Name: Thanksgiving with Michael Bay
Uploaded: 2025-01-17T17:00:17.000Z
Description: Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Thanksgiving with Michael Bay' from Bad Friends Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2025-01-17. Transcript available.

Watch the stand-up comedy video 'Thanksgiving with Michael Bay' from Bad Friends Clips on Comedy Buff. Published 2025-01-17. Transcript available.

- Can I ask you a question?
- Yeah.
- I got invited to a Thanksgiving with somebody.
Should I go, you think?
- Can you tell them?
- Michael Bay.
- Michael Bay.
- Yeah.
- You're gonna blow up that bathroom.
- Yeah.
- Imagine the whole table just explodes.
Lights on fire.
- You think I should go?
- I have no plans.
- From a personal perspective?
Do you want to come to my house?
- Who's going to your house?
- Nobody, my cousin and a friend or two.
- Yeah, maybe.
- You come to my house?
- Yeah, maybe.
But if the Michael Bay thing is real, I'll go there.
- 100%.
- Yeah.
I know your priorities.
- Yeah, yeah.
- Best friend, Michael Bay.
- I just think that it would be like an interesting story.
- Of course.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- Okay, here my assumption,
the reason I didn't invite you to Thanksgiving, honestly,
my assumption is you would not want to do that.
- Well, you know, well, can I say something to you?
Have I not been showing up to places?
- No, you do.
- Lately, I've been being very mindful
about going to different places.
- I agree.
- And when I get invited and I go.
- But I'm saying--
- I go to raves, whatever.
- We talked about inviting you.
- Yeah.
- And my wife was like, "Do you want to invite Bob?"
I said, "Yeah, but I don't think
he would like this kind of thing."
Because I don't know, you know, traditionally.
- If you're going to be anal, then no.
- I am, I'm sure.
- Well, I'm going to be a mess.
- Yeah.
Yeah, I don't want you at the house.
- I'm going, I'm going.
- No, go to Michael Bay.
Please, please.
Now that I think about it.
- There's cranberry sauce on the ceiling?
- Yeah.
There's another thing that I've noticed is
at this comedy store, people have been like,
I had a waitress come up to me and go,
"Have you been working out?"
I go, "No."
Why are you laughing?
- I'm saying the Ozempic is working.
- And then Steph Tolove goes, "Oh, I see it now."
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
- Stand up, stand up for real.
- Well, I'm not--
- Just stand up.
You don't have to do anything else but stand up.
We can see it.
It's an obvious difference.
- Can you or no?
- Yes.
- Be honest.
- You said it every fucking day.
- It used to protrude.
- Wait a minute.
What did you say, Carlos?
You can't tell?
- I can't tell.
So I see him every day.
- You can totally tell.
- You need to take more.
- Oh my God.
- Oh my God.
- What are you doing?
- See, that's what I'm saying.
He wants me to overdose on Ozempic.
- No, don't do this.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
He wants me to die.
- No, it's like weed.
You can't overdose.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- No, you literally can.
And also, let's stop plugging Ozempic.
It's fucking Waygovy.
- Waygovy, yeah, yeah.
- The other one.
- Oh, okay.
- The amount of people that commented on my Instagram
about you, they were let down
'cause they thought you were on Ozempic.
And so they were too.
- Yeah.
- But now you're on Waygovy,
and now people were like, fuck, I gotta switch.
- No, I'm still on, I have Black Market Ozempic too.
- Oh, you do?
You're a bad boy.
- Yeah.
- Waygovy guy.
- I do both, I do both.
- The smeglitude, but it is working.
Everyone on tour has said that.
There was a few ladies that said that on tour.
I mean, it was just true.
The truth is the truth.
- I'm so hungry.
- But don't eat.
- I'm not.
- Yeah, just don't.
Bobby wants it because he wants to be,
say it with me.
- Hollywood.
- Ripped.
Well, you wanna be ripped.
- Jacked, I think it was.
- Jacked.
Ripped and jacked.
