia.
Oh,
so what you're saying to me
is that if
Washington,
Oregon,
and California
got off
and we were on
our own country
and then you did that
with the 13 colonies,
that there would be a war,
I think we'd be allies,
no?
We would be allies,
yeah.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah, we would be allies.
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah, because
we would,
yeah,
we would be allies.
Texas wouldn't be our ally.
Yeah.
I don't want Texas.
But I feel like our army
would be better than your army.
Which army are you in?
The Asian army?
No, no, no, no.
I'm in the California,
Oregon, Washington.
No, no, no.
Because somebody like Don,
who's from Georgia,
we have the deep south
in the 13 colonies.
They're the fighters.
Yeah, but we have MS-13.
That's true.
Yeah, but they're not,
but they're not,
they're not legal.
We still have them.
That's true.
Yeah, yeah.
We still have them.
Yeah.
Rather,
regardless,
I'd make them legal.
They'll work for you.
I'll make them legal, right?
And that's a pretty good army.
Here,
we throw out them first.
Look at that.
That guy, dude?
Oh, yeah,
I don't want to fuck with that guy, dude.
Yeah,
his tattoos are on his eyeballs.
Those guys are bad.
They're pretty bad.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Or good if they're listening.
Look at that hand gesture.
I can't even do that with my fingers.
I know.
I have arthritis.
Yeah,
I couldn't do it.
Yeah.
But I think,
I think,
yeah,
I think we should think more,
as Americans,
we should think more about
just going back to what
this was originally intended.
I don't think so.
It's never going to happen.
No.
Yeah, yeah.
I think it's fine the way it is.
I, you know,
I think that we're like
politically polarized in this country
like we've never seen.
But I think at the end of the day,
you know,
we'll be fine.
That's the thing is like,
what do you think this is any worse today
than it was in the French Revolution
when they cut the king and queen's heads off?
Like,
it's the same shit.
Just relax.
Everyone needs to just fucking relax.
That's what I'm saying.
They're living in the worst time
in American history
and they're like,
what?
Yeah.
All 400,000 soldiers died.
Yeah.
There's been a lot of points
in American history
that was worse.
Sure.
Yeah.
I mean,
the depression was terrible.
The Great Depression.
The great one.
Right.
And that's where jazz came out.
That's it.
That's where jazz came out.
And that's where,
yeah.
Yeah.
Can you name me 10 jazz musicians?
Not King Cole.
Not necessarily jazz, no.
Edgar Allan Poe.
Yeah.
No, no.
Hold on.
Coltrane Johnson.
John Coltrane, yeah.
Yeah.
I'll give you that one.
Okay.
You ready for this one?
Yeah.
B.B. King.
Blues.
Medgar Evers.
But that jazz.
Medgar Evers, yes.
Yeah.
He didn't play anything,
but he did like a jazz.
Okay.
Here we go.
Maya Angelou.
No, let's move on.
Let's move on.
No, no, no