Name: Morgan Jay's Sack
Uploaded: 2024-12-21T15:30:01.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Morgan Jay's Sack' from Bad Friends Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-12-21. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Morgan Jay's Sack' from Bad Friends Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2024-12-21. Transcript available.

look at this i can't see what that what is that just come please look at it
what is that oh no
is that dip is that like a uh what is this area right here dude that's a croissant
jelly type
shit look at this area right i see it yeah what is the white thing taste it macon
no no no don't
don't taste it but but listen paper can you can you clean that or do we have
those disinfectant
rags this is insane dude you clean his side my side's like this they don't
clean my side i just
don't get it dirty like you do that's a big difference yo what are you doing
bro i'm nervous
just wipe it just wipe it you don't let it soak it doesn't what was that evil
laugh do that evil laugh
all right that's good i'm letting it soak it doesn't soak no you don't no you
don't know how to soak it
dead it's fine let's go yeah i soak so good mormons do some people do mormons
are the big
super soakers mormons are the super soakers of the world yeah and then what's a
kid that goes
underneath the bed and rocks the bed what's his name so they soak right they
because they can't
have movement so they stick the wiener in they don't move it and then someone
goes onto the bed
and pushes it the kid from the grudge that's right that's who it is i call it
the kid from the
grudge see look at the shaking the bed in mormon it's something commonly done
by mormon
teens expected to remain virgins it's called it's called jump humping jump humping
so the
guy gets under the bed and moves the bed last night where were you i was at
home i was at
my friend's show i didn't feel good last night oh yeah can't you tell i'm all
clogged up oh
my back is killing love you dude
oh okay stop now i know i was supposed to go last night i texted it was a while
i texted show
today i apologize last night i'm at the comedy store and i see the sickly guy
not sickly handsome
skinny you know talented you mean in shape that's what i meant yeah like an in
shape right you're
right right yeah okay that's resentment talking i think yeah dude put that away
yeah yeah let me let
me put that aside holster that put that in the holster yeah because you're
looking skinny lately how
many people on how many people on tour commented that the ozempic must be
working because you look
skinny well you heard it the whole trip jeremiah watkins last night called me
fatty yeah he goes what's up
fatty and i could i could not believe it yeah but he's like paper he's like a wispy
thin guy he attacked me
anyway um why did he call you fatty i don't know why what who started it he did
he just came up to
you and goes hey fatty yeah wow it was incredible and that dr phil stuff's
going to his head huh
i think that's what it is tilc till coney till coney kill tony kill tony i mean
is that our version
welcome back to till coney till coney and dr phil got to his head yeah anyway
um so last night this
guy comes up to me yeah morgan jay is it jay morgan or what would it happen it's
more good okay
you really think his you you think jay morgan you've known him i know but i
thought he switched
it no no i've never heard anyone with the last name of jay everybody says morgan
jay morgan all
the time i don't know why that happened yeah because of two first names yeah
that's your fault
my first and middle name right what's your real last name venti chinkway are
you really venti chinkway
means uh 25 25 yeah no don't do that what's your real last name he doesn't know
it's venti chinkway
no chance it's not venti chinkway give me your id are we introducing me yet not
yet no no we're
just doing this right you let us take control of the show venti chinkway all
right venti chinkway
there's only one part of that last name i love i can't believe this guy venti
chinkway i can't
believe this guy look i swear every time i do my house wow they won't even let
me bro he even has a
hot driver's license he's hot in the photo he's got a side he's side and
teaching way he's doing one of
these yeah jay's your middle name i went to my first i went no no it's my
always my middle name for
morgan jay morgan jay morgan jay venti chinkway 25. yeah 25. yeah it's a weird
last name there's a whole
weird story in sicily okay you're siciliano that's fine here you go same dude
yeah and man you are
hot everyone else has to face forward when they take the picture and they
usually say don't smile
he's so hot they let him go sideways and smile yeah you are a hot guy you're
sexy morgan jay
is in the building give it up for morgan jay i got an intro man yeah it was
taking too long
it was too long oh yeah well can i not yet can i just say what i'm going to say
and then oh yeah
say what you want let me see what i want to say say what you want to say this
is his favorite let
him do this
drink away he hangs out with benny hops a little two eyes really yeah jimmy the
cricket he knows
jimmy the cricket he knows jimmy the cricket how long you know jimmy the
cricket how long you know jimmy
jimmy the cricket how long you know jimmy the cricket all right so
so last night he comes up to me nervous yeah yeah he goes i'm a little nervous
about what he goes i wrote down questions no i wrote down talking points okay
it's not quite i wrote in k sorry go ahead i'm gonna i'm gonna i'm gonna show
you every time
you interrupt him he's gonna do the yeah yeah that's it that's that's the