- What did you say in the van?
- You'll see.
- You'll see.
- You'll see.
- And that's the name of the special, you'll see.
Be jacked, absolute jacked and ripped.
And you know what?
I think you're on your way.
I mean, you're definitely losing the weight.
Are you late night snacking?
- No.
- No, look at me, nothing.
- Mm-mm.
- Not even like a KitKat or a chippy?
- Well, last night, I went to Shabu Shabu.
It was my first meal.
- Of the day.
- Of the day.
And then after the store, Andrea Jin goes,
"Let's go have dinner."
I'm like, "I already ate."
And she's like, "Just call."
So I went to Sunundang, right?
And they had a couple of dumplings.
And then that's there.
- That's nothing.
- Dude, I've been going to Wii Spa every day.
It's been great.
In fact, last night at Wii Spa, it's so interesting.
I'm in the fucking dry sauna, completely naked.
And I sit like this.
- That's how you're supposed to sit.
You know what I mean?
I just got to sit like this.
And I lean like this.
- Mm-hmm.
- You know, and there's only a lot of black guys in there,
which I love.
Like, "What's up, brah?"
"What's up, man?"
- You got to show off.
- Yeah, and I do this.
I'm not afraid of my little guy, right?
There's two white dudes sitting there,
and I was looking at them like this.
I was looking at them like this.
And they were like, "What are you looking at, man?"
You guys.
- Yeah, I'm looking right at you.
- Yeah, yeah.
And they go, "Oh."
They go, "What do you guys do?"
I go, "We're actors."
We just moved here from, I forgot where.
You know, I got there and we talked a little bit about,
it's dry, you know what I mean?
- Mm-hmm.
- And then later when I'm like done,
they come up to me and they go,
"You're Bobby Lee, I can't believe it."
I go, "Why didn't you say that in the dry sauna?"
- Yeah, why'd you say that, yeah.
You didn't think it was the penis thing?
You think that- - I don't think so.
What do you think?
- Well, they might have been threatened.
- I mean, but it's like, why don't,
you can just say, "Hey, you're Bobby Lee, right?
What's the problem here?"
- Well, 'cause it's kind of hard to,
your cock is right there,
so they might want to save the excitement
for when they don't see your cock.
- Oh, what if I started getting harder?
- That's why.
- That would be so funny, dude.
- That's what I'm talking about.
- You're Bobby Lee, "Doo."
- You do get excited when people notice you.
- Yeah, I love, when's the last time you went to Wee Spa?
- Forever.
- Yeah?
- It's been so long.
- Have you gone?
- No, I don't know.
- I love it though, I wanna go back.
- You're going every day?
- To Wee Spa?
- Yeah.
- I'm not going to that dry sauna with you.
- Why?
- There's a women's department.
There's a women's department.
- Yeah, there's a section.
- It's like men and women.
- You would go in your own section?
- Yeah.
- What is it like, walk me through it,
because I have no idea what it is.
- Can I ask you something?
- Yeah.
- I'm not trying to start anything at all.
- Yeah.
- Are there trans people in the saunas?
- No.
- Okay.
- There was a controversy at Wee Spa.
Do you know the controversy?
- No.
- So Wee Spa, see that photo right there?
They give you clothes, and so there's a co-ed area
of the spa.
- But there's no nudity.
- There's no nudity.
There's like a clay room, a salt room,
and then we're fully clothed with other people,
and you steam out there and do your thing there.
- You can meditate, there's yoga.
There's a women's department too, right?
Anyway, the controversy was, if you go to Wee Spa,
there's kids.
- Sure.
- Running around.
There's like a lot of like, in my section,
little boys running around.
- Not late at night, but yes.
- Even late at night.
- Sometime?
- Yeah.
- Wow.
- Yeah, yeah.
Even late at night, you'll see like a Korean kickoff.
You know what I mean?
Right?
And you're trying to like, you know what I mean, be cool,
you know, but you know what I mean?
- Yeah.
- You gotta be cool.
- Gotta be cool, man.
- So a couple years ago, a man, a woman.
- A trans woman, right.
- Who hasn't had the procedure.
- Sure.
- Went to the women's department.
And there's little girls there.
- Right.
- That's what happened.
Right, Reid?
- That's right here.
- Yeah, and then there was protest
'cause they kicked the guy out, the girl out.
- A trans woman with the presence of a nude individual
with a penis, most commonly believed as a trans woman.
The women's changing area of the spa.
The video went viral, attracting significant attention
from gender critical feminists.
Also termed trans exclusionary, oh, TERFs, right.
And some media, which led to protests and counter protests.
Some media outlets initially questioned
whether or not the alleged incident had been a hoax.
They reported, again, the transgender woman
was charged with indecent exposure
relating to the alleged incident
after four women and one minor girl
filed police reports in July.
Suspect is awaiting trial on seven counts of exposure.
And finally, judge ruled that the indecent exposure case
could proceed citing the testimony of two witnesses
and the individual in question had partial or full erection
for a duration of 30 to 60 minutes during the incident.
That's a bummer.
It's a bummer to have a boner.
But that spa is phenomenal.
I mean, if I could walk around there hard, I would.
Yeah.
Imagine taking a fucking blue chew
then going to Wee Spa.
But it's also a cultural thing.
It's like, it's a Korean establishment, right?
That's right.
What?
Yeah.
Yes.
And they're like, you know,
it's just a different culture.
And it was just like, what else are they going to do?
You're saying they, you saying they're just in their,
in their removal of the.
If there's, I mean,
'cause I know that there's always little girls
and little boys, right?
I'm talking about five, six year old kids running around.
Right.
And it's just a part of Korean culture
to bring your kids to a spa.
It's like, you know?
Yeah.
And I would do it if I was a father.
And I don't know.
I just think that it's inappropriate.
It's hard for your kid to see someone else's penis.
This kid only sees my penis.
My kid sees my penis.
Yeah.
But they're little girls, right?
So he's in the women's department.
I know.
You know what I mean?
Do you remember the first time you saw your dad's penis,
by the way?
When I saw it or sucked it.
Okay.
You should have did.
I remember the moment I see my dad's penis.
I mean, what a bummer.
I almost grew up on a nudist colony.
Did I ever tell you guys that?
What?
Did I ever?
You almost did?
So you didn't.
No, my dad wanted to take me to a nudist colony.
And my mom was like,
I don't want the first penis she sees to be your penis.
How old were you?
I don't even remember it,
but it had to have been after they were divorced.
So probably around six to eight.
Seven.
Yeah.
Wow.
A nudist colony.
Different life.
Are there any nudist colonies in Southern California?
Welcome to Southern California's premier family nudist resort
and RV park located halfway between Los Angeles and San Diego.
Glen Eden is nestled 154 acres with the base
of the Cleveland National Forest.
We're the perfect combination for a resort for amenities and nature.
Dude, we have to go to this.
There's a nude.
And look, it's a Korean woman on the photo.
Glen Eden Sun Club here in Southern California,
the largest member owned nudist and resort club.
I am joining.
Why?
Because dude, clothes are so fucking dumb.
I know, but look at, look, look at that photo to the left, right?
Yeah.
Those are what we're going to be saying.
Yeah. I don't want to grow up there.
Fun, fun, fun.
Like Clint Eastwood's dust dick.
Hello, partner.
You know what I mean?
Just no, no, I'm saying retire here.
I don't want to, I don't think you should grow up here.
I should retire.
I want to retire here.
Oh, okay. I mean-
Don't you hate laundry?
Yeah.
Imagine never doing laundry again and every day waking up, eating naked,
swimming naked,
hanging out naked.
Not worrying about it.
You love the Wii Spa naked in the sauna.
Imagine if that's every day.
That's true.
And because you've got a nice little cock who cares, run around with it.
What's the difference?
And they do Toys for Tots.
That's great.
Yeah.
I mean, this place is fantastic.