let me see some of these questions this is what i showed him all right so some
of the questions that
he wrote down or some of the talking points making this list because i feel
like i'm not a good
podcast guest did whitney's podcast she never put it out did dumbfounded
podcast we had to redo it
yeah i did i did he explains all this i did tiger milf podcast you didn't put
it out yeah tiger oh
the yours no not mine yeah jeong uh john yang oh jeong summers how do you wait
wait hers is called
tiger milk tiger milf yeah she's your protege she called hers tiger milf yeah i
don't know i guess yeah
i'm gonna get this okay all right so listen you did whitney's and she never put
it out
i know she never put it out but that's also because she could have taken the
wrong pill that
day and forgot to post then you had a colonoscopy on friday yeah and the drug
they gave you felt
good what it was the michael jackson drug like propan and all pro pro oh oh
profan uh profanol
right it was good that's good carlos don't not so can i just finish my intro
real quick brother
we're already there no i'm not there yet no there's another thing that that he
says another thing
what do i say i'm so nervous i'm with somebody yeah right he gives me the list
who are you with a
comic a young lady oh nice lady then he goes i didn't i didn't even ask he goes
i got a visectomy
stop you then he goes i swear he goes you want to see it stop i was so nervous
i just i go we're on
the patio i go i go i know i didn't even ask i didn't even ask you're the guy
who shows his pubes
to audiences and then right he goes do you want to see you yeah and i go we're
in the patio so there's
people around what the is your problem yeah but the guy who shows his pubes to
people on stage i
thought this makes sense it was like i thought that was your energy this makes
sense oh you can't
ma you can't match you can't match my energy okay you can't match it did it my
my energy is my own
frequency you can't match it all right did ozempic shrink your hands look at
your little finger i know
dude everything you went like this i know i know i wasn't really gonna do it
but i was nervous and
i just was bomb can i see it i do want to see it respect to me yeah can i i
could i'll show you
really want to see it i'd love this i don't want to put it on camera but i'd
love to see it you got
to see it i don't want to see it i want to see it i refuse to see it i got to
see it why'd you get a
vasectomy because you never want to have kids look there's there's a scar right
there okay you have
nice testicles dude there's one on the other side too my dogs are very very
pink you you you're real
bald well i i shave my balls you shave with a razor or with like a like a like
a walking it down i shave
with a razor most of us italians we don't shave our balls no i shave with a
razor yeah you go down on
women yeah italians don't throw that neither we don't throw that oh that wasn't
us the sopranos
right he didn't want to eat his that they used to be real faux pas for italian
americans to go down
on it it was like you suck my you want to see it i just saw it you didn't see
it yeah i saw the pink
sack all right nice color beautiful sack nice beautiful sack so i'm sorry dude
no no i'm sorry
wait let's back up you're 37 years old yeah and you got a vasectomy because you
never want it you're
like no kids ever are you married i i got a i got a serious partner i'm with
okay right uh we're in
an open thing and uh you know i'm dealing with something right now currently we
don't know for
sure if this girl's like lying or not about a pregnancy oh that kind of put the
fear of god
in me oh it's like you know you got to change things what'd i tell you no what
i tell you what
no you told me what i tell you i mean you told me last night what the fuck i
tell you so you don't
fuck ohio you don't fuck girls you don't go midwest and fuck them yeah you
gotta you told me my
isn't that where whitney's kid is from miami no but another crisis another
comic was like you
gotta hook up can i have my phone back no okay another comic was saying like
you can't hook up
with girls in small towns if you're doing in a big city it's like oh i didn't
tell you that oh yeah
you told me that somebody told you yes wait a minute because if you do it in a
small town
she'll probably have the kid no it's just like you're like i don't want you you're
like the coolest
thing to happen in that town uh-huh like if you fuck a girl in miami she'll
fuck a football player
the next day you know or before if she fucks you yeah yeah literally or you
might be the appetizer
and then she but yeah but me me and my me and my girl we've we've already like
talked about how we
don't want to have kids and you don't bag it no i do i do and this this this
might come was nowhere
near this person so now i'm like oh that's even okay what do you mean what do
you mean he's saying
the person that claimed pregnancy he there was no there was no interact there
was no transactional jizz
yeah no sometimes i can redirect my jizz and and and they haven't and i i
really can
your your jizz walks like an old asian man with his hands behind his back strumming
through the
street i know and by the time to smoke by the time time it comes out of your
penis she's home sludge
yeah she's already at home she's gone yeah anyway um but yeah so i got it and
just out of an abundance
of caution and also you know in the next four years are gonna be tough on women
so i figured i'd get my
nuts uh snipped up anyway all right because trump might take away because i did
this before the
election i did this in september
you