Yeah.
And look at this.
They're plant-based.
You can go vegan there if you feel like it.
I'm in.
Call us up.
Call us.
There's just some things you can't do naked.
When did clothes first start happening?
Cavemen, probably.
Well, I'm sure, I mean, before anything, clothes were probably for fucking
warmth.
And protection, yeah.
And protection.
And then it became about puritanical fucking ideologies of covering up parts of
your body.
Right.
Like shoes was probably the first thing.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Look at that.
I got the first shoe in Africa on there.
Between 30,000 and 120,000 years ago.
Oh, just a small gap.
Between 30,000.
I know.
Wow.
And 120,000 years ago.
Early clothing was made from animal skins and fur and leaves and grass and wrap
draped
tied around the body.
Clothing changed with wealth.
I mean, I just think like, you know, there was a point when nudity in the
summer was chill
and somebody didn't like it.
Some small dicked weirdo was like, we should cover up.
That's so funny.
Yeah.
That's probably exactly how it happened.
You know what I mean?
Some small dick loser in the community was like, I don't like to see other guys
penises.
It's gross.
And everybody's like, what are you talking about?
Yeah.
What are you talking about?
Yeah.
Everyone has their penis out.
Yeah.
I think it's gross.
Yeah.
Leroy.
As soon as Leroy.
I don't like when Jermaine comes over.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
For dinner.
I don't like it.
Yeah, yeah.
Your wife is like, what's the problem?
Yeah.
He's not my kind of guy.
Yeah, yeah.
Some fucking huge cock guy moved into a community and then all these fucking
insecure dudes were
like, we should wear clothing.
Yeah.
I don't like that.
I don't like that that's out.
You know, I want to move into the village where the Changs live.
And by the way, that's how Hacienda started.
Little communities where they're like, that's where the Asians are.
That's where the whites are.
That's where the black dudes are.
But do you think that if you had a time machine and you went back where cavemen
were, right,
and you were wearing modern clothes, they would freak out?
They probably, well, they kill you on sight.
Like I'm wearing like a FUBU tracksuit.
You don't own that, do you?
I know, but I would buy one.
Yeah.
Like a full FUBU tracksuit.
Yeah.
They might like it.
A fedora.
Do you think they'd be like, who, who, who?
They'd kill you on sight.
Oh, they would?
Well, because you'd look like a future person.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, really?
Like a spacesuit.
Like that.
Yeah.
If we show up, me, Donnell.
Yeah, yeah.
You, who else?
Doc.
Me, you, Doc, Donnell.
Yeah, Donnell.
And just with full-blown identical FUBU tracksuits.
FUBU tracksuits.
They'd be excited at first.
Yeah, yeah.
Because we'd look like we're like a group of aliens.
Yeah, yeah.
Oh, they, we would.
And different colors too, imagine.
No.
A Korean and a redhead and black guys.
You know what I would do?
And we'd start rapping.
Right.
Oh, oh, oh.
Imagine how happy they'd be to hear rap.
Right.
Because they would go.
Yeah.
They would start going along.
Yeah, yeah.
They would hear the rhythm.
Yeah.
That'd be cool, dude.
One of the cavemen starts fucking robotting.
Yeah.
And then they kill us and eat us.
And wear the clothes.
If you, would you ever eat human?
If you had.
Or have.
If you had to.
If you had to.
Like that one movie, is it Alive or?
Alive, yeah.
The soccer team.
The soccer team.
Yeah.
Would you do it?
I don't know what, I presume I would because I don't know what extreme hunger
is like.
What if you got into a plane accident and you crashed in the Andes mountains
but you still
were taking your Ozempic to curb your appetite for humans?
Like you would just.
Oh, I would definitely do that.
You would just double down on it.
Oh, double down on it.
Then you're like, well, I'm not that hungry.
Right.
And everyone's like, how are you?
How are you doing this?
Yeah.
Nothing.
All right.
Anyway, thank you for being a bad friend.
Great.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.

Thanksgiving with Michael Bay

- Can I ask you a question?
- Yeah.
- I got invited to a Thanksgiving with somebody.
Should I go, you think?
- Can you tell them?
- Michael Bay.
- Michael Bay.
- Yeah.
- You're gonna blow up that bathroom.
- Yeah.
- Imagine the whole table just explodes.
Lights on fire.
- You think I should go?
- I have no plans.
- From a personal perspective?
Do you want to come to my house?
- Who's going to your house?
- Nobody, my cousin and a friend or two.
- Yeah, maybe.
- You come to my house?
- Yeah, maybe.
But if the Michael Bay thing is real, I'll go there.
- 100%.
- Yeah.
I know your priorities.
- Yeah, yeah.
- Best friend, Michael Bay.
- I just think that it would be like an interesting story.
- Of course.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- Okay, here my assumption,
the reason I didn't invite you to Thanksgiving, honestly,
my assumption is you would not want to do that.
- Well, you know, well, can I say something to you?
Have I not been showing up to places?
- No, you do.
- Lately, I've been being very mindful
about going to different places.
- I agree.
- And when I get invited and I go.
- But I'm saying--
- I go to raves, whatever.
- We talked about inviting you.
- Yeah.
- And my wife was like, "Do you want to invite Bob?"
I said, "Yeah, but I don't think
he would like this kind of thing."
Because I don't know, you know, traditionally.
- If you're going to be anal, then no.
- I am, I'm sure.
- Well, I'm going to be a mess.
- Yeah.
Yeah, I don't want you at the house.
- I'm going, I'm going.
- No, go to Michael Bay.
Please, please.
Now that I think about it.
- There's cranberry sauce on the ceiling?
- Yeah.
There's another thing that I've noticed is
at this comedy store, people have been like,
I had a waitress come up to me and go,
"Have you been working out?"
I go, "No."
Why are you laughing?
- I'm saying the Ozempic is working.
- And then Steph Tolove goes, "Oh, I see it now."
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
- Stand up, stand up for real.
- Well, I'm not--
- Just stand up.
You don't have to do anything else but stand up.
We can see it.
It's an obvious difference.
- Can you or no?
- Yes.
- Be honest.
- You said it every fucking day.
- It used to protrude.
- Wait a minute.
What did you say, Carlos?
You can't tell?
- I can't tell.
So I see him every day.
- You can totally tell.
- You need to take more.
- Oh my God.
- Oh my God.
- What are you doing?
- See, that's what I'm saying.
He wants me to overdose on Ozempic.
- No, don't do this.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
He wants me to die.
- No, it's like weed.
You can't overdose.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- No, you literally can.
And also, let's stop plugging Ozempic.
It's fucking Waygovy.
- Waygovy, yeah, yeah.
- The other one.
- Oh, okay.
- The amount of people that commented on my Instagram
about you, they were let down
'cause they thought you were on Ozempic.
And so they were too.
- Yeah.
- But now you're on Waygovy,
and now people were like, fuck, I gotta switch.
- No, I'm still on, I have Black Market Ozempic too.
- Oh, you do?
You're a bad boy.
- Yeah.
- Waygovy guy.
- I do both, I do both.
- The smeglitude, but it is working.
Everyone on tour has said that.
There was a few ladies that said that on tour.
I mean, it was just true.
The truth is the truth.
- I'm so hungry.
- But don't eat.
- I'm not.
- Yeah, just don't.
Bobby wants it because he wants to be,
say it with me.
- Hollywood.
- Ripped.
Well, you wanna be ripped.
- Jacked, I think it was.
- Jacked.
Ripped and jacked.
- What did you say in the van?
- You'll see.
- You'll see.
- You'll see.
- And that's the name of the special, you'll see.
Be jacked, absolute jacked and ripped.
And you know what?
I think you're on your way.
I mean, you're definitely losing the weight.
Are you late night snacking?
- No.
- No, look at me, nothing.
- Mm-mm.
- Not even like a KitKat or a chippy?
- Well, last night, I went to Shabu Shabu.
It was my first meal.
- Of the day.
- Of the day.
And then after the store, Andrea Jin goes,
"Let's go have dinner."
I'm like, "I already ate."
And she's like, "Just call."
So I went to Sunundang, right?
And they had a couple of dumplings.
And then that's there.
- That's nothing.
- Dude, I've been going to Wii Spa every day.
It's been great.
In fact, last night at Wii Spa, it's so interesting.
I'm in the fucking dry sauna, completely naked.
And I sit like this.
- That's how you're supposed to sit.
You know what I mean?
I just got to sit like this.
And I lean like this.
- Mm-hmm.
- You know, and there's only a lot of black guys in there,
which I love.
Like, "What's up, brah?"
"What's up, man?"
- You got to show off.
- Yeah, and I do this.
I'm not afraid of my little guy, right?
There's two white dudes sitting there,
and I was looking at them like this.
I was looking at them like this.
And they were like, "What are you looking at, man?"
You guys.
- Yeah, I'm looking right at you.
- Yeah, yeah.
And they go, "Oh."
They go, "What do you guys do?"
I go, "We're actors."
We just moved here from, I forgot where.
You know, I got there and we talked a little bit about,
it's dry, you know what I mean?
- Mm-hmm.
- And then later when I'm like done,
they come up to me and they go,
"You're Bobby Lee, I can't believe it."
I go, "Why didn't you say that in the dry sauna?"
- Yeah, why'd you say that, yeah.
You didn't think it was the penis thing?
You think that- - I don't think so.
What do you think?
- Well, they might have been threatened.
- I mean, but it's like, why don't,
you can just say, "Hey, you're Bobby Lee, right?
What's the problem here?"
- Well, 'cause it's kind of hard to,
your cock is right there,
so they might want to save the excitement
for when they don't see your cock.
- Oh, what if I started getting harder?
- That's why.
- That would be so funny, dude.
- That's what I'm talking about.
- You're Bobby Lee, "Doo."
- You do get excited when people notice you.
- Yeah, I love, when's the last time you went to Wee Spa?
- Forever.
- Yeah?
- It's been so long.
- Have you gone?
- No, I don't know.
- I love it though, I wanna go back.
- You're going every day?
- To Wee Spa?
- Yeah.
- I'm not going to that dry sauna with you.
- Why?
- There's a women's department.
There's a women's department.
- Yeah, there's a section.
- It's like men and women.
- You would go in your own section?
- Yeah.
- What is it like, walk me through it,
because I have no idea what it is.
- Can I ask you something?
- Yeah.
- I'm not trying to start anything at all.
- Yeah.
- Are there trans people in the saunas?
- No.
- Okay.
- There was a controversy at Wee Spa.
Do you know the controversy?
- No.
- So Wee Spa, see that photo right there?
They give you clothes, and so there's a co-ed area
of the spa.
- But there's no nudity.
- There's no nudity.
There's like a clay room, a salt room,
and then we're fully clothed with other people,
and you steam out there and do your thing there.
- You can meditate, there's yoga.
There's a women's department too, right?
Anyway, the controversy was, if you go to Wee Spa,
there's kids.
- Sure.
- Running around.
There's like a lot of like, in my section,
little boys running around.
- Not late at night, but yes.
- Even late at night.
- Sometime?
- Yeah.
- Wow.
- Yeah, yeah.
Even late at night, you'll see like a Korean kickoff.
You know what I mean?
Right?
And you're trying to like, you know what I mean, be cool,
you know, but you know what I mean?
- Yeah.
- You gotta be cool.
- Gotta be cool, man.
- So a couple years ago, a man, a woman.
- A trans woman, right.
- Who hasn't had the procedure.
- Sure.
- Went to the women's department.
And there's little girls there.
- Right.
- That's what happened.
Right, Reid?
- That's right here.
- Yeah, and then there was protest
'cause they kicked the guy out, the girl out.
- A trans woman with the presence of a nude individual
with a penis, most commonly believed as a trans woman.
The women's changing area of the spa.
The video went viral, attracting significant attention
from gender critical feminists.
Also termed trans exclusionary, oh, TERFs, right.
And some media, which led to protests and counter protests.
Some media outlets initially questioned
whether or not the alleged incident had been a hoax.
They reported, again, the transgender woman
was charged with indecent exposure
relating to the alleged incident
after four women and one minor girl
filed police reports in July.
Suspect is awaiting trial on seven counts of exposure.
And finally, judge ruled that the indecent exposure case
could proceed citing the testimony of two witnesses
and the individual in question had partial or full erection
for a duration of 30 to 60 minutes during the incident.
That's a bummer.
It's a bummer to have a boner.
But that spa is phenomenal.
I mean, if I could walk around there hard, I would.
Yeah.
Imagine taking a fucking blue chew
then going to Wee Spa.
But it's also a cultural thing.
It's like, it's a Korean establishment, right?
That's right.
What?
Yeah.
Yes.
And they're like, you know,
it's just a different culture.
And it was just like, what else are they going to do?
You're saying they, you saying they're just in their,
in their removal of the.
If there's, I mean,
'cause I know that there's always little girls
and little boys, right?
I'm talking about five, six year old kids running around.
Right.
And it's just a part of Korean culture
to bring your kids to a spa.
It's like, you know?
Yeah.
And I would do it if I was a father.
And I don't know.
I just think that it's inappropriate.
It's hard for your kid to see someone else's penis.
This kid only sees my penis.
My kid sees my penis.
Yeah.
But they're little girls, right?
So he's in the women's department.
I know.
You know what I mean?
Do you remember the first time you saw your dad's penis,
by the way?
When I saw it or sucked it.
Okay.
You should have did.
I remember the moment I see my dad's penis.
I mean, what a bummer.
I almost grew up on a nudist colony.
Did I ever tell you guys that?
What?
Did I ever?
You almost did?
So you didn't.
No, my dad wanted to take me to a nudist colony.
And my mom was like,
I don't want the first penis she sees to be your penis.
How old were you?
I don't even remember it,
but it had to have been after they were divorced.
So probably around six to eight.
Seven.
Yeah.
Wow.
A nudist colony.
Different life.
Are there any nudist colonies in Southern California?
Welcome to Southern California's premier family nudist resort
and RV park located halfway between Los Angeles and San Diego.
Glen Eden is nestled 154 acres with the base
of the Cleveland National Forest.
We're the perfect combination for a resort for amenities and nature.
Dude, we have to go to this.
There's a nude.
And look, it's a Korean woman on the photo.
Glen Eden Sun Club here in Southern California,
the largest member owned nudist and resort club.
I am joining.
Why?
Because dude, clothes are so fucking dumb.
I know, but look at, look, look at that photo to the left, right?
Yeah.
Those are what we're going to be saying.
Yeah. I don't want to grow up there.
Fun, fun, fun.
Like Clint Eastwood's dust dick.
Hello, partner.
You know what I mean?
Just no, no, I'm saying retire here.
I don't want to, I don't think you should grow up here.
I should retire.
I want to retire here.
Oh, okay. I mean-
Don't you hate laundry?
Yeah.
Imagine never doing laundry again and every day waking up, eating naked,
swimming naked,
hanging out naked.
Not worrying about it.
You love the Wii Spa naked in the sauna.
Imagine if that's every day.
That's true.
And because you've got a nice little cock who cares, run around with it.
What's the difference?
And they do Toys for Tots.
That's great.
Yeah.
I mean, this place is fantastic.
Yeah.
And look at this.
They're plant-based.
You can go vegan there if you feel like it.
I'm in.
Call us up.
Call us.
There's just some things you can't do naked.
When did clothes first start happening?
Cavemen, probably.
Well, I'm sure, I mean, before anything, clothes were probably for fucking
warmth.
And protection, yeah.
And protection.
And